So say every leader of the world meets at a party and gets drunk and decides for some reason to allow 1 person in the world to be ruler for a day. And guess what chucklenuts you've got the chance? So what do you do?
Ruler of the Planet for 24 Hours
- Thread starter shadowstriker86
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No matter what you do, nothing will have long lasting effects...so ending wars or any crazy (helpful) things for the world will be ignored the next day, so I'm giving myself a huge wad of cash, something small enough that each country couldn't be bothered trying to get it back, but plenty to live comfortably on for the rest of my life.
First, find out what rules I'm playing under. Not much point to being the ruler for the day if I'm bound by the rules of, say, the President of the United States, who has the actual power to do just about bugger all. Second, find out of my rulings stand after the day ends. If everyone will just switch things back tomorrow, not much point in not spending the day faffing about.
If I really do have absolute power, and my decisions stand when that day is over, then I obviously have far more options.
1. Legalize gay marriage worldwide.
2. Revoke tax exempt status from any church that argues against 1. The law won't force you to marry people, and if they really are of your religion they won't want to violate your rules. But your rules don't apply to anyone who isn't your religion, so suck an elf and get over it.
3. Legalize soft recreational drugs (like marijuana), but vastly increase the sentences for public intoxication. Set up safe houses for people who want to get high, and have them paid for by drug sales. Driving a car under the influence of anything, even alcohol, is considered attempted murder. I don't care what you do to your bodies, but you endanger other people with your stupidity and you go down hard.
4. Bomb the shit out of the Westboro Baptist Church. Because fuck those guys. If I had longer than a day, I'd enact a law that forces them to sit down and shut up, but at the same time has enough provisions in it to not turn into a tool for the government to potentially shut down people who aren't massive tools. But I only have a day, so the hell with it. Bombs away, you guys asked for that.
5. Demand Namco-BANDAI translate and release IDOLM@STER outside of Japan. I want to play that game.
6. Outlaw war entirely. All international disputes will be settled on the football pitch. Best team wins.
7. Demand American football change its' name. That is not a football. And as you all have to do what I say, you will get with the rest of the world on this.
8. While we're getting you caught up with the rest of the world. Celsius. Metric. Learn it.
9. Find me the Fox executive who decided to cancel Firefly. We're going to shoot him on live TV. Not kill him, just like shoot him in the leg or something.
10. This [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGOMnE26jNo] is a French cartoon that was translated to English and run when I was little. Figure out who has the rights and put it on DVD.
11. All secondary schools will teach a class on actually living as an adult when you get out of school. Budgeting, cooking for yourself, an understanding of how your government works, critical thinking, spotting bias in news stories, et cetera. The class is vital to graduation, and rather than a final exam you can cram for, you will be expected to prove you have really learned the material over the last couple of months of school.
12. Science classes will become far more emphasised, and also a requirement for graduation. Evolution will be introduced as early as possible, and a full semester of secondary school will be spent on the scientific definition of "theory". Another semester will be spent on dinosaurs, because they are awesome.
13. Demand that serious effort be put into making petroleum-free cars. Any automaker who has not started production on a hybrid by one year from the date I take power will lose their license to operate in every country. They have five years to get a petrol-free car working. Get started.
14. Moon base. Get planning.
15. Reality TV is banned. The History Channel will be about history again. Anyone wishing to put forward that aliens, ghosts, bigfoot, demons, or any other sort of cryptozoology actually exist will speak to the scientific community, not put a television show on Sci-Fi.
16. Educate all of humanity about their right to not be offended. This right is exercised by walking away. Don't like seeing something? Stop looking at it. Don't like what someone is saying? Stop listening. Massive jerks will get what is coming to them (see #4), but, as an example, if seeing a woman breastfeed her child in public, or a gay couple kissing bothers you, stop looking. Problem solved.
17. Airlines will measure passengers by girth. If you exceed the size that one seat will hold, you will buy a second seat.
18. Demand a meeting between various Middle East and Western leaders. They will be assigned to Jury Duty hell. They will live in hotel rooms, spending 100% of their time at a conference, and unable to leave until they work out their differences. The Israel/Palestine thing will be sorted out, as well as the general theme of anti-Westernism. A workable solution FOR ALL PARTIES will be found, or they're not leaving.
19. Sting vs. Undertaker. WrestleMania. Make it happen.
20. Tigers are the official animal of the entire Earth. Breed them, take care of them, get them off the endangered species list.
If I really do have absolute power, and my decisions stand when that day is over, then I obviously have far more options.
1. Legalize gay marriage worldwide.
2. Revoke tax exempt status from any church that argues against 1. The law won't force you to marry people, and if they really are of your religion they won't want to violate your rules. But your rules don't apply to anyone who isn't your religion, so suck an elf and get over it.
3. Legalize soft recreational drugs (like marijuana), but vastly increase the sentences for public intoxication. Set up safe houses for people who want to get high, and have them paid for by drug sales. Driving a car under the influence of anything, even alcohol, is considered attempted murder. I don't care what you do to your bodies, but you endanger other people with your stupidity and you go down hard.
4. Bomb the shit out of the Westboro Baptist Church. Because fuck those guys. If I had longer than a day, I'd enact a law that forces them to sit down and shut up, but at the same time has enough provisions in it to not turn into a tool for the government to potentially shut down people who aren't massive tools. But I only have a day, so the hell with it. Bombs away, you guys asked for that.
5. Demand Namco-BANDAI translate and release IDOLM@STER outside of Japan. I want to play that game.
6. Outlaw war entirely. All international disputes will be settled on the football pitch. Best team wins.
7. Demand American football change its' name. That is not a football. And as you all have to do what I say, you will get with the rest of the world on this.
8. While we're getting you caught up with the rest of the world. Celsius. Metric. Learn it.
9. Find me the Fox executive who decided to cancel Firefly. We're going to shoot him on live TV. Not kill him, just like shoot him in the leg or something.
10. This [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGOMnE26jNo] is a French cartoon that was translated to English and run when I was little. Figure out who has the rights and put it on DVD.
11. All secondary schools will teach a class on actually living as an adult when you get out of school. Budgeting, cooking for yourself, an understanding of how your government works, critical thinking, spotting bias in news stories, et cetera. The class is vital to graduation, and rather than a final exam you can cram for, you will be expected to prove you have really learned the material over the last couple of months of school.
12. Science classes will become far more emphasised, and also a requirement for graduation. Evolution will be introduced as early as possible, and a full semester of secondary school will be spent on the scientific definition of "theory". Another semester will be spent on dinosaurs, because they are awesome.
13. Demand that serious effort be put into making petroleum-free cars. Any automaker who has not started production on a hybrid by one year from the date I take power will lose their license to operate in every country. They have five years to get a petrol-free car working. Get started.
14. Moon base. Get planning.
15. Reality TV is banned. The History Channel will be about history again. Anyone wishing to put forward that aliens, ghosts, bigfoot, demons, or any other sort of cryptozoology actually exist will speak to the scientific community, not put a television show on Sci-Fi.
16. Educate all of humanity about their right to not be offended. This right is exercised by walking away. Don't like seeing something? Stop looking at it. Don't like what someone is saying? Stop listening. Massive jerks will get what is coming to them (see #4), but, as an example, if seeing a woman breastfeed her child in public, or a gay couple kissing bothers you, stop looking. Problem solved.
17. Airlines will measure passengers by girth. If you exceed the size that one seat will hold, you will buy a second seat.
18. Demand a meeting between various Middle East and Western leaders. They will be assigned to Jury Duty hell. They will live in hotel rooms, spending 100% of their time at a conference, and unable to leave until they work out their differences. The Israel/Palestine thing will be sorted out, as well as the general theme of anti-Westernism. A workable solution FOR ALL PARTIES will be found, or they're not leaving.
19. Sting vs. Undertaker. WrestleMania. Make it happen.
20. Tigers are the official animal of the entire Earth. Breed them, take care of them, get them off the endangered species list.
1.Force education until completion of Year 12.
2.2 children per couple limit, to stop the bludgers.
3.Make public transport run on time.
4.Force everyone to have a job, but give them freedom of choice.
5.Spend LOTS OF MONEY on education. We seriously need it.
6.Teach people to stop overreacting and get stop getting offended at everything.
7.Enforce harsher penalties for alcohol fueled assaults.
Suddenly, Australia is a good place to live.
2.2 children per couple limit, to stop the bludgers.
3.Make public transport run on time.
4.Force everyone to have a job, but give them freedom of choice.
5.Spend LOTS OF MONEY on education. We seriously need it.
6.Teach people to stop overreacting and get stop getting offended at everything.
7.Enforce harsher penalties for alcohol fueled assaults.
Suddenly, Australia is a good place to live.
All churches (and other religious building equivalents) are stripped of valuables and remade into free housing.
Goodbye censorship, hello gladiatorial fights to the death in almost every state and province.
Institute a worldwide 2 child limit to help with overpopulation. People that have more than 2 children already will be left alone.
Outlaw frivolous lawsuits.
To conserve money, executions will be issued in the cheapest way possible which in most cases will involve use of a poleaxe.
Lastly, use mass propaganda to make everyone shut up and tolerate each others differences.
Institute a worldwide 2 child limit to help with overpopulation. People that have more than 2 children already will be left alone.
Outlaw frivolous lawsuits.
To conserve money, executions will be issued in the cheapest way possible which in most cases will involve use of a poleaxe.
Lastly, use mass propaganda to make everyone shut up and tolerate each others differences.
This world would not do well under my dictatorship.
1. Confirmed Rapists and Murderers would be taken out back and shot in the head immediately.
2. 2 children max per family, which I think is reasonable because it's mostly lower class families that have a lot of kids, and they are usually the ones who can't afford a lot of kids.
3. EA and Activision would be bombed.
4. Bioware and Bethesda would be forced to make a game together, which Bioware's writers from back when they didn't use multi-colored endings.
5. Religion would be banned from having any part what so ever in any government - If you want to believe, go ahead, but I will NOT allow laws to be dictated by a book written by some dude.
6. It would be illegal to be Obese, and programs would be in place to better educate people on proper exercise and diet.
I have millions more, but 6 is enough for now. Btw, due to my 24 hours of control, I would make a law where I have full control forever. Because that is how I roll.
1. Confirmed Rapists and Murderers would be taken out back and shot in the head immediately.
2. 2 children max per family, which I think is reasonable because it's mostly lower class families that have a lot of kids, and they are usually the ones who can't afford a lot of kids.
3. EA and Activision would be bombed.
4. Bioware and Bethesda would be forced to make a game together, which Bioware's writers from back when they didn't use multi-colored endings.
5. Religion would be banned from having any part what so ever in any government - If you want to believe, go ahead, but I will NOT allow laws to be dictated by a book written by some dude.
6. It would be illegal to be Obese, and programs would be in place to better educate people on proper exercise and diet.
I have millions more, but 6 is enough for now. Btw, due to my 24 hours of control, I would make a law where I have full control forever. Because that is how I roll.
Well have a 23 hour straight gladiatorial deathmatch between famous celebrities than during the last hour, nuke every single country in the world (but not to heavily, leave some survivors) so I can live the rest of my life in a Fallout esque world.
Hmm, I'm going to assume that any and all laws I make get are likely to be repealed the next day. That means whatever changes I make must be... difficult if not impossible to reverse, and possible to complete within however many hours are left.
I could cause a hell of a lot of destruction with those limitations, but not much in the way of lasting good.
I'm tempted to draw up a hit list for the worst criminals and dictators around the world and send squads out to finish them off, but there's no time to handle it discreetly, a necessary requirement to avoid causing more chaos than is solved.
Ooh, I know. I'll make a law stating that anyone holding any patent that hasn't actually done anything with it for the past five years immediately loses the rights to that patent. Anyone in the future that simply appears to be sitting on a patent for great lengths of time loses it as well. Simultaneously I'd publicly explain why this law is necessary, focusing in particular on the practice of companies that do nothing and produce nothing except sit on perpetually unused patents until someone attempts to actually make a product based on that information, then sue their asses off. People would have a hard time justifying reinstating that situation.
Rather weak compared to what I'd really like to do, but oh well...
I could cause a hell of a lot of destruction with those limitations, but not much in the way of lasting good.
I'm tempted to draw up a hit list for the worst criminals and dictators around the world and send squads out to finish them off, but there's no time to handle it discreetly, a necessary requirement to avoid causing more chaos than is solved.
Ooh, I know. I'll make a law stating that anyone holding any patent that hasn't actually done anything with it for the past five years immediately loses the rights to that patent. Anyone in the future that simply appears to be sitting on a patent for great lengths of time loses it as well. Simultaneously I'd publicly explain why this law is necessary, focusing in particular on the practice of companies that do nothing and produce nothing except sit on perpetually unused patents until someone attempts to actually make a product based on that information, then sue their asses off. People would have a hard time justifying reinstating that situation.
Rather weak compared to what I'd really like to do, but oh well...
1) Any and all laws that I pass shall be in place for as long as people say that they want them to be removed.
2) Homosexuals are fine, let them get married and stop with the shit fits already, you're adults, fucking act like it. Further more, anyone who use the the word "fagget" will be punished by 40 lashes with a barbed wire whip.
3) Destroy the Westboro Baptist Church the day of my global coronation, by any means necessary. I really don't care how, just get it done. Use anything you want, high explosives, low explosives, fire, termites, sledgehammers, olive forks, what ever. The first person to do so will receive the sum of the equivalent of 50 million of the highest ranked global currency converted into the currency of their home.
4) Find who ever decided to cancel the Constellation project for NASA, cover him with brown sauce and throw him into a cage with a rabid wolverine thats high on angel dust.
5) Any and all poachers caught will be feed to either the animal they were hunting or, if that animal can't or won't kill a human, they will be put in a container filled with poison dart frogs.
6) The internet, the thing you're on, is no longer able to be censored by any one. EVER. Anyone who acts against this will be air dropped onto a deserted island.
7) We will get rid of the global electric network of wires, and instead now use the towers that Tesla wanted to build to create a radiant energy field around the world. They will be large than the one built at Wardenclyffe, and be strategically placed around the world.
8) From now on, everyone must complete 12 years of school, and pass an all encompassing test.
8-2) Anyone caught stealing from a schools budget, no matter how small an about they take, shall under go chemical amnesia treatments and be forced to go through 12 more years of schooling to catch back up.
8-3) Schools will not be forced to change their lunch menu or switch their vending machines to supply children with healthy foods. Instead it will be up to the parents to determine what it is that their children eat. If the parent doesn't like what is available, then it is up to them to supply better alternatives. An exception will be made for those who are on a free lunch program . As well physical education will now be mandatory in all 12 years of mandatory schooling.
9) Any and all reality tv shows are to be moved to their own channel, designed specifically for them. This channel will be viewable only through a subscription via your television or satellite provider, with a limited time frame to show commercials on other channels.
10) On the 23 hour of my reign, I will be paid the sum of $523,500,000.27 in USD. this sum will by met by nations paying portions of it, as well as some being forcibly taken from, to be read given by, private investors.
that is about all for now
2) Homosexuals are fine, let them get married and stop with the shit fits already, you're adults, fucking act like it. Further more, anyone who use the the word "fagget" will be punished by 40 lashes with a barbed wire whip.
3) Destroy the Westboro Baptist Church the day of my global coronation, by any means necessary. I really don't care how, just get it done. Use anything you want, high explosives, low explosives, fire, termites, sledgehammers, olive forks, what ever. The first person to do so will receive the sum of the equivalent of 50 million of the highest ranked global currency converted into the currency of their home.
4) Find who ever decided to cancel the Constellation project for NASA, cover him with brown sauce and throw him into a cage with a rabid wolverine thats high on angel dust.
5) Any and all poachers caught will be feed to either the animal they were hunting or, if that animal can't or won't kill a human, they will be put in a container filled with poison dart frogs.
6) The internet, the thing you're on, is no longer able to be censored by any one. EVER. Anyone who acts against this will be air dropped onto a deserted island.
7) We will get rid of the global electric network of wires, and instead now use the towers that Tesla wanted to build to create a radiant energy field around the world. They will be large than the one built at Wardenclyffe, and be strategically placed around the world.
8) From now on, everyone must complete 12 years of school, and pass an all encompassing test.
8-2) Anyone caught stealing from a schools budget, no matter how small an about they take, shall under go chemical amnesia treatments and be forced to go through 12 more years of schooling to catch back up.
8-3) Schools will not be forced to change their lunch menu or switch their vending machines to supply children with healthy foods. Instead it will be up to the parents to determine what it is that their children eat. If the parent doesn't like what is available, then it is up to them to supply better alternatives. An exception will be made for those who are on a free lunch program . As well physical education will now be mandatory in all 12 years of mandatory schooling.
9) Any and all reality tv shows are to be moved to their own channel, designed specifically for them. This channel will be viewable only through a subscription via your television or satellite provider, with a limited time frame to show commercials on other channels.
10) On the 23 hour of my reign, I will be paid the sum of $523,500,000.27 in USD. this sum will by met by nations paying portions of it, as well as some being forcibly taken from, to be read given by, private investors.
that is about all for now
i would first ban all religion, music that isnt metal or dubstep will be banned. also any resources that can be spared with out causing harm to daily life will be put towards space travel
Gays can marry everywhere, religion is permitted but not allowed to affect the judgement of governments, and all forms of weaponry designed solely for the purpose of killing will be destroyed (for example, knives are used for cooking and would therefore not be destroyed).
I'd make it legal for me to be a vigilante, then I'd open up the secret technology vaults we know the government has knocking around, steal the gear and fight crime. Also bang some bitches.
I'd also set up a concert with all my favourite bands playing and make it free for everybody to attend.
I'd also set up a concert with all my favourite bands playing and make it free for everybody to attend.