Rumor: Plot for Star Wars 7 Leaks Out

[woodaba]

...they erased KotOR and the Thrawn trilogy for this shit?

 

[Scorpid]

LOL this had to be a joke. Their are massive plot holes all over just the premise of the opening. For example can we assume its the same hand from Empire Strikes Back? If so how did the hand get into space? Or does Luke just have a habit of getting his hand lopped off? Also how did the hand survive reentry to a planet? Why is the husband of rebel hero that is also a high ranking noble still gallivanting around the galaxy as a smuggler? And seriously a solar system destroying super weapon? That just stinks of dumb and trying to out do the original trilogy when most people acknowledge that the Death Stars were silly weapons in the first place. And than the names granted, Luke is a common name but the rest of the names in the universe tend to not be modern generic names. John and Daisy... and since its probably Tatooin they're on, get the hell off that planet. JJ Abrahms don't just rehash the worst elements of the original trilogy and the prequels.

 

[Soviet Heavy]

It's like somebody mixed The Glove of Darth Vader with the Sun Crusher plot of the Jedi Academy Trilogy. This is a bad thing.

 

[Rag Doll]

What rubs me the wrong way is the "Hasn't seen Luke since the end of the last movie" part. Why? He was in love with the guy's sister, they were best friends and were working in the same alliance. Is the movie going to pretend that the Star Wars-universe literally just stopped for 30 years, before Luke's severed magic hand drops from the sky and two craaaa-zy characters go on an "adventure". The problem with this is, it goes against every expanded universe story, game, spin-off and book that has attempted to make the Universe feel like a real living, breathing place.

 

[Kyrian007]

Yeah, how does anyone expect to believe that a hand could survive re-entry? You know, in a universe where...

Where magic users use magic to keep lasers from coming more than a couple hundred cm out of their LASERSWORDS.

All planets consist of only one biome.

A gaseous fuel source allows spaceships to travel outside of reality to circumvent the speed of light.

Laserblasts somehow travel slower than the speed of light and somehow can be dodged.

And so on...

Sheesh, learn how to suspend disbelief. At least they tried to "explain" the force with the microscopic parasites. Everyone loved when they did that right?

I kid, it does sound pretty dumb.

 

[PortalThinker113]

LOL this had to be a joke. Their are massive plot holes all over just the premise of the opening. For example can we assume its the same hand from Empire Strikes Back? If so how did the hand get into space? Or does Luke just have a habit of getting his hand lopped off? Also how did the hand survive reentry to a planet? Why is the husband of rebel hero that is also a high ranking noble still gallivanting around the galaxy as a smuggler? And seriously a solar system destroying super weapon? That just stinks of dumb and trying to out do the original trilogy when most people acknowledge that the Death Stars were silly weapons in the first place. And than the names granted, Luke is a common name but the rest of the names in the universe tend to not be modern generic names. John and Daisy... and since its probably Tatooin they're on, get the hell off that planet. JJ Abrahms don't just rehash the worst elements of the original trilogy and the prequels.

John and Daisy are the actors' names. No one outside of the film's production knows what their characters' names are yet.

From the author of the scoop, Devin Faraci, on Twitter:

Also, I'm not sure why people are so convinced my scoop ties into EMPIRE at all. That is never stated. And doesn't make much sense.

— Devin Faraci (@devincf) July 20, 2014 [https://twitter.com/devincf/statuses/490967677087657984]


One other thing: what if the object's origin is SUPPOSED TO BE THE DRIVING MYSTERY OF THE MOVIE? This isn't rocket science.

— Devin Faraci (@devincf) July 20, 2014 [https://twitter.com/devincf/statuses/490968847462064128]


"How did it get there? Where did it come from? This makes no sense!" Yes, you have identified the plot driver. Congrats.

— Devin Faraci (@devincf) July 20, 2014 [https://twitter.com/devincf/statuses/490969374547644416]

In other words, yelling about plot holes in a movie that we have not seen a second of footage from and know a suggestion of a premise is incredibly premature. We shouldn't be so quick to assume things. Yes, the lightsaber is Luke's, but does that mean it is Luke's hand? What if someone took it from him, then lost THEIR hand? Very possible. Yeah, why IS Han still gallivanting around the galaxy? Maybe he and Leia didn't work out. Maybe he has an official mission of some kind. We just don't know, so complaining about it now simply doesn't fly.

Yeah, how does anyone expect to believe that a hand could survive re-entry? You know, in a universe where...

Where magic users use magic to keep lasers from coming more than a couple hundred cm out of their LASERSWORDS.

All planets consist of only one biome.

A gaseous fuel source allows spaceships to travel outside of reality to circumvent the speed of light.

Laserblasts somehow travel slower than the speed of light and somehow can be dodged.

And so on...

Sheesh, learn how to suspend disbelief. At least they tried to "explain" the force with the microscopic parasites. Everyone loved when they did that right?

I kid, it does sound pretty dumb.

Took the words right out of my mouth. I'm not exactly relying on scientific accuracy from Star Wars.

 

[PortalThinker113]

And this bit sounds a bit dumb:

Their quest takes them off world, and they meet up with Han Solo and Chewbacca, who aren't flying around in the Millenium Falcon anymore but are piloting... well, that could be a spoiler.

Piloting something other than their iconic space bucket? The only thing that would be kind of fun to see them pilot is the bloody Death Star.

we already know the Millenium Falcon is in the movie.

its a full scale physical set at Pinewood.

Kevin Smith has been on it...

JJ has posted "accidental" pictures of the chess table...

as such this sounds a bit more than "dumb"...

He said that they do not START OUT in the Falcon. He never said the Falcon is not in the movie. They probably reacquire it about halfway through.

 

[leberkaese]

This sounds like the beginning of a really awful fanfic.

But, oh well, I don't care. I don't have even the slightest hope that these movies will be any good. There's not a single movie from Abrams I liked that much. Maybe Lost and Fringe were okay in the beginning but his movies? Super 8 was a nice throwback, but the rest was kind of dull.

 

[LG Jargon]

As soon as the hand in space lands on planet line came up. I started head butting a wall. Rally? That shit won't fly even if your five feking years old! This hogwash can not be real.

This is from the same person who gave us "alternate universe Spock" in the very first movie, so I'm not exactly surprised if it turns out to be true

Shit, what if this hand is from an alternate universe where Luke turned to the dark side? It will be like the Emperor except it can only communicate through space sign language. Then the final battle will be between Darth Hand and Luke's other hand that gets chopped off in Episode VII for some reason (space toast buttering accident?). Let the terrible CGI and lens flares commence!

...That statement is so beautiful and full of win, I want to print it out and marry it. Thank you for brightening my day.

OT: A severed hand floating in outer space? What is this, Dead Space? Or is Space Oprah just giving out severed hands for no reason? "YOU get a severed hand, and YOU get a severed hand! Every! Body! Gets! A! Severed! HAAAAAAND!"

Also, unless the ship they're piloting is some royal cruiser they got from Leia, there's probably no good reason to dump the Millennium Falcon. Seriously, how is the type of ship a spoiler in and of itself? ...Can't be an X-Wing: too small. An A-Wing (or whatever the Emperor's ship Luke used at the end of Return called)? Luke could've just given it to Han after he was done with it...Would he?

Yeah, this may be a small snippet of what might be in Episode 7, but if it's at all indicative of the final product, then I might just skip on this. Or at least wait for the reviews to start coming in.

 

[Starke]

Oh Jesus, they're doing the super weapon race the post Return of the Jedi Expanded Universe was plagued by, only a matter of time before we get the Sun Crusher

Really hoping this isn't the actual movie plot, it's dumb, dumb, dumb

You mean like in the synopsis we already have?

Their quest takes them off world, and they meet up with Han Solo and Chewbacca, who aren't flying around in the Millenium Falcon anymore but are piloting... well, that could be a spoiler. I'll leave it. Anyway, Han and Chewie recognize the light saber as Luke's, and they say they haven't seen their friend in thirty years, since the events of Return of the Jedi.

So begins a quest to find the missing Jedi Master. Meanwhile, on an ice planet, nefarious forces are building a super weapon, one capable of destroying not planets but entire solar systems...

 

[Something Amyss]

I want this to be true. I will make SPACE HAAAAAAAAND jokes for the rest of my life if it's true. Which probably won't be long, because I'm sure if I keep saying "SPACE HAAAAAND!" someone will kill me.

Wait, they find the severed hand of luke? Really? A hand went from a gas giant to space and then somehow survived the re-entry?

It's a little known fact, but most of a Jedi's power is derived from his hands. That's where the term "disarmed" comes from. Anakin was so strong with the Force that losing both his hands didn't stop him, but you'll notice Mace Windu was screwed.

Oh, hey, that's it! They say the hand belongs to someone they know, but there's some mystery here apparently. Maybe it's Vader's hand, and it found its way to a desert planet when the Death Star exploded! Sith cybernetics are well known for withstanding re-entry.

and the hand ?...imo this is a clear allusion to the fate of Lukes hand from Empire

It's not an allusion. It's clearly Luke's hand. It's a Jedi hand that fell from space that Han and Chewie recognise. I mean, literally, what else would it be? There's not much in the way of ambiguity here. There's no need for an "IMO." This is clear to pretty much anyone who's watched Empire.

 

[PortalThinker113]

Also, John and Daisy? Fucking what? You gave one of the characters the most fucking common male name in the United States and named the other after a flower that might not even exist in the universe? Come on, at least give them uncommon names. I feel like they just looked out the window and went "Hey, thats Juan, tending the daisies in the garden! Gasp, thats it, a stroke of genius!"

John Boyega and Daisy Ridley are the actors playing the two leads of the film. Those are NOT the characters' names.

I know I'm being "that guy" about this particular point, and I apologize, but it's bothering me that multiple people have this misconception.

The other is John Boyega, who is playing someone trying to change his path in life (again, I'm keeping it vague here). They recognize the light saber as a Jedi relic and decide to return it to the proper people.

 

[Clowndoe]

An A-Wing (or whatever the Emperor's ship Luke used at the end of Return called)?

That's a Lambda-class shuttle. The A-Wing is the fighter that guy crashes into the Super Star Destroyer which takes it out.

 

[Racecarlock]

I hope Daisy Ridley the actress is that pteranodon boss from metroid so that we can at least have a cool dinosaur.

Right now, all this movie needs is a wacky animal sideki- STAY IN YOUR CAGE, JAR-JAR!

"It's scooby doo and the mystery of the missing hand with special guest stars han solo and chewbacca!"

 

[TerranV]

I gotta say that... sounds aweful.

 

[Something Amyss]

it's there because for some reason this forum makes me over cautious so i stick in loads of caveats.

wonder why that might be hmmm.....

-.-

Come to think of it, that's more than fair.

 

[franconbean]

I was hoping for something related to the extended universe books. This sounds less than promising. Since this is a leak, I'm hoping that it's some kind of hoax/untruth and that we get something better.