Scams, Frauds and you want access to my WHAT! now?

[Parasondox]

Who ever said they wish to live forever, FUCK OFF!! If you aren't loaded, do you really want to work all your life until you can't retire or die? Good luck.

Fucking People. Well that's an intro. I honestly do not get it. I really don't. Yes, you can finally call me a retard. You know. If you weren't already. Each day, yes day, at work I am always faced with a new notice about fraudulent activities and scams involving certain customers looking for money that isn't theirs and things they haven't earned.

Ring Ring. Ring Ring.

Me: Hello, Good afternoon.

Scammer: Hi I am coming from TalkTalk and there has been cases where your internet browser has flagged up a message about a virus attacking your browser and we here at TalkTalk need access to your computer to help you get rid of it.

Me: OK?

Scammer: So, sir, could you please log into your computer for me please so we can get started.

Me: First, can you tell me the name of the account holder you have there on your system?

Scammer: ...

Me: Hello? Are you there? Can you tell me who's name you have their seeing as you are from TalkTalk?

Scammer: ...

They hung up the phone. That all may look and sound familiar to you and luckily for me I can smell bullshit from 10 miles away. Also, I am not with TalkTalk so that convo was fun . Jackass!!

But really has money gotten so... I don't know what word to use there but has the pursuit of money just driven more and more people into getting things that aren't theirs?

There may be a bigger question here. The pursuit of money has often lead to some dangerous end. Has it gotten worse in the past 20 years with the growth of technology or are people so desperate for the latest what nots?

Or maybe just both.

Give us some of your funny, stupid or even troubling attempts at people trying to scam you.

There are those who scam and commit fraud that can and has destroyed people's lives. Those assholes deserves every harsh punishment given to them and then some more.

 

[MysticSlayer]

I haven't actually had to deal with a scam call. Well, at least I don't think I have. I've gotten a lot of calls in Spanish, but I don't know Spanish. I guess the Spanish calls should be expected, though, given that I have a Miami number.

However, apparently for the last week, my step-mom kept getting called over and over again. She even got a call at six in the morning on Sunday from what seemed to be an Ohio number (so same time zone). Yesterday, she finally just picked up the phone. She started off letting them know she was pissed off before calming down to let them talk. Unfortunately for them, she spent most of her life in banking and had dealt with customers that had been scammed. She asked a few questions, realized that they were vague or completely false answers, and then proceeded to yell at them for a couple minutes before hanging up.

Personally, I generally dislike it when people yell at someone on the phone. I always liked my older brother's approach: "Oh, I'm sorry, I have really bad diarrhea and have to go right now!" Since it was a scammer, though, I was sort of glad to see my step-mom absolutely let them have it. I was shocked, though, that she used almost no profanity.

 

[Silentpony_v1legacy]

I will never get used to the format of these threads, Parasondox. Its just so hard to follow or understand what I'm supposed to do.

As far the as jist, I've actually never had anyone try to actively scam me. Mostly because I keep tight control over my email address, don't use any Social Media, and never answer the phone if its not a number I recognize.
But I have noticed phone apps wanting access to stuff they have no use for. Angry Birds needs my contact list? Really?
The My Little Pony farmville game needs my text logs and settings?
A calculator app I tried to download wanted my call history and GPS location. I mean what the fuck?!

So I have very few apps on my phone.

 

[Paragon Fury]

You used to write for Cracked, didn't you Parasondox?

 

[Parasondox]

You used to write for Cracked, didn't you Parasondox?

Getting paid to write crap over the internet? I fucking wish.

I will never get used to the format of these threads, Parasondox. Its just so hard to follow or understand what I'm supposed to do.

I cant follow them either have the time. I find a topic, talk about it, for half of it and then wing it. I dont know.

 

[Redd the Sock]

I got the call saying I'd won the lottery. Makes me wish I played so I could at least entertain the idea it might be true. What was funny is when I get the scam (or just annoying unsolicited) calls I hang up, but he called back until I said I don't play the lottery so fuck off. The real crooks keep trying until they realize you're on to them.

 

[DefunctTheory]

You used to write for Cracked, didn't you Parasondox?

Hey! Stop stealing mah jokes!

I will never get used to the format of these threads, Parasondox. Its just so hard to follow or understand what I'm supposed to do.

I find it's easier to just read from the bottom, stopping when you get to an actual question or comment. The first 90% of his topics are essentially trash.

As for the thread, can't comment on anything funny or interesting. We get these calls pretty much every night, but it's pretty easy to spot them in the first 5 seconds and just hang up before any of the real bullshit starts.

 

[Silvanus]

I once had a scammer call me and say he was calling "from Windows XP" asking for access to my PC. I replied that Windows XP is the name of the product, not of the company, and called him the worst scammer I've ever encountered.

 

[Parasondox]

I once had a scammer call me and say he was calling "from Windows XP" asking for access to my PC. I replied that Windows XP is the name of the product, not of the company, and called him the worst scammer I've ever encountered.

Would have been worse and funnier if he called on behalf of Windows Vista. The forgotten company.

 

[Nielas]

I once had a scammer call me and say he was calling "from Windows XP" asking for access to my PC. I replied that Windows XP is the name of the product, not of the company, and called him the worst scammer I've ever encountered.

That might actually be a way for them to test if you are scammable. If you call them on it right away, they know that they need to move on and not waste their time. They must call hundreds of people before they hit someone gullible enough and computer illiterate enough to fall for this scam.

 

[aegix drakan_v1legacy]

Oh GOD, don't get me started.

At least 3 times a year, we get a call from "Windows security services" by someone usually with a VERY think indian accent telling me how my computer is infected.

I just hung up on them, but they kept calling. I told them "we have a mac". They kept calling. I (mid-game of League, back when I still played) chewed the guy out for being a "liar and thief and a goddamn piece of shit" and "What would your mother say if she knew you were stealing money from people who don't know any better and trust you? What do you have to say for yourself?!". I got a niiiice long pregnant pause on that one before he hung up.

I think the best though was when I said "I'm gonna have to put you on hold for a sec", and I just put on some song titled "Imma !@#$ you in the ass" I remembered hearing in an ad somewhere. 5 minutes later, the guy was STILL on the line! So I congratulated him for sitting through that and told him "no, I don't need a scam, thanks".

And the last time, I put on my heaviest Quebec French accent and told the guy (as he desperately tried to say "Sir, sir I am trying to help your computer, is very deadly malwared!!")"OSTIETABERFUCK on parle francais icitte espece de maudit immigrant, parle la langue ou dite rien espece de-" *click* XD Had fun channeling the asshole franco stereotype I've had the displeasure of meeting.

...And, funny story, some indian-accented (because it's ALWAYS indian accented) dude calling himself "Officer Ryan" called TWICE today (with the weird stuttering ringing that usually accompanies telemarketers) claiming to be from the CRA (the Canadian IRS), going "We have detected you have committed Tax Fraud on your tax return, call me back at this number immediately, and do not ignore! Is serious!" *click*

...I didn't say a word when I picked up the first time and he just said his canned line and hung up which is definitely not protocol for a government agency (second time I let the machine take it). Between looking it up on the CRA website and telling it to my dad, we're convinced it's a scammer (No WAY a CRA person would have protocol THAT shitty). So, if he left his number on the message (or the one on the display is legit), we're likely going to report it to the CRA via the hotline they have set up.

 

[Silvanus]

That might actually be a way for them to test if you are scammable. If you call them on it right away, they know that they need to move on and not waste their time. They must call hundreds of people before they hit someone gullible enough and computer illiterate enough to fall for this scam.

That sounds quite likely to be a thing that they do. This guy, however, repeated the line several times after being called on it, and-- after I'd called him a scammer outright and hung up, called back. There were a few other mistakes he made, too, but I can't recall them at the mo'.

I find it quite likely that scammers do test peoples' gullibility, but this guy was a doofus.

 

[DementedSheep]

I would have hung up at the first line. I don't have any patience for those scams.
There used to be one that tried this shit repeatedly (every couple of days, occasionally more than once on the same day) for some reason. You would have thought they would move on since it clearly wasn't going to work but they kept this up for over a month. Fuck off! we know you aren't Microsoft. Maybe they hoped there was kid or something who might answer the phone? The only person who might fall for this is my grandmother but she doesn't have a computer.

 

[Disco Biscuit]

I have a call blocker, and take great pleasure in whacking those numbers out of my existence. My cell just doesn't get them, since I'm insanely protective of that number.

 

[Major_Tom]

I've been watching a lot of Hoax Hotel, so I actually wish scammers would call me so I can waste their time and then call them a madarchod.

 

[Nielas]

...And, funny story, some indian-accented (because it's ALWAYS indian accented) dude calling himself "Officer Ryan" called TWICE today (with the weird stuttering ringing that usually accompanies telemarketers) claiming to be from the CRA (the Canadian IRS), going "We have detected you have committed Tax Fraud on your tax return, call me back at this number immediately, and do not ignore! Is serious!" *click*

...I didn't say a word when I picked up the first time and he just said his canned line and hung up which is definitely not protocol for a government agency (second time I let the machine take it). Between looking it up on the CRA website and telling it to my dad, we're convinced it's a scammer (No WAY a CRA person would have protocol THAT shitty). So, if he left his number on the message (or the one on the display is legit), we're likely going to report it to the CRA via the hotline they have set up.

That one is a very obvious scam. The CRA will never just call you about things like that. They will send you letters first to establish a document trail and maybe schedule an audit. Most of the time they will just disallow your deductions and after reassessing your tax return they will ask you to send them a cheque for the money you owe plus penalties. The CRA is notoriously lax about people who simply embelish their personal tax returns. They will reassess and charge penalties but actual prosecutions are rare. If you own a business or are an independent contractor, you might have more to worry since it's easier to screw yourself with an invalid tax return.

The scam relies on people not understanding how taxes really work and being deadly scared of the taxman because they fudged some deductions. I did tax preparation for three years and my sister used to work as a CRA auditor so I have very little fear of taxes.

 

[aegix drakan_v1legacy]

There used to be one that tried this shit repeatedly (every couple of days, occasionally more than once on the same day) for some reason. You would have thought they would move on since it clearly wasn't going to work but they kept this up for over a month.

Yeah, I hate that too. The microsoft scammers called me twice a day, then twice a week for a month solid one time. It's slowed down since then, thank god, but it was still ridiculous for a while. I don't know why they bothered.

They will send you letters first to establish a document trail and maybe schedule an audit. Most of the time they will just disallow your deductions and after reassessing your tax return they will ask you to send them a cheque for the money you owe plus penalties.

Yeah, I figured that's how it worked (especially after consulting the CRA website). Apparently these scammers also like to threaten jail time if you don't rely soon enough too.

It's fuckin' loopy.

 

[RedDeadFred]

Around tax season this year, I had several calls from people claiming to be from the CRA and saying that there was an arrest warrant out for me. Please call and pay the owed taxes and such. A lot of them had really fake sounding Russian accents. It's like they were trying to sound extra scary so that you'd panic and believe them.

 

[Nielas]

Around tax season this year, I had several calls from people claiming to be from the CRA and saying that there was an arrest warrant out for me. Please call and pay the owed taxes and such. A lot of them had really fake sounding Russian accents. It's like they were trying to sound extra scary so that you'd panic and believe them.

That is even sillier. If there really was an arrest warrant out for you, you would not be getting calls but a visit from the RCMP who would haul you off to jail. Criminal prosecutions for tax evasion are fairly rare in Canada and you have to really break the law for that. Most of the time the CRA is satisfied with you paying what you owe and might even settle for less than that. If you think that you are really in trouble with the CRA, get a tax lawyer.

 

[Denamic]

Someone has been trying to log into my ebay account 22 times since early may. I'm almost looking forward to the "need help signing into eBay?" emails I keep getting. I've literally nothing on my ebay account anyway.