Serial Killer 81: Post Apocalypse Survival (Cycle 4: Killer has been executed! SK 81 is over!)
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Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
What if I try to befriend the werewolf holding the mini gun?Wary Wolf said:Allow me to finish for you there Phats:
Essentially how boned you are.
I feel like the anti-porn jerks in that cult wouldn't mess with me if I had a werewolf holding a mini gun as a friend...
I'm not sure how to go about befriending a werewolf though. I could throw my Banhammer and let him try to bring it back but much like Mjolnir, only the worthy can pick up the Banhammer and I'm not sure he'd be able to. That might just make him mad and then I'll have an anti-porn cult AND a werewolf with a mini gun mad at me...
You could try to befriend a werewolf wielding a minigun, but that my friend is a Deathclaw.tippy2k2 said:
Essentially a 1000 pound irradiated iguana with an IQ of 200 and doesn't like the look of your face. With a minigun.
And you lot didn't want to get weapons.
As you take one last look around the vault that has been your home for the last months, you spot something underneath an old Nuka-Cola machine. Jackpot! A data cassette! Finally! There may be some worthwhile "reading material" on this!
With eager anticipation you hastily slam the cassette into your Pip-Boy 5000 and nearly have a heart attack as it begins to grind and load up the contents noisily. The last thing you need is everyone to catch on to what you are trying to do.
"Begin search for any files .jpg .png .bmp .gif" you mutter to the Pip-Boy under your breath. You needn't have bothered, as the Pip-Boy begins it's loud grinding noises once again. "Shut-up! Shut-up! Shut-up!" you desperately whisper to it.
Only one result? But it is an animated gif! Score!
"Display Result" your voice quavering in anticipation.
You stare at what you see in confusion. A thousand questions enter your mind. What does this mean? How does the tripping of some Moe robot girl correlate to the world ending? Is there something greater at play here? And most importantly: Can you fap to this?
With eager anticipation you hastily slam the cassette into your Pip-Boy 5000 and nearly have a heart attack as it begins to grind and load up the contents noisily. The last thing you need is everyone to catch on to what you are trying to do.
"Begin search for any files .jpg .png .bmp .gif" you mutter to the Pip-Boy under your breath. You needn't have bothered, as the Pip-Boy begins it's loud grinding noises once again. "Shut-up! Shut-up! Shut-up!" you desperately whisper to it.
[HEADING=1]ONE RESULT FOUND. ANIMATED GIF IN TACT[/HEADING]
Only one result? But it is an animated gif! Score!
"Display Result" your voice quavering in anticipation.
You stare at what you see in confusion. A thousand questions enter your mind. What does this mean? How does the tripping of some Moe robot girl correlate to the world ending? Is there something greater at play here? And most importantly: Can you fap to this?
There's a girl involved so check oneWary Wolf said:"Display Result" your voice quavering in anticipation.
You stare at what you see in confusion. A thousand questions enter your mind. What does this mean? How does the tripping of some Moe robot girl correlate to the world ending? Is there something greater at play here? And most importantly: Can you fap to this?
She's a robot according to Google when I looked it up so check two
She's actually one year old according to the Wiki....shit...ABORT ABORT ABORT!!!
So on the negative side, could not FAP but on the plus side, if she's a robot, that might explain the nuclear explosion and the apocalypse...
And I tried to Fap to this...my God....the anti-porn Cult was right all along!!! Where's my werewolf best friend? We've got some cleansing to do!
[HEADING=2]The Medic has managed to save someone(s) from being murdered![/HEADING]
Both the Medic and the saved person(s) have been told about the identify and role of the other. The Killer is selecting another target.[hr]
Both the Medic and the saved person(s) have been told about the identify and role of the other. The Killer is selecting another target.[hr]
You're just not using the right technique. They're easy once you get the hang of it.Wary Wolf said:Damn. You got me.
Still. The question becomes: Why do werewolves need miniguns?
LEGENDARY ALBINO RAD STAG WITH A TACTICAL NUKE LAUNCHER?!?
RUN! RUN NOW!
Whoo! I didn't get murdered! So I guess I can re-post this now...
"Damn. Now that I've joined you, does this mean I have to format all my flash drives?"
Deep within the irradiated wasteland, the great floating city of the Gritch King hovered in all it's splendor. Deep within it's halls Viral Wolf bowed to his great leader and stated:
"The humans are dead."
"Wait... So I'm a Trick baby?"
"The humans are dead."
"Uhhh... Good then?"Gritch said:
"But father..."Gritch said:
"What! That cannot be! It's impossible"Gritch said:
The Full Story of Viral Wolf's motherGritch said:
"Wait... So I'm a Trick baby?"
Viral Wolf dropped to his knees defeated. Offering no resistance, Viral Wolf was led away by Gritch King's minions.Gritch said:
A delivery from the Gritch King!
"Bah. I would rather pick your bones from my teeth than work with you naked monkeys, but I suppose I need you to survive... For now."
"Bah. I would rather pick your bones from my teeth than work with you naked monkeys, but I suppose I need you to survive... For now."
"Damn. Now that I've joined you, does this mean I have to format all my flash drives?"
Poor Aerosteam. But hey, at least the Medic actually saved a life. Top points for that.
Also, is it just me or is Wary Wolf playing a game all his own, with a plot more dense than Final Fantasy? His last post had a callback to a game from 9 months ago, for Pete's sake.
Also, is it just me or is Wary Wolf playing a game all his own, with a plot more dense than Final Fantasy? His last post had a callback to a game from 9 months ago, for Pete's sake.
Fair enough. It's more of a 20%-er gag for those who were playing at the time. TL;DR version is: I played as Holo and got shanked.Thunderous Cacophony said:
I'm not about to suggest that if you don't want to read my *ahem* "epic" posts don't read them, but if people do feel I'm taking away from the game by writing crap, I'll stop. It's just a fun thing I like to do. Although in the future I will mark my lengthy posts into a spoiler tag marked: "Inconsequential story asides" ;P
Why you complain anyway? Now you have chance for vengeance!
"Bring it on human!"
@Aerosteam:
F
I'm not complaining. I thoroughly enjoy the saga and effort you're putting it. I just also like that you took the RP ball and ran with it halfway around the world while the rest of us were getting our boots on.Wary Wolf said:
I for one appreciate the R&P, if for any other reason it opened my eyes to these heathens sinful pornographic ways.Wary Wolf said:
REPENT SINNERS! Burn the Porn on the Pile of Forgiveness and embrace the sinless life that God has called you too! All those who refuse to join our peaceful ways will be eliminated with extreme prejudice! REPENT!
PURGE AND PURIFY!!!
[HEADING=2]Aerosteam has been murdered! Begin the voting phase![/HEADING]
[user]Aerosteam[/user] has been murdered by a stray mini-nuke. These things happen. They had no role and have now become a Trickster. Woo hoo!
The Arbiter and any Tricksters roles may activate now.
Everyone has until Wednesday April 5 22:00 EST to cast their votes.[hr]Pardon the delay. Been busy at work today.
[user]Aerosteam[/user] has been murdered by a stray mini-nuke. These things happen. They had no role and have now become a Trickster. Woo hoo!
The Arbiter and any Tricksters roles may activate now.
Everyone has until Wednesday April 5 22:00 EST to cast their votes.[hr]Pardon the delay. Been busy at work today.
The group has been wandering the wasteland for a about a week now - about half of them without pants. Rations are all gone. People have taken to eating what little bit of shrubbery desperate cling to the arid land.
The lack of food has begun to play tricks on your mind. The other day you had an in-depth conversion about the eventual heat death of the universe with a particularly handsome piece of shrubbery. You decided to name him Jeremiah. The day after that you swear you saw a mini-nuke come from nowhere and hit [user]Aerosteam[/user].
Maybe? You've become conscious that reality and your perception of it aren't completely aligned - the thought would terrify you if you still had mental capacity for such emotions. Upon cresting a hill your greeted with an odd sight. Is that a person?
As the person draws closer you notice the two-headed cow to his left, a tall stack of miscellaneous items hang precariously from its back. To his right a large - well you're not really sure what it is - some sort of large humanoid lizard with a proportionally large minigun follows close to him. You shake your head. This must be another hallucination. You turn to your comrades only to find they too can hardly comprehend what they're seeing. Is this for real?
The man approaches the group while keeping a safe distance between both parties. "Howdy folks!" He flashes a grin while tipping his well worn Stetson. "Y'all folk lookin' like you could be in the need of some-" at this he glances downward toward the lack of pants among the group. "provisions. I've got all sorts of goods here. Be willin' to part with some if'n you'd be so disposed."
Someone in the group raises a question, "What would you want from us? We haven't anything like cash."
The man chuckles, "No I recon' ya don't. Not that fancy money means anything here on the wasteland. We take to barterin' out here. There is one commodity that's always in demand though." at this he draws something from his shirt.
Holy shit! It's a porno!
"If'n ya folks have any of these I'd be more to trade my goods for them. The boys back in town can't get enough of 'em."
"Give us a few moments to discuss this." The stranger gives an acknowledging nod and waits quietly.
The lack of food has begun to play tricks on your mind. The other day you had an in-depth conversion about the eventual heat death of the universe with a particularly handsome piece of shrubbery. You decided to name him Jeremiah. The day after that you swear you saw a mini-nuke come from nowhere and hit [user]Aerosteam[/user].
Maybe? You've become conscious that reality and your perception of it aren't completely aligned - the thought would terrify you if you still had mental capacity for such emotions. Upon cresting a hill your greeted with an odd sight. Is that a person?
As the person draws closer you notice the two-headed cow to his left, a tall stack of miscellaneous items hang precariously from its back. To his right a large - well you're not really sure what it is - some sort of large humanoid lizard with a proportionally large minigun follows close to him. You shake your head. This must be another hallucination. You turn to your comrades only to find they too can hardly comprehend what they're seeing. Is this for real?
The man approaches the group while keeping a safe distance between both parties. "Howdy folks!" He flashes a grin while tipping his well worn Stetson. "Y'all folk lookin' like you could be in the need of some-" at this he glances downward toward the lack of pants among the group. "provisions. I've got all sorts of goods here. Be willin' to part with some if'n you'd be so disposed."
Someone in the group raises a question, "What would you want from us? We haven't anything like cash."
The man chuckles, "No I recon' ya don't. Not that fancy money means anything here on the wasteland. We take to barterin' out here. There is one commodity that's always in demand though." at this he draws something from his shirt.
Holy shit! It's a porno!
"If'n ya folks have any of these I'd be more to trade my goods for them. The boys back in town can't get enough of 'em."
"Give us a few moments to discuss this." The stranger gives an acknowledging nod and waits quietly.
[HEADING=3](a)[/HEADING]
"Oh lord he's got food! And probably a few pair of pants. God do I miss my pants." he looks downward longingly, "We need to trade with him for supplies. We've got a surplus of handguns at least. Surely we can trade a few of those for some rations. And pants. God I miss my pants."[HEADING=3](b)[/HEADING]
Another comrade leans forward defiantly. "He makes a good point. We need supplies and we have a lot of guns. Why not just rob the guy? There's 15 of us and only one person and," he quickly peers over his shoulder toward the humanoid lizard, "an overgrown iguana. I'm sure we can take them!"[HEADING=3](c)[/HEADING]
Someone else rises a counterpoint. "Um, that's actually a werewolf not an iguana. And he's my friend." Someone is quick to point out the creature's lack of fur. "Nope definitely a werewolf. I'd know one when I see one. We should try to convince the man to give the poor werewolf to us."[HEADING=3](d)[/HEADING]
A final comrade steps toward, almost foaming at the mouth at this point. He howls out, "PORN! PORN! We must cleanse ourselves of this infidel! Burn him and his sordid wares!" It takes several people to hold the fanatic back from charging the caravan immediately.