Serial Killer Round 31 Game over. New round started.
- Thread starter elementsoul
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Where? *looks around*Gypsy ninja pirate zombie king said:
Also it's taking a long time for [insert executed person] to die. Should we add more explosions?
Okay a quick note here. There are way to many puns for me to make creative deaths for all of them. So instead of wasting that time I'm just going to do some quick deaths. I'll try to make them as painful as possible in the sentence or two that I will give each one.
@War Penguin *Find's your box and drops it own over top of you increasing the weight of it by a google (1 with one hundred zeros behind it) so that it literally crushes you into the Earth.
@Fragrance *kicks you into a pool of Mellow Yellow before turning it into a pool of Hydrochloric Acid that literally eats away your flesh before slowing dissolving your bones.*
@Gypse *Summons a metal baseball bat and beats your skull in making a fine mist of brain matter and blood.*
*Teleports self below your next spawn point with a spear. As you respawn I launch myself out of the ground thrusting the spear halfway inside of you before letting you slowly slide down the pole in a slow painful manner.*
*Waits for you to respawn while spinning around with a spartan shield on before slamming it into the back of your neck with enough force to put it halfway through your neck killing you in an instant.*
*Pulls out claymore and cuts off your legs then your arms when you respond so you quickly bleed out and die.*
*Takes a bicycle. Removes the pedals and replaces it with a motor. Strips the tire off of the rim. Starts the motor when you respawn and cuts you in half horizontally using the fast spinning bike rim.*
*Takes out giant dildo. Beats you to death with it GTA: San Andreas style when you respawn.*
*Spawns a potato gun and loads a potato into the gun. Fires the potato at you and watches as you get killed by a fucking potato. I mean like come on how sad is that?*
*Pulls out pistol and shoots you in the feet and watches as you bleed to death.*
*Spawns a tank over you and watches as it crushes you.*
*Injects you with super aids and waits for your slow but in comparison to normal aids quick death.*
*Orders my attack moose to trample you to death and watches the hilariousness as a moose charges you and runs over you.*
*Takes out shot gun and fire Dragon's Breath shells at you setting you on fire and burning you to death.*
*Makes an agreement a colony of beavers so that they attack you with their tails before gnawing off your shins, and finally adding you to their dam so that you drown to death.*
@War Penguin *Find's your box and drops it own over top of you increasing the weight of it by a google (1 with one hundred zeros behind it) so that it literally crushes you into the Earth.
@Fragrance *kicks you into a pool of Mellow Yellow before turning it into a pool of Hydrochloric Acid that literally eats away your flesh before slowing dissolving your bones.*
@Gypse *Summons a metal baseball bat and beats your skull in making a fine mist of brain matter and blood.*
*Teleports self below your next spawn point with a spear. As you respawn I launch myself out of the ground thrusting the spear halfway inside of you before letting you slowly slide down the pole in a slow painful manner.*
*Waits for you to respawn while spinning around with a spartan shield on before slamming it into the back of your neck with enough force to put it halfway through your neck killing you in an instant.*
*Pulls out claymore and cuts off your legs then your arms when you respond so you quickly bleed out and die.*
*Takes a bicycle. Removes the pedals and replaces it with a motor. Strips the tire off of the rim. Starts the motor when you respawn and cuts you in half horizontally using the fast spinning bike rim.*
*Takes out giant dildo. Beats you to death with it GTA: San Andreas style when you respawn.*
*Spawns a potato gun and loads a potato into the gun. Fires the potato at you and watches as you get killed by a fucking potato. I mean like come on how sad is that?*
*Pulls out pistol and shoots you in the feet and watches as you bleed to death.*
*Spawns a tank over you and watches as it crushes you.*
*Injects you with super aids and waits for your slow but in comparison to normal aids quick death.*
*Orders my attack moose to trample you to death and watches the hilariousness as a moose charges you and runs over you.*
*Takes out shot gun and fire Dragon's Breath shells at you setting you on fire and burning you to death.*
*Makes an agreement a colony of beavers so that they attack you with their tails before gnawing off your shins, and finally adding you to their dam so that you drown to death.*
@Omega WOOOHOOOOO *Rains Mountain Dew on all of Murderville*
@Element Fun fact; You didn't need to turn the Mello Yello into acid because Mello Yello already has an acid like effect on me! I'm probably going to regret telling everybody that though. I'll never pun again, I swear it!!
@Gypsy Wow. Glad I'm not you! Also things only get kinky in the thread when Skye starts punishing Smag....
@Element Fun fact; You didn't need to turn the Mello Yello into acid because Mello Yello already has an acid like effect on me! I'm probably going to regret telling everybody that though. I'll never pun again, I swear it!!
@Gypsy Wow. Glad I'm not you! Also things only get kinky in the thread when Skye starts punishing Smag....
NEWSFLASH: Mountain Dew rain falls, diabetes rises by 1000%.
MURDERVILLE, Aug 8 ? Yesterday saw an unprecedented rain consisting of Mountain Dew. Scientists are unable to clarify the reason behind this unusual event.
A local doctor has also since noted that cases of diabetes have reportedly risen by 1000%.
However, the authenticity of this doctor is in doubt, as this doctor is known not to have seen any patients for weeks now.
When asked about the event, Schizzy, Murderville's resident grumpy old man said, "Unprecendented, my ass! It's Fragrance's doing."
Reminded that Fragrance had been dead for a week, the nut job said, "That's how he's doing this. He's doing it from the JIB! He's pissin' Mountain Dew down from the JIB to spite me for that whole Yello Mello incident!"
The JIB, acronym for Jesus Infinite Buffet, is part of a local Murderville belief that people who die rise up to an buffet meal of infinite possibilities and quantities.
But this writer is inclined to believe the words of the crazy cat-man and recommends residents to call in the Ghostbusters at 555-2368.
MURDERVILLE, Aug 8 ? Yesterday saw an unprecedented rain consisting of Mountain Dew. Scientists are unable to clarify the reason behind this unusual event.
A local doctor has also since noted that cases of diabetes have reportedly risen by 1000%.
However, the authenticity of this doctor is in doubt, as this doctor is known not to have seen any patients for weeks now.
When asked about the event, Schizzy, Murderville's resident grumpy old man said, "Unprecendented, my ass! It's Fragrance's doing."
Reminded that Fragrance had been dead for a week, the nut job said, "That's how he's doing this. He's doing it from the JIB! He's pissin' Mountain Dew down from the JIB to spite me for that whole Yello Mello incident!"
The JIB, acronym for Jesus Infinite Buffet, is part of a local Murderville belief that people who die rise up to an buffet meal of infinite possibilities and quantities.
But this writer is inclined to believe the words of the crazy cat-man and recommends residents to call in the Ghostbusters at 555-2368.
" face looks like a Derp Face?
NEWS UPDATE: RainDew brings Bastard Ant invasion.
MURDERVILLE, Aug 8 ? What the residents of has been calling the RainDew, rain made of Mountain Dew, has brought on an invasion of ants.
The endless amount of caffeinated sugar has attracted the bugs. When asked about what species of ant they were, local pseudo-entomologist, j1-2themax, identified them as "THEM BASTARD ANTS ARE IN MY PANTS!".
Shortly after interviewing j1-2themax, this reporter espied resident Murderville punner, SteakHeart, being attacked by the caffeine fueled Bastard Ants. Local crazy cat-man, Schizzy, believed that he made a bad pun while playing in the RainDew within earshot of elementsoul.
This reporter suspects it has something to do with the bucket of sugar Schizzy dumped on SteakHeart.
As of this writing, the RainDew hasn't stopped raining.
MURDERVILLE, Aug 8 ? What the residents of has been calling the RainDew, rain made of Mountain Dew, has brought on an invasion of ants.
The endless amount of caffeinated sugar has attracted the bugs. When asked about what species of ant they were, local pseudo-entomologist, j1-2themax, identified them as "THEM BASTARD ANTS ARE IN MY PANTS!".
Shortly after interviewing j1-2themax, this reporter espied resident Murderville punner, SteakHeart, being attacked by the caffeine fueled Bastard Ants. Local crazy cat-man, Schizzy, believed that he made a bad pun while playing in the RainDew within earshot of elementsoul.
This reporter suspects it has something to do with the bucket of sugar Schizzy dumped on SteakHeart.
As of this writing, the RainDew hasn't stopped raining.
[HEADING=1]Fury has been executed and he was not the killer![/HEADING]
He messaged me that he was using different computer and that his was broken so don't expect a death anytime soon.
He messaged me that he was using different computer and that his was broken so don't expect a death anytime soon.
Omega walked outside his new Fortress of Dew. A person in a long trench coat was there, all the clothes obscuring everything from their gender to their height. "Ah, you must be the building inspector! Here to check out my new security system, I assume. Well, let me show you the new perks I added. It's all a little sticky due to the recent weather. Still, now my waterducts are now Mountain Dew-ducts, which is pretty awesome."
"To my left and right, you can see I added a nice little lava moat. The walkway is a little thin, so there is a bit of a risk of people falling in, and a particularly asshole-ish person might even push someone in very easily. Also, watch you step. There's a tripwire there, and it you activate it, a giant plate of spikes will fall right about where I'm standing. It's all up to code, but just be careful. Also, my auto-turrets have been installed, but that idiot electrician put the activation button about two feet from where you're standing. And the turrets haven't been registered to not fire at me, so pressing that button would end badly for me. And behind me, I've got a nice cage of angry chickens, ready to attack the first poor sap there is standing in front of them, which at the moment is me. The release mechanism is a second tripwire, close to the spikes. So, shall we begin the inspection?"
After that, the person pulled out a pistol and shot Omega in the back of the head. He fell over, landing right in the middle of the bridge between the lava moat. As his ghostly form rose up, heading to the buffet in the sky, he looked around. "Wow... that was a little anti-climactic..."
"To my left and right, you can see I added a nice little lava moat. The walkway is a little thin, so there is a bit of a risk of people falling in, and a particularly asshole-ish person might even push someone in very easily. Also, watch you step. There's a tripwire there, and it you activate it, a giant plate of spikes will fall right about where I'm standing. It's all up to code, but just be careful. Also, my auto-turrets have been installed, but that idiot electrician put the activation button about two feet from where you're standing. And the turrets haven't been registered to not fire at me, so pressing that button would end badly for me. And behind me, I've got a nice cage of angry chickens, ready to attack the first poor sap there is standing in front of them, which at the moment is me. The release mechanism is a second tripwire, close to the spikes. So, shall we begin the inspection?"
After that, the person pulled out a pistol and shot Omega in the back of the head. He fell over, landing right in the middle of the bridge between the lava moat. As his ghostly form rose up, heading to the buffet in the sky, he looked around. "Wow... that was a little anti-climactic..."