"...I've come to talk with you again..." I mutter, singing along with the song quietly.
Someone knocks on the door. I pick up a candle to go with my nightshirt, Scrooge style. "Who's there?" I ask, hand on the latch.
"ANGRY MOB!" the angry mob yells.
"Come in, wipe your feet on the mat." I open the door.
The mob slowly walks in, wipe their feet and follow me into the living room.
"So... you... did the kill... thing... sorry, can you cross your legs?" one of the figures asks.
"No." I spread my legs wider.
"I'd find you in contempt of court if this were a court, and I were a judge and we had a logical legal system with due process."
"Meh. I'm down for a good mob killing." I say off-handedly.
The fish-bowl next to me is pushed to the ground by a stray pitchfork.
"Oh for f- I'll have to... God dammit." I curse.
"Can we get back on topic? Where were you on the night of RaNDM's death?"
"Here."
"And hobo?"
"Here."
"And Neo?"
"Here."
"You don't get out much. That's a bit suspicious."
"If I say 'I was walking around town', you'd say 'So, you spend a lot of time walking. That's a bit suspicious."
"True... Okay, I think we have enough evidence now."
"Not really, but go on."
A large figure walks out of the crowd, holding a chainsaw.
"Did you really need the mob?"
"Yes. It's for effect. And so we can spread the guilt."
The figure revs the chainsaw.
"Fair enough."
"Any last words?"
"Yes. Jak, you're cleaning the mess up."
The chainsaw shreds through my abdomen, then rips up through my chest, neck and head.
It makes a horrific mess.
The mob is played out by the Sounds of Silence.