Should I quit my job?

[Weaver]

A little about me; I'm 25 years old I have a degree in computer science and I currently work doing builds (aka, the shittiest part of programming) for a big, multinational health science corporation.

As the title states, I'm wondering if I should quit my job. I kind of feel guilty even asking this in this economic climate where there are people who would do anything just to get some cash. And this is what some people would call a good job, too. The pay is alright, I have benefits, it's not TOO far from my apartment and it's afforded me a relatively comfortable level of living.

Except that I hate it.

I hate waking up, I hate the kind of work they're making me do. I feel undervalue, underused and I feel that my university degree from the best math, engineering and CS school in my country that I spent 5 years and $40,000 to get is completely going to waste here.

I'm not challenged and any time I ask to switch my role or get more responsibility is essentially met with "let's just wait and see" or "We'll fix this one build process problem, then we'll talk". It keeps happening over and over and I'm going nuts.

The environment here is grey. The floors, the walls, the ceiling, the kitchen, the food carts; everything is fucking grey or beige. We got bought out about 8 months ago and there was so much change in the air initially, but nothing has changed. They only about a month ago started looking at designers to renovate the office. It destroys my soul, drive and motivation just being in this building.

When I get home I'm just exhausted. I feel like this for wasting all day at a worthless job, doing banal (but demanding) work and I'm entirely drained. "A great time to job search!" you might say. However, I'm just so tired and down on myself I can't even focus enough to write a cover letter. I usually just spend most of my nights in escapism; mainly watching youtube or movies. I rarely even have the energy to play a video game any more.

From reading this you'll probably figure, "Well, it's obvious you hate it, so just quit!" This is something I struggle with daily. I do hate it, I do want to quit; despite my trepidation about job hunting I've HAD interviews with other companies (currently doing Microsoft rounds) but I have bills to pay, I bought a car in November that needs to be paid off. My rent is rather high and I gotta eat and have electricity (and internet).

I guess I'll stop prattling on, if you were in my position (or have been in my position) would you quit? It's worth noting I have about $14,000 in the bank which should carry me for probably half a year.

I guess I just want advice.

 

[Girl With One Eye]

Honestly everyone hates their job, that's why they have to pay you to do it. I've done both telesales and door to door sales so I know exactly what a crummy job feels like. But if you have a job its easier to interest future employers than if you are unemployed. So my advice would be to stick with your current job and apply for others at the same time. It is a pain in the ass but if you can set yourself a target, like doing one decent application a day it will be easier.

 

[Weaver]

Honestly everyone hates their job, that's why they have to pay you to do it. I've done both telesales and door to door sales so I know exactly what a crummy job feels like. But if you have a job its easier to interest future employers than if you are unemployed. So my advice would be to stick with your current job and apply for others at the same time. It is a pain in the ass but if you can set yourself a target, like doing one decent application a day it will be easier.

The thing is, it's not entirely true in my case. I don't know how well you know the software industry but "build master" (my current role) is synonymous with "not good enough for us".

I also don't believe everyone hates their job; this is a mentality that just has to go. I believe it's a poison that has infected the working population "life sucks, work sucks but I gotta do it!" What's the point? If life isn't worth living, there's no worth to being alive.

In the past I have worked at a grocery store, two software companies (one massive one, which was my best job ever; one smaller one which was my worst job ever. Even worse than this.), two start-up software companies (one I made with an ex-coworker and one with a professor and a colleague at university), and at a school board doing web design.

All of those jobs save for the one I labelled my worst job ever, even working at a grocery store as a whipping boy in high school was somehow better than this hell. A lot of it really boils down to the how mundane the work is. I have written software that the Indian Navy uses for their RFID readers. THAT was a cool job. that was hard, challenging and rewarding. I ENJOYED that job. The only reason I left was because it was a university co-op job (I did three terms there). After I graduated they got purchased and put into a hiring freeze so they couldn't hire me on.

Sorry for the bracket filled, sprawling mess of a post.

edit:
Sorry I got carried away.

Your advice is sound I feel. I SHOULD be applying to more jobs, but like I said it's very difficult to even bring myself to do that. I've gone past the point of angry "I got to get out of here" into the deep pits of depression. I don't taste my food, I don't enjoy recreational activities I used to, I sleep incredibly poorly. I just exist drifting from day to day only half aware of whatever is happening.

What I might do is quit; but set a long target. Tell my boss I will be leaving at the beginning of September. This would put a fire under my ass, give me a light at the end of the tunnel and hopefully motivate me. It's a huge risk, but I'm not sure I care any more

 

[Rylot]

I really wouldn't quit until you have another one lined up. The worst job is still better than starving. As for cooping with your current one could you possibly do some programing on the side? I know fuck all about this kind of stuff but maybe you could find a challenging project to create on your own time. It also might be something to show future employers? Maybe it doesn't work that way.

As for hating your work space; can you decorate your work space? Just something to get you through the day?

Also from your post it sounds like maybe you don't do many social things outside of work. Maybe finding a social hobby would help take the stress out of work? Hopefully you wind doing something you enjoy but every has to work a job to pay the bills at some point.

 

[mikecoulter]

Honestly everyone hates their job, that's why they have to pay you to do it. I've done both telesales and door to door sales so I know exactly what a crummy job feels like. But if you have a job its easier to interest future employers than if you are unemployed. So my advice would be to stick with your current job and apply for others at the same time. It is a pain in the ass but if you can set yourself a target, like doing one decent application a day it will be easier.

The thing is, it's not entirely true in my case. I don't know how well you know the software industry but "build master" (my current role) is synonymous with "not good enough for us".

I also don't believe everyone hates their job; this is a mentality that just has to go. I believe it's a poison that has infected the working population "life sucks, work sucks but I gotta do it!" What's the point? If life isn't worth living, there's no worth to being alive.

In the past I have worked at a grocery store, two software companies (one massive one, which was my best job ever; one smaller one which was my worst job ever. Even worse than this.), two start-up software companies (one I made with an ex-coworker and one with a professor and a colleague at university), and at a school board doing web design.

All of those jobs save for the one I labelled my worst job ever, even working at a grocery store as a whipping boy in high school was somehow better than this hell. A lot of it really boils down to the how mundane the work is. I have written software that the Indian Navy uses for their RFID readers. THAT was a cool job. that was hard, challenging and rewarding. I ENJOYED that job. The only reason I left was because it was a university co-op job (I did three terms there). After I graduated they got purchased and put into a hiring freeze so they couldn't hire me on.

Sorry for the bracket filled, sprawling mess of a post.

edit:
Sorry I got carried away.

Your advice is sound I feel. I SHOULD be applying to more jobs, but like I said it's very difficult to even bring myself to do that. I've gone past the point of angry "I got to get out of here" into the deep pits of depression. I don't taste my food, I don't enjoy recreational activities I used to, I sleep incredibly poorly. I just exist drifting from day to day only half aware of whatever is happening.

What I might do is quit; but set a long target. Tell my boss I will be leaving at the beginning of September. This would put a fire under my ass, give me a light at the end of the tunnel and hopefully motivate me. It's a huge risk, but I'm not sure I care any more

That could also cause him to offer you another position! Worth having a go.

 

[Weaver]

I really wouldn't quit until you have another one lined up. The worst job is still better than starving. As for cooping with your current one could you possibly do some programing on the side? I know fuck all about this kind of stuff but maybe you could find a challenging project to create on your own time. It also might be something to show future employers? Maybe it doesn't work that way.

As for hating your work space; can you decorate your work space? Just something to get you through the day?

Also from your post it sounds like maybe you don't do many social things outside of work. Maybe finding a social hobby would help take the stress out of work? Hopefully you wind doing something you enjoy but every has to work a job to pay the bills at some point.

I can program on the side, yeah

I actually do! I started a project on the weekend and I have another one me and my roommate are working on (slowly) at home. The difficulty is my own mindset. I constantly tell myself to just nut up and do it. I hype myself up every day "today I'm going to go home and just go full Leeroy Jenkins at this project" but it's just so damn difficult to keep that motivation.

I question myself constantly about what's wrong with me and why I can't find the motivation, but I think the answer is kind of evident. I spend, minimum, 8 hours a day (usually more like 10) hacking away at a computer. I drive home in rush hour, bullshit level traffic (which is stressful to me), I get home, I cook dinner and I try my best to go to the gym (I've seen what a sedentary lifestyle can do to the body). After that, I have very few free hours left in the day. I somehow convince myself that I've earned the right to relax before bed and just not do any more work for the rest of the day.

I constantly wonder how I convince myself to procrastinate like this every night, and regret it every morning; but I keep doing it. At the time it makes sense. As much as I love working on my projects (which is usually reserved for a few hours on Saturday at this point) programming things is still work, and it's still mentally taxing. I love figuring out the hard problems and making stuff work but it's a tiring job. Even now reading back on what I just wrote I think "man I'm a lazy asshole" but ask me at 9pm if I feel like starting up a home project and I already know the answer I'll give.

Decorating my workspace is a good idea. I was actually thinking of ordering some video game and anime posters. Safe for work stuff; if other people don't like it then can eat a dick as far as I'm concerned. The downside is it's surprisingly expensive to ship and order a poster. The only decoration I have now is a small stuffed sheep I bought around Easter time cause I thought it was cute (and it totally is).

As for social activities; yeah I don't get out a lot. I don't know what to really do about that to be honest. I had a sizeable group of friends in university (well, sizaeable for a computer science nerd ), but we're all split up over the globe now. A few remain in the city and we certainly spend time on the weekends together doing stuff; of course this is time taken away from working on potential projects

----------------------

As a complete aside, I want to sincerely thank anyone who replied and read my post at all. It actually feels good to just talk about this.

 

[Rylot]

snip

Well that sucks that it drains you even more to program after work. Seems like you need to find some way to release your stress from work. An activity or hobby that isn't taxing and just lets you escape for awhile. Reading, writing, drawing, painting, learning an instrument, dressing in spandex and roaming the city for evil doers, yoga, horticulture are some pretty good ways to wind down after a long day.

 

[dimensional]

I can sympathise to an extent I was in a similar situation 2 years ago I really really hated my job I did it well and got good pay but I couldnt stand it in the end I resigned and have never regretted it. That said I saved like a twat before hand and havent had a full time job since (by choice) I now do self study a lot as in at least 6 hours a day every day (except thursdays and fridays when I have a part time job) so I dont dick about I also fulfilled an ambition of mine by walking the length of the mainland UK which was awesome.

In short I would say lifes too short to spend miserable but you have to be practical look at the situation weigh up the pros and cons yourself and then make the decision no-one can do that for you.

 

[ThriKreen]

The only thing I could suggest is reduce the gym time and alternate with whatever side project excites you, with the purpose that it's only a short term thing until you can get out of your dreary job. Hopefully you'll land a better job that motivates you, then resume your previous gym schedule.

Basically do the short term sacrifice for the long term goal.

 

[Batou667]

Well, OP, sounds to me like you've already made the decision to quit your job and are now trying, post-hoc, to justify it.

Sometimes you've just got to follow your heart, or your gut, or your dreams or whatever - not just the promise of a stable job and the warm rut of mediocrity. Life really is too precious to squander doing something you hate. You say you have savings which would allow you to take a few months' break and look for work. Awesome, sounds like a plan; do it. It sounds like right now you don't have the mental energies or inspiration to motivate yourself. Take some time out, "center" yourself, smell the roses. Play some xbox, have some beers with your friends, hit the gym a bit more. Sure, you won't have the regular paycheck, but you'll have traded it for mental clarity and a leaner, hungrier attitude toward job-hunting.

Those are the key phrases, by the way: hunger and hunting. You're currently in a "livestock" mindset. You want to develop a "predator" mindset.

Good luck dude!

 

[bluepilot]

Do not quit your job yet but do start looking for a new one.

In the meantime, fill up your work space with My Little Pony toys or action figures or whatever floats your boat. Try to spend as much time away from work as possible, follow the contract to every single line, and hang out with friends whenever you can.

Try to organize some fun events at work too. You are probably not the only one who feels depressed in that environment. Find a like-minded individual and become proactive in brightening up the office environment. If you get into trouble, well, there is nothing in your contract about NOT doing it, right?

 

[zelda2fanboy]

Quit. You want to quit, you say you want to quit, so quit. Ignore the people saying "find another job first." You can't look for jobs part time. I quit my shitty job that I held for four years two weeks ago. I immediately felt great. The next week, I went about job searching like its own full time job, filling out online apps, while hitting up unemployment and local job agencies. Then last week, I got another job. And you know what? It sucked ass. And you know what I did? I fucking quit that, too. (By the way, bachelors degree in business.)

I noticed something from the last job I quit and it was true of the job I held before that, too. For this particular job, I rolled out of bed from a phone call the day after visiting an employment agency. I drove to the packing plant and found out I'd be "palletizing." This meant in this situation that I'd be hunched over a pallet of baby food, cutting the plastic off, and placing the cases on a conveyor to be repackaged into variety packs. The people putting the baby food into the boxes were all women, who obviously had never ever done what I was doing that day. My back was on fire and I knew I was destined for permanent injury if I kept at it. There was an older Mexican guy next to me doing the same job in the exact same way. He spoke Spanish, but I could tell everyone thought he was funny and they all knew his name.

I learned something that day. If I'm doing a job that no one else wants to do, I try really hard at it, do it well, make friends, and everyone likes me, then I'll get to do that crappy job forever. There's no moving up from the bottom. It's a myth. The dishwasher is never going to own the restaurant. You can move up from the middle. You can even move up from what appears to be the top. But if you're hunched over shining shoes looking like a pathetic piece of garbage, people will always treat you that way. They can't help it, and not only that, they'll advise you on how to do it properly, even though they never did it themselves. Because after all, you're an idiot who shines shoes. You're clearly too dumb to know how to do it right.

 

[Weaver]

Well, OP, sounds to me like you've already made the decision to quit your job and are now trying, post-hoc, to justify it.

Sometimes you've just got to follow your heart, or your gut, or your dreams or whatever - not just the promise of a stable job and the warm rut of mediocrity. Life really is too precious to squander doing something you hate. You say you have savings which would allow you to take a few months' break and look for work. Awesome, sounds like a plan; do it. It sounds like right now you don't have the mental energies or inspiration to motivate yourself. Take some time out, "center" yourself, smell the roses. Play some xbox, have some beers with your friends, hit the gym a bit more. Sure, you won't have the regular paycheck, but you'll have traded it for mental clarity and a leaner, hungrier attitude toward job-hunting.

Those are the key phrases, by the way: hunger and hunting. You're currently in a "livestock" mindset. You want to develop a "predator" mindset.

Good luck dude!

Thanks for the reply!
I know it's my confirmation bias at this point, but it's good to know others out there think the same way. It's scary when push comes to shove but I'm relatively certain this is the right thing to do. I talked over finances with my roommate and he's not worried about the bills. My parents will undoubtedly think this is a bad idea but hey, it's not like I live with them any more. I have a 2 hour meeting with my manager today (we're doing some planning) and I think I'll bring it up then.

Quit. You want to quit, you say you want to quit, so quit. Ignore the people saying "find another job first." You can't look for jobs part time. I quit my shitty job that I held for four years two weeks ago. I immediately felt great. .

I'm glad you got out. I was hoping someone would post something like this; where they finally cast off their terrible job and just felt better for it.

Nietzsche once wrote "No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself" and I'd like to think he was right.

 

[Etni]

In your position, I'd learn how to live with a little less money - just in case - so that $14k would last for a year or so. And if you think you can handle it, you could save up some more. Either way, at some point quit and start looking for something more enjoyable. Life's too short to be spent just being miserable.

Since you already have landed your current job, I'd guess you can find another one as well. A year should be plenty for that - just keep your eyes open, and keep active. Don't let the unemployment make you passive like it does to some people. And you'll be fine.

 

[Beldaros]

snip

Tricky... First of all, not everyone hates their job. I love my job.

It's possible I missed it, but what country do you live in. That may impact your decision, thought realistically it shouldn't.

I am a true believer in quitting something that is making you miserable and my advice is to quit.

However, make sure you save enough money to survive for six months or more without paid work (just in case) if you can freelance on the side as well, that can help you financially. Make sure you don't leave yourself with nothing though.

Do you have family? A mortgage? Student loans? A car? Other responsibilities... you have to consider all these things before quitting. Given your age, I would suggest it is a good time to find more work and with a degree (not as useful as you'd think these days) and experience you should be desirable in certain fields. Is the job you want to have in any way related to your current job?

Quitting work isn't an easy choice and if you make the choice, you have to work your ass off to get a new job, and you may have to sacrifice more time to a job you aren't happy doing to rack up experience.

A job that's making you miserable is not something to hold onto if you don't have too many responsibilities, if you do though... well you may have to suck it up while looking (secretly) for other work. Depends very much on your current situation.