Should the partner be present during childbirth?

[manic_depressive13]

Sorry to throw another child-related thread onto the pile, but someone's post in another thread made me curious about this, SO:

If you were to give birth, would you want your partner present?

Otherwise, would you want to be there to support your partner while they give birth?

My answer: If I were ever in that situation I definitely wouldn't want my partner watching me shit myself and seeing my vagina getting ripped open as a result of pushing out a small person. I can't imagine any emotional support he could possibly offer that would make up for the shame I would feel if he saw that.

 

[BlueberryMUNCH]

Normally, I think they should at least be outside the theater (if the're squeamish) and if not...yeah, they should be present. I'd like to be there at least, anyway.

That said, if you've got a football match to play versus Chelsea...you shouldn't bother. Just play the match and dash back.
[sub][sub]C'mon Bale, how could you:'( haha. I kid, of course.[/sub][/sub]

 

[Kopikatsu]

"It all began on the day of my actual birth. Both of my parents failed to show up."

Anyway, both should be there barring something ridiculous. It might be a bit...gross in concept, but childbirth is something that's been done quadrillions of times. No need to flip out over it. Like the defecating thing. That's so that the baby will be infected with the bacteria from the feces, which lets them duplicate it for their own colon bacteria and such. Without that, they'll grow up with weakened immune systems and other various problems.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

If I'm bringing a new life into the world, I want to be there for my partner and for the moment. It might be an incredibly common event, what with babies coming up everywhere, everyday, but my baby is going to only happen once so I wouldn't miss it for the world. Something rather dire would have to keep me from the side of that hospital bed.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Sorry to throw another child-related thread onto the pile, but someone's post in another thread made me curious about this, SO:

If you are a woman and you were to give birth, would you want your partner present?

If you are a man, would you want to be there to support your partner while she gives birth?

My answer: If I were ever in that situation I definitely wouldn't want my partner watching me shit myself and seeing my vagina getting ripped open as a result of pushing out a small person. I can't imagine any emotional support he could possibly offer that would make up for the shame I would feel if he saw that.

I don't mean to invade your privacy, but in the making of said baby, did your partner not already see your vagina?
Not ripped open of course (or at least I really hope so) but it's really nothing to be ashamed of at that point, plus I would venture that, at that exact moment, your mind will be occupied with more important matters than "Oh God, he can see my vagina",

INAPPROPRIATE JOKE WARNING
mainly along the lines of
"OH GOD THIS HURTS, LET THIS BE OVER FAST, PLEASE"

+ He could just stay by your side and you know, concentrate on holding your hand, looking you in the eyes, telling you everything is going to be okay instead of focussing exclusively on your nether-regions and let the doctors and nurses do their jobs.
Just a suggestion....

Personally?
In the highly unlikely event of ever siring a child, I would want to be there for my partner when she gives birth.
I would want to focus on her upper regions, though, just as I described.

EDIT: Holy Hell, we just keep running into each other today.

 

[bluepilot]

The father of my children will wait outside the delivery room sweating, shaking, and chain smoking like a normal person.

Plus he will not look down their until the stiches have healed.

I think that this makes for a happier marriage.

 

[Keoul]

The woman is pushing a baby through her vagina, that's like a melon through a hole the size of a lime.
Man up and be there cause damn she needs a hand to crush and that hand better be yours

 

[Guffe]

Well as a guy I'd like to go.
If someone doesn't want their partner there or the partner doesn't want to go they shouldn't be made to go. So respect the others decision and if your opinions differ then discus it
Not everyone wants to see the shitstorm that happens during labour.

 

[Hagi]

If given the choice I'd rather be there. I think it'd be amazing to experience the first few moments of your own child's life.

That being said, I'd have no big issue if due to circumstances of whatever nature I couldn't be there or it'd be better for my partner and/or child if I wasn't.

Childbirth isn't always easy and should there be any complications there's a chance I'd only be in the way by being there, in which case I'll make myself scarce until I can be of use. The most important thing then is the health of my family and I doubt I'll suffer any serious injuries by not being there at the time of birth.

 

[Palademon]

I'm glad that so far the expectations of women are that the man should wait outside, because I'm squeamish.

I would like to be there just to be supportive and not seem like an uncaring ass.

 

[Beffudled Sheep_v1legacy]

As a man I would like to see the birth of my child up close. I've seen child birth before so I won't be squicked out by it adn I've seen enough blood and gore in real life to have the "nasty" bits bother me at all.

 

[Shadowstar38]

Not really. I mean, if he doesn't want to be in there, fuck it. Watching a baby be born is some sick shit.

 

[purf]

Been there, done that.
And I was kind of around the corner from the "lower regions" for the most part of the 14-ish hours, sitting by her side. So, that's that. Eventually a c-section was made, under general anaesthetic, so I didn't witness the very first second of my daughter being out in the world, but I estimate it was maybe the 5th. Awesome stuff

 

[game-lover]

On the off chance I ever gain the desire for children, I think I'd like my partner there. Especially when I get all screaming and crying and panicky at times.

Because I am a wuss about pain. And you can't always get your lovely drugs in time.

 

[Something Amyss]

Speaking in general, it should be up to the people involved.

If you are a woman and you were to give birth, would you want your partner present?

If you are a man, would you want to be there to support your partner while she gives birth?

What if you're trans and fall outside certain constructs here? >.>

I don't mean to invade your privacy, but in the making of said baby, did your partner not already see your vagina?

Maybe they did it in the dark. or through a hole in the sheet.

But seriously, she was specific in the whole "shitting myself and seeing my vagina ripped open." I know in the next line you mention that, but then you go back to treating it as though it's just about seeing her vagina.

Some people don't even feel comfortable being around people when they have to use the bathroom. Imagine the feeling when the head that's being crammed out of your crotch is also ripping it up.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Speaking in general, it should be up to the people involved.

If you are a woman and you were to give birth, would you want your partner present?

If you are a man, would you want to be there to support your partner while she gives birth?

What if you're trans and fall outside certain constructs here? >.>

I don't mean to invade your privacy, but in the making of said baby, did your partner not already see your vagina?

Maybe they did it in the dark. or through a hole in the sheet.

But seriously, she was specific in the whole "shitting myself and seeing my vagina ripped open." I know in the next line you mention that, but then you go back to treating it as though it's just about seeing her vagina.

Some people don't even feel comfortable being around people when they have to use the bathroom. Imagine the feeling when the head that's being crammed out of your crotch is also ripping it up.

Well, I do trust you read my post in it's entirety?
Because for all my quips, I made a sensible suggestion as to how one could go about approaching said issue:

+ He could just stay by your side and you know, concentrate on holding your hand, looking you in the eyes, telling you everything is going to be okay instead of focussing exclusively on your nether-regions and let the doctors and nurses do their jobs.
Just a suggestion....

That one?
The one that would solve the problem with the partner seeing stuff she is not comfortable with whilst still being able to support her?



Also: If you are trans, you can either still give birth, if you still possess the necessary equipment or still father a child, again, given that you still possess the necessary equipment. If you lack the equipment AND the possibility of using a surrogate mother, well the question simply does not apply to you.

Also, which construct do you refer to?
The "partner"?

IF you are trans AND your partner is pregnant, WOULD you want to be there?

IF you are trans AND you are pregnant, WOULD you want your partner to be there?
Happy now?

That easy.

 

[manic_depressive13]

some even experience an orgasm during childbirth.

I find that sincerely hard to believe but if it were true and it happened to me, I would be absolutely horrified. That would essentially be your child giving you an orgasm.

Besides, having an orgasm isn't strictly "doesn't matter had sex". People can have orgasms when getting raped too.

What if you're trans and fall outside certain constructs here? >.>

Fixed! (I think)

 

[Verlander]

I've been off these boards for a few months now, and I forgot how many trans/asexual people there were on here! Guys, don't take it as a personal insult when you're not specifically alluded to... people don't have the time to list every single situation in the world!

My fiancé has 3 kids already, and their dad was present, so she doesn't care. If we had one then, you'd think that it'd be my choice... but it isn't! This is a situation that has to be agreed by both parties, and whatever an individual feels isn't what would ultimately happen in the experience. People make concessions for those that they love, one way or another.

Genuinely, selfish me? Yeah, course. It's my kid man, and frankly I'd like to be on hand to give assistance if needed.