So angry I could beat my fists to bloody pulp against the walls.

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Mushroom Camper
Sep 30, 2009
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I'm fucking mad. Moreso than I've ever felt before.

My stupid ex. We broke up last weekend after some argument that she caused, but over the week we've been talking and reconciling. Yesterday she phoned me up. It was an emergency. Her cat had jumped out her window which is three stories up. Cat had smashed all it's teeth out on the pavement and had to go to the vets. She didn't have any money and was in a state, distressed and crying that her cat was going to die. I offered to help out even though I don't have any money myself and she promised to pay me back today since it's her pay day.

We took the cat to the vets, cost me ever penny I had. Meanwhile the two of us finished talking and decided to get back together. Next day she's phoning me up, saying she hasn't been paid. I'm pissed off of course and tell her that helping her out has left me completely broke. I've got no food, no way of getting any money and no one to help me out. She counters with the fact that I'm being selfish and not supportive of her condition (bi-polar). Fucking outrageous. Anyway she hangs up on me.

So I go to her facebook page, knowing that when shes suffering from her bi-polar she writes a hell of a lot of shit on there and I find a conversation between her and one of her friends about how things are going with her new man. So she's been cheating on me as well.

Knowing that I think back to things shes said, all the evidence point to the fact that she was with some other bloke as well. So she's been cheating on me with two guys, stolen every penny I have and done it all by taken advantage of my good nature. And when I confronted her with this she said, with total sincerity, "so what, we've only been going out a week"

WTF, We've been together for nearly five years. We were engaged. I'm in the process of getting a house for us both.

I'm so angry and betrayed it feels like it's going to overwhelm me.

I don't know what to do.
 

JoJo

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aaronobst said:
I find the best solution is to not bother with relationships and wank instead. If you must get some poontang visit a prostitute
You do realise this is for serious advice, right?

OT: OP, it might be best to cut your losses and break up with this woman. From what you've written it sounds like she isn't a good long-term partner, I think you should get your money back and then leave. There are plenty of reasonable women out there for you. In the end it's a decision only you can make, you could try to make things up again but you have to consider that it might be for the best to let her be.
 

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Mushroom Camper
Sep 30, 2009
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Thanks guys for the serious responces. I'm feeling a little better now. Kind of crashed and blue. Defo over between us. I can put up with a lot from her because I love her, but she's gone to far. It's kind of scary being single again after so many years.
 
Feb 7, 2009
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Women'll do that to you. Believe me, I know. You just gotta end it and continue the search (after getting your money back, of course).
 

endnuen

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Sep 20, 2010
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You know what you do when you get gangrene ? you cut it the fuck off.
She is just that, gangrene.

Also, for the anger part, go burn it off on the road. Run 5 miles and you'll feel better.

And now is also the best time to get back in touch with your bros whom you without a doubt have been neglecting somewhat while being with that girl.
 

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Mushroom Camper
Sep 30, 2009
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aaronobst said:
Djinn8 said:
Thanks guys for the serious responces. I'm feeling a little better now. Kind of crashed and blue. Defo over between us. I can put up with a lot from her because I love her, but she's gone to far. It's kind of scary being single again after so many years.
You'll acclimatise man. I got fucked over crazy by my old girlfriend, that was 6 years ago and haven't bothered since... Women I tell ya; manipulative witches




Also hows the cat? considering the bill you payed
The cat's alright. It smashed all its teeth out, but the vet took out the shards and gave it some jabs to stop the infection.

Just been around to my mates house. Trying to organise a night, get some birds round. As a great man once said "the best way to get over someone you love, is get into someone you don't"
 

SiskoBlue

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Aug 11, 2010
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EMERGENCY EXIT IS TO YOUR LEFT!! TAKE IT!!!

Seriously, if I have one rule in life it's stay away from nutjob users. She will bleed you dry emotionally, finacially and spiritually. I'm just hoping you're not one of those emotional masochists who tries prove how tough they are by "loving" the craziest unlovable psycho they can find.

Also being bi-polar does not make you poor, a cheater, or a bad debtor. That's all her.
 

Nickolai77

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Apr 3, 2009
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That's a rough ride you've been on, you have my sympathies OP.

Still, i don't think dating a bi-polar woman was a good idea from day one, be glad that you've got out of it, and, if possible, get your money back. She doesn't respect you so your under no obligation to respect her. (She's pretty stupid as well, if she's forgotten that you have access to her facebook)

Anyway, i like the idea of you and your mates throwing a party and having some women around. It will make some good therapy.
 

dmase

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Mar 12, 2009
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Seriously bro just bust your knuckles up. They won't look the same again, you'll feel it for the next month it will be hard to move but goddamn there is something about looking down and saying I feel something thats soothing.

She isn't worth the grief the physical pain yes leave it and remember this for next time. Trusting someone like that isn't smart in my opinion, I know I won't and your gonna have to do some soul searching to figure out if you wanna worry about that any time soon. Just remember she's fucking crazy so was my girl its not your fault its her fault for not controlling herself.
 

Gotterdammerung

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Jan 13, 2011
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Go out with a bunch of (single) friends, get smashed, and wake up the next day feeling a lot better about yourself. It's what I do when I get dropped.

But, whatever you do, don't get obsessed with the break-up. Avoid her for a while, and if you do have to see her, keep it curt, polite and short. Maybe the rift between you will heal, maybe not.

Anyway, by the sounds of it, she sounds like the kind of person that, if you went back to her, would just string you around again and bleed you dry, so don't even bother with it.

Well, that's all I've got.
 

zombiesinc

One day, we'll wake the zombies
Mar 29, 2010
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Djinn8 said:
Next day she's phoning me up, saying she hasn't been paid.
This is the sort of possibility you have to consider when deciding whether or not to lend someone money. She's in the wrong, calling you selfish and all, but you didn't really leave yourself in a position to help yourself out.

I'm pissed off of course and tell her that helping her out has left me completely broke. I've got no food, no way of getting any money and no one to help me out.
Why in the world would you give her all your money when you didn't have any (or very little) food, and wouldn't have any money to buy some if you ran out? Of course it's frustrating, but you can't fully put the blame on her, you're a grown man, you made your decision.

So she's been cheating on me with two guys, stolen every penny I have and done it all by taken advantage of my good nature. And when I confronted her with this she said, with total sincerity, "so what, we've only been going out a week"

WTF, We've been together for nearly five years. We were engaged. I'm in the process of getting a house for us both.
I know how frustrating it feels to learn that your ex has started dating someone else shortly after a break-up, but it happens. Sometimes it's a genuine thing, others, likely your ex's situation, it's more of a rebound or need for attention. You can't take it personally, so try your best to push it out of your mind.

I'm so angry and betrayed it feels like it's going to overwhelm me.

I don't know what to do.
Move on, and be patient - eventually it won't frustrate, hurt or confuse you. Get away from this woman, she's absolutely no good for you. Although the situation is absolute shit, it's happened, and you won't do yourself any good by dwelling on it. Be persistent with getting the money she owes you, but don't be rude, it'll only discourage her from paying you back. Hopefully you can learn from it, which will help you recognize similar things in the future and hopefully avoid it altogether.

Djinn8 said:
Just been around to my mates house. Trying to organise a night, get some birds round. As a great man once said "the best way to get over someone you love, is get into someone you don't"
Um... you complain about your ex dating people (granted, the cheating is unacceptable, but that's not what I'm addressing right now) and now you're trying to distract yourself from frustrations by getting some "birds" around? Ugh, okay...
 

Sniper Team 4

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Apr 28, 2010
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Take comfort in the fact that you helped out the cat at least. The poor thing has nothing to do with anything and it was suffering no doubt. At least you helped it.

As for the rest, I think you've made the right choice. This girl--if your suspicions are correct--is not worth the time. Burn the bridge and don't even look back to watch it fall into the river. It's easier if you simply walk away now, before any regrets or doubts begin to eat at you.
 

Simalacrum

Resident Juggler
Apr 17, 2008
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Drop her, fast. Make sure to get your money back too, as others have advised. I'd suggest just asking for your money back without mentioning any other subject, tell her your no longer going out with her and cut off connections from there. If she tries to talk back at you with insults or whatever, ignore them. It may also be worth finding out whether she actually did get paid or not, and pressure her more for your money back if you find that she's been lying about it. (just don't get violent whatever you do!)

As for the anger thing.... Just try and forget about the experience. Leave it in the past, and move on with your life. You mentioned that it would be scary being single again? Don't worry about that dude, think of it at freedom from the obligations of relationships :p