So I asked this girl out

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mattttherman3

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And she said yes. However, she lives 3 hours away. I asked her last week if she wanted to come down and go to a hockey game and dinner. she said that she can't afford to come down until december, of course my first thought is fuck that. I ask if she would mind if I go see her, shehasn't gotten back to me. Now heres my issue, I asked her out in person. I only have her on facebook, so thats where we are communicating. I gave details of that first date october 30th, she didn't get back to me until november 3rd and that was the last I heard. So it has been a week since I heard from her. Her best friend says shes really busy with work and school. My thought process is that it takes 2 minutes to check facebook and that she doesnt seem interested in me at all! Am I wrong?

Ps sorry for spelling, on my mobile
 

HeartBat

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Sep 7, 2011
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If you really like her, then wait.

If she doesn't answer their are multiple reasons she has for not answering you.

Don't hate on someone though just because of how they ignore you.

The whole 3 hours drive is a kicker though, are you willing to go that extra mile for her?
 

mattttherman3

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Yes, not every werk of course. When I first met her, she brought up star trek and video games. plus shes really nice and good looking
 

])rStrangelove

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Try to stop yourself from thinking of reasons why she could possibly not answer you. Stick to the facts: you don't know yet.

Just wait a bit (3-5 days) then tell her you've been thinking about her. Ask why you havent heard anything from her in a while.

Last time i asked something like "... or are you ignoring me already? ;)" (note that smiley) - i got an answer like "No lol i'm not ignoring you at all, its just i'm busy atm."

Just relax.
 

HeartBat

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Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Slash dementia makes a valid point

take away the material posessions that you like about this girl, are your feelings still the same?
mattttherman3 said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
I have no idea
I'd like to welcome you to love

Its a fickkle thing, so are women, but they are wickedly fine.
 

artanis_neravar

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Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Your asking that if he takes away everything that makes her, her will he still like her?

OT:Not everyone sits on Facebook all the time, I know I'm on facebook when I have nothing to do but as soon as something comes along I don't even think to check. So just give her some time
 

artanis_neravar

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HeartBat said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Slash dementia makes a valid point

take away the material posessions that you like about this girl, are your feelings still the same?
Those aren't material possessions, those are her appearances and her likes, if you take away someones likes they lose most of their personalities. Sure they can still be nice but if you don't like anything then you are just dull. We are attracted to the similarities in likes and dislikes because they will always give you something to relate to with a significant other, and they give you something to do together without someone sacrificing what they really want to do
 

HeartBat

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artanis_neravar said:
HeartBat said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Slash dementia makes a valid point

take away the material posessions that you like about this girl, are your feelings still the same?
Those aren't material possessions, those are her appearances and her likes, if you take away someones likes they lose most of their personalities. Sure they can still be nice but if you don't like anything then you are just dull. We are attracted to the similarities in likes and dislikes because they will always give you something to relate to with a significant other, and they give you something to do together without someone sacrificing what they really want to do
You hit the nail on the head there.

Not only have you helped the OP, but you have helped me.
 

artanis_neravar

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HeartBat said:
artanis_neravar said:
HeartBat said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Slash dementia makes a valid point

take away the material posessions that you like about this girl, are your feelings still the same?
Those aren't material possessions, those are her appearances and her likes, if you take away someones likes they lose most of their personalities. Sure they can still be nice but if you don't like anything then you are just dull. We are attracted to the similarities in likes and dislikes because they will always give you something to relate to with a significant other, and they give you something to do together without someone sacrificing what they really want to do
You hit the nail on the head there.

Not only have you helped the OP, but you have helped me.
As long as that isn't sarcasm, glad I could help...hell even if it is I'll stick with the same answer
 

Slash Dementia

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artanis_neravar said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Your asking that if he takes away everything that makes her, her will he still like her?

OT:Not everyone sits on Facebook all the time, I know I'm on facebook when I have nothing to do but as soon as something comes along I don't even think to check. So just give her some time
Not exactly everything, though it does sound like it. Besides, those things are just small (assuming they are) parts of her personality. There's a whole person there with lots of thoughts and interests besides those named.

I know that if I took away the games, zombies, and--let's say--near-similar movies from my girlfriend, I'd still feel about the same, though, not as much as I do for her.

Just get to know her better; the other sides of her deserve a look.

Oh, and I had forgotten: not everyone is on Facebook everyday, so don't let that get to you so much.
 

artanis_neravar

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Slash Dementia said:
artanis_neravar said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Your asking that if he takes away everything that makes her, her will he still like her?

OT:Not everyone sits on Facebook all the time, I know I'm on facebook when I have nothing to do but as soon as something comes along I don't even think to check. So just give her some time
Not exactly everything, though it does sound like it. Besides, those things are just small (assuming they are) parts of her personality. There's a whole person there with lots of thoughts and interests besides those named.

I know that if I took away the games, zombies, and--let's say--near-similar movies from my girlfriend, I'd still feel about the same, though, not as much as I do for her.

Just get to know her better; the other sides of her deserve a look.

Oh, and I had forgotten: not everyone is on Facebook everyday, so don't let that get to you so much.
I see, so you're not saying that if she didn't like those things would he still like her you're wondering if he likes other things about her rather then just her looks and likes of games, or if it's just these superficial things that attract him
 

Slash Dementia

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artanis_neravar said:
Slash Dementia said:
artanis_neravar said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Your asking that if he takes away everything that makes her, her will he still like her?

OT:Not everyone sits on Facebook all the time, I know I'm on facebook when I have nothing to do but as soon as something comes along I don't even think to check. So just give her some time
Not exactly everything, though it does sound like it. Besides, those things are just small (assuming they are) parts of her personality. There's a whole person there with lots of thoughts and interests besides those named.

I know that if I took away the games, zombies, and--let's say--near-similar movies from my girlfriend, I'd still feel about the same, though, not as much as I do for her.

Just get to know her better; the other sides of her deserve a look.

Oh, and I had forgotten: not everyone is on Facebook everyday, so don't let that get to you so much.
I see, so you're not saying that if she didn't like those things would he still like her you're wondering if he likes other things about her rather then just her looks and likes of games, or if it's just these superficial things that attract him
Exactly.

I guess I rushed my first post because I was almost going to be late for class.
 

artanis_neravar

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Slash Dementia said:
artanis_neravar said:
Slash Dementia said:
artanis_neravar said:
Slash Dementia said:
Take off the good-looking, Star Trek, and video games. Would you like her still?
Your asking that if he takes away everything that makes her, her will he still like her?

OT:Not everyone sits on Facebook all the time, I know I'm on facebook when I have nothing to do but as soon as something comes along I don't even think to check. So just give her some time
Not exactly everything, though it does sound like it. Besides, those things are just small (assuming they are) parts of her personality. There's a whole person there with lots of thoughts and interests besides those named.

I know that if I took away the games, zombies, and--let's say--near-similar movies from my girlfriend, I'd still feel about the same, though, not as much as I do for her.

Just get to know her better; the other sides of her deserve a look.

Oh, and I had forgotten: not everyone is on Facebook everyday, so don't let that get to you so much.
I see, so you're not saying that if she didn't like those things would he still like her you're wondering if he likes other things about her rather then just her looks and likes of games, or if it's just these superficial things that attract him
Exactly.

I guess I rushed my first post because I was almost going to be late for class.
I understand now, in that case I agree wholeheartedly with you
 

PotatoeMan

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Seems very early to be worried about that. If you aren?t dating you can go out and meet other girls. It?s no big deal. If she isn?t meeting you until December I doubt she expects you not to meet other girls.
 

artanis_neravar

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PotatoeMan said:
Seems very early to be worried about that. If you aren?t dating you can go out and meet other girls. It?s no big deal. If she isn?t meeting you until December I doubt she expects you not to meet other girls.
Thing is, I don't think he wants to go meet other girls
 

Gamblerjoe

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Wait it out. A lot of guys have to do the same waiting without the affirmation before hand. Maybe she's busy, maybe she's testing you, maybe she's actually nervous about getting together with you. Most likely she's actually busy. Being busy enough can consume your mind and cause you to overlook daily minutia like checking Facebook.

Saying or doing the wrong thing could screw this up. On the other hand, if you wait and it ends up not working out, what did you really lose. Look at which mistake will cost you less.
 

mattttherman3

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Dec 16, 2008
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I guess ill wait, i mean ive been waiting since grade 9 to find someone so whats another week? (currently 22 years old) thanks for advice and again sorry about spelling!