So I just realized I'm a terrible person...

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De Ronneman

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Dec 30, 2009
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So, ditch the one you don't like. If she get's on your nerves, it's not really a good relationship, is it? I've been in exactly the same spot, but my Englishteacher was a coworker.

It's best to cut it of, being broken is overrated. Being deceived is worse.
 

Canid117

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Oct 6, 2009
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Well your conscience is fucking up your internal shit because of your jealous douchebag moment which is a good thing. Honestly I would go with the person you describe as "Created in a lab to be awesome" because do you really think you are doing the other girl a favor by letting her stay in a one sided relationship?
 

geldonyetich

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Aug 2, 2006
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There's this common sentiment that you're supposed to be madly in love with your mate, propagating a kind of incredible magic that keeps you eager to be with them, throughout time forever, and if that feeling isn't there then your relationship is wrong.

In my opinion, it's a rather silly idea where you hold another individual to rather arbitrary standards.

So, you've a cute gal 2 years your junior who thinks you're the hottest thing since sliced bread? Is she a liability somehow? No? Then what logical reason do you have not to do your damnedest to return her affections?

Because I promote you this, if you're going to go along with that common sentiment that your relationship is only as good as your ability to feel hot monkey attraction to your mate, you're destined for divorce in the long run, as that kind of animal instinct really doesn't last through perpetuity.
 

TheRightToArmBears

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Dec 13, 2008
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S.R.S. said:

Sorry it's all I could think about.

Ask BonsaiK, he's the relationship advice guy around here.
Funny, I was thinking about Thin Lizzy's Don't Believe A Word.

"That just might be some other city pretty girl I'm singing to"

"Your heart was just like that promise; made to be broken"

Aside from ^What he said^, I think it's harsh to break up with her again... basically, I think this whole thing is a giant dick move, but you realised you're being a dick so it's not as bad. Perhaps you should avoid the bangin' English teacher, and try to concentrate on the current girl's good points, and forget about the teacher chick.

Or, if you would like to keep up with the dick moves, how about two-timing? If they don't know about it, you could be in with a chance at scoring. Twice. If only there was another one, then I could shout "Hatrick!"
 

MintyNinja

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Sep 17, 2009
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SODAssault said:
OP perfectly represents a good portion of what I hate about growing up in this generation: people are so goddamn wrapped up in what they want, and feel so entitled to it that they'll unthinkingly stomp all over others in their quest to find what makes them personally happy.

Then, when they finally stop to reflect on what they've done, they shrug and say "Well, I guess that should make me a shitty person, but I don't feel like one. Say, give me five minutes to rationalize my way out of any and all feelings of guilt, and then I'll be back to doing this before you know it." Or, just as commonly, "yep, I'm a shitty person, and so I'll pretend to be ashamed of it like it's a problem I have no control over even though the most basic level of self-control could have prevented this, or maybe I'll even act like I'm proud of this fact, because both options easier than changing in any way."

Such narcissism. You have no idea how sick I am of people trying to justify doing shitty things just because "it's who I am, and you should accept me for it". I blame the whole "self-esteem movement" that went on the entire time I was in school. Y'know, how kids were taught to accept each other, and everybody's different in their own way but we should be okay with that. It succeeded in removing the sense of shame from pretty much everyone and made everyone comfortable with who they are, but that turned out to be bad because shame is what primarily governs our sense of morality and decency. We watch "reality TV" where the backstabbers and total cocksuckers are the ones that make it to the top; we hear about the grossly decadent and amoral lives that the rich and successful lead, and as a result, being a piece of shit is marketed to us in the same way that beer commercials convince us that drinking is the only way to party.

I'm not some conservative Christian watchdog that shakes his head and mutters about "kids these days", I'm just sick of being around these same fuckstains that grew up being taught that the world owes them something, and if it isn't provided to them by some random happenstance, then they should take it from somebody else. It's not ambition, it's a sense of over-entitlement, and frankly, I'm done tolerating that kind of bullshit from people. Compassion is on the ropes and we're all winding up to deal the final blow by idolizing the asswipes that live so obscenely that the Romans would vomit involuntarily.

By the way, OP, regarding your situation: I have nothing but contempt for you.
This, but I do envy you the opportunity with the new girl.
 

Arcane Azmadi

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Jan 23, 2009
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Fuck, man, you COMPLETELY fucked up. You are a complete screw up. Ignore anyone on this thread who tells you that "you only did what many people have done" or "it's a natural mistake to make"- you should be ashamed of yourself.

Frankly, your behavior was so appalling that you've forfeited your right to be happy. If you'd take my advice (which you won't, because it'll be so much easier for you to ignore it in favour of all the people here saying "dump her and take the girl you want") then you'd forget about this new girl and dedicate yourself to making your ex-ex- as happy as you can for as long as you can. Do NOT see this english teacher on the sly, do NOT surreptitiously try and drive your current girl off by altering your behavior so that she can't stand you- YOU fucked up so YOU take responsibility for your fuck-ups. You don't get to be happy here, pal. You don't DESERVE to be happy here.

But hey, why would you listen to a voice on the internet? You didn't come here for advice, you came here for validation of your decision to ruin this girl's life and the hope that sympathy, even backhanded, would make you feel better about yourself.
 

DaOysterboy

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Apr 4, 2010
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So let me get this straight. A girl loves you more than anything in the world and you break up with her. She starts dating and (for reasons unknown) you get jealous and tell her you love her more than anything too (liar). You get her back, but start going to parties without her and start trying to hook up. You find someone new who you THINK might be more awesome and you come online to ask Teh Intarwebs how to solve your relationship problems. All this time I'm assuming that loves-you-more-than-anything girl has no idea there are problems in the relationship making you consider another break up? Yep, I'd say that makes you a terrible person. Maybe not Charles Manson, but dishonest and manipulative at least. You may want to consider counseling. Tell your girlfriend the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I'm guessing that if she's not a masochist half of your decision might be made for you (hey, less skin off your nose right?). And you should probably stay away from both girls until you've talked to somebody more professional.
 

Lord_Panzer

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Feb 6, 2009
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You broke up with her even though she loves you because you weren't happy = +10 points.
You got back together with her solely because you saw her with someone else and went off like a five year old = -50 points.
You meet a girl who was 'engineered in a lab' to be perfect for you = Good for you, but no points.
You want to break up with the girlfriend you've already crushed once because you met someone new who you've only known for a couple weeks = -150 points.
You ask The Internet for help = -300 points.

Grand total = You're completely fucked.

If you're even remotely contemplating leaving your current girlfriend (again) for someone else, do it and never look her in the eyes again. If she loves you as much as you say she does, you quite honestly don't get to be on the same playing field as her anymore. If you two breaking up (again) allows you to pursue this new woman unhindered then have at it, but I just hope you don't end up doing the exact same thing to her, for her sake.
 

Yarkaz

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Aug 22, 2009
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Unfortunately, I believe that a relationship without love from both sides is doomed to fail. Basically, your current girlfriend seems like a time bomb waiting to explode, happy as she may be now. As cruel as it seems, dumping her is probably your best bet. Better you be happy now and she has the chance to move on then you both end up in an unhappy relationship later. But then, I'm still quite young and have little experience in this area. Good luck, all the same.

All the same, I don't think you're a terrible person. You're just a guy who messed up, and at least you are a good enough guy to recognize the mistake and look for the best solution. In that light, I'd say you're actually not that bad of a guy.

EDIT: I also don't think you should get with the teacher. Leaving one girl specifically for another, I would say, is a bad thing. Very bad. I only think you should break up with the first girl because that relationship will eventually merit nothing but problems.
 

Sikachu

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Apr 20, 2010
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Shotgun_Ninja said:
snip

Thoughts?
Well, the main thoughts running through my head were 'you're an arsehole' and 'get a fucking blog, no-one cares about the minutiae of your life'. I wouldn't normally leave such bluntly rude comments but you asked for my thoughts, so I think it is on topic. I'm sure you have redeeming features.
 

electric discordian

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Apr 27, 2008
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It takes a man to stick by his course, you appear to be a child who wants all the sweeties in the store, sorry to be a downer but some people fight their entire lives to find someone who loves them. You had that, threw it away on a whim then wanted it back realising the grass is greener back in the old pasture.

Show some impulse control and stick with the girl you have taken back, work on your issues and don't go for the more attractive package, that way lies madness! You will never be happy unless you come to terms with this love em and leave em attitude.

You never know this teacher may find you just as irritating when your not casual friends. We have all had feelings like this in the past it's how you deal with them that makes you a strong person.

I am not an expert but I have been happily married for about 7 years, despite my rather obnoxious qualities! I am lucky to have a wonderful wife!