So my plane just landed in Heathrow...

[triggrhappy94]

Well, that's not neccesarily true, it landed yesterday around noon. This is my first chance to post this and that was the best title could come up with.
For all the British Escapists out there, you should know Heathrow is a large airport in London. I flew internationally from SFO (San Fransisco's airport), its was an over 10 hour flight. Now I'm sitting in bed in the flat we rented hoping your gaint outlets don't fry my laptop and aclomating to 8 hour time difference between here and California.
Its been very interesting trying to adjust, because this is my first time in London and really being outside of the US or US territories.

I thought I'd also post some observations, like that its really hard not to kind of laugh at your guys accent.
It seems like you guys only really have two TV channels here, Dave and BBC; who is this Dave guy? Do your door knobs on your front doors do anything, or are there just there? I've already locked myself out of the once while trying to figure out the front door. I'm starting to notice all of those foods Yahtzee always talks about in the super market, like Marmite and Maltesers. You guys also have different flavors of Dorritos here too, and I guess Lay's are "Walkers". Do your chimneys actually work, because they all look pretty old? I have never seen so many brick buildings too. I found a Mexican resturant while I was walking around, I can't wait to eat there.

EDIT:
Why do you guys have shows called "Shameless USA" and "One Every Minute USA" (something like that)? I also feel like we're always about to hit on coming traffic whenever we drive any where, because you guys drive on the wrong side (as opposed to the right side). I want to try the Mexican food just to see how Mexican it realy is.
Oh yeah, I'm taller than the bathroom.
What's in a lamb samosa (I think that's what its called), and a cornish pasty? I had a lamb samosa last night and it was really weird, and I was thinking about gettng a cornish pasty.
Your soda cans are smaller.
What's a Cowboy Trap? It seems like a bad thing.

 

[Griffolion]

Well, that's not neccesarily true, it landed yesterday around noon. This is my first chance to post this and that was the best title could come up with.
For all the British Escapists out there, you should know Heathrow is a large airport in London. I flew internationally from SFO (San Fransisco's airport), its was an over 10 hour flight. Now I'm sitting in bed in the flat we rented hoping your gaint outlets don't fry my laptop and aclomating to 8 hour time difference between here and California.
Its been very interesting trying to adjust, because this is my first time in London and really being outside of the US or US territories.

I thought I'd also post some observations, like that its really hard not to kind of laugh at your guys accent.
It seems like you guys only really have two TV channels here, Dave and BBC; who is this Dave guy? Do your door knobs on your front doors do anything, or are there just there? I've already locked myself out of the once while trying to figure out the front door. I'm starting to notice all of those foods Yahtzee always talks about in the super market, like Marmite and Maltesers. You guys also have different flavors of Dorritos here too, and I guess Lay's are "Walkers". Do your chimneys actually work, because they all look pretty old? I have never seen so many brick buildings too. I found a Mexican resturant while I was walking around, I can't wait to eat there.

Dave is a channel for re-runs of old favourites like Top Gear, QI and Mock the Week. Don't know who he is. BBC is the best television broadcasting network in the world for quality and impartiality. The doors are simple enough to use, though I admit they are a step up from US style doors which appear to be designed with monkeys in mind (in my time over there). The regular handles are easy enough, just unlock and turn downwards. The ones where unlocking and opening are in a single motion can be a bit of an arse as they lock as soon as they shut. Marmite is disgusting, Bovril all the way. Malteasers are a great British institution, enjoy them and marvel at our chocolateering prowess. And yes, Lays is what Walkers call themselves in America. A few chimneys do, most are for decoration considering the marvel of central heating. We have so many brick buildings because the nearest fault line to us is about 200 miles away, meaning nothing really ever falls down here, so we can afford to invest in better build houses than wood with a bit of cinder block. Mexican food over here pales in comparison to over in the states, avoid at all cost lest you wish to ruin your perception of Mexican forever. But DO go to Nandos if you can find one, you'll love it, seriously.

Edit: Just saw the accent comment, ditto, and we had our accents before your country was even born, just saying.

 

[SckizoBoy]

I thought I'd also post some observations, like that its really hard not to kind of laugh at your guys accent.

You haven't been to Birmingham yet...

I'm starting to notice all of those foods Yahtzee always talks about in the super market, like Marmite and Maltesers.

You forgot the most important one: BRANSTON PICKLE!!

And terrestrial TV should have five channels (two for the Beeb, ITV & Channels 4/5), though to be fair, they're mostly shit.

Still, welcome to the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, we hope you enjoy your stay (at least, I think we do...).

 

[Jedamethis]

Oh, Dave is our unofficial leader. If he ever shows up to your flat in the middle of the night, treat him with respect and don't give him a shitty present.
You twist door knobs away from the doorframe to open. I'd find you a diagram, but I'm lazy...
I'unno, I usually buy McCoys. Man Crisps!
I've never really looked at the roofs of any houses, and then looked to see if there's a fireplace so I'unno.

Hope you enjoy your stay!

Oh, and screw Marmite. You either love it or you buy jars purely so you can pulverise them because it tastes so bad.

 

[SL33TBL1ND]

Do your chimneys actually work, because they all look pretty old?

Dude, chimneys are holes in the roof. They aren't the sort of thing that breaks.

 

[Mr. Eff_v1legacy]

I was in the UK this past May. Friends seems to be on 24 hours a day.

 

[Crazy Zaul]

Dave used to be called something else more normal sounding.

 

[EightGaugeHippo]

Welcome...

The door knobs where I live work fine, so I don't know what to say about that... Turn the handle and enter the building.

Most houses in England are at least 30 years old.
A large percent (including mine) Stretch up to 100 years old.
So the chimney pots are usually original... most people use central heating so it doesn't matter if they work.

Does America really not have many brick houses?
I can't even begin to think what would happen to a wooden house in British weather.

 

[Cheesus333]

I thought I'd also post some observations, like that its really hard not to kind of laugh at your guys accent.
It seems like you guys only really have two TV channels here, Dave and BBC; who is this Dave guy? Do your door knobs on your front doors do anything, or are there just there? I've already locked myself out of the once while trying to figure out the front door. I'm starting to notice all of those foods Yahtzee always talks about in the super market, like Marmite and Maltesers. You guys also have different flavors of Dorritos here too, and I guess Lay's are "Walkers". Do your chimneys actually work, because they all look pretty old? I have never seen so many brick buildings too. I found a Mexican resturant while I was walking around, I can't wait to eat there.

Okay then. Welcome to England! I hope you enjoy your time here - to make such a task easier, avoid anyone consistent with whatever description of the word 'chav' you've been given. They're not good people.

- Mocking people's accents will get you communally gang-banged. I recommend you keep trying to hold it in
- We have many channels, I imagine these two are just the ones you are getting on your flat's TV. Channel 4 is my favourite. Or maybe E4...
- They do things. Namely, they open them.
- Malteasers are delicious and crunchy. Buy yourself some, you'll like them. Probably.
- Walkers are essentially the British version, yeah. I think one owns the other, or something. We call them crisps. Chips are fried potato sticks.
- Some of them do, but you should remember that London is fucking old. It's older than any city in the USA. Therefore, there are bound to be a lot of things that no longer do anything.
- Don't come to England and eat Mexican food. Come to England and eat Fish and Chips. ALL THE DAMN TIME.

On behalf of everyone in... Yorkshire, a couple of hundred miles North, I hope you enjoy your time in London!

Dave used to be called something else more normal sounding.

Was it Gold TV? Or Bravo? I can't even remember, I completely forgot the old name :S

 

[Tharwen]

Yeah... it seems most people have Sky for their TV needs. BBC channels tend to have both extremes of amazing and completely shit. Some of the chimneys are blocked, but a lot of people have fireplaces that they never use.

How cold does it feel to you? Do we seem unfriendly to strangers or not? Were you surprised to find that it actually rains a normal amount rather than the constant downpour you were told you'd find here?

Also, what sort of door handle are you talking about? Is there a keyhole that controls the bolt and a knob that doesn't turn or something? Most houses have a turning handle with a latch and a keyhole with a bolt.

 

[Shymer]

Watching houses get built in the US is phenomenal. It arrives flat-pack style like it's from IKEA. They are massive inside, look alarmingly flimsy (although use expensive modern materials and so cope well with extremes of weather we don't get in the UK) and have no independent climate control (they rely on AC technology to do that) or sound-proofing - then again you are usually so far from the road and from neighbours that it's OK, but it does mean massive energy consumption.

Oh and all of the many livings rooms can probably take a Kinect with room to spare.

UK houses are usually much smaller, brick-built single living room and rely on insulation and glazing rather than AC. Many houses used to be state owned "council" houses, but now most are in private hands, or in the hands of housing associations. Chimneys are a matter of course, although the reasoning has changed from coal fires - to common style - to a resurgence in multi-fuel burners/stoves for the affluent (cheaper than gas/electric). In many houses where they are not in use, they are blocked up to eliminate draughts. If they are in use with smoky fuel, then they need cleaning.

As a nation we don't use Kinect because our rooms are too small. We are waiting for that $30 dongle that adds wide-angle lens which will shortly be launched.

UK chocolate is formulated very differently to the US - different balance of sugar, milk and cocoa. I can't stand US chocolate - but that is likely to be because it was not what I was brought up on and so I don't get the hit of warm nostalgia and comfort of childhood from eating it.

UK TV adverts benefit from a lack of telephone companies slagging each other off - and infomercials are pushed onto one or two channels of their own. Advert breaks also seem less frequent - leaving you with more programme to watch. It might be me, but channels like Dave might be reversing that trend.

I can't believe you flew from California to London to go to a Mexican restaurant. That's like me flying from London to LA to get some Welsh Rarebit or a Cornish Cream Tea. *8)

 

[jim1398]

Was it Gold TV? Or Bravo? I can't even remember, I completely forgot the old name :S

I think it was UK Gold 2.


To TC, go and buy some 'Hobnob' biscuits (plain or chocolate, it doesn't matter which). You can thank me later.

 

[Alfador_VII]

Dave used to be called something else more normal sounding.

No it didn't, it was UKTV G2.

I'm still trying to work out what sort of weird malfunctioning TV the OP was using that he could only get 1 Terrestrial and 1 random Digital channel

 

[triggrhappy94]

Dave used to be called something else more normal sounding.

No it didn't, it was UKTV G2.

I'm still trying to work out what sort of weird malfunctioning TV the OP was using that he could only get 1 Terrestrial and 1 random Digital channel

Well it wasnt malfunctioning. It just seemed like every other channel was either BBC or Dave with a number after it, like Dave 5, BBC 3. I'm used to a bit more of a selection like Fox, MSNBC, ABC, etc.

Welcome...

The door knobs where I live work fine, so I don't know what to say about that... Turn the handle and enter the building.

Most houses in England are at least 30 years old.
A large percent (including mine) Stretch up to 100 years old.
So the chimney pots are usually original... most people use central heating so it doesn't matter if they work.

Does America really not have many brick houses?
I can't even begin to think what would happen to a wooden house in British weather.

The door handle's weird, I guess you're suppose to unlock it and open it in one motion.
And I'm used to SF buildings, which look similar, but not a lot of brick. California is pretty much one big fault line. We're suppose to be an island in another million years or so.

[

I'm starting to notice all of those foods Yahtzee always talks about in the super market, like Marmite and Maltesers.

You forgot the most important one: BRANSTON PICKLE!!

I haven't seen Branston Pickle yet, but I'm keeping an eye open for it.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

most chimneys dont work. my bedroom has a bricked up one, and my house is so old it has 8.
Dave is pretty much Top Gear and QI etc (old BBC stuff), try E4 that has American stuff.

To TC, go and buy some 'Hobnob' biscuits (plain or chocolate, it doesn't matter which). You can thank me later.

oh yeah, theyre great.
and english people do have funny accents. mine is worse: my ma is english and my dad is scottish (from the outer hebrides).

this is the queen (she's on money)

this is queen (theyre on records) s remember the difference.
and if prince charles comes up, just remember he's pretty racist... its a running joke on Mock the Week (which comes near the end of the week and satirises the entire week's news)
and forget a bit of elementary school english, we use more s's (not z's (which are zeds)) and o's it seems.
and invest in fairly warm clothing (sweaters mainly) because it is bloody freezing.
and finally, fish n chips. its pretty much the national food. dont get marmite: half of its ads call it shit and the other half dont exist any more...

thats pretty much all i can think of about britain.

 

[Azure-Supernova]

Well it wasnt malfunctioning. It just seemed like every other channel was either BBC or Dave with a number after it, like Dave 5, BBC 3. I'm used to a bit more of a selection like Fox, MSNBC, ABC, etc.

It's probably whatever box you've got hooked up, probably a freeview box that gets around 100 channels, 50 of which will be pay per view porn/shopping channels. Sky's where it's at, it gets... everything I think?

Chimney in my nan's house still works, only use it at Christmas though. A lot of houses round near me are ex-coalboard, meaning they were inhabited by miners a fair few years back. They're all good, sturdy brick and mortar houses; just a tad cosy though.

Enjoy the accents. There's about a million of them.

 

[jim1398]

Well it wasnt malfunctioning. It just seemed like every other channel was either BBC or Dave with a number after it, like Dave 5, BBC 3. I'm used to a bit more of a selection like Fox, MSNBC, ABC, etc.

We do get a lot of selection, you just have to pay for it by subscribing to something like Sky TV or Virgin media. If you've just got a freeview box (which is likely if you're in a rented flat), then you aren't going to get a huge selection due to it being...well, free.

 

[SckizoBoy]

I haven't seen Branston Pickle yet, but I'm keeping an eye open for it.

To be honest, Branston Pickle (especially the brand that Yahtzee displays in some of his ZP vids) isn't that common a sight. A lot of large supermarkets don't stock them, which I find both surprising and disappointing.

and if prince charles comes up, just remember he's pretty racist... its a running joke on Mock the Week (which comes near the end of the week and satirises the entire week's news)

No, you're thinking Prince Phillip there (and perhaps Boris Johnson). Prince Charles is the 'green' one who talks to plants, sells biscuits no-one short of nobility can afford and reckons the monarch should play a bigger part in politics. Yeah, don't ask...

 

[nick n stuff]

I thought I'd also post some observations, like that its really hard not to kind of laugh at your guys accent.

You haven't been to Birmingham yet...

As a Brummie I can really vouch for that. we sound so uneducated...but we're ok with it.