Social life and escapism

[Ulquiorra4sama]

So it's been about a month since my college classes started up now. I got back to America from Norway about a week before then, but from that week and every weekend since there's been pretty much non-stop partying and social gatherings, sometimes even during the middle of the week. Usual amount of people is between 8-15 people at each "event".

Personally i've been starting to feel like it's more than enough. Since me and my roommate from last year have gotten our own apartment off-campus now our place is pretty much the hub area, and so every friday/saturday night there's stuff happening which pushes sunday back to the much needed study day.

Anyways: I've usually not had much issue with social gatherings happening around me before, but i've previously been able to push them sort of into the background if i wanted to by slipping back into my room and play games or something if the noise started becoming annoying, but this year i have the pleasure of having my TV sat in the middle of the living-room. What joy. So when people stream in to our apartment i'm usually forced to end my gaming session there because of social conduct.

What i've decided now, since i actually don't have any homework due on monday, is to steal my tv back into my room for one day and be a complete shut-in for the first time this semester. A bit of "Me time" or whatever.

Basically my question boils down to: Have you ever been in a similar situation where you just had enough of the people around you and needed, not "wanted", but needed your escapism to stop from feeling like you were going insane? If so how'd you deal with it?

 

[BQE]

You'll be amazed at how easy it is to avoid people once you are out working in the "real" world. It's a complete option for me, even with two roommates I'm able to have as much unbothered time as I want to myself.

 

[Sigmund Av Volsung]

Yeah, that happens quite often to me, I am very introverted, and just so my luck: I am going to a college that is really small and has 2000 people in it (lunchtimes are nightmares).

Usually, I just go home and play games, if that doesn't help, I find a quiet spot by a tree, sit there and just listen to music.

But then again, it could because I make it very clear to others when I want to be by myself.

 

[Hero of Lime]

Can't say I've had extreme bouts of social time. As much as I like to be social, it's a lot more common for me to be on my own playing games, doing school work, exercising, and going on the internet. So no, I never needed to escape from real life because of too many social events.

In fact, there have been more times I wanted to escape from the escapism itself!

Spoiler

 

[HoneyVision]

Don't cut ties off just yet.
FACT: The older you get the harder it is to make friends.

Unless you absolutely cannot stand certain people, keep them as acquaintances. I think having too many friends is better than eventually having no friends.

 

[Fiz_The_Toaster]

Dude, I do that all the time.

I'm a fairly busy person, and I do a lot. Some people I know would even say that I do too much, but whatever. When I want to be left alone, I make a point to tell people that. I've done that to friends, and people at work. It's nothing against them, I'm really introverted, but there are times where I want to lock myself away and read a book, play a game, or watch some Youtube.

I get fairly cranky if I don't have "me time", and that's just bad news bears for everyone involved.

 

[Malbourne]

I dunno what it is about being introverted, but being with people is just incredibly exhausting. I'm fine talking to one person, two or three if I've had my musical fix, but any more and I just sort of, um, crumble. Sweat everywhere. It's not a pretty sight. Even after all the social practice I've had, any group setting is a challenge (But I welcome a challenge!). A few localized friends are enough for me, thanks.

 

[BishopofAges]

I have had days at a time when it feels like I am never alone, but an odd concept crept upon me recently involving technology and the want to 'escape.'

Speaking from a personal aspect, it seems a lot of the newer technology has brought everyone and their grandmother's dog to the internet. what this means to me is people are never really 'alone' or have the ability to 'escape' into technology, or at least it feels that way to me. Whenever you log on to a site or update a blog, or just plainly start up a game, if you don't have some sort of privacy setting on, you find yourself hit up by any random dude you may or may not know on your friend list.

Whenever I 'escape' it ends up being a day I hide in my room watching movies or taking a walk, which surprised me with a revelation: I was using the outside world for escapist purposes. An odd concept to some of the more outdoorsy social crowd, but when your job, school, and leisure take place on the computer, the outside looks all the more inviting.

 

[BeerTent]

For me, it's a long walk. Leave the apartment, get some fresh air and see what's around locally. Could be in the middle of the night, could be the middle of the day. Treat yourself to a pizza slice or something. I've made the promise to myself to never forgo social activity for videogaming, to be much more sociable. The only time I was ignoring this rule was when I was living with people I didn't like. Which was completely awful.

Are you in that situation? Can you request to your apartment-mates to get a weekend break? To go to the dorms once in a while, instead of inviting people over? Or are you in a nasty situation? You'd be surprised how much you can do if you just talk to someone, and be reasonable about it.

 

[Strazdas]

I had these situations. i actually would go out and sit in a basement (at this location basement was more of a storage house, seperate building in the yard, but we called it basement). i had one room in there for me and i actually made it sort of my room. the electricity was dissapearing randomly, there was no services, but i had a place where i could be alone!
Then i moved to another city, and started living there. I did and still do live alone. And then this happened:

it can be pretty easy to fall into the routine of isolating yourself and then it becomes hard and impossible for some people to get back into socialising.

So yeah, avoid it if you can, but i agree that every weekend all weekend is way too much.

P.S. its your TV. steal it back to your room permanently. And tell them that coming here to party is not an option.

 

[Angie7F]

i feel like that at least once a week.
I thin it is only natural to feel that way so go ahead and turn off phones etc and enjoy your solitude

 

[Artina89]

I often feel the need to have a bit of "me time", especially when I started my job because there is usually at least three other people at any one time in the laboratory I work in, and we work in fairly close quarters. As a result, when I get home, I often get something to eat, go out for my walk (or run) and then just retreat in my room and play video games, browse on here and watch youtube videos. My housemates and I often don't see each other for days at a time, because they often feel the same way. We hang out together on a weekend, but we use weeknights for ourselves. Its a nice arrangement.

 

[IndomitableSam]

I go out with friends once a week, sometimes only every couple weeks, and that's plenty for me. I live with @Miyenne, so we've always got each other around and that's enough for me. Always been an introvert and I'm uncomfortable in many social situations. ... Which is funny, since I used to teach and loved it. Different dynamic, though.

As it is, being social every day is exhausting. It's actually a real thing for introverts to be drained by social situations,w hile extroverts thrive on them.

Even just going to work all day makes me want to go home and crawl into my chair and watch movies or play games all the time. Sometimes I even take sick days just so I can have some down time (except that I'm totally burned out at work, so that's an issue, too).

I'm happiest at home without having to put on my "Public Sam" persona, which I'm sure everyone else thinks they have, too. It's just tiring, and thankfully I have a few friends that I don't have to slap that mask on with, but if it's a big group, being pretend Sam for more than a few hours is torture and I just want to go home.

Yay socially awkwardness.

 

[KarmaTheAlligator]

Yeah, I've had that happen in the second house I moved in after going to Ireland. The other lads had a habit of partying a lot, while I was working early shifts. I thought I was going to go insane and murder someone when they kept barging in on me trying to sleep and urge me to join the fun. I thankfully moved away after a few months to be on my own.

Now I live with people who understand that I might not want to go out if I don't feel like it and therefore don't insist past a "are you sure?", and I'm very happy.

 

[omega 616]

Snip

That happened in about 2007, been having me time since. It's so fucking liberating to never have to compromise or depend on people, there is no back stabbing or drama (no he said, she said or gossip). If I want to play a game I will, if want to go anywhere I will etc

There is a stigma with "me time" that you're boring or selfish or whatever but I think people should spend way more time alone. Helps you deal with stuff and makes your life more simple... When I do hang around during people I immediately notice life becoming more complicated. You can still do everything but you get to take a step back and look at the bigger picture, instead of in the midst of chaos and caught up in everything.