Someone has put a hit on you...

[maninahat]

Probably, it would be my ex who would hire the hit man. She's Chinese, so doubtless the assassin would be some kind of Chow-Yun-Fat character who bursts into my flat, guns akimbo. I'd escape by simply visiting my friend in the room upstairs, leaving the assassin to run around my kitchen, scratching his head and wondering where I'd gone.

 

[mikecoulter]

I'd get out the house, hide where I could see the entrance to my road, find the guy trying to kill me. Suffocate him using a plastic bag or a guitar string and then find/kill all involved.

[small]Just another day at the office...[/small]

 

[Cpu46]

I don't know who would want me dead, however if someone was coming to get me I would get in my car, speed to michigan, and take cover at my grandparents house.
sounds like a weak stronghold but really its the safest place I know it has
1: only one entrance and a simple floor-plan
2: a gun cabinet
3: Guns
4: Ammo
5: Grandmas cooking (yum)

Oddly, this sounds quite similar to a 'zombie defense' plan.

How will your Grandma respond to you being marked for death? She isn't going to offer them cookies or anything when they bust through the door, right?

yea this is pretty much my "If I'm in any sort of danger that I can't deal with on my own plan"

As for my grandma offering them food, it would make a good distraction while everyone else sneaks behind them with assorted blunt (or quite sharp and pointy) weapons.

 

[Spitfire175]

I would gather up all of my functioning guns, which is quite a lot, take my neigbours car and head for a cabin in the woods some 400 miles up north. Or an army base.

If someone wanted me dead, it's either Finnish communists or some Russians, I have a few connections.

Then I'd get a bike and a weird French girlfriend.

It's a chopper, not a bike.

 

[Walkingreenman987]

no idea who would want me dead, i psycho ex of my girlfriends maybe?

as for what i would do, i'd run. i would ask my flatmate to run an errand for me so he wasnt there when the hitman comes, (and pray the hitman doesnt wait in my house for me to come back and run into my flatmate instead) i wouldnt contact anyone for fear they got caught up in it. I'd get all the cash i could, alter my image and most likely head out of the country. i'd probably just keep running and wouldnt stop, for fear that they could keep tracking me.

 

[Nevyrmoore]

I'd kill myself.

You can't put out a hit when I'm already dead!

 

[wolfshrimp]

Hmmm.. most people in my uni seem to think of me as more the hitman type but ok...

I think the only people who might try to have me killed are my brother's Italian friends. No stereotypes, I've lived in Italy and integrated with the culture quite well and I know Mafia kids personally. If they felt I was somehow making my brother unhappy or taking his attention away from them they may send someone.

As for what I'd do.
Load my guns (they're only CO2 pistols and rifles but I'm a good shot- could take out an eye)
Take several changes of clothes and hats, buy some food from the supermarket, then take a bus up into the moorlands and wait.

 

[TMAN10112]

Put on my kevlar vest and ghillie suit, load up my guns (Shotgun+Colt 1911 for back-up), set up a decoy inside, and wait outside for the hunter to become the hunted.

Being prepared for these situations is my hobby.

 

[Ashtovo]

Well I already know I'm one of many genetically modified fetuses, naturally-born, from a failed super soldier project that was tested on unsuspecting mothers in the early 80's. Our programming, aggressive qualities and motor functions turned out well but we have too many mental defects to be utilized. Symptoms of our instability began showing after puberty and as such none of us we're ever "recruited" into the program. We were left alone and forgotten, until some of us started losing it.

The first episode that I'm aware of is pretty much a national tragedy that marked a new era of fear in American schools. After that I've searched for every other incident that fit the profile. There have been several others that I'm aware of but now I've found something even more disturbing...

Someone has decided we can no longer be left as loose ends. In the past month there have been 129 accidental or unsolved deaths of those born on military bases from january to june of 1982. Records I was able to retrieve indicate there are approximately 7,000 test subjects scattered across the country.

If you have a small circular birthmark on your left temple, it's not a birthmark. It's scarring from the injections. They know who you are. They're coming for you. Get off the grid while you can.

it sounds like the plot for a tv show...

 

[Onyx Oblivion]

1. It'd likely be some guy.
2. Curl into fetal position and accept fate.
3. Die.

 

[Silver]

I'm going to go with the evil corporation thing and say that EA, Valve, Bethesda, Bioware or Rockstar put the hit on me, whoever didn't hire me themselves, because it wouldn't happen right now, because no one would have a reason to, at least not anyone who knew enough about me. Some people on this forum want to be seen as complete nutjobs and might do it by mistake after I angered one of them.

In the first scenario I'd find my own employer, and tell them to protect me. I'd also take whatever precautions I could myself.

In the second scenario, whoever managed to find a hitman to send after me would either find a very bad one, and then I'd set a trap and kick their ass, or an extremely good one, who's devoted to their mission to an insane level (because only those two would be available to get to me, anyone who lives around here would be a pretty lousy amateur (our most famous serial killer killed a single person, and tried to kill 7 more or something, but they all survived), or an extremely dedicated fuckjob willing to travel a lot). In that case I'd die, probably found in my own trap so it looked like I was being stupid. Then whoever hired it would be killed as well, because not many people here could afford a super hitman.

 

[RanD00M]

Opeth only brings people together.

As does Liam Neeson...[/quote]

So.Liam Neeson + Opeth = World Peace?

 

[dietpeachsnapple]

I don't know who would want me dead, however if someone was coming to get me I would get in my car, speed to michigan, and take cover at my grandparents house.
sounds like a weak stronghold but really its the safest place I know it has
1: only one entrance and a simple floor-plan
2: a gun cabinet
3: Guns
4: Ammo
5: Grandmas cooking (yum)

Oddly, this sounds quite similar to a 'zombie defense' plan.

How will your Grandma respond to you being marked for death? She isn't going to offer them cookies or anything when they bust through the door, right?

yea this is pretty much my "If I'm in any sort of danger that I can't deal with on my own plan"

As for my grandma offering them food, it would make a good distraction while everyone else sneaks behind them with assorted blunt (or quite sharp and pointy) weapons.

This brings me to the Alzheimer's vs. lucid grandmother scenarios.

"Grams! I am being hunted down like a dog!"

"Oh dear! I think I left the dog outside! Honey, will you bring sherman inside?"

"GRAMS!! Sherman has been dead for 15 years!"

"Nonesense! And what has you in such a tizzy anyhow?!"

"Grams! I am being hunted down like a dog!"

"Oh dear! I think I left the dog outside! Honey, will you bring sherman inside?"

[repeat]

OR!!!!!!

"Grams! I am being hunted down like a dog!"

"Well, then we shall simply have to give those fiends a proper lesson in violence!"

"What?"

"Harold! Get the land mines!"

[from the other rooms]

"Right away dear!"

[you] *gulp*

*They show up*

*bust through the door*

*see your Grams with an AK-47*

"Might I recommend pissing yourself, followed by a course of praying to your impotent God!"

*Unloads on the baddies*

 

[Pimppeter2]

Probably an exgirlfriend

Wait in my room with a gun

(You never said he if he knows that I know)

 

[Deleted]

The crazy guy obsessed with knives a my school. I knew he would try to get me one day. I would set up a fake me sitting in a room alone and as they stab it it explodes, killing them.

 

[G-Dragon]

to quote my tae kwon do instructor after seeing my sword collection "mike, i pity anyone who breaks into your house"

the person who would be trying to kill me would probably be someone from another tkd school who i beat in a tournament, and (as recently implied) i would simply wait with a sword in hand for them to come through my door and *insert noise for being sliced in the skull* no more problem

 

[StonkThis]

I dunno who would try and kill me... Seriously... I have like, no big enemies... So, in the most likely case, the president of Infinity Ward. He'd be like "HE R MAKEING PPL LEAVE MW 2 CUZ OF AWSOMNES, KEEL." And I'd be like "Not on my watch." Then I would wait by the stairs, shotgun with heartbeat sensor. Plant claymores, avoid windows, keep knife handy. Then he'll walk up the stairs and I'll be like "ROFLPOONSNAKECOPTERLAWL." Meaning, "Why hello my worthy adversary, too bad you tripped my claymore and I shot you and knifed you at the same time! Good day *Slow motion walk away into sunset even though I'm inside*" The End.

Don't take that seriously. I get bored. I suck at MW 2 also.

 

[cheese_wizington]

Make assmassive lolcat pictures (like the size of the side of a house) and put them along the road that leads to my home to by myself time.

Then call the police.

 

[s001911]

I am an aussie, your assuming someone actually cared enough to do something...