Stereotype yourself!

[dantheman931]

So there I was, indulging my favorite pastimes of cleaning my many, many guns and failing to find Europe on a map, when I suddenly had a thought: Maybe one way to foster understanding with other cultures is to try poking fun at one's own. Needless to say, the thought took me by surprise and I ended up spitting Big Mac chunks all over myself and my ten illegitimate children who are all named after potato fixins. (Luckily I had twelve more standing by, plus a diet Coke, so I was okay.)

So let's hear it. What sets your culture apart from everyone else's? (Not that it matters, of course, Murrica being the bestest country and all, but you get my point.) Note that you shouldn't make fun of anyone else's culture, just your own; this is supposed to be fun, not mean.

 

[zerzxes]

Underground Black metal artist. Just that I'm not really satanic...

 

[Blackmagic1515]

I suppose Fangirl would be the best one for me...

 

[Ophiuchus]

What a spiffing idea old chap, I just had to put down my tea and crumpets to make a contribution.

This afternoon I must take my bowler hat to the dry-cleaners, before a wonderful evening down by the Thames drinking fine ales, eating fish and chips and talking about what's going on in the football and cricket. Splendid!

(For what it's worth: the 'drinking ale somewhere in the vicinity of the Thames' thing is actually going to happen this evening IRL.)

 

[Communist partisan]

Classic hardcore punker or skinhead whithout the bomber jacket and my head isn't shaved I have a mohawk and I don't have the rasist opinions.

 

[Kollega]

Well, i'm Russian - so of course i'm a six-foot tall manly man with huge muscles and even bigger beard who speaks broken English in a ridiculous accent, drinks nothing but VODKA, lives in a drab concrete building smack in the middle of a perpetual snowstorm, rides a bear to his job at the tank factory, has a nuclear reactor in his bathroom, and wants to take away everyone's freedom in the name of COMMUNISM.

That was so easy it wasn't even fun. [small]If you want to know: everything above is a complete and utter baloney, bar the fact that my building really is made of concrete. It's about 25-30C in here, i don't drink and don't plan to, speak English rather well, have neither beard nor muscles, and have very low opinion of USSR. There are no bears and no tank factories to be found anywhere near my city. And of course i don't have my own nuclear reactor, which kinda sucks when i think about it.[/small]

Good idea for a thread, by the way - although some people seem to be missing the point.

 

[Cyanin]

Sitting in my tenement conveniently located next to a forest of leprechauns i saw this topic. After grabbing the nearest Guinness from my father, (he treats all 8 of us Catholic dóte báins so well) i tried to think of what makes us Irish. While thinking my brother Éamon clubbed a Protestant to death with a hurl and we danced to tin-whistles and bodhrans. Outside my window are the sights of hundreds of gloriously fire-haired men and women hugging the shade, protecting their freckled skin from the harsh light.

Hmmm, i think i could've done better and i may be leaving somethings out, but that's about it.. Woo irish pride.

 

[The Procrastinated End]

Well after getting that Swastika tattoo, I decided that me and the rest of my blond friends should go out and kill some Jews while hailing Hitler. Then we decided to go get massively drunk and angry.
(German, and no I'm not blond.)

 

[Blandman]

Well, I had rather the same idea as that good old chap Ophiuchus, but with rather more babbling about times long gone and generally living in the past, yearning for a bygone time of power and glory.

Then I might go down to see the boys play a spiffing good game of gentleman's Football, before having a jolly good round of fisty-cuffs to round up the day!

What-what.

 

[The Amazing Tea Alligator]

I'm an art/computer nerd. But I'm Canadian so that means that I ride a moose everywhere, need to be wary of the polar bears, and but maple syrup on everything. I live in an igloo, and I say 'eh' a lot.

Not really, except the moose part.

 

[PAGEToap44]

Well I'm Scottish, so I have to be a bagpipe-playing, haggis-eating, kilt-wearing, hairy guy with a pale complexion who watches Braveheart a bit too often.

And I wasn't being sarcastic... that really is me.

 

[viranimus]

"The man" you know the one, whos keeping everyone else down. Yeah, that guy

 

[Crystalite]

well, verdammt!
This thread actually just interupted my meal of two pounds Sauerkraut with two pints Beer and my plan to go invading some random country afterwards!
Just waiting for my boyfriend to come home from practicing goosestepping around the block and shouting harshly at people.
Aaaaaaachtung!

Well, i'm Russian - so of course i'm a six-foot tall manly man with huge muscles and even bigger beard who speaks broken English in a ridiculous accent, drinks nothing but VODKA, lives in a drab concrete building smack in the middle of a perpetual snowstorm, rides a bear to his job at the tank factory, has a nuclear reactor in his bathroom, and wants to take away everyone's freedom in the name of COMMUNISM.

Could we swap?
This sounds so awesome! ;-)

 

[MagicMouse]

Redneck/Geek.

Yes, it is possible.

 

[El Poncho]

Och aye, me an' we Jimmy wiz doon by the Loch catching Haggis tae eat fir oor dinner, it wiz perfect weather, the rain wiz only pourin' doon a wee bit. Ah got mah ginger hair aw wet since I left mah bonnet hat back at the hoose, good thing a didnae forget mah kilt that widve been embarrassin'! Too bad there wizny any bloody English bastard fir mae tae bludgeon. On the way back we picked up some phenomenal Irn-Bru.

 

[Ophiuchus]

Alternatively to my post above, we'll ignore the British thing and go for the stereotype of which bit I'm specifically from:

"Awright geezer! Faaaackin' 'ell, Fridey, bes' day o' da week innit! Gonna jump in me Fawd Fiestah an' drive daahn da boozer, 'av sum Stella innit... any cahnt looks at me funny I'll get ma boys an' we go bash dat mug, ya get me blaaaaad, bes' watch ahhhht."

I'm actually worryingly proud of my Essex roots, but... yeah, that's pretty much an accurate portrayal of a Friday night 'daaah taaahn'. Luckily I have a bit of education to go with the gutter accent.

 

[Kollega]

Could we swap?
This sounds so awesome! ;-)

NEVAR, YOO BOORJEOUISE FASCHIST IMPIERIALIEST SWAIN!!!

[small]And it isn't really "awesome" - in fact, it all sucks except for bear cavalry and nuclear heating. Why do you think i love[/small] VODKA [small]so much?[/small]