Stop being an outcast?

[MelziGurl]

Keep doing what you are doing. You are better than them and that is all there is to it. Don't show that you care, hopefully they will get bored and more on. And if they laugh at you, laugh with them and enjoy the looks of "wtf" on their faces when you do. Seriously, they will probably end up the losers in life.

 

[Galletea]

Be happy with who you are. School is not the rest of your life, just be confident and talk to people, try and keep up your old frendships. People your age are often immature and malicious, but it's not like that all the way through, the first few years are often the worse, and then it gets better.

 

[TheCheryl]

I was an outcast from second grade until highschool. Then I really absorbed myself heavy into art. Got with this odd hybrid group that consisted of art folk, music majors, and the strange sub groups related to them. We were a whole mish-mash, a delightful mix. In the end I got damn good at art, won awards for my school and basically got set in the alternative popular group. I owned that art room's clay works area in the end until I graduated. Mmm... Sweet art tyranny. Good times, good times

Really, make up your mind that you want to socialize, find something you're real good at, find out if there's a group or club, join it and make friends, then from there find out related groups and befriend those. Bullying only lass as long as you let it. I started fighting back verbally; pretty much made the jerks sound like morons for messing with me. Others I acted friendly towards whether they liked it or not.

It's psychological. If you really want to, you can get yourself out of this rut, and that's exactly what it is, a rut. And you can make things better for yourself. If you act friendly and open people are going to have a harder time being mean to you without looking like total pricks. Play things by ear though. We all here can throw advice at you until we get carpal tunnel. We're giving a loose blueprint, fit it to your situation. But no, the ones suggesting violence really aren't giving you real good advice. All I learned from hitting back is that they'll start hitting you worse.

 

[101194]

I was okay at my school, Some people just want to give you shit because they can't really say that your a good friend, So you give them shit for somthing silly and laugh about it. Its Junior highschool shit. Usually you just need to read between the lines, Only reason kids pick on kids is to boost there own personal image higher. Don't get cocky and start throwing punches because they group together and beat your ass.

 

[Iron Mal]

I sorta had the same problem as the OP back at secondary school.

Making yourself more sociable is by no means an easy task and there is no simple method or guarenteed path, all you have to do is haphazardly hurl yourself into social situations more regularly (I don't literally mean hurl yourself...that could cause problems and injury in the long run).

If you make an ass of yourself on any occasion, fuck it, it's going to happen every now and then and most people probably won't remember it past the weekend (in short, try to posess a certain amount of 'blind optimism').

 

[Ignignoct]

I'll admit..I'm a loser and a geek
That being said, I'm a huge outcast at school. I had a few friends but even those are starting to desert me. I'm made fun of and ridiculed constantly for such things as reading rather than talking during class when work is done. People will go out of their way to trip me, punch me, and make fun of me. Needless to say I want this to end.
So I'd like to know, what can I do to stop all of this from happening and stop being an outcast.

You're still in school, so snitch to your teachers.

When they retaliate for you snitching on em, snitch on them again. Keep it up, it's the only game you can play at the moment.

If that doesn't work, pull the suicidal-due-to-bullying card, since that's a real winner these days, but shouldn't be your FIRST resort. Having a good relationship with your teachers will get you far, which you should already have, since kids with good grades are often held in high regard by teachers.

Don't go on a shooting rampage, satisfying though it might be, because that ruins your job opportunities later in life.

Much <3 for my fellow nerds.

Hang in there.

 

[vfaulkon]

Yes don't try to fit into stereotypes. My friend is one of the smartest kids in my school, but also the most popular. He is incredibly athletic and strong as well, so that could go along with what someone else said about getting buffed up.

This. Just because you're smart doesn't mean you have to be a nerd. And if you ARE a nerd, there's no reason that you can only be a nerd, y'see what I mean?

And, as it has been said, dicks will be dicks regardless, and high school is FULL of dicks. Always has been, always will be. My advice - if you can't beat 'em, and you don't wanna join 'em, fuck 'em. Do your best to survive high school and get to college, which will be better - no one cares if you're a nerd there, so the torture, blatant and otherwise, will end.

Hang tough, fellow book-reader!

 

[Pigeon_Grenade]

i was Picked on when i was Younger, till my Entire Class was Convinced i was insane( i tried stabbing a classmate with a Pencil when he tried stealing my backpack in art.)

 

[Reaperman Wompa]

i was Picked on when i was Younger, till my Entire Class was Convinced i was insane( i tried stabbing a classmate with a Pencil when he tried stealing my backpack in art.)

If you do this (pretend to be insane) expect people to avoid you like crazy, which you may or may not like. Also, you have to go for the actual stab, probably in the leg, a tap and you look like an idiot too deep and you get to see a psychiatrist.

 

[Bourne Endeavor]

Went through that the vast majority of my public high school life; quite similar to what you have stated, just add the occasional completely one-sided fight and teacher hell. Anyhow I decided one day that I would forgo my personality at the time (shy, no confidence or self esteem, took everything to heart and etc) and build confidence. It took some time however I noticed people having a change attitude, simply because I refused to allow myself to be bothered, and even began to use the insult to bounce it off something else (often myself) to get a laugh.

Building confidence can be difficult however go into it like you were on a diet or building muscle. It is not something you can accomplish in a night or even a month. It takes time to throw away your pervious reaction and build a strong more assertive persona, one that you like. If can accept that and are willing to battle through the slow steps to reach the goal, than you are on your way. Just let things roll off, crack a joke (even making fun of yourself as I mentioned I did) and generally be aloof. I went to the extreme and no longer give a damn about anyone (within reason), I like it.

Unfortunately while this helped significantly, losers will be losers and those types of people are unavoidable in high school. Find yourself a few good friends, even just one that are without question your true friends and just stick with them; taking solace in the fact High School is a few years of your life and you will be on to brighter and better things, and quite likely better then those whom thought humiliating you was entertaining.

Edit: Fighting solves nothing (Bah, I hate saying that however I must dammit!) It is a barbaric waste of time and while it might be fun to fantasize whooping evey single person that dare call you a name, Chuck Norris style. Keep it in the fantasy world, where it belongs, fighting will not help whatsoever. Of course stand up for yourself, just do not go picking fights.

 

[Arcticflame]

You are 14 if you profile is to be trusted. Things will get better. Just make sure that you don't think the worlds out to get you when people finally wise up as they do around 17/18, or it wont be other people making you the outcast, it will be you.

 

[SmartIdiot]

Don't allow yourself to be victimised, fight back, have more confidence in yourself. I skimmed through the advice on here so far, some good, some awful. Don't wait in the hopes that one day one of these bastards will be bagging your groceries, it takes too long and you could get hit by a bus tomorrow. Don't snitch either as teachers are useless when it comes to this kind of thing. Take action TODAY. Just go about your life doing what you do but don't take ANY shit from ANYONE. You can do that and still succeed in achieving your personal goals aswell. Also people will have more respect for you when they can see that you actively stand up for yourself, perhaps not everyone as some really are just too moronic to get it, but who cares about that minority?

 

[RyantheLion]

I know its corny but whatever doesn't kill you does make you stronger, lots of people made fun of me in high school and tried to start shit. Whatever happens if your able to get up just dust yourself off go back to what you were doing. If you like reading instead of talking to a bunch of dumbasses good for you. I don't know if that will work for you but thats what I did good luck to ya dude.

 

[Epifols]

And don't forget, just because you're not friends with someone anymore, doesn't mean they abandoned you or anything. People make relationships and drop them naturally, people just fade apart. No sense being upset about that. Now if someone is being a ***** to you, this is not the case.

 

[VaioStreams]

You are 14 if you profile is to be trusted. Things will get better. Just make sure that you don't think the worlds out to get you when people finally wise up as they do around 17/18, or it wont be other people making you the outcast, it will be you.

agreed. When i was in high school which was....oh hell 8 years ago, i was (and still am) a geek/nerd and back in the late 90's early 2000s. being a geek/nerd was a bad thing. unlike now how it seems to be the "In" thing. so we really got it. what i did to get through it was passion myself in a way no one would think to screw with me. you don't need to be violent, mean or anything. Use your brain. you're a geek for love of god. out smart them. dig up info and use it. there's more then one way to skin a jock.

 

[li-ion]

I'll admit..I'm a loser and a geek

You're 14, you have your life ahead, not behind you. Nobody's a looser with 14 unless you talk yourself into that. Then it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. So stop that.

That being said, I'm a huge outcast at school. I had a few friends but even those are starting to desert me. I'm made fun of and ridiculed constantly for such things as reading rather than talking during class when work is done.

For most people time at school is terrible. Being caught somewhere between dreams, nightmares and insecurity. I don't know anyone who hasn't been bullied by someone during his time in school. The bullies I know from my school usually had troubles at home and vented their anger at people who were weaker at that time. Preferably on those who just let it happen.

I disagree with people here who say you should resort to violence, because you probably loose there unless you work out a lot. Trying to beat a bully on his own terms is very difficult. But you should defend yourself, then they probably look for an 'easier target'. But don't get after anyone with a bat, sharp object or any other weapon. This leads more likely to escalation than to a solution for your problem. When the bullies suddenly surround you with bats of their own it's getting nasty.

Do you do any sports? I would start some martial arts if I were in your position. Not for beating the crap out of people (well, maybe to a certain part ;-)) but to learn to know yourself better. I started Tae Kwon Do when I was 13, which helped me getting more aware of myself, self-confident and learn how to handle myself in a fight if I really, really have no other option.
Beside this you should see if there is some team-sport you might like. Playing in a sports team helps getting social with people, since you have at least some common interest. But don't force yourself in some sport you don't feel comfortable with!
For venting stress and frustration playing some drums also works very good, or in my case bass guitar.

But don't start some crazy stuff just to please someone. It's better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you aren't. Sounds harsh, but you shouldn't try to be someone you are not. This might help short term, but makes you unhappy in the long run.

 

[L33tsauce_Marty]

You give them nothing to make fun of. You make them realize that there is a reason why you want to read instead of talk. I made a clear ass statment when I started high school that I wasn't going to put up with that sort of bullshit, maybe I'm a bit better of than most people but just make it clear, you don't give a shit what they think.

 

[VaioStreams]

You give them nothing to make fun of. You make them realize that there is a reason why you want to read instead of talk. I made a clear ass statment when I started high school that I wasn't going to put up with that sort of bullshit, maybe I'm a bit better of than most people but just make it clear, you don't give a shit what they think.

Pork Chop Sandwiches!!!!

 

[Scarecrow38]

When there's an arena change: transition to high school, college, university you get a fresh start. Either wait it out until then or stop being an easy target. Someone suggested getting some muscle on ya and that's pretty good outside the box thinking actually. The thing is to not look like an easy target. Pretending it doesn't affect you won't work, having to rely on someone else is a temporary patch but won't work always. You have to be someone who'll fight back against them. I'm not saying to go smacking everyone down but you need to be able to handle yourself (which getting fit and stuff would help).

There's also the chance that, as time passes people just drop it. Depends though, for some it does for others it does not.

 

[Daniosislestat]

ive been there before my friend, i was like that in high school, however you have to remember, 9/10 the "geeks" "nerds" and "freaks" generally tend toe be the smart ones who get decent jobs while all those guys and girls who spend their time obsessing over how to make someone else's day worse than it needs to be have to master the phrase "do you want fries with that"

All in all, wait it out, and just ignore them, they will get their just deserts, as my old man said to me once, be careful who you sh*t on on the way up, as you never know who you'll be passing on the way down

hope this provided some comfort

-Danny-