Stuff you thought when you were a Kid

[Woodsey]

I didn't think women were allowed to smoke, and I didn't think adults could cry. I also questioned the existence of people on TV.

The first two have been proven wrong. I remain skeptical on the latter.

For a long time I thought snow came from the rings of Saturnus.
A teacher told my class that. She apparently didn't know six year olds(might've been five) doesn't really get sarcasm.

I think I'll throw in a competing anecdote for dumbest teacher on the face of the earth, thanks.

Challenge accepted.

I had a royal ***** of an old hag as a replacement teacher for a few months when I was about 10; I remember someone asking her why sheep had wool (no idea why they asked it), to which she replied, "because God made them that way". Then she stood up and walked off.

 

[krugerrand123]

I thought that traffic tickets you get allowed you to see a play.

I also thought that there were sentient beings living in the center of the earth that had their own society.

 

[A Satanic Panda]

I thought when actors ( i knew they were act ) on tv died , they died for real . So i thought that when some guy got shot and died , he was asked before lhand if he wanted to die and he said yes .

Edit: so basically i was always afraid of watching a tv show where someone died ( my mom watches soap operas like crazy) i thought i was witnessing an actual murder.

Wow that is pretty bad, I have to say i feel really sorry for you. Must of traumatized you a fair bit.

I had the same notion with Godzilla. I thought that every time I watched a Godzilla movie, that he would actually go and destroy Tokyo; and they just rebuilt the whole city before I could watch it again.

And speaking of Godzilla, I thought the sole purpose of the military was to beat that over grown lizard [sub]this is going to make my day.[/sub]

Man, I miss being 4...

 

[A Raging Emo]

I used to think that, when playing a game with AI, that the developers actually employed people to play the game with you, specifically, which is why they all had the same names in-game each time.

 

[TwiZtah]

I had this notion that running and falling and scraping your knee was something every kid did once and never again, like the chickenpox.

also, I thought that tonsilitus meant you had a tornado in your throat, the swedish name for it kind of sounds like tornado

 

[Elementary - Dear Watson]

Yep. Lost every single time

and what did your significant other say about your attempt at some comatose action?

Well I woke up half way through, very confused... I had aparently woken her up, she said after that I initiated it... but all I remember is waking up half way through... pretty decent feeling though... felt damn refreshed in the morning!

 

[Smeatza]

I was once watching a certain James Bond film with my dad. It had just reached a point in the movie where James Bond swapped his wallet with somone he had just killed to make a third party think he was dead.
At this point I noticed the actor of Mr. Bond was different to what I was used to and said to my dad,
"That's not James Bond."
To which he responded,
"No, they swapped wallets."

I spent the next 5 or so years believing that you could swap lives with somebody, simply by swapping wallets with them.

 

[Sealpower]

I thought Jesus was a really poor bloke who still managed to get a lot done in the few months between christmas and easter he lived...


Needless to say I found christianity quite wierd bach then. I guess some things doesn't change.



Captcha: have fun , sure thing I will

 

[Megawat22]

I used to think that urinals were weird sinks. I never washed my hands in a urinal though, because I didn't wash my hands when I was that age (I know better now, honest).
I also thought that all the dinosaurs lived underground. I was kinda right.
And finally, I thought that if I didn't sleep with the covers all the way up or if I put my arm or leg above them that a bunch of guys with hoods would know I was awake and kill me. I still don't like going above the covers to this day.

 

[MarsProbe]

Whne I was very young, I believed that each of my friends and their families lived on a different planet. That was way back when my total view of the world was slightly limited, so i thought this person had their house on the moon, while this other person had their house on Mars etcetc.

That wouldn't explain how one was able to travel to these peoples houses so quickly, mind.

That and the thing someone else mentioned about not getting changed in front of the tv, in case the people on tv were able to see you getting changed.

 

[eyesonflux]

I used to think when moon was visible during the day that it was a counterpart for earth, i thought that there were cities and oceans up there people looking at us, it was a sad day when i was told that it was the same moon that i saw during the night.

 

[Platypus540]

I thought that 12 was the highest number. No clue where I got that idea from. Maybe clocks?

 

[Signa]

I remember drinking a cup of apple juice when I was 3 or 4, and noticing how the liquid had just literally disappeared when I finished. I then began to wonder why anyone would ever drown if they could just drink whatever they were swimming in.

 

[gazumped]

I was convinced that there was a monster who'd come up and try and grab me when I flushed the toilet (I think maybe I thought the flushing noise was the monster roaring or something?) so once I flushed I'd flee down the stairs to cower in the living room for a bit.

Also, although I had a vague understanding that babies came from physical intimacy between a male and a female, when a little boy put his hand down my knickers when I was five I went crying to the teacher because I was scared that he made me pregnant.

I was generally fairly clued up, though, my mum would set me straight on most things, wouldn't try to tell me that Father Christmas existed or whatever. She got really angry when a teacher told me that the rumbling in my tummy was little soldiers marching up and down inside me when I was four.

I didn't think the black and white thing was so common, I thought it was just a Calvin and Hobbes joke! http://www.reoiv.com/images/random/dadbandwandcolour.jpg

 

[MinimanZombie]

Well one of my childhood thoughts was from when I was very young, about three I think. I basically thought that if I got water on my hearing aids, I would die (if I was wearing them). I mean I had to take them out anyway, or else they'd be ruined. This was disproved when I dived into a swimming pool, forgetting to take them out. I did however manage to convince everyone that this was true. Another thing was that I'd run around the house jumping on chairs and the table if I ate a banana. I think this was because people referred to me as a cheeky monkey. Maybe I though I really was a hairless chimp.

 

[floppylobster]

I thought if I turned my back a giant spider would jump up and attach itself to my back. I got the idea from watching a Doctor Who episode Planet of the Spiders (where just that happens). The consequences were that whenever I took a piss standing up in the toilet, I had to leave the door open and keep looking over my shoulder.

I also feared the blob would come under a crack in the door and swallow me so I sat in the middle of rooms whenever I could.

Most of my childhood assumptions were linked to self-preservation.

 

[Les Awesome]

When I Was 6 I had Bad Eczema on my Legs
I always thought It was a Scar from a Shark Bite

 

[Reginald the Butler]

I remember always hating long car rides and wondered why the government didn't just build long glass tubes (sorta like those from Futurama) to take us from city to city.