Stupidist things youve heard people say

[gritch]

Back in elementary school, I believe it was 3rd grade, I overheard two girls discussing mathematics. The conversation basically boiled down to this statement "2 x 2 = 4 and 2 x 3 = 5. Math is soo easy!" Granted we were all young but they should have definitely been old enough to understand the difference between multiplication and addition especially since we had gone over this countless times in class. I remember the 8 year old me just sitting there for several minutes shaking my head in disbelief.

 

[maninahat]

My girlfriend and I were eating at a restaurant, and we had vouchers for 20% off.
"It'll be cheaper if we pay separately," she says.
"Why?"
"If we pay together, it's only 20% off. But if we pay separately, we get 20% off each!"

I should mention she's a cancer research scientist, working at Oxford.

EDIT:

Thought of something more stupid. Some guy claimed that if you fall out of an aeroplane, you should grab hold of the ground when you hit it, because it's the bounce that kills you.

 

[maninahat]

One man once asked me: "How long does it take to upload a video on Youtube?"
Me: "This is the most stupid thing I've ever read."
He: "Why?"
Me: "This is the second most stupid thing I've ever read."

That seems like a fair enough question to me. Not everyone is tech savvy. Certainly the average layman probably doesn't know the ins and outs of how the Internet works.

I still don't get it - how long does a video take to upload onto youtube?

 

[Mr Companion]

My friend had a collage lesson where he ended up rambling a bit and the American student in the class said "speak American please". We live in England, everybody laughed at him naturally.

 

[Zanderinfal]

"9/11 was orchestrated by the American Government."
-Many hundreds of conspiracy theorists.

Gahhhhh, FUCK OFF! Even if I cared enough about that subject, I'd still argue that it's not true.

 

[chinangel]

"FULL METAL ALCHEMIST IS SUCH A WONDERFUL ANIME FULL OF BRIGHT COLOURS. NOBODY DIES AND I REALLY LIKE THAT MAE HUGHES GUY AND THAT LITTLE GIRL WITH HER DOG!"

this was someone's post on facebook. I'm serious.

Oh gods...oh dear gods I wish I could've been there for *those* episodes. You know the ones I mean.

 

[Tyler Trahan]

In an Advanced Placement United States History class... "Where's canada?" also "Woah wait, JFK was shot?!". Same girl, same effect in that I nearly passed out every time she opened her damn mouth

 

[Morpheu5]

Couple of years ago I was in the local supermarket with my 3yo daughter. We were at the deli and I had just finished explaining to my youngun to be careful of the glass where the roast chickens etc are, as it is very hot. Anyhoo, a little old lady with little old lady wrinkley legs and soforth is standing beside us. My little girl, bless her soul, walks up to the senior citizen, gently grabs her by the hand, and, full of concern, says "Excuse me lady, you might want to step back from the glass. I think your legs are melting." Thankfully, the sweet old thing got as much of a giggle from this as i did.

 

[chinangel]

Yeah you're probably right. but still it's a funny thought.

 

[Vault101]

Anyone who uses the term "african american" to describe themselves eventhough they were born in America. Your just American regardless if your black. If your African born and come to America, then your an African American. Overall the term is stupid, in the UK we dont say a person is African British.

actually I thourght it was a completly valid way of identifying somones racial lineage, like white people being called "anglo saxon"

"black people" doesnt sound as good

 

[Xan Krieger]

"America should ban guns"
Many people nowadays and I facepalm every single time. Hadn't heard something that stupid since my former boss said he didn't believe in dinosaurs.

 

[majes]

"Estonia? Where in Texas is that?"
A fan at a bowl game when informed that the star SMU defensive player was from Estonia.
It's in Eastern Europe btw.

 

[Mocmocman]

I have a friend who's sister ended a report on Hitler with the phrase "Everyone makes mistakes."

 

[scorptatious]

"Why would someone go on the internet and tell lies?" After a friends girlfriend had seen a fake trailer for Titanic 2.
She didn't 100% say that, but something along those lines.

That reminds me of this:


OT: My brother says a lot of dumb things. I'd rather not list them right now as he is currently in the room with me.

>_>....<_<

 

[DrunkOnEstus]

My ex-girlfriend, while we were watching Pocahontas: "Why doesn't Pocahontas have a dot on her forehead?"
Me: "What do you mean, why would she?"
Her: "She's an Indian, right? Don't Indian chicks put dots on their foreheads?"

...yeah.

 

[XIGBARx13]

One of the girls in our group of friends has dropped plenty of gems throughout high school. Here are some of the classics:
- "Wait... babies cry in different languages?"
- Believing that there was a train that ran between the US and Spain
- Suggesting that we could all live on the moon... if we completely covered it in bubble wrap first