Muffaletta. NOLA does it right: ham, mortadella, Genoa salami, provolone, mozzarella, and MOST IMPORTANTLY tapenade (olive mix). I'm not picky about the bread, but I can never get enough of these:
A close second favorite is the "Cuban" -- ham, pulled pork (or sliced pork chop), pickles, mustard, provolone, and don't forget to butter the bread before you toast it.
If this doesn't make you hungry, we're definitely not related.
As far as sweet sandwiches go, PB & banana or PB&J with raspberry preserves are the best.
If you'd asked me all of this when I was in elementary school, though, I would just have told you to put pepperoni, pickles, and Dorito's together on white bread because there's no finer combination in the culinary world. Try it sometime. Thank my 8-year-old self later.
Pickle, cheese, whatever salad you can tolerate, chutney, cheese.
Preferably two different types of cheese, sweet chutney. Lightly toasted bread.
And with proper cheese god-damn it.
That stuff can fuck right off. It has no self respect. Chuck it.
What you want something like:
Layer it so that the sweeter cheese is with the pickle, the sharper cheese with the chutney.
Do not under any circumstances grate the cheese. This is something that supermarkets do to steal our souls. They say that it improves the flavour. This is a lie.
Cut rough wedges of cheese to keep the rest of the stuff in the sandwich. If the thicker bits of the cheese wedges are thinner than the rest of the filling combined, you're doing it wrong.
And in the end, if you manage to pick it up in one piece without it collapsing, you are victorious and may claim your prize!
How dare you compare those sugary desserts such as PB&J's to sandwiches? Real sandwich is 100% rye bread of course, the harder the better. White bread (or French pastry as I call it) is for babies and the toothless elderly, those who are sadly physically incapable of handling the magnificence of the royal rye bread. Then add some real cheese, like the ones OneCatch mentioned. After that it's all fair game: juicy steak, fresh vegetables, greasy bacon, crispy chicken, as long as you don't go spoiling the flavors with tons of mayonnaise.
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