Escapists, let's hear your moments of pure Epic. Epic that requires a capital E. When you could stand up and do your best Spartan roar and in return you drown in panties.
Alright, I'll start us off well. I used to do a lot of silly things when I used to drink every day. Very, very silly things. I go to a huge party to the worst fraternity in our university. Dudes famous for nothing but roofies and vomit buckets. Truly great people, the exact kind you'd love to introduce your girlfriend to.
So this party is alright, I'm already well and buzzed on Red Stag (a black cherry whiskey for those who do not know) and I was blending in with my chosen wall. My room mate, a very Dukes of Hazzard kind of guy, was hitting on one of their girlfriends. I rolled my eyes and kept to myself, I didn't need to interject. It's not like he would have listened. The guy was like my unruly younger brother.
Needless to say, it got heavy really fast. I mean really fast. Dodged a flung bottle as soon as the guy stormed in. People began to swarm. Zerg frat rush. God, I am too nerdy for this. Instantly, instincts kick in, I shield Rick's back while he dips out the door and we take off. Two versus twenty? I don't think so. I won't have any part of that. Rick slides into the car (Like I said, Dukes of Hazzard. It was pretty funny given the circumstances)
Two broke through the door as Rick got there before me. Seriously, fuck sprinters. They ran abreast. A crazy idea struck me. Struck me hard. Oh, I'm just whiskey'd up enough to make this work.
As they ran up, I ran towards them.
Jumped.
Flung out both legs.
Double. Chest. Kick. At the same time. Bolted into the car and sped off laughing like I've never laughed before. "DID YOU JUST SEE THAT?" "DUDE OH MY GOD THAT WAS AWESOME!"
It was stupid. It wasn't legal. It was Epic.
Let's hear your tales, Escapists. I want to gog in disbelief.
Alright, I'll start us off well. I used to do a lot of silly things when I used to drink every day. Very, very silly things. I go to a huge party to the worst fraternity in our university. Dudes famous for nothing but roofies and vomit buckets. Truly great people, the exact kind you'd love to introduce your girlfriend to.
So this party is alright, I'm already well and buzzed on Red Stag (a black cherry whiskey for those who do not know) and I was blending in with my chosen wall. My room mate, a very Dukes of Hazzard kind of guy, was hitting on one of their girlfriends. I rolled my eyes and kept to myself, I didn't need to interject. It's not like he would have listened. The guy was like my unruly younger brother.
Needless to say, it got heavy really fast. I mean really fast. Dodged a flung bottle as soon as the guy stormed in. People began to swarm. Zerg frat rush. God, I am too nerdy for this. Instantly, instincts kick in, I shield Rick's back while he dips out the door and we take off. Two versus twenty? I don't think so. I won't have any part of that. Rick slides into the car (Like I said, Dukes of Hazzard. It was pretty funny given the circumstances)
Two broke through the door as Rick got there before me. Seriously, fuck sprinters. They ran abreast. A crazy idea struck me. Struck me hard. Oh, I'm just whiskey'd up enough to make this work.
As they ran up, I ran towards them.
Jumped.
Flung out both legs.
Double. Chest. Kick. At the same time. Bolted into the car and sped off laughing like I've never laughed before. "DID YOU JUST SEE THAT?" "DUDE OH MY GOD THAT WAS AWESOME!"
It was stupid. It wasn't legal. It was Epic.
Let's hear your tales, Escapists. I want to gog in disbelief.
