The Art of Conversation

[cleverlymadeup]

Something that goes beyond the bounds of the following:

"Hey."
"Hi."
"How are you?"
"Not bad, you?"
"Same. You been up to much?"
"No, you?"
"Nope."

...Aaaaaaaand cut.

I mean, why initiate a conversation if that's all it is going to bloody amount to!?

i've had that a few times when someone tries to talk to you, and they expect you to entertain them

or they say "wow this is boring" and then leave, i get pissed cause they started talking to me and expected me to carry the conversation

 

[Duck Sandwich]

I find that the best conversations revolve around random funny crap.

Friend: I hate how damn quiet this bus is
Me: Yeah, we need to get a tumbleweed rolling through here
Friend: You could just throw your waterbottle (I'm holding an empty waterbottle that I just finished drinking)
Me: Yeah, but it would just roll quickly to the back exit door (we're both sitting at the very back of the bus).
Friend:Yeah, and then we open the emergency exit door and it rolls on to the road.
Me: You know what would be funny? If the exit door just opened, and then the bottle just rolled down the road, and some car driver behind us is all like "HOLY SHIT ROLLING DEBRIS!" and then swerves and crashes into a ditch to avoid it. Good times.

 

[Larenxis]

The best conversations are when all participants are excited, fast-moving, and understand each other. The worst is when I have to walk to a bus stop with someone, and they ask one question so I've got to talk to them, but then reply to all my questions with one syllable answers. I don't want to talk a whole bunch because I'm afraid I'll appear self-centered or bore them, but what else is there to do in that situation?

 

[iamnotincompliance]

I find that the best conversations revolve around random funny crap.

I wholeheartedly agree with that statement. Also, you can't go wrong with switching topics completely at random. Some of the best conversations I vaguely remember involve tangent upon tangent until one of you stops and says "... Why the hell are we talking about this?" or, better yet "How the hell did we get here?" That usually transcends into attempting to retrace your steps of how you did indeed get there, rarely resulting in actually figuring it out. Ahh, good times...

 

[Ultrajoe]

The best conversations are when all participants are excited, fast-moving, and understand each other. The worst is when I have to walk to a bus stop with someone, and they ask one question so I've got to talk to them, but then reply to all my questions with one syllable answers. I don't want to talk a whole bunch because I'm afraid I'll appear self-centered or bore them, but what else is there to do in that situation?

act freaky and get them to ask a question

say something that they know you've said wrong and then when they ask act like a total idiot and apologize...

thats Ultrajoe's advice (and he's known for his conversational quickness, admittedly a forum it doesn't work as well)

Act like a fool and put the other person at ease, everyone comes out of their shell for a simpleton, and people tell more things to a fool.
In this specific situation the other person needs a subject they can ramble about, talk about their rivals, they're peeves or their problems and watch them go! Its easy to overwhelm people with conversation, set them off, act like everything they say is new to you and in time you'll know how to push their buttons and soon enough your best pals!

 

[Hey Joe]

My conversations go like this lately

"Hello, my name is James"
"I'm calling the cops"

Admittedly, I'm nude at the time. Maybe this is my problem?

 

[Spacelord]

Actually at my school (Human Resource Management & Psychology) we're taught conversational techniques. If you really want to spark up a conversation, here's a few of the things we're taught:

1. Repetition. By literally repeating (part of) what your itee (= interviewee) says, you can keep him or her going about what you just repeated. For instance: "What did you do this weekend?" "Well, I went to the zoo, and had dinner with a friend..." "Dinner with a friend?" "Yes, it was nice." "It was nice?" "oh yeah, it really was..." --- etc etc.
It's creepy how well this works. Be sure to use this repetition technique in a tentative or evocative voice.

2. Container words. A lot of the time people will use general terms to give you a concise but not entirely honest answer. The harder the question is for someone, the more likely it is you'll get a container word thown back at you. For instance: "How is school?" "All right, I guess.", or: "Do you agree with ?" "Yeah pretty much."
Try and "open up" container words, by asking them to specify on their point of view. for instance: "What do you like in school?" etc. Which brings me to my next point:

3. Never ask "why". Though useful in getting information, the effect of a why-question is your itee answering on a rational level, instead of an emotional level. "Why do you love ice cream", for instance, is a lot harder to answer than "What do you love about ice cream?".

4. Don't assume. It makes an ass out of u and me. XD
This one sounds pretty obvious, but it's really hard not to make assumptions. For instance, when someone says he's a carpenter, you automatically have a frame of reference with that word. You may think he works in construction, or renovation. But for all you know he might make children's furniture. I don't have a better example all right -_-'
To counter this, or at least limit the risk of assumptions, try to respond using the exact words of your itee: "I dislike chocolate." is answered with "What do you dislike about chocolate", rather than "what do you hate about chocolate". Because the word 'hate' may have a different connotation for the itee than it would have for you.



sorry for the long post, I thought it might be relevant.

 

[Necrohydra]

The best conversations are when all participants are excited, fast-moving, and understand each other. The worst is when I have to walk to a bus stop with someone, and they ask one question so I've got to talk to them, but then reply to all my questions with one syllable answers. I don't want to talk a whole bunch because I'm afraid I'll appear self-centered or bore them, but what else is there to do in that situation?

This doesn't go for all situations, but some people like to listen to others more than talk. I fit into this category. And if you should happen onto a subject I know some things about, I might start talking more..but sometimes, I just prefer to listen to the other person talk about something.