The Biggest Joke in Gaming

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Samantha Burt

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uncle_yuri said:
The singleplayer of every CoD since Black Ops.
Hold X to open door.
Hurry and shoot this guy! Don't worry, we'll make it slow motion for you.
Hold X to walk through door.
Hold X to gaze longingly out the window.
Obviously I exaggerate for effect. But still, the amount of contextual button presses that led to uncontrolled pre-animated things was honestly annoying for me. I thus nominate CoD.
I think token game modes in general. When it's quite obvious you're making a game for one particular form of play, don't try to expand it, because then both experiences end up diluted.
 

Chicago Ted

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Racecarlock said:
I did play it, though, and I hated it. I care not for realism as long as I get to do cool things that I can't do in other games. For example Saints Row The Third has the awesome tron level that lets me be a dragon at the end. GTA V has that entire minor turbulence mission.

Mafia II has generic cover shooting, chores, and maybe one mission where you blow up a building. You know, because they weren't aware that red faction guerilla will let you destroy almost everything.
So, by this logic, Goodfellas is a worthless film because it wasn't Transformers.

You are aware that not every game needs to be catered to the extreme ADD crowd right? You know, the ones that can't go forty seconds without something being either shot or blown up without completely losing interest in the game.

Look, you didn't like it, fine, understandable, not for everyone, but painting it as shite just because it wasn't stuffing constant action down your throat is just drivel. Not every game needs to be built up on having the screen constantly filled with the bloom and explosions. Mafia II was slower, yeah, but being slower doesn't automatically mean being worse.
 

KazeAizen

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Xcell935 said:
Specter Von Baren said:
The sales of DmC.
DAMN IT!!! ninja'd.

Well I guess I can just add onto it and say that the development behind DmC was a big joke.
The game's director, Tameem Antoniades, was met with so much negative feedback that a lot of the reboots "original" ideas were completely scraped. He deserved the negative feedback though, he was being a massive dick towards the original fanbase. Worse was he and NT tried to pander towards the original fanbase anyways even though he said weeks after the announcement that "they didn't care".

-Promised an edgier Dante =/="Mad at the world" smoker Donte got shafted, design stayed the same, but persona changed to a somewhat old Dante to pander.
-Promised a more complex style system that would outclass DMC4's =/= Combat was dumbed down, getting SSS was too easy, no taunts, color coordinated enemies...
-Promised an original CANON story with likable characters and original designs =/= Say what you will but the whole cast was boring, story was the plot to "They Live" and had no connection to the originals whatsoever (Theres no Devil May Cry business in Devil May Cry...), and the Devil Trigger was pandering even harder with nothing but a recoloring of the hair and jacket.
-Told the original fanbase to deal with the change =/= Tried selling an alt original Dante skin that changed nothing anyways.
-Capcom was confident NT would handle DMC correctly and professionally =/= NT posts photoshop pictures of Dante with the cast from Brokeback Mountain. How cute NT.
Have fun making iphone games. Thanks for Heavenly Sword though!

As for other notable jokes:
-Metroid "non canon as @#$%" Other M.
-Duke Nukem Forever
-Xboned
-CoD Ghost's Dog showcasing
-3DO, Virtual Boy, Sega 32x ect. ect,
-EA, Square Enix, and Capcom
-Indie games more or less.
-DLC
-AAA game industry mindset in general
So judging by the end of your post you think pretty much the whole video game industry is a joke right now?
 

debtcollector

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Nobody's said Sonic yet? Huh. It's bizarre that a franchise that has exhausted nigh all goodwill will still make a new game every few years. Seriously, the first thing anyone says when a new Sonic game is announced is that it will be terrible, and people who argue with them are becoming fewer and fewer because the evidence is stacking up. It's one of the few franchises I think should be put down, just out of mercy.

Also, "spunkgargleweewee." No, not the concept or the word. More the idea that any military fps can be summarily dismissed by a childish word culled from a Yahtzee review. The kind of people who use this word are people whose opinions hurt the gaming community.
 

Racecarlock

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Chicago Ted said:
Racecarlock said:
I did play it, though, and I hated it. I care not for realism as long as I get to do cool things that I can't do in other games. For example Saints Row The Third has the awesome tron level that lets me be a dragon at the end. GTA V has that entire minor turbulence mission.

Mafia II has generic cover shooting, chores, and maybe one mission where you blow up a building. You know, because they weren't aware that red faction guerilla will let you destroy almost everything.
So, by this logic, Goodfellas is a worthless film because it wasn't Transformers.

You are aware that not every game needs to be catered to the extreme ADD crowd right? You know, the ones that can't go forty seconds without something being either shot or blown up without completely losing interest in the game.

Look, you didn't like it, fine, understandable, not for everyone, but painting it as shite just because it wasn't stuffing constant action down your throat is just drivel. Not every game needs to be built up on having the screen constantly filled with the bloom and explosions. Mafia II was slower, yeah, but being slower doesn't automatically mean being worse.
I'm not trying to say that it was shit for everyone else. If you like it, fine, but for me it was one of the worst games I have ever played.

I haven't seen goodfellas, but I assume that film would actually do something to keep me interested, but mafia II's story just reminded me of the stories of GTA III and IV, as if they collided and farted out a generic mafia game.

Also, extreme ADD? Really? I know you don't agree with my opinion which I am still not trying to force on everyone else, but there's no need for insults.
 

Olas

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Dec 24, 2011
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The Sonic series

Origin

Pre-ordering

Season Passes

People arguing 720p looks better than 1080p

People who got butthurt over Greg Tito's review of GTAV
 

DrunkOnEstus

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May 11, 2012
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Just because it's bothering me right now: Deadly Premonition. Yes, I know it's in on it's own joke, but:

Got it on 360 for $10 more than it was worth because it was supposed to be cult and they printed like 10 copies. Fair enough. Difficulty was totally fucked and combat had no real purpose.

Oh, there's a director's cut for the PS3? 40 bucks? God dammit, well if I can enjoy the amazing story and open-ended mystery solving with refined combat, better framerate, and less bugs, then I'm game. Oh, the framerate is worse. And you removed all the difficulty options and made the combat even more pointless by having everything go down in one shot. And there's more bugs than there were before? Fuuuckk...

Okay, so there's a PC port. Awesome. I mean, it's the PC, I can make it look as beautiful as I want it to be, decide to use KB&M or the gamepad, and I should be able to brute-force it into running at 60 fps regardless. And it's priced more towards the original release, even though I blew 40 bucks on that broken shit for the PS3. Oh...there's no native gamepad support. Or any audio/visual options whatsoever of any kind, not even resolution. And I have to put it in Windows 98 compatibility mode to stop it from crashing, which makes the loading times longer than on either console.

Which makes me the biggest joke, for spending $95 on a $20 budget game that I haven't beaten yet because I'm waiting for a modder to do in two weeks what Access has been trying to do for like 10 years. But of what I've experienced, I do love. Else I wouldn't be still trying.
 

Thaluikhain

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IrateDonnie said:
thaluikhain said:
Duke Nukem Forever...it's sorta a shame they killed the joke by making the game people had been mocking for years.
It's ok HL3/episode 3??? took it's spot
Well...HL3 is something that people want to see happen, and that nobody is actually working on (I think).

DNF was always going to be crap, and people were always working on it.
 

Chicago Ted

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Racecarlock said:
I'm not trying to say that it was shit for everyone else. If you like it, fine, but for me it was one of the worst games I have ever played.

I haven't seen goodfellas, but I assume that film would actually do something to keep me interested, but mafia II's story just reminded me of the stories of GTA III and IV, as if they collided and farted out a generic mafia game.

Also, extreme ADD? Really? I know you don't agree with my opinion which I am still not trying to force on everyone else, but there's no need for insults.
I can get behind those criticisms more. I do agree, it's no masterpiece of storytelling, and it could have been improved in a number of ways, just that the angle of going at it because it was filled with a few activities that slowed down gameplay a bit, but improved narrative and story focus felt like it was missing the point. For example that crate moving bit you were talking about, the entire point of it was to show even the main character's frustration with the monotony of how things would be if he continued down that path. And as I recall, you had the option as well to just walk away from it as well. The purpose for things like that are a bit more world building that a lot of games I feel just skip out completely these days. I mean, stories and such can't constantly be rising action until the finale and then just end, it has to have some room to breathe as well.

And yeah, sorry, went a bit over the line with the ADD remark, but that's my own personal frustration that came out a bit there. Seriously, going back on that and reading it again, I do think that was over the line, so again, sorry 'bout that. It's just I find both Saints Row and Red Faction to be some of the bottom of the barrel sandboxes that, especially with Saints Row's case, are held up way too high. Both are a bit of fun once in a while, but get very boring very quickly because there's no real sense of achievement or challenge present in each which are major crippling flaws. It's all cheap thrill. Sure you can go knock down a building, or go around with unlimited ammo and invulnerability to near everything and cause some chaos but both have the same amount of substance as piling a bunch of bodies together on some explosive barrels on GMod and then watching them go flying. There isn't much satisfaction to be had when everything is spoon fed to the player. And this is coming from someone who played the original Saints Row after launch and loved it. The demand by people to make that game just more and more over the top absolutely ruined it in my mind.

Anyways, I'll cut off my rambling now. Short version, I can agree with those criticisms on story and such more, though find going at its slower pacing originally to be fairly shallow, and am sorry for the ADD comment there, but personally find Saints Row to be one of the worst sandboxes out there.
 

Chicago Ted

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EDIT:

Double Post. Stupid Escapist Captcha went wonky. What ever happened to two scrambled words? These ad based ones are just horrible, they hardly work.
 

JagermanXcell

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KazeAizen said:
So judging by the end of your post you think pretty much the whole video game industry is a joke right now?
Um yeah... pretty much. I can take Platinum, From Software, and Atlus (I'm probably forgetting other worthy non-f*** ups) pretty seriously nowadays. Those devs have no time for such petty jokes.
But other then that the gaming community and industry is one big joke atm.
Not sure if I should be smiling or crying in the corner about it though.
 

jdavies655

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Farming simulator.
Seriously who plays a game to farm?
i have a friend who is a farmer who has rocked up over 200 hours on it and its pretty much all he does when he's not farming
 

StriderShinryu

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Gamers who whine about how the only games out there that are being made are either first person shooters or third person shooters, but seem to base their game buying on what has the most shelf space at GameStop. Gaming is, essentially, in a new golden age right now for diversity and quality. Steam alone has greenlit over 300 games in the last few months, and indies are even big news on the consoles these days. It's not the fault of anyone but yourself if you can't find something cool to play. Expand your horizons a little, support what you like and don't support what you don't like (and don't blame anyone else for liking something that you don't).

And, as an honorable mention, Nintendo. No, not Nintendo the gaming company that provides solid (yet I would say largely unsurprising) content on a semi regular basis. I mean Nintendo the company that still runs itself and views the gaming world at large as if they were still a playing card company in the 1800s. They do seem to be getting better but it still seems to only be a couple months at most before there's another "Oh, you Nintendo" face palm moment.
 

KazeAizen

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Xcell935 said:
KazeAizen said:
So judging by the end of your post you think pretty much the whole video game industry is a joke right now?
Um yeah... pretty much. I can take Platinum, From Software, and Atlus (I'm probably forgetting other worthy non-f*** ups) pretty seriously nowadays. Those devs have no time for such petty jokes.
But other then that the gaming community and industry is one big joke atm.
Not sure if I should be smiling or crying in the corner about it though.
Wow even I wouldn't go that far. You have a very bleak outlook on things then.
 

KazeAizen

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thaluikhain said:
IrateDonnie said:
thaluikhain said:
Duke Nukem Forever...it's sorta a shame they killed the joke by making the game people had been mocking for years.
It's ok HL3/episode 3??? took it's spot
Well...HL3 is something that people want to see happen, and that nobody is actually working on (I think).

DNF was always going to be crap, and people were always working on it.
Kingdom Hearts 3 almost joined Half Life 3 in that realm. What was worse though was other KH were actually being made. Then something happened and apparently Square Enix decided its going to get its shit together and start pushing out stuff we've been wanting/waiting on.
 

Drake the Dragonheart

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Yopaz said:
I'm going for an old one here and say Nintendo and their console names for the last decade.

They announced they were working on a new console with the project name Revolution, I was psyched, being a massive Nintendo fan (I still am, but not as zealous) and then they announced the Wii... the jokes were endless and it took quite some time before you could say you were going to play with your Wii before no-one would chuckle at what it sounds like. I still wanted the console, but I've had so much fun with the name.

Then Nintendo was moving away from the Wii and then they announced... the Wii U which was even more hilarious, the sound of an ambulance? I love my Wii U, but I still mock the name. It was also really stupid in terms of marketing since its name has caused some confusion that it's just a peripheral to the Wii.

Nintendo, I love you guys, but stop feeding us easy jokes, you're giving Xbox One a run for its money.
I agree with this one. The xbox one's shortened name, xbone. Really?

BunnyKillBot said:
Surely the answer is The Sims.
I have to say I understand the logic behind that one. Let's turn real life into a game.
 

JagermanXcell

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KazeAizen said:
Xcell935 said:
KazeAizen said:
So judging by the end of your post you think pretty much the whole video game industry is a joke right now?
Um yeah... pretty much. I can take Platinum, From Software, and Atlus (I'm probably forgetting other worthy non-f*** ups) pretty seriously nowadays. Those devs have no time for such petty jokes.
But other then that the gaming community and industry is one big joke atm.
Not sure if I should be smiling or crying in the corner about it though.
Wow even I wouldn't go that far. You have a very bleak outlook on things then.
I wouldn't say bleak, I'm still enthusiastic about upcoming titles. Titles that aren't obvious generic shrivel, something I can enjoy without thinking about the garbage the industry/community pull. Sometimes ignorance is bliss when it comes to this hobby. I'm not trying to be a debbie downer I was just joking, I'm just disappointed in all the negative and would rather focus on whats positive is all.
"The positive" being something this thread clearly isn't focused on. :p
 

KazeAizen

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Xcell935 said:
KazeAizen said:
Xcell935 said:
KazeAizen said:
So judging by the end of your post you think pretty much the whole video game industry is a joke right now?
Um yeah... pretty much. I can take Platinum, From Software, and Atlus (I'm probably forgetting other worthy non-f*** ups) pretty seriously nowadays. Those devs have no time for such petty jokes.
But other then that the gaming community and industry is one big joke atm.
Not sure if I should be smiling or crying in the corner about it though.
Wow even I wouldn't go that far. You have a very bleak outlook on things then.
I wouldn't say bleak, I'm still enthusiastic about upcoming titles. Titles that aren't obvious generic shrivel, something I can enjoy without thinking about the garbage the industry/community pull. Sometimes ignorance is bliss when it comes to this hobby. I'm not trying to be a debbie downer I was just joking, I'm just disappointed in all the negative and would rather focus on whats positive is all.
"The positive" being something this thread clearly isn't focused on. :p
Eh. Its my own fault. I had a weird mindset when I made this. I was mostly thinking in terms of things that are almost considered universal jokes. Like IGN, EA Sports, The Spike VGAs. Clearly I mis worded it and just had a bunch of negativity brought in instead of something we could all laugh at. Consider this thread dead.
 

JagermanXcell

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KazeAizen said:
Xcell935 said:
KazeAizen said:
Xcell935 said:
KazeAizen said:
So judging by the end of your post you think pretty much the whole video game industry is a joke right now?
Um yeah... pretty much. I can take Platinum, From Software, and Atlus (I'm probably forgetting other worthy non-f*** ups) pretty seriously nowadays. Those devs have no time for such petty jokes.
But other then that the gaming community and industry is one big joke atm.
Not sure if I should be smiling or crying in the corner about it though.
Wow even I wouldn't go that far. You have a very bleak outlook on things then.
I wouldn't say bleak, I'm still enthusiastic about upcoming titles. Titles that aren't obvious generic shrivel, something I can enjoy without thinking about the garbage the industry/community pull. Sometimes ignorance is bliss when it comes to this hobby. I'm not trying to be a debbie downer I was just joking, I'm just disappointed in all the negative and would rather focus on whats positive is all.
"The positive" being something this thread clearly isn't focused on. :p
Eh. Its my own fault. I had a weird mindset when I made this. I was mostly thinking in terms of things that are almost considered universal jokes. Like IGN, EA Sports, The Spike VGAs. Clearly I mis worded it and just had a bunch of negativity brought in instead of something we could all laugh at. Consider this thread dead.
A dead thread?! Not on my watch!!!!!!! Relevant video, activate!

 

saxman234

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Nov 23, 2011
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Yopaz said:
I'm going for an old one here and say Nintendo and their console names for the last decade.

They announced they were working on a new console with the project name Revolution, I was psyched, being a massive Nintendo fan (I still am, but not as zealous) and then they announced the Wii... the jokes were endless and it took quite some time before you could say you were going to play with your Wii before no-one would chuckle at what it sounds like. I still wanted the console, but I've had so much fun with the name.

Then Nintendo was moving away from the Wii and then they announced... the Wii U which was even more hilarious, the sound of an ambulance? I love my Wii U, but I still mock the name. It was also really stupid in terms of marketing since its name has caused some confusion that it's just a peripheral to the Wii.

Nintendo, I love you guys, but stop feeding us easy jokes, you're giving Xbox One a run for its money.
Your forgetting the Nintendo 2ds that came out after the Nintendo 3ds, which came out after the Nintendo DS! This is one hell of a way to confuse parents when they are Christmas shopping for their kids!

Some other personal jokes:
- Preordering anything, especially DLC.
- Personally I think yearly sequels are a joke (madden, any sports game, cod, battlefield/moh, Acreed, new super mario, etc), why do people want to play similar games every year.
- The fact that these companies can't make a profit even when they sell 6 million copies
- Fanboys and how defensive/angry everyone gets on forums (this applies to all fanboys)
- That fact that after a couple months every Perfect/Near Perfect/Ground Breaking/Amazing/10 rated pretty much across the board, game starts to get despised. It is amazing how everyone is so defensive of a games quality and will say it is the best game ever and fight the 2 reviews to the death that dare give it a 7 only for a few months to pass and everyone realizes that the game wasn't as great as everyone first thought (GTA4 definitely springs to mind, but a ton of games have this happen, Bioshock Infinite, Skyward Sword (a game I have always personally thought was mediocre), etc).
- People that will fight reviews to death and tell the reviewer they are wrong for having an opinion and bringing up reviews from 3 years ago.