The Escapist Avatar Adventure: An Open RP (Now Re-Opened!)

Recommended Videos

Zepren

The Funnyman
Sep 2, 2009
1,385
0
0
"I'm a chicken mage, what can I say?" Said Glenrath as he landed on the falling wreckage of the hero's spaceship, blunderbusses in hand. Sam landed infront of him and Secondus landed not far away.

Glenrath pointed a blunderbuss at each of them.

"Let's dance, Bitches!" Clucked Glenrath.
 

Sam G

New member
Jul 14, 2009
2,580
0
0
"Wait, so we're dead? What? Where are you going with this, Emmy?" Sam asked, speaking in the mind of Spanky's poster somehow using magic or something, I don't even care.
 

SpaceSpork

New member
May 15, 2009
2,409
0
0
Sidoh and Secondus then undied. Sidoh flew back up to heaven, and Sam grabbed Slouch's corpse and backflipped up to the heavens.
A few seconds later, Secondus looked down to at Spanky, and said, in his best Cartman voice, "Screw this plot twist, I'ma going home."
 

Sam G

New member
Jul 14, 2009
2,580
0
0
"Oh, and now you're suspended. Perfect. That's just incredible timing, is that. Kill us all, then lose the ability to do anything about it." Sam sighed.
"Hey, I'm sorry..." Emmy replied, appearing in purgatory next to Sam because that'd be really convenient.
"Nah, don't worry about it... So, Six Billion Dollar Man arc, eh? Sounds interesting... I mean, I'd love to introduce that for you, but I don't think It'd be the same without your perverted sex jokes, video game references and Ben Croshaw fanboyism, so..."
"Yeah, don't worry about it..." Emmy turned to Sam abruptly. "Hang on, I'm not a Yahtzee fanboy-"
"You find Nathan Drake annoying (just like Yahtzee), JRPGs bore you (just like Yahtzee), you once told Adam to put a pencil between the joints of his middle and fourth finger-"
"Alright, fine, maybe I'm kind of a Yahtzee fanboy-" Sam raised a hand to silence him.
"-You think a webcomic's incomplete unless it features at least one Yahtzee reference-"
"Alright, enough-"
"-You use swear-words in leu of punctuation-"
"ENOUGH, DAMMIT!!!" Emmy picked Sam up with both hands, raised him above his head and threw him down a hill which I totally mentioned that they were standing on.
"Alright, now that I've got that off my chest, let's come up with a new plot." Sam stood up and climbed back up the hill.

A few hours later, Sam and Emmy were lying on the perfectly white grass, staring up at the perfectly white sky and bouncing ideas off one another.
"Okay, so what if the marines from Aliens versus Predator crashed a spaceship into the roof of Purgatory and we escaped through the hole?" Emmy tried.
"Nah, too unoriginal. How about if Death the Kid turned up and sacrificed his mortality to allow us to escape?" Sam asked.
"Nah, too dramatic. What if Yatzee-"
"No. What if..." Sam faltered. He had actually run out of ideas. "What if we just wait for a few more days until you get un-banned, and then we'll see what we can come up with?"
"Yeah, that's a good idea..."
 

Zepren

The Funnyman
Sep 2, 2009
1,385
0
0
"Damn you poster! We are behind now!" Said glenrath raising an agry fist to the sky. He replaced the blunderbusses onto his back.
"At least we're neutral now, the most over-powered characters are with us." Said Glenrath
"Are we really neutral? Does it not sound abit gay to you?" Asked Zepren.
"No, it's awesome. That pig freaks me out big time." Said Glenrath cautiously.
"Agreed. Ok we'll stick to this for now. But don't even think of joining the....." Zepren was interrupted by Glenrath.
"Hey maddawg! Room for one more?" Yelled Glen to the villains.

Zepren facepalmed.
 

SpaceSpork

New member
May 15, 2009
2,409
0
0
"Well, here's Slouch." Said Secondus, handing Slouch to Sidoh. "Excellent." Said Sidoh, putting Slouch in a cage of some sort. "Now, go get Glenrath for me."
 

Zepren

The Funnyman
Sep 2, 2009
1,385
0
0
"Not you again, woman" Said Glenrath. "Fuck off!"
The chicken had newly awoken badassry in himself. He leant against a newly erected barn, smoking a cigarette.
 

Zepren

The Funnyman
Sep 2, 2009
1,385
0
0
SpaceSpork said:
Secondus slashed at Glen's ballsack, cutting it open. Drippy ball ooze then began pouring out.
Was that really necessary
"Whatever." Glenrath levitated the barn and dropped it on secondus. He then flicked his cigarette onto it. Secondus burned and burned.
"That how I like my freaks, extra crispy" Said Glen, walking away, leaving the dude to burn
 

Sam G

New member
Jul 14, 2009
2,580
0
0
"Oh, would you look at that, I'm burning to death," Sam commented.
"Ah. Someone must have set Secondus on fire," Emmy replied.
"Prob'ly Glenrath, the pyromaniac bastard," Sam said, casually watching as his shirt fell apart in ashes. "Not even gonna bother making a gay joke here, it's too obvious. Anyway, exposition time:" Sam stood to his feet, pulled a fresh Atari shirt out of his Subspace Bag and pulled it on. "I-" A blackboard appeared behind him with a chalk stickman on it. "-Am in purgatory. That means my body can't be harmed physically. Therefore-" Sam drew a second stickman on the board, this one kitted out in a Sith outfit complete with flowing black cloak. "-Secondus can't be harmed either; so the flames won't be affecting him too badly.

"What the hell was that?" Secondus asked. "You little *****! You think you're the only one who can god-mode? I can god-mode in a way that actually makes sense, and has a good reason behind it! Screw you, asshole!" He drew his lightsaber and activated it, the blade growing in width and length due to his rage and causing it to spark dangerously. "I have had a-goddamn-nough! BANKAI!!!" The lightsaber blade unleashed an immense light, causing Sidoh and Glenrath to look away. When they were capable of looking again, Secondus' lightsaber had reformed itself so that the blade now looked like
[http://img148.imageshack.us/i/waffe59qp.jpg/]
, only lightsaber-ish.
"And now you'll taste my true power," Secondus declared, lowering the blade and dashing towards Glenrath. "HA!" He stopped a few feet short of the mage-chicken and swung the blade, causing a ripple in the air that cut towards his foe.
 

Zepren

The Funnyman
Sep 2, 2009
1,385
0
0
Glenrath disappeared. He reappeared on Secondus' head. Secondus swung again, Glenrath disappeared again.
Glen yawned.
"Come on, i'm a chicken mage not a pinata." He sighed "I want sam back"
Glenrath drew one of his blunderbusses and blew a hole in Secondus' chest.
"Plus Sidoh seems to be the only person enjoying you around" He said as he put his hand inside Secondus' chest and pulled a disgruntled ashy Sam out. As Sam appeared, Secondus disappeared. The second Sam's feet came all the way through, Secondus had fully disappeared.
"Welcome back. Meh, I'm thinking I should go back to being a hero. With you and phil here, I can bear the pig.... for now." Grinned the mage.

"What about him?" Asked Sam, pointing at Sidoh.
"Will he shine my shoes?" Asked Glenrath
"You don't have shoes"
"Point"
 

Sam G

New member
Jul 14, 2009
2,580
0
0
"The plot! The plot is back!" Emmy declared, bursting out of the hole in Secondus's chest, despite the fact that Secondus had now disappeared inside Sam (thank god this isn't any form of visual media, or I'd have no way of explaining it).
"Yep!" Sam smiled.
"Well then I need you to kill me!" Emmy declared.
"What? Why?" Sam looked puzzled.
"Because author avatars are boring and overused, and I don't want to return from my suspension and suddenly find myself in control of one!"
"Oh, alright then." Sam picked up Secondus's bankai-saber off the ground and sliced Emmy neatly in half with it.
"Thanks man!" Emmy exclaimed, before dissolving into red bubbles and dissapearing into the atmosphere like enemies in the censored European version of No More Heroes do.
"Alright then, gang, we have ourselves a mission," Sam said, turning to Sidoh and Glenrath. "No, wait, hang on a minute." He turned around, walked back to the hill where he and Emmy had sat discussing plot ideas, and planted the bankai-saber in the ground on top of it as a marker. "You're a cool guy, Emmy. Don't go getting yourself banned again." He turned around and walked back to the other two. "As I was saying, we need to find the souls of the other heroes and villains who died in that explosion and bring them back."
"Will there be adventure?" Sidoh inquired.
"Adventure coming out the wazoo, my friend." Sam spun around, the back of his jacket flowing in the wind, and walked off in slow-motion, with Sidoh and Glenrath hovering behind him.
 

SpaceSpork

New member
May 15, 2009
2,409
0
0
Sidoh disappeared in a black puff of smoke, and was replaced by Secondus. "Wait a second." Said Secondus, in Sidoh's voice. "I'm Sam's soul. Anti-Sam is your mind. And you are Anti-Sam. Every creature has a soul, which means I am Anti-anti-Sam. I am also, as stated by the recent plot point announced by Cole, Sidoh. Which means . . ." Secondus turned back into Sidoh. "I am Sam!"
"Ah, shit," Said Sam, "Now I'm you. That's just great."