The "Family Values" trope.

[Parasondox]

Hi. I'm Para. Not that Para. The other one. I shall be your public speaker today and I will assure you that I will not send a dick pic this hour. Actually dick pics are sooooo 2014 ago. The new craze is belly buttons. Inny and outty. So send them if you please *

*Please don't send me pics of your belly buttons.

Family is important. Family is what molds us and supports us like a training bra. It's what humanity and the rest of the animal kingdom hold onto in life.

*Vin Diesel voice* It's about family.

Families come in different shapes and sizes. They could be the alleged normal structure of, man, woman, kids, pet, roaches, or they are those we look up too, trust, care for, the ones that aren't blood relatives but damn well sure that you will back them through thick and thin.

So, why the fuck in the Western world if someone does something a bit taboo, a threesome, swinging, being gay, giving a homeless person money, it breaks "family values" and the sort.

Ted Cruz (if I say his name three times in the mirror at night, I will be visited by Satan telling me that he is offended when he is compared to either Trump or Cruz. Poor Satan, he has had a bad rep for over 2000 even years.) and other politicians and powerful figures keep banging on about must hold these values when opposing the what they seem as, no right. When gay marriage was annsidedd to be legal in the US, Fox News loses their fucking minds and saying how this will end marriage. *****, please!! Marriage was flawed since its conception.

Anywho, back to family. How important is it to you?

Do you get annoyed when someone tries to bring up family values that is seems one sided because a single parent or two moms or two dad's or multiple partners in a family isnt seen as a "family" thing.

Yeah, it's things I have seen and heard in recent years that has me thinking about it.

 

[mduncan50]

"Family Values" is referring to a Leave it to Beaver style ideology that never actually existed. "Family Values" is a smokescreen social conservatives use to label any progressive movements as harmful to children or, well, to anyone. We all have families! If anyone tries to convince you to vote, act, or think a certain way in the name of "Family Values" they are fearful little beings that think they are in danger of losing much more than they've ever actually had.

 

[Bob_McMillan]

What exactly are American family values? I'm fairly certain my country have much different values, ones that actually seem to have something to do with family.

 

[Parasondox]

What exactly are American family values? I'm fairly certain my country have much different values, ones that actually seem to have something to do with family.

Something along the lines of mom, dad, kids, grandparents living nearby, something like that. Well it's dated and old. It's why you won't see a single man become president of the United States. Unless the early ones were but that hasn't been brought. Also PR companies for the political parties push that to an extreme. "Having a family makes you look like the everyday kind of person. Shows you have structure and control", blah blah. An everyday person is different and most kids these days live in a single parent household so f to that.

 

[Thaluikhain]

Eh, you can't outright say "I'm a bigot" and be taken too seriously, so you have to say "family values" or "tradition" or somesuch. Likewise, the term "values voter". Or, hell, a nation with "People's Democratic" in the title.

It is rather annoying that only certain values are allowed to be called values, yes.

 

[Addendum_Forthcoming]

"Family Values" is referring to a Leave it to Beaver style ideology that never actually existed. "Family Values" is a smokescreen social conservatives use to label any progressive movements as harmful to children or, well, to anyone. We all have families! If anyone tries to convince you to vote, act, or think a certain way in the name of "Family Values" they are fearful little beings that think they are in danger of losing much more than they've ever actually had.

Irony being that "family values" tends to destroy families they seek to protect. I was made homeless when I was 16. Anathema to at least 60% of family members I have ... which is fortunate because I save a ton on phonebills and presents come December and feel no guilt over it. Family values, while painting themselves as if the moral guardian, acts more like an assassin of morals.

 

[Cowabungaa]

How important are 'family values' to me?

Not in the slightest.

My immediate family is a relatively loose collective anyway. We always sort of just did our own things. More like a solar system as in we orbit loosely around each other and sometimes do shared activities. I personally even moved to a different country, from The Netherlands to Belgium, and mainly keep in contact with my immediate family and grandparents through WhatsApp. And even if the actual distance isn't that great, around 3 hours by train or almost 2 hours by car, I only see them about twice a year. During Christmas and either some time in spring or early summer. I simply have my own things to do and they're happy that I do. It's not that I dislike them, mind you. We had a rough period, definitely, but it worked out eventually. But these days my life takes up too much time to see them often and we're all cool with that.

As for 'traditional family values' in the US socio-political sense? Come on, we're Dutch. That should tell you enough. Like, my dad is currently growing some pot for shits and giggles. We might actually have spacecake for Christmas this year. That's how much I care.

 

[Pseudonym]

Family values

Eh, you can't outright say "I'm a bigot" and be taken too seriously, so you have to say "family values" or "tradition" or somesuch. Likewise, the term "values voter". Or, hell, a nation with "People's Democratic" in the title.

It is rather annoying that only certain values are allowed to be called values, yes.

This pretty much sums up the problem. Holding 'family values' doesn't mean you care about your family or families in general. It means you are a bigot. Ussually when 'family values' get brought up I expect somebody to be arguing against gay marriage or some such thing.

 

[Casual Shinji]

Well, what exactly are we discussing here -- the importance of family, or the importance of what particular role members hold within that family?

Seeing as my family is the only contact I have with others, they're pretty damn important to me. As for the traditional family that conservatives are afraid will get wrecked by gay marriage... I doubt gay people hold that much power. Whether or not this is a controversial statement I do believe it's best for a child to grow up with both a male and female perspective. Not that I believe children raised by gay couples or single parents will grow up screwey or anything, just that it can maybe prepare them a bit better to deal with men and women later in life. But then I was raised by a mom and dad and I can't deal with anything, so what do I know.

 

[Addendum_Forthcoming]

Well, what exactly are we discussing here -- the importance of family, or the importance of what particular role members hold within that family?

Seeing as my family is the only contact I have with others, they're pretty damn important to me. As for the traditional family that conservatives are afraid will get wrecked by gay marriage... I doubt gay people hold that much power. Whether or not this is a controversial statement I do believe it's best for a child to grow up with both a male and female perspective. Not that I believe children raised by gay couples or single parents will grow up screwey or anything, just that it can maybe prepare them a bit better to deal with men and women later in life. But then I was raised by a mom and dad and I can't deal with anything, so what do I know.

I don't know ... I was angry for while for not having any parents, homeless shelters are awful ... mainly due to the people who run them here. Then I wasn't angry. I kind of think parents mess us up way more than they provide a stable basis. I also get the feeling that as working periods grow longer, more stressful, and for less real wealth in most of the West .... that families are simply going to mess eachother up even more. Guaranteed if you spend any time with even a moderately liberal, respectful, expressive family background ... if you happen to be LGBT there's a part of you that's frightened about coming out, frightened about rejection, feeling guilty for no good reason.

We spend all this time, equivocating what family means when all every 15 year old needs is a guarantee of a job that pays the rent. It worked for those that seem to speak the most highly of 'family values' and the 'good old times'. Oddly enough it's also the thing that those who speak of 'family values' seem to fight hardest against. You know, liveable wages, etc. Hell, they even bumped up the age of enlistment here for military service, and that was one of the things that helped pull me out of the gutter... so Lord knows what they want youth to do if not simply tie themselves to increasingly dysfunctional "family" units.

They pay 16 years old here 10.50 an hour ... who the fuck can survive on that? You'd need to work 80 hour weeks just to pay the rent after tax. Ridiculous. I've met plenty of young adult workers, driven and wearied ... but spirited nonetheless, that I would still consider a wise investment to pay 22 an hour. Sorry state of affairs that we abuse such labour. Treat children like criminals who can't do anything without dear mum by their side, and you get broken adults. "Family" is a poison like that.

 

[Vanilla ISIS]

Given that this is mainly video game forum, I think we can all agree that "family values" are a cancer when it comes to the medium.

It seems to me that "family values" are a talking point, mainly used by people who consider themselves to be right wing.
The point of using it is almost always to silence the opposition and make them look bad, without actually refuting any of their arguments.
The equivalent of that on the left would be social justice ("think of the women/minorities" instead of "think of the children").

When it comes to my family, I love my mom but the rest could die in a fire and I would probably not care all that much.
I also don't plan on ever starting a family unit of my own.

 

[MysticSlayer]

What exactly are American family values? I'm fairly certain my country have much different values, ones that actually seem to have something to do with family.

Some things that tend to get lumped in with "family values":

-Opposition to homosexuality. This extends to opposing homosexual couples from adopting, because they believe having two moms or two dads is damaging to the child.
-Belief that the "perfect family" (not a real term) is one mom, one dad, a couple kids, and all living close enough to grandparents to visit and include the extended family. They probably will find the support offered by family eroding otherwise.
-Pro-life stance on abortion. This may or may not extend to also opposing birth control.
-Religion, particularly some variant of Christianity, is probably involved.
-When it comes to entertainment, things like violence, language, and drug use should be kept to a minimum, if shown at all. Sex is completely uncalled for unless it is a subtle reference no child would understand. It's all "think of the children" here.

Those are just a handful of ideas. You can probably figure out some of their other ideas based on those alone.

 

[K12]

"Family values" is just branding. I'm not a retrogressive bigoted right winger I just have "Family Values". No we're not firing people we're "Downsizing". We're not going to war we're just doing a "Humanitarian Intervention".

"Traditional Family values" is at least honest because everyone is aware that "tradition" is a code for bigotry when used in a political context (except sometimes when you're talking about art, entertainment and architecture etc.)

 

[MCerberus]

Wikipedia article about this:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dog-whistle_politics

Essentially it's code for rolling back LGBT, artist, and women's rights. Like a lot of things it's "bring back the 50s" regressive

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"Family Values" is referring to a Leave it to Beaver style ideology that never actually existed.

I like to call those pseudo-traditionalists "Cleaverists" because they seem to have a fantasy of a world where Ward Cleaver sat in his chair with his pipe and newspaper and told the world what to do, and by golly it did what he said, because he was the man of the house.

It's a simplistic, traditionalist view held by people who simply can't handle change.

 

[Guffe]

I like my family, mom, dad and little brother.
Hopefully I'll be the dad someday and have a child or two of my own.
When/if that happens, mom and dad will become grandparents and the family will not be mom, dad and little brother anymore?
I'm thinking too much again, what I wanted to say was, I like my family!

 

[Parasondox]

What exactly are American family values? I'm fairly certain my country have much different values, ones that actually seem to have something to do with family.

Nice house, white picket fence. Male Husband, Female wife, 2 kids.

Husband works all day and then comes home to drink, and doesn't get involved in raising children

Wife cooks, cleans, raises kids, and generally runs the house around the husband since she stays home all day

Son plays football and kisses all the girls, only maturing into an adult after marriage once he has a wife to take care of him

Daughter must mature into a grown woman after her first period, spends her youth learning how to be a good wife and how to find a good man to raise and take care of so they can have a nice house with a white picket fence with 2 kids

I know people still think and live like that but reading through it out loud sounded and felt really uncomfortable and wrong. Some may say, "well nothing is wrong with that. I don't see the big deal", but if you look deeply into it, it sounds so brainwashie.

Men, you must be like this. Women you must be like this. Do that and this shall be your perfection. It's your only purpose in life. So culty.

 

[Zontar]

I'm thinking too much again, what I wanted to say was, I like my family!

Given what some people have to say on the matter, in the eyes of some that may make you a bigot for some inexplicable reason. But then again that tends to come from people who have a massive double standard of claiming that it's wrong to imply everyone on the left is a Stalinist or Maoist who will kill everyone who is too smart or produces too much, while unirronically calling everyone on the right an inherent bigot due to their inability to realize that most people aren't closet bigots despite what they may think.

OT: My thoughts on family values is a complicated one.

On the one hand they've been used to justify attacking virtually every medium by both the right and the left (something people tend to forget is that while the right tends to hate sex in entertainment, it's predominantly the left trying to take violence out of it).

On the other hand family values within the context of the home life has an objective measurable quality to it in that those who have them tend to end up with more stable income, better quality of life, better levels of education, lower crime rates, lower social dysfunction and are one of the least likely groups to enter poverty.

I guess it's one of those "micro vs macro level" things for me. While I don't support it on the macro level of society, on the micro level I'd say it's something to be aspired to given the long term effects not following them have had on society as a whole.

Ghetto culture could sure use some family values instead of gangster worship. And the media ending its celebration of single motherhood wouldn't be a step in the wrong direction either given the negative effects that has on children.

I do love one thing about all this though, people always bring up 'Leave it to Beaver', as though people watched that show because we thought it reflected life at some point in the past. I guess these same people thought the 70s where just like 'That 70s Show' when they watched that and laughed at it and where entertained by it. It's not that some people can just be entertained by something that isn't pushing the left's moralizing onto them.

 

[Fractral]

On the other hand family values within the context of the home life has an objective measurable quality to it in that those who have them tend to end up with more stable income, better quality of life, better levels of education, lower crime rates, lower social dysfunction and are one of the least likely groups to enter poverty.

If by family values you mean a stable, nuclear family with two parents who stay together and look after their kids, then yeah, that's the case. The reason so many people get upset is because a lot of people would add that the parents have to be a heterosexual married couple, which I'm not sure is required for a good upbringing.

Since it's often implied but not often clarified you get one side assuming family values means 'anti-LGBT' while the other side doesn't quite understand what they're upset about because they actually didn't mean to imply that.