So you're the reason I have to tie my women down at night to stop them floating away!Chairman Miaow said:
The most hilarious way you've attempted to attract a mate.
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He was great for things like that, really creative.Shock and Awe said:
On the second date, he took me too my favourite bar a bit before it opened (he knew a guy) and we sat down, had some champagne, music played, it was nice.
Suddenly he jumps up, reaches behind the bar and pulls out two huge pillows, hurls one at me and nails me around the head with his. Eye of the Tiger starts to play. It was on.
The follow scene takes place while AngloDoom is drunk at a party. Future-Girlfriend enters the scene, rather drunk herself, and stands under the warm glow of a lamp.
Anglo: "Wow."
FGF: "What?"
Anglo [swaying slightly]: "You look cute under that light. If you weren't such a good friend, I'd do terrible things to you right now."
FGF [awkwardly]: "...If you keep saying things like that, we're not going to be friends for much longer."
Anglo [with a fucking horribly timed wink]: "Works for me."
The worst part is that it worked and that it was the best relationship I had to this date. I don't want to be an advocate of 'women like arrogant fuckheads' but this one certainly did.
Anglo: "Wow."
FGF: "What?"
Anglo [swaying slightly]: "You look cute under that light. If you weren't such a good friend, I'd do terrible things to you right now."
FGF [awkwardly]: "...If you keep saying things like that, we're not going to be friends for much longer."
Anglo [with a fucking horribly timed wink]: "Works for me."
The worst part is that it worked and that it was the best relationship I had to this date. I don't want to be an advocate of 'women like arrogant fuckheads' but this one certainly did.
Sadly nothing... They always seem to come to me, I'm not trying to brag that's just the way it's always happened with me.
Actually no that's not true, one time back in high school I very loudly and very publicly asked a girl to marry me in a very crowded hallway before class started. It was all a dare someone put me up to, but it got me the girl for a little while & became a running joke for the rest of school. We had been friends for years & she was cool with it & no feelings were ever hurt, it did shock her when I asked though.
Actually no that's not true, one time back in high school I very loudly and very publicly asked a girl to marry me in a very crowded hallway before class started. It was all a dare someone put me up to, but it got me the girl for a little while & became a running joke for the rest of school. We had been friends for years & she was cool with it & no feelings were ever hurt, it did shock her when I asked though.
challenged her for her hand in a duel... with LARP weapons.
dorkiest thing I ever did, aside from the LARP events themselves. XD
dorkiest thing I ever did, aside from the LARP events themselves. XD
Anything from mushy poetry to writing a whole damn novel with one love interest named after her. On the upside, the novel got published and I more or less evened out on the cost.
If I hadn't been caught in a moment of 'oh shit she isn't doing anything, what am I doing?!' That could have saved it for me haha.Thyunda said:
Ooh, very hard to narrow it down to a single attempt. Let's just narrow it down to the age of 18 to age 22. Pretty much anything I did to try and get a woman's attention during that span ended in embarrassment and failure. Though I will say that the most memorable fail during that time wasn't my fault as the girl I was flirting with was reciprocating simply to induce jealousy out of the boyfriend she had conveniently neglected to mention. This encounter ended with the very drunk boyfriend attempting to stab me with a pen to the point of him having to be restrained. Good times -_-.
How the hell did you not marry him?!?Erja_Perttu said:
OT: Usually my methods of flirting tend to end up with me sneaking up and suddenly... SURPRISE POKE ATTACK
Yes, I'm incredibly immature. I know.
I have managed to pull off the 'I'm a tiger handler" play, with a twist.
Totally spur of the moment, I was meeting some friends of a friend and, as happens in general conversation, the cutest one asked me what I do for a living. Now, saying I'm an electrician does have it's perks. Ladies love the tradies. But I was in the mood for a little fun. I've pulled out my phone, shown her a photo of a tiger cub being cradled (which was actually a photo from an entirely different friend) and told her that I had just started as a handler at Tiger Island at Dreamword. (Theme park in Australia) She's proceeded to ask me a heap of questions about it and I've proceeded to make up any bullshit I could think of. When she finally got me with something I could t come up with a convincing answer to, I just told her I had only just started and was still learning. Sea accepted this and asked me how I got into it. At this point I decided to go all in...
I told her that I had been transferred to Dreamworld from Seaworld because their funding had been cut and they could no longer employ me as a dolphin trainer. At this point, my friend at he other end of the table could barely contain herself and was giggling away. Still, I managed to pull it off and so far, no one I met has been able to pretend to be an ex dolphin trainer tiger handler.
Totally spur of the moment, I was meeting some friends of a friend and, as happens in general conversation, the cutest one asked me what I do for a living. Now, saying I'm an electrician does have it's perks. Ladies love the tradies. But I was in the mood for a little fun. I've pulled out my phone, shown her a photo of a tiger cub being cradled (which was actually a photo from an entirely different friend) and told her that I had just started as a handler at Tiger Island at Dreamword. (Theme park in Australia) She's proceeded to ask me a heap of questions about it and I've proceeded to make up any bullshit I could think of. When she finally got me with something I could t come up with a convincing answer to, I just told her I had only just started and was still learning. Sea accepted this and asked me how I got into it. At this point I decided to go all in...
I told her that I had been transferred to Dreamworld from Seaworld because their funding had been cut and they could no longer employ me as a dolphin trainer. At this point, my friend at he other end of the table could barely contain herself and was giggling away. Still, I managed to pull it off and so far, no one I met has been able to pretend to be an ex dolphin trainer tiger handler.
Sad to say, I can't think of any. I usually just go with the whole try to make them laugh/don't be an arsehole method. I did once manage to convince a girl that I was ridiculously deep and/or a genius, but that was mostly an accident. I just happened to be in a particularly introspective mood and came out with more intelligent stuff than usual...
I don't make many advances so I don't make an ass of myself very often but the one that comes to mind was only a month or so ago. I've been raised to make jokes at those I love and take the piss constantly - so if I get married, my wife will need to take it like a champ and dish it out equally to survive. Thus, I usually make jokes at people and see how they take it;
So there's this girl on my course, who I barely know at all but I thought she was cute. We had our last stats lecture for the semester and it barely anyone had shown up for it. As my friends and I are walking in, the lecturer was walking out (going to get something it seemed) and she told us that "nobody is here" pretty loudly, while the door was still open. We walk in to find the cute girl and a couple of her friends sitting there in silence. It seemed our lecturer was emphasizing the mass absence but didn't mean "nobody" literally. So I say what immediately springs to mind; "See that? She doesn't care about you'se. She just called you all 'nobody'". Nothing - they all just look at me blankly.
Ack well - if she can't even pity laugh at that then it would never work out.
So there's this girl on my course, who I barely know at all but I thought she was cute. We had our last stats lecture for the semester and it barely anyone had shown up for it. As my friends and I are walking in, the lecturer was walking out (going to get something it seemed) and she told us that "nobody is here" pretty loudly, while the door was still open. We walk in to find the cute girl and a couple of her friends sitting there in silence. It seemed our lecturer was emphasizing the mass absence but didn't mean "nobody" literally. So I say what immediately springs to mind; "See that? She doesn't care about you'se. She just called you all 'nobody'". Nothing - they all just look at me blankly.
Ack well - if she can't even pity laugh at that then it would never work out.
