The most retarded plot ever.

[LightOfDarkness]

Modern Warfare 1 and 2.

 

[Durxom]

And if so, I'm going to be choosing The Force Unleashed, and only because I'm such an avid Star Wars fan.

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic on the "avid fan" bit, but I always though TFU's plot was really good.

OT: I haven't played the Bionic Commando remake, but I know about what the arm is. Or should I say, WHO the arm is.

How. Fucking. Stupid.

I wasn't being sarcastic =/

TFU's plot was incredibly mediocre in my eyes, and for some reason now, it is offical Star Wars canon.

"Ohh, let's have a complete asspull, and create the strongest force-user to ever live, have him be another one of Vader's apprentices (he has had many, some hidden as well), which negates Vader/Anakin's whole chosen one thing. Also, let's have Starkiller beat up a Jedi Knight on first level, then for some reason go back to him later on, and try and get training from him...You do not need training from someone who you just handed them their ass on a silver platter, (hours) days ago." There's a few other in there as well but I can't think of them atm =/...Also made me a bit pissed how they made random asspull character be one of the sole reasons of the creation of the Rebel Alliance.

 

[GammaZord]

The last/current gen Ninja Gaiden games easily have THE most retarded plots I've ever come across--which is totally fine. I don't really need a logical reason to slice through thousands of demon-ninjas and dragons and shit.

BUT, for something that takes itself seriously (or at least I think it does) I have to say Battlefield Earth. Just awful.

Was that the book/film by L Ron Hubbard? Because I read a plot summary a while ago, and it was pretty awful.

Yup, written by the scientology guru himself

 

[Legion]

There should be a rule on here that you get stuck on probation/suspension if you show hatred/dislike of something like this without giving an explanation for it. It's just plain trolling, pure and simple.

 

[FaithorFire]

How about "Star wars Episode 1" - "Star Wars Episode 2.6"

 

[nick n stuff]

most RPGs.
someone dies, mute protagonist is meant to avenge but instead goes into caves and dungeons for some reason and procrastinates, final battle with a dragon usually, significant character dies.
Ring a bell?

 

[DominicxD]

Well, the game is set in Mexico. One day, while on the bus to work, you notice several anomalies, but try not to think too much about it. The first part of the game sees your character doing what they would normally do. Unofortunately, things go wrong and there is a break in to your workplace. You then

Spoiler

PS3 has no games xDxDxDDDDFDdsajghdfahgi

.

 

[Woodsey]

And if so, I'm going to be choosing The Force Unleashed, and only because I'm such an avid Star Wars fan.

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic on the "avid fan" bit, but I always though TFU's plot was really good.

OT: I haven't played the Bionic Commando remake, but I know about what the arm is. Or should I say, WHO the arm is.

How. Fucking. Stupid.

I wasn't being sarcastic =/

TFU's plot was incredibly mediocre in my eyes, and for some reason now, it is offical Star Wars canon.

"Ohh, let's have a complete asspull, and create the strongest force-user to ever live, have him be another one of Vader's apprentices (he has had many, some hidden as well), which negates Vader/Anakin's whole chosen one thing. Also, let's have Starkiller beat up a Jedi Knight on first level, then for some reason go back to him later on, and try and get training from him...You do not need training from someone who you just handed them their ass on a silver platter, (hours) days ago." There's a few other in there as well but I can't think of them atm =/...Also made me a bit pissed how they made random asspull character be one of the sole reasons of the creation of the Rebel Alliance.

He wasn't the strongest ever was he? He was just really f*cking powerful, that's how I understood it. Besides, Vader couldn't fulfill his potential power after Mustafar; at any rate, the Chosen One thing was that he would destroy the Sith (which he did) it didn't discuss his level of power - at least I don't think it did.

And Marek goes back to Kota after Kota gave him the premonition of his future, and he only decides to do that once he decides to leave Vader after being tricked by him (for the first time). He needed his helps because of his contacts - he had enough followers to attack the TIE factory at the start of the game after all.

As for the Rebel Alliance thing, that always made perfect sense to me and fitted - I thought it was nice how the Emperor pretty much set up what would help to destroy him.

mass effect.

Please be joking.

 

[TheSchizoid]

Mario.

When you actually say it out loud:
"A fat italian plumber is off to go rescue a princess from a gigantic turtle lizard monster and to do so he must battle an army of angry toadstools and eat mushrooms to power himself up, which he gains from jumping on boxes with little question marks on them. Oh and later on down the line he rides a fruit eating dinosaur... and then he goes into space."

The games are fun and while the story isn't really all that important... just hearing it out loud sounds like you are describing an LSD trip.

Is it sad that when I read this I heard it in Yahtzee's voice?

 

[starwarsgeek]

I wasn't being sarcastic =/

TFU's plot was incredibly mediocre in my eyes, and for some reason now, it is offical Star Wars canon.

"Ohh, let's have a complete asspull, and create the strongest force-user to ever live, have him be another one of Vader's apprentices (he has had many, some hidden as well), which negates Vader/Anakin's whole chosen one thing. Also, let's have Starkiller beat up a Jedi Knight on first level, then for some reason go back to him later on, and try and get training from him...You do not need training from someone who you just handed them their ass on a silver platter, (hours) days ago." There's a few other in there as well but I can't think of them atm =/...Also made me a bit pissed how they made random asspull character be one of the sole reasons of the creation of the Rebel Alliance.

Starkiller wasn't the strongest force user to ever live. Hell, I'd say the guy that attacks with you with garbage constructs while he sits at the top of his garbage jedi temple is stronger, force wise.

Also, yeah...the guy who survives a fall from space after being blinded by his own lightsaber [which only worked because he was distracted by the force spoiling the future] probably has some nice tips to pass on.

Besides, the game has one of my personal favorite plot twist moments.

Spoiler

When Vader sums up his entire plot with "...I lied", delivered in a manner that sounds like he was suprised that Starkiller didn't see it coming was hillarious.

 

[Socius]

Twilight.

^thread.

There really ain't anything else to say.
Vapires aren't pixies, and if you think they are, I quote Yatzhee:
You are "pants-on-the-head retarded"

 

[TheFacelessOne]

Halo 3. /thread

No. That is not a /thread. I disagree.

OT: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh I dunno, I guess I'd have to go for Plants vs. Zombies

 

[AcidLillies]

I could actually make sense of the KH/KH 2 stroy line; more so out of of personal involvement and a scarce amount of reflection. I don't entirely think KH is supposed to have a set in stone purpouse or story line, either, it's more figuartive and open for interpretation.

In most cases, I'd have to say COD has some of the worst storylines feesible. Not that I've ever actually managed to play a single one past the initial tutorial, mind you. Ho frigging ho.

 

[poiuppx]

"So like guys, since I haven't used GF's I always remembered y'all from my childhood we all were in the same place in an entirely different deserted continent. But since y'all use GF's you didn't remember. But I did but I decided to not tell you all this, not really sure why."

"OMG NO WAYYY!!!"

"Bullshit.... oh wai- it's all coming back to me now"


"BTW the woman that took care of us.. she's the evil ***** that's been trying to kill us"


"Noooo!!!"

"But wait!"

"There's more?"

"Your boss, that lives in a different continent from the witch, is her HUSBAND, and she created your mercenary school!"

A hundred times this. FF8 turned me off from Squaresoft games for a good while, as it became clear whoever was writing the storylines was enjoying a bit too much home-made alcohol.

 

[Thunderhorse31]

Avatar.

America is bad. The end.


PUT IT IN HER PONYTAIL BRO!

Good line, but I don't recall the bad guys being America, just humanity in general. Then again, if the story has been retold so many times, it's probably not all that stupid.

Twilight.

This. I had someone explain to me the plot of the last book, and it is by far one of the most retarded things I've ever heard.

 

[Korten12]

Halo series:Hey you over there in the space armor go shoot me some aliens would ya.
.

have you read the books? seriosly I am kinda sick of people saying this, when you say Halo Series, you mean everything part of it, not just the games. Play and read the books before saying that.

 

[JeanLuc761]

mass effect.

Nice one (you ARE trolling, yes?)

As for my nomination...the plotline of any Unreal Tournament game. Stop sticking unnecessary stories in there Epic, and just let me get my frag on.

actually, no. though it is a good one. i say its retarded because they never explain where the reapers come from, saying its magic. the citadel is built to be a trap but not every species evolved the same so how does it magically fit us? and why is everyone so stupid that they defile a relic by LIVING in it when they know nothing about it? there are many plot holes in the story making it generic and at times utterly retarded.

I've been operating COMPLETELY under the assumption that Mass Effect 3 will tie all this up.

A couple of those have been answered though.
- The Citadel works for all galaxy species because the Reapers directed evolution to suit their needs, and to ensure life would be compatible with the technology they left behind.
- We live in it because it doesn't pose any threat we're aware of (well, in ME1 anyway), and because it serves well as a galactic hub for all races.

 

[Blueruler182]

Twilight.

This. I had someone explain to me the plot of the last book, and it is by far one of the most retarded things I've ever heard.

Why would you put yourself through that? Someone get this man a medal!

 

[DustyDrB]

mass effect.

Nice one (you ARE trolling, yes?)

As for my nomination...the plotline of any Unreal Tournament game. Stop sticking unnecessary stories in there Epic, and just let me get my frag on.

actually, no. though it is a good one. i say its retarded because they never explain where the reapers come from, saying its magic. the citadel is built to be a trap but not every species evolved the same so how does it magically fit us? and why is everyone so stupid that they defile a relic by LIVING in it when they know nothing about it? there are many plot holes in the story making it generic and at times utterly retarded.

I've wondered this, but you have to remember it is an unfinished trilogy at this point. It's best that they still have some mystery behind them.