The most useless superpower you can think of

[CrimsonBlaze]

The power of perfect hindsight.

You'll know exactly what to do in any given situation.

After it's actually happened.

Wait! You can't possibly mean...


OT: I would have to say the ability to make you forget something permanently. I know that it might work for espionage, but if you forget something that you are being held captive for, you will either be tortured or killed off on the spot.

Quit being a wuss and just bite down already.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

The power to make popcorn pop without a microwave.

Because there are so many situations where it could be useful...

I picture you standing in a giant cornfield, somewhere in the US, your rage flowing freely, suddenly small pops setting of around you, swelling to a veritable cacophony of noise, as you pop every single corncob around you.

Your wrath unleashes a wave of popcorn that shall bury the US under a pile of almost healthy treats.

I...I could destry the US with popcorn?

Screw terrorism, popcorn is the deadliest thing known to the US populace!

Prepare to be buried under a pile of popcorn...that isn't salted...

I like it already.

See, your superpower is far from useless.
And "PREPARE TO FEEL THE WRATH OF TIZZY THE TORMENTOR" has a nice ring to it.
Also, who would ever see a Popcorn-apocalypse coming?

 

[Legion]

The power of perfect hindsight.

You'll know exactly what to do in any given situation.

After it's actually happened.

Godamnit, beaten already. I was actually trying to remember where that's from. My mind tells me it is South Park.

*Looks it up* Hah, I knew it.

 

[ecoho]

I think levitation. You can't move while levitating and it's basically hovering a few feet off of the ground. I'm sure if you were imaginative you could think of some pranks to pull off, or you could go up to someone and say 'Hey, I bet you £10,000 that I can float 6 feet off of the ground', but that's about it.

all you need is a few rockets and bam flight


OT: the power to stop time but in doing so you cant move at all.

 

[BrotherRool]

The power to watch all the cat videos on the internets

The power of perfect hindsight.

You'll know exactly what to do in any given situation.

After it's actually happened.

Someone tries to make a sustainable fusion reactor and fails, you come along and boom, clean energy for everyone!

 

[Silvanus]

The power of to be invisible, so long as no one's watching. Like the fella from Mystery Men.

 

[F'Angus]

The power to change all your blood into sour milk.

Don't reckon you or anybody else would want you to use that.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

The power to make popcorn pop without a microwave.

Because there are so many situations where it could be useful...

I picture you standing in a giant cornfield, somewhere in the US, your rage flowing freely, suddenly small pops setting of around you, swelling to a veritable cacophony of noise, as you pop every single corncob around you.

Your wrath unleashes a wave of popcorn that shall bury the US under a pile of almost healthy treats.

I...I could destry the US with popcorn?

Screw terrorism, popcorn is the deadliest thing known to the US populace!

Prepare to be buried under a pile of popcorn...that isn't salted...

I like it already.

See, your superpower is far from useless.
And "PREPARE TO FEEL THE WRATH OF TIZZY THE TORMENTOR" has a nice ring to it.
Also, who would ever see a Popcorn-apocalypse coming?

I know I would!

But useless...

How about the ability to eat grass without getting sick?

You would never have to pay for food again, you could subsit forever on green plants alone, making you the perfect survivalist....

 

[tabriaswolfe]

The ability to make paint dry! No more staring at it for hours.

 

[FalloutJack]

It's a toss-up between the coin-tricking telekinetics from Looper and being able to fart from your mouth.

 

[Dan Steele]

The power to open blinds without touching them

 

[loc978]

Levitation sounds incredibly useful for anyone with any semblance of an active lifestyle. You'd never need a ladder again... also, it would be great for rock climbing.

For useless, I'm going to go with the ability to spray blood out of one's urethra at will. It would have the pressure of a firehose (thereby qualifying it as an actual superpower), but would be limited by the blood you have in your body- the same as any other blood loss.

 

[gewata]

This has to be pretty up there.

Also the ability to see exactly 1/2 a second into the future.

 

[Mau95]

Speaking to fish ( Aquaman ).
The power of heart ( the asian guy from captain planet )
Fireworks ( Jubilee )
Laying eggs ( Easter bunny ).

And for the record i know little about superheros and superpowers .

Those are kinda useful, you could become an animal doctor or a motivational speaker.
How about the power to make your eyes change color? Or teleporting 5 meters away after concentrating for a minute?

 

[Keymik]

The power to sense other superpowers. Useless if you got it in the real world because people doesn't have any.. And even if you get it in a world with superpowers all it would really be good for would be to avoid certain people..
I've brought this up with other people and they would always say that if you got it in a world with superpowers you could be part of some goverment thing and point out people with superpowers..
Yeah that's all good and all.. But I think people with superpowers will quickly realise ''Hey.. We should kill that guy who keeps pointing us out!''

 

[2xDouble]

The ability to talk to humans.

The ability to see in the dark, powered by direct sunlight.

Immunity to unicorns.

The power to melt [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GihnbWsv_1U].

And the most useless superpower of all:
Cancer.

 

[loc978]

For useless, I'm going to go with the ability to spray blood out of one's urethra at will. It would have the pressure of a firehose, but would be limited by the blood you have in your body- the same as any other blood loss.

Dude, that would scare the shit out of someone if they were attacking you!

Only if you got your pants down in time, which is really unlikely. Otherwise you'd just look like your crotch is bleeding.

 

[Kizi]

Solar-powered night vision.

Edit: Apparently I was ninja'd.