I thought this had died, I'll do my best to revive my train of thought.
evilthecat said:
kurupt87 said:
Well, blimey. You're an authoritarian? We won't be finding much common ground then, will we?
Umm..
If I remember correctly I read something that you put "as imposing your choice -"it was something about societal makeup I think"- upon people whether they liked it or not". I've had a quick rescan and can't find the part I mean, so as I can't back that up I apologise for the assertion.
kurupt87 said:
To state choices not made in vacuum (the vacuum being one where all knowledge is present or all unforseen consequences are absent) are irrelevant is to say all choices are irrelevant.
Go back to my post. Look for the word 'irrelevant'.
You were dismissive, you didn't claim complete irrelevancy though. Bad choice of adjective on my part.
My point is that liberals have tended to take choice as symptomatic of the ultimate moral good, while systematically denying the right of choice to those whose lifestyles don't fit the liberal model (so a Western woman can always legitimately choose to get married, but an Islamic woman has to proove that she can legitimate choose to wear the veil, for example). It's an offensive double standard which is actually not based on choice at all, but on a highly universalized idea of what human beings would want.
Seriously, dig into the logic which underpins your valuing of choice and you'll find that choice is always socially limited. It's a given liberal assumption that noone can choose something which is 'harmful' for them, the definition of harm already having been set by a particular group of people (generally white men). So why is marriage an acceptable choice for you, given the widespread nature of marital abuse, wheras injecting heroin into your eyelids or immolating yourself on your husband's funeral pyre is not?
Now you're asserting I'm an Authoritarian! You're equating me, as an individual, with our society and government.
Yes, our values and indirectly our choices are decided upon by the society we find ourselves in. We can judge other cultures and the things they get up to but not impose (I was going to state exceptions, gave up, too complicated and long winded). If someone chooses to join our society they will be integrated, if they weren't they'd cause themselves and others harm, but our society will itself adapt some small way to having someone with different views in it. They have also made a subconscious acknowledgement that they view our society as better than their own; they've chosen to leave their own and join ours afterall.
Marriage? Again, assumptions can bite you in the arse. I'm not a big fan of marriage, never really seen the point other than a way in which Organised Religion has control over our lives or, a more modern view, some sort of arbitrary life goal for women. Obviously there are tax reasons but they're not exactly winning me over.
Heroin in the eyelids? Well I can't say I know what that would do, besides numb the bejeesus out of them. Again, your assumptions come back at you; I don't support the illegalisation of drugs. Given the power and trust (and several minutes thought on summing up my feelings) I would implement a personalised ration system for, and intensive education about, recreational drugs; bar weed of course. You can smoke that till your eyeballs fall out. I wouldn't recommend doing what you suggested but I wouldn't stop someone doing it.
Self immolation? Again, based on a couple of minutes thought I'd suggest a system where this person asks for permission to do this and is submitted to a series of tests to ensure there is no way to help this person, or indeed if they even need help, before giving permission to proceed. But, ultimately it's up to them. Again, obviously not something I would recommend.
kurupt87 said:
You're angry that people have to do things that they'd rather not? Life is not fair, post-scarcity society aside it never will be. This is an argument of the have-nots against the haves; why do the poor have to work while the rich get to play?
Way to miss the point.
So your point was that you take a cold, clinical interest in this field? The fact that you are a lesbian in a world where that is not the norm does not colour your interest at all?
kurupt87 said:
Who's listened to within a social arena depends entirely upon the social arena (ie. the why/how of it) and, if a small one, the individuals that make it up.
If you honestly think that a daycare circle has as much social influence as the elected government, then I give up on this discussion.
Again, the fact that these things are generalizations does make those generalizations completely irrelevant, because they are overwhelmingly accurate. It means you can't assume a simple, one size fits all solution, but what you're doing is refusing to even consider that there's a problem requiring a solution, with the most tired argument of 'that's just how it is'.
Society is the way it is. To think societal change happens fast (bar revolutions) is wishful thinking, I know you aren't suggesting that but it's an important point I think.
We just currently have the society of those at least one generation above us being the one that is in charge and imposed by government. Once our generation is in charge things will be different, every generation makes changes. I think I'm right in saying that there are far more female students graduating with degrees than males right now, once this wave is in charge things will be even more different.
I also wouldn't be so quick to discard the opinion of a Knitting Circle. At least in the groups I've hung around with men are more interested in discussing things that interest them; they leave important matters private and come to their own conclusions. Women are more likely to talk to each other about things and make judgements upon them as a group, albeit one with one woman who steers the rest. They then share these views with their partners and friends, influencing the view of people not even there to start with. Women are viewed as the moral arbiters of society, rightly or wrongly, because of their pervasive gossip.
kurupt87 said:
I came to the word gender through Biology where it is a synonym for sex, that is all. (De-!)Evolution of language happens but I don't have to like it.
Well.. if you want to ignore 60 years of intellectual history (except the bits stemming from your discipline), good luck in biology. You'll fit right in.
Ha, I guess that wasn't funny then. In that case, I'll stick to salient points and avoid jokes. I'm also not over 60...
Also, was that some sort of dismission of the entire field of Biology? What did they do to piss you off?
kurupt87 said:
Anyway, just how stereotypically feminine are you?
I'll take that as a compliment under the circumstances, particularly if the alternative is a cynical dependence on an unequal and let's not forget unchosen mode of social organization to derive some sense of self.
People can be judged on what they do, yes, but that's not what we're talking about. What you're talking about is having the approximate shape of someone's genitals determine their entire life expectations. I happen to think that's a bit odd.
It wasn't an insult either, don't worry.
No, what I was talking about was you not being happy with the cards you've been dealt and being angry at society because of that. (I was going to delete that sentence and rewrite it, it suggests that you aren't happy with who you are, something I believe the opposite of concerning yourself and didn't mean to imply. I will let it stand though, and this correction, to give you a view of how I see you.) No, I was talking about how you resent the world for arbitrarily deciding you're different and giving you punishment because of it. That seems to be the reason you are interested in this entire topic to begin with. You seem to be on a quest to legitamise yourself to the world by attacking it and wanting to change it.
That is a perfectly valid reason, a personal reason to get into something is a wonderful motivator, and I quite agree with you that the world does harshly judge those like yourself for completely arbitrary reasons, resulting in harm and hurt to many people. What I disagree with is imposing change; you are the one who wants to change the world. Do not the racists and the homophobes and the sexists have a right to their own views? Even as wrong and bigotted as we see them.
This is just an argument over nothing though, you could no sooner impose change or punish these people (even though I don't think you would) than you could fly to the moon and back. Yes, our society needs edging toward a more accepting viewpoint. (This already exists to a certain point in my country by the way, Britain has been ruled by homosexuals for hundreds of years (Disclaimer: mild joke). Coming out is still hard though, so I'm told, so we still have a way to go. Being gay is nothing like as bad as it seems to be in America for middle or upper class Britain. Even lower class Britain is surprisingly accepting in my experience.).
Back to my point, which I will now do you the decency of explaining. I question your motives for change, they are not purely for improving society but changing it so that you fit it better; how is that different to what a racist or homophobe would do? Point: you're not objective enough.
That is extremely personal, and pretty judgemental, and I won't be surprised if you tell me to fuck right off; I probably would in your shoes. I am being honest about my thoughts, so take that as you will.
kurupt87 said:
The woman alpha sub is a victim that should be pitied, the male alpha dom is a bastard to be condemned. Notice the inclusion of sex there; a female alpha dom is laudable and the same for a male alpha sub.
Err.. no..
Since we're getting into D/s terminology, I know a great deal of explicitly dominant men who I think are great and whom I would trust with any woman (or man) you could name. Likewise, I know a lot of female submissives who are intelligent, high powered and pretty aware of the gendering inherent in their position. What I have a problem with is the unconscious assumption of those roles by the vast majority of the human race and the constant repetition of those roles in media and society as a whole.
Again, you're taking choice as the ultimate moral issue while ignoring the difficulties and limitations of making certain choices. It's all okay as long as everyone consents, so long as
you can't see any harm.
I don't think the number of dominant women will ever exceed the number of dominant men; testosterone for one just won't allow it. Men and women are different at a biological level, enforcing roles because of this difference is wrong but ignoring that difference is stupid. Women and men are quite clearly capable of fulfilling their traditionally opposite role but it requires more effort and a more developed self.
You seem to equate ok with "the right choice" rather than a permissible one. I'm not, stop implying I am. There are consequences to being submissive and to being dominant, how far you choose to mould your personality to these traits is an individual choice that requires serious contemplation. Take me for example, socially I am submissive but sexually I'm dominant. Both of those choices have consequences, good and bad, and neither is right or wrong. Choice is the wrong word here really, these are aspects of my self that I have accepted and developed to what I am happy with.
Oh, and as a sexually dominant man I certainly feel vilified. I don't really care as people who think that can go sod themselves but that doesn't mean the feeling isn't there. This isn't within male groups obviously, this is when socialising in mixed groups or listening to the media. This is why I claimed confidently in my previous post that there are sharking women out there, they're attracted to me because I'm quiet in social situations and assume I'm of a like mind in the bedroom. Amusingly pushy, some of them.
kurupt87 said:
And yet how often are Humanists put before us? How often is feminism?
If the answer to that question isn't obvious, I'm not sure you're quite understanding what a humanist is.
That could well be the case.
A humanist is a person who takes the human subject as central to understanding, and who views all humans as possessing some kind of commonality which allows you to call them 'human'. Does that principle sound familiar?
Not particularly. I fear I used the wrong word, just assuming a Humanist would be synonomous with an "Equalist", if such a word exists. Many apologies.
Maybe the reason you don't see it is because it doesn't even need to be articulated. It's been the basis of scholarship and social organization for so long that it's pretty much an unwritten assumption.
The problem is that humanism has consistently failed to incorporate on an equal footing those 'human' experiences which do not match those of socially dominant white men, because to a certain extent the term 'human' is biased to refer to socially dominant white men as the default. Feminism's deliberate use of the marked category is really no less inclusive when you dig into it.
Women exist in relation to the gendered concept of human.
Men exist in relation to the gendered concept of 'fem'.
If evidence had consistently shown that 'humanists' were able to extend genuine centrality to female subjects, we would never have needed the term feminism, but why would I want to share a department and a platform with people who consistently write about male experiences as if they're universal?
Thank you for your view on Humanism, I will bear it in mind as I embark on a quest to educate myself about it in order to not make a fool of myself in the future.