***Author's Note: Fucking Verizon!!***
Where were we? Ah yes...
Despite how dumb an idea it might sound to go along with a bomb-collaring, William didn't have much of a choice. It was either that or the Secret Garden routine, and believe you me...we don't need to go down that particular Johnny Depp trip, okay? So, the Lady Captain led him to the room in which the thing would be installed...by a Latino man in a lab coat. Don't...think too hard on that one. Upon being asked about the transceiver, Alice cleared it up for him as the scientist put the collar on.
Alice: That's the general idea. We had an earlier version of this on a guy called Plisskin, but it was just a slave collar with a tracking device. And unfortunately, Snake was clever enough to get it around someone else's neck, so when we blew it...well, we blew it, basically.
The collar was checked out and then she led Will to the opened grate, where he would have to crawl into the place...much like Bishop from Aliens. That wasn't a very pleasant-sounding thing. Let's move on to Evan and Dudley, huh?
Dudley: WHAARRRRF!!!
Or...maybe not?
FalloutJack: Dude, what the hell? I was just gonna do a quick scan, ask a few questions. I save the rough stuff for raiders and shit.
Evan: I think he was thinking of a different kind of processing. Like...meat processing.
FalloutJack: Oh. Ohhhh... Awkward...
He called in a pair of recruits to pull him over to the guard station, where before they did anything else, they doused him with a few buckets of water to clean him up and get his head back in the game. The guard station had a few guards, a few chairs, a few tables with things on them, and...a computer with a scanner. The scanner indicated the physical health and basic contents of of a being. It was, in fact, a medical scanner from an autodoc.
FalloutJack: Okay...so one of you is a bona fide wastelander and one of you is clearly an ex-Vaulty. Gee, I wonder which one's which. Alright, boys. You take Glasses. I'll handle Barf Lad.
There were a few small rooms for interrogation. Jack escorted Dudley to one and proceeded with...question number one.
FalloutJack: You're in a desert, and you see below you...a turtle that's gotten stuck on its back. You see that it is unable to turn over back onto its feet. Now, why aren't you helping it?
Huh? What the broiling fuck was he doing?
FalloutJack: In your own words, describe the fondest memory of your own mother.
Wait, is he...?
FalloutJack: These tests are completely standard.
Yyyyup... Blade Runner for the win!
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It was a distinctive problem for Abe and Crawver. They had been accosted by these ghouls in cloaks, right? Cultists who seem to worship 'The Wet One', which appeared to be Crawver? And they had been led by the Red Guy, who had even had Udders? So, all in all that's a good day for them, isn't it? Only...there was one...small issue. THEY WOULDN'T LEAVE THEM ALONE!! They kept - every now and then - going on about the blessed Skyfall, the Reign of Water, and the calling of the Wet Ones. Clearly, this was about the recent rains of pure water. In fact, it even happened around them from time to time, like a miracle. But...they kept shouting on and on about finding the place of calling, the center place, the grand structure. Even the Red Guy was in on it.
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Now, do please get into the head of the man who decided to contront our man, Stormy. He's a guy getting on a bit in years, but he's got alot of experience and has seen alot in his day...and now this: Some glowy-eyed guy in what most people can identify as NCR Ranger armor - no helmet - with a very official-sounding mode of speech that uncomfortably reminded him of the very Enclave the boy appeared to be looking for. The rifleman, who might resemble a certain rendition of Slim Pickens, answered the question put forth to him.
Taggert: Well, I'll tell you, boy. I ain't seen very much of them, except the first, on account of the lady-in-armor at the bar with her boys standing idle. They all stand around while she says she's 'running tests', until she sends one of 'em off to DO something. Doesn't take a genius to figure all the other Enclavers in there are actually robots, 'cause they never talk or drink or anything else. If you've got any business with 'em, my only say in it is try not to blow it all up.
That was when a younger townsgoer came up to him and whispered in his ear...badly.
"Whisper whisper whisper REALLY whisper whisper BIG whisper whisper whisper MIRELURK whisper whisper..."
Taggert: What in wide world of sports are you talking about?!
Ah, well...if you just follow him to a spot beyond this one house that puts the Nuka Cola Factory in view, you could see that...yes...there was a big glowing crab monster out there, one that looked large and deadly enough to wreck buildings.
Taggert: Well, hoooly shit. I thought that Mr. Estabahn had the place figured out. That's gonna put a mighty pinch on the product...
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Uhhh, let's deal with Stan first. He had gotten himself all nice and out of the way of the menacing monster and its chase-down of Danielle and Wayne. He had, instead, wandered into the DC area, found a patrol of Brotherhood of Steel soldiers, all of whom were being advised of a giant monster approaching the area.
BoS Soldier: What, AGAIN?! How many fucking times is this gonna happen?
Okay, back to the fight now. Those two had done a bit of damage and indeed seemed to be leading it on. The thing was...this big stomping monster was NOT known for its speed. It was known for its relentlessness and destructive force. Oh, there was one OTHER thing to take note of...
The giant crustacean let out a hissing snarl loud enough to wake the dead...and then all of its glowy-bits began to brighten as apparently some large bolts flew off of its top-back from somewhere as it opened its mouth to unleash a beam of glowing-blue...uhhh...Nuka Cola Quantum. Yeah, this high-pressure blast of radioactive liquid was not a super-destructive death-breath, but a tide of the soda-stuff. It wouldn't vaporize Danielle, whom it headed right for, but she'd be needing Rad-X and Radaway soon enough. Also, the sudden surge in energy grew back the parts that's been hurt! Problems? Oh yes.
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We dunno what Johnny-boy's been smoking there, folks, but we've established that it's only so-and-so years after the third game, so the cast was actually quite alive, sort of why - you know - Three Dog was around? And Sarah Lyons? And Lucus Simms? Yeah. Sorry, boy. As for the Caravan Master, he growned as he woke up, and then groaned again when he saw who was doing the waking. That said, what followed next was a...bit of an unexpected moment in time. You could call it an impossibility, or a completely random event, or even batshit crazy. We prefer to call it a glitch.
What happened was...against all reason...a completely-intact Robobrain fell on the Caravan Master from high up, killing him stone dead. The robot, meanwhile, activated on its own, looked around with a few hums and beeps, and then activated a holo-recording from an emitter on its body. There, the visual of a man who looked like he might have a good use for the built-in seat installed on this robot was heard to say and repeat...
"...Huh? What the hell is this?...Huh? What the hell is this?...Huh? What the hell is this?..."
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MEANWHILE...remember how there was this talk of three Behemoths chasing a ghoul in a jeep? Well...out of nowhere...a robot wielding mini-nukes cae out of nowhere, jumping down from a building, off against the back of the jeep, and into the trio of bad boys!
Liberty Minor, ladies and gentlemen! The small-scale version of Prime kicked into the face of one behemoth right off, jumping off of it to punch into the mouth of the second with a mini-nuke and setting it off as it then leapt at the third one as the first was getting up. And that, everybody, was one round of FEAR TEH LAZORFACE as LM blasted the big mutant point-blank, leaving just the two living combatants.
Liberty Minor: One shall stand, one shall fall...
"WHY THROW YOUR LIFE AWAY SO RECKLESSLY?"
Liberty Minor: That's a question you should ask yourself, communist.
But we know how this is going to end. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpAY3MwNRTw] It's Liberty, after all.
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Now, the meeting was being held and Sarah first heard Lucy's take on the matter. Fooling the Enclave sounded like a good idea, if possible, but then again why not let the also clean up their own man? She'd reserve judgement on that. As for restocking.
Sarah: I don't have a problem with any of you stocking up for this. You'll need it.
This led into Frank's opening commentary, in which the Elder said "Shut up" and then turned onto the next person...which was Barry describing his experiences with the Enclave AT THEIR BASE amongst other things, to which Frank decided to interrupt again.
Sarah: Look, if it makes you feel any better, it was good to see dat ass again, now give us a break, Frank.
What then followed was Shifty's idea of using his practice as a means of delivering the super mutants the idea of a healthy supply of Soylent Green for the Doc to feed his army with. A bit risky, but she made a note of it. Sneaking in might work better, if the Behemoths in question didn't just ate everyone on sight. Fortunately, Frank's brain returned when the coffee came in and pointed out the very risk of Behemoth proportions.
"There's a behemoth-sized problem with your plan; mutants aren't the type to engage in commerce. They take what they want. I've got a plan, but it involves airdrops, and I don't think you guys are too fond of those. Any ideas?"
Sarah: There's a rule from The Seven Habits of Highly-Effective Pirates which reads 'Everything is air-droppable once'. And that was actually part of my attack plan, really. So that's three different plans, so far.
That was when reports of a giant frigging crabcake came in and Frank wanted a man in the air imediately. Sarah decided to give this a shot and get Gilford into the air, who immediately had to question just what the hell they meant by 'pulling the raid boss'.
Sarah: You're gonna try to lead that thing up North to the Doc, aren't you?
