The Sims 3 berates you for having a child out of 'wedlock' Yes they use that word...

[mr.mystery]

I usually dont post on these forums. Speaking as a child out of wedlock....

Holy fucking shit. This is the worst thing ive ever heard of in gaming. I hate the Sims games

 

[alandavidson]

What shame is there in raising a child as a single parent? And what 'bad reasons' do people have for not getting married? Because in my experience, I've never come across any untoward reasons for people not anting to marry.

If they are a single parent for a reason like their partner died, there's no shame. But if they knowingly decide to do so it's just irresponsible and if you look into the persons history you'll always find a track record of cheating, one night-stands, etc.

One of the common reasons for not wanting to marry that I've heard is "not wanting the responsibility of marriage," yet still having kids. Which does well to show just where that person is at.

There is a very strong effort to destroy the family going on these days, as the family is the last group that has any real strength left in it now that religious groups have mostly been destroyed.

Once families are fully destroyed society will be totally screwed and civilization will end with a whimper.

...And where do you find evidence of this? While the family is important, it is not the end-all. What is more important is a loving support system.
And where do find the evidence of a strong effort to destroy the family?

 

[TheGreatCoolEnergy]

Wow. I'm actually surprised at this. This is exactly the kind of thing that media outlets love to hype and yet no one has mentioned this before?

Except most media supports the "Marriage first" view point, which is why this has stayed quiet.

 

[Moromillas]

Goddammit. It looks or seems like games are still stuck in the 90s. Sexual content in games is either controversial or giggled at, difficult themes are met with stoneface, and today having a child outside of "wedlock." Jesus Christ, when are games not going to be viewed by some as children's toys.

 

[Oz Draconis]

Does society really feel that way? Marriage is fucking pointless when it's not harmful.

I'm sorry but that statement is HILARIOUS when paired with your username. ^-^

 

[Snowy Rainbow]

She hasn't even slept with anyone else (poor gal lol)

You had me on your side right up until you made that joke.

It's not that I'm offended or disagree with you (wedlock is an outdated social construct used to buy and trade women). Not at all. Rather, your joke made me realize that people view things differently; having sex with half the town - bad in some eyes; having a baby out of wedlock - bad in some eyes; being a virgin - bad in some eyes.

I guess I'm trying to say: don't expect a game to align with your ethics just because they're yours.

 

[Norendithas]

Rather funny, haha. A little over the top though. I don't think that in today's society having a child out of wedlock is as bad as it used to be. Some people just don't get married in the first place. I know in the case of my parents, I was about 13 months old when they got married. But it wasn't that bad because they had been together for almost 5 years at that point. Now, they're still happily married.

 

[Trippy Turtle]

Snip

My male character got it and he has another 2 people in his house. To be completely fair I think that people would go stupid over it if (Insert massive famous celebrity here) had a baby without getting married.

 

[Therumancer]

I can understand if not many people on this site care about the Sims 3 or what goes on in relation to it but I would just like to draw your attention to this;

Your female sim is the only one who recieves the 'shame' for this 'heinous act' Also note the term 'bad actions' and 'innapropriate behaiviour' :|...

Personally it made my blood boil. There is absolutely no shame in having children out of wedlock these days and many couple choose to remain unmarried because of cost and also religious (or lack of) beliefs.

So despite your feelings on the Sims 3 what do you make of this??

(If this should be in off topic then please move I was unsure where to put it)

Edit: I'd just like to point out that my sim is a celebrity and this is why this message appeared, It's still not justified though...

Edit 2: Maxis did not make The Sims 3...look it up >_>

Edit: Update: My friend who also plays reports that the man also gets the debuff but only if he's the only one in the household. :/ I still think it's a little off that in my household only the lady got it. But at least we don't have sexism to add to the madness. Just thought I would add that for clarity.

Well, your projecting your own views onto society as a whole and trying to speak for "people in general". To be honest, single parents, especially single mothers DO run into some problems and stigmas. You might not like it, but that's the world we live in, and The Sims is simply being accurate about the reaction.


I haven't done much with The Sims (have trouble running it for some strange reason) but as I understand things various Sims have differant personality traits assigned to them, and some, like you, are going to be more understanding than the default reaction.

Feel free to disagree with society, and the whole "family values" platform, but I don't think it's wrong to say that The Sims is out of line in how it presents things.

Heck, consider that unwed mothers are a common "freak of the week" for TV talk shows and the like for a reason. While it's died down a bit, one of the big gimmicks for various shows was to get single mothers on and play "whose the Baby's daddy" with all the guys she slept with and DNA paternity tests, or simply to find out of her boyfriend is actually the one who fathered the child (with several possible reasons for the test being done). Call it lowbrow, and feel free to criticize society, but people watch this stuff because of exactly that kind of pariah factor.

That said, since this "life sim" includes mechanics for developing immortality fruits, becoming a vampire, mastering martial arts, and then fighting mummies... not to mention "Super Villain" being a viable career goal, I don't think the game's social commentary can be taken paticularly seriously.

 

[Sarge034]

I might have to get the Sims 3 now. Just to make the uber conservatives mad at the numerous children I have out of wedlock!

 

[b3nn3tt]

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I see what you're saying, but you hit the tip of the issue with that thing about deciding how long they have to live together; not only do you have to decide that, but you have to be able to prove it, and there's all sorts of other issues -- for example, when you decide to split up after a commonlaw marriage, how do you divide the property? Standard marriage contracts have provisions for this, and the pre-nup is an additional contract that allows for more equitable provisions, but it's got to be difficult to do this with a commonlaw marriage. Add this to the fact that you would have to prove co-habitation, and the fact that you wouldn't have the rights of a marriage for all the years that you were trying to prove it, and a simple marriage contract starts to look a lot better.

All very true. I suppose the only way to really do it would be with a contract, and in that case you may as well just get married.

I still don't think it's right for the Sims to shame you for not being married though! Just to bring this back to the topic.

 

[PleasantAsAHeadcrab]

It only happens to celebrities, I think...
And really, it's not that bad.
When a pretty, single little starlet suddenly pops out a kid, doesn't the media whip itself into a frenzy?

Don't get your panties in a bunch.

 

[SinisterGehe]

Personally it made my blood boil. There is absolutely no shame in having children out of wedlock these days and many couple choose to remain unmarried because of cost and also religious (or lack of) beliefs.

I like it. There is shame in intentionally having kids as a single parent and couples who choose to remain unmarried in my experience have only bad reasons for doing so.

Nice to see a piece of modern media actually shoving that in peoples faces a bit.

SO people are not allowed to be in a type relationships they want to be in? I know plenty of couples that are together un-married and have child, funny thing is that their relationship seems to be healthier than people who are married. You know, they trust each other with needing legal contracts, I see nothing wrong with that.
Also are you against parents who have a child because they broke up? Or against mothers who give birth after they have broken up or became widowed, you saying these people HAVE to get married - because they have a child.

Please sit/ma'am, open your eyes and see that only thing that matters in this world is everyones personal happiness, if being out of unmarried and having a family makes the family happy - you have no right to say anything to them.

Showing you beliefs to someone is wrong, everyone has the right (according to UN) to live with freedom of opinion/belief and right to live as they see fit.

 

[feather240]

It's just a game, no need to be angry.

Many people do, in fact, look down on out of wedlock pregnancies. I never thought this would be so shocking to people.

This.

If anything I'm impressed that the game had the feature.

 

[lord canti]

You know every time I see something like this here I can imagine all the members of the escapist monocles popping out and going ' I say '.

 

[Matthew Valkanov]

What shame is there in raising a child as a single parent? And what 'bad reasons' do people have for not getting married? Because in my experience, I've never come across any untoward reasons for people not anting to marry.

OT: I don't think there's any justification for having this in a game, I have no idea what the developers were thinking.

Not that I agree that single parenthood is shameful, but there is one untoward reason for not marrying that I can think of : benefits. In Britain there's a somewhat disgusting situation where quite a few(no, I don't have the numbers)young mothers refuse to get married or even let the fathers help in raising the child because they would get less money from the State than if they were a single mother.

As for having this in a game, well, as far as I understand it this is not the character being ashamed but rather the public masses being prejudiced. That's not that far removed from real life so can't disagree with it on a moral point. Unless I misunderstood what the debuff was exactly?
But since it's a game, and meant to be fun, I agree that it might not have it's place there.

 

[b3nn3tt]

I like it. There is shame in intentionally having kids as a single parent and couples who choose to remain unmarried in my experience have only bad reasons for doing so.

Nice to see a piece of modern media actually shoving that in peoples faces a bit.

What shame is there in raising a child as a single parent? And what 'bad reasons' do people have for not getting married? Because in my experience, I've never come across any untoward reasons for people not anting to marry.

OT: I don't think there's any justification for having this in a game, I have no idea what the developers were thinking.

Not that I agree that single parenthood is shameful, but there is one untoward reason for not marrying that I can think of : benefits. In Britain there's a somewhat disgusting situation where quite a few(no, I don't have the numbers)young mothers refuse to get married or even let the fathers help in raising the child because they would get less money from the State than if they were a single mother.

Well, I do agree that people refusing to marry to be able to claim benefits isn't right, I imagine that there are any number of people who also just don't want to marry. Especially in the case of the OP's Sim, who was engaged.

 

[Matthew Valkanov]

I like it. There is shame in intentionally having kids as a single parent and couples who choose to remain unmarried in my experience have only bad reasons for doing so.

Nice to see a piece of modern media actually shoving that in peoples faces a bit.

What shame is there in raising a child as a single parent? And what 'bad reasons' do people have for not getting married? Because in my experience, I've never come across any untoward reasons for people not anting to marry.

OT: I don't think there's any justification for having this in a game, I have no idea what the developers were thinking.

Not that I agree that single parenthood is shameful, but there is one untoward reason for not marrying that I can think of : benefits. In Britain there's a somewhat disgusting situation where quite a few(no, I don't have the numbers)young mothers refuse to get married or even let the fathers help in raising the child because they would get less money from the State than if they were a single mother.

Well, I do agree that people refusing to marry to be able to claim benefits isn't right, I imagine that there are any number of people who also just don't want to marry. Especially in the case of the OP's Sim, who was engaged.

Wow wow wow! I never wrote the "I like it." bit, I just quoted it -_- For some reason the quotes are bugging on me.

Anyway, yeah, I don't disagree that there are people who, for whatever reason, just don;t want to get married. Just thought I'd point out one untoward reason for not getting married ^^

 

[b3nn3tt]

Wow wow wow! I never wrote the "I like it." bit, I just quoted it -_- For some reason the quotes are bugging on me.

Anyway, yeah, I don't disagree that there are people who, for whatever reason, just don;t want to get married. Just thought I'd point out one untoward reason for not getting married ^^

Ah, my bad, though that was your post.

That is certainly a bad reason for not getting married, but I suppose you can never really know someone's motivation.