The Things You Do For a Social Life...

[Eggsnham]

I'm sorry but who doesn't shower every morning or after sport or exercise?
That isn't trying to fit in. That's self respect.

Well sport and exercise is one thing, but if I wake up ten minutes before I'm supposed to be in school, my hair isn't nasty, and I can just put on deodorant to mask any potential smell, then a shower isn't happening.

Like I said, if you're the type of person who needs to shower every day, then that's self respect, but if you can get by on a slightly less regular basis, then that's fine.

I'm not saying you should give up on personal hygiene, I'm just saying that we shouldn't feel the need to hold it so high when we don't necessarily need to.

 

[Eggsnham]

OP: You try to portray some of these things as if they are somehow ridiculous or irrational. To me, most of them qualify as just being considerate of others, whether you want them in your social group or not. I shower every day for the sake of everyone that meets me; I don't particularly care if the random bloke that sits next to me on the bus is never going to be my friend, but I would hate it if he smelled and I should show him the same courtesy.

Also, I don't know what sort of people you hang around with but I know people that wear the same stuff pretty much every day and people don't bat an eyelid about it. I have 2 pairs of jeans and maybe 5 t-shirts and a couple of shirts that I wear regularly and nobody gives a shit.
And sex is a taboo topic? Really? Ok, there are some people that definitely get a bit awkward around the topic, but most people I know treat it like pretty much any other topic of conversation. I can't think of that many topics that I've not talked about for fear that I would lose friends. I mean, literally today I had a conversation about how we didn't know that many black people and another conversation with a completely different group of people about disgusting sex acts. Both these were with mixed groups and completely sober.
Unless you are referring to just being tactless, but I think that just comes under the bracket of "not being a dick".

Well, to clarify some things here:

I'm in highschool, so everybody's trying to prove themselves to everybody. And naturally going overboard.

EDIT: Also, sorry for quad-posting. I didn't really notice that until now.

 

[Raziel_Likes_Souls]

I keep myself clean and pretend to not like Battlefield 'Nam over MW2. And boy, is it tough.

 

[Ambi]

The largest sacrifice I make to be social is...you know...having to actually talk to other people. Who needs that, you know?

I'll wear some types of clothes multiple times, and I'll be damned if I buy new clothes every week. That's just commercialism brainwashing bullshit. I don't throw things out that are still serviceable either. I've seriously known people to throw out a shirt because one button came off. I mean...seriously? Pick up a needle and thread; it's not THAT hard...

I know, right? Or find a goddamn safety pin <_<

I refrain from wearing overly shabby clothes around friends who will say "darl, why don't you buy yourself some new clothes?" partially so I can refrain from rambling about sweatshop labour and feeling like a consumer-whore because I would be insulting them (and I'd feel like a hypocrite on some level anyway), I waste money around them, I tolerate their music, I refrain from being a smart-arse and debating them when they're having their naive religious discussions, and I let them dress me in clothes and makeup I wouldn't usually wear. I know my limits with different friends.

 

[the Dept of Science]

OP: You try to portray some of these things as if they are somehow ridiculous or irrational. To me, most of them qualify as just being considerate of others, whether you want them in your social group or not. I shower every day for the sake of everyone that meets me; I don't particularly care if the random bloke that sits next to me on the bus is never going to be my friend, but I would hate it if he smelled and I should show him the same courtesy.

Also, I don't know what sort of people you hang around with but I know people that wear the same stuff pretty much every day and people don't bat an eyelid about it. I have 2 pairs of jeans and maybe 5 t-shirts and a couple of shirts that I wear regularly and nobody gives a shit.
And sex is a taboo topic? Really? Ok, there are some people that definitely get a bit awkward around the topic, but most people I know treat it like pretty much any other topic of conversation. I can't think of that many topics that I've not talked about for fear that I would lose friends. I mean, literally today I had a conversation about how we didn't know that many black people and another conversation with a completely different group of people about disgusting sex acts. Both these were with mixed groups and completely sober.
Unless you are referring to just being tactless, but I think that just comes under the bracket of "not being a dick".

Well, to clarify some things here:

I'm in highschool, so everybody's trying to prove themselves to everybody. And naturally going overboard.

EDIT: Also, sorry for quad-posting. I didn't really notice that until now.

Oh Highschool relationships are silly? Yea, this has been pointed out by pretty much every decent high school movie ever made. Yea, they are cliquey and follow some pretty ridiculous social conventions (although not so much the ones that you were pointing out). People that would probably get along fine are expected not to like each other because of different interests/tastes/clothes, people have very strong expectations of how they are meant to act and what they are meant to like (in ways that are totally divorced from common sense social expectations).
You know that that all pretty much stops after high school?
Once people get out in the real world and they realise that they can find a group of people that don't give a shit about how they dress or what they listen to it gets way better. People say that school is the best years of your life but I think thats BS.

 

[similar.squirrel]

Oh, wow. This is possibly the nerdiest thing I've read on these forums.

 

[Mr Fatherland]

I just be me ya' know. I shower irregularly. Get changed irregularly. I do things when I want to. I visit the local hang a few times a month. I meet a lot of new people through my other friends so that's all good. I start college later this year so I need to make a good impression, which I'm fairly confident I'll be able to do. I have no trouble in making new friends and maintaining existing relationships.

Apart from the basics of staying clean and presentable I get by just by being me.

 

[Creator002]

Well, since I socialise with two other social retards (as in, when it comes to socialising with others, we're a bit awkward) I usually don't do any of that stuff others do.
For example, I only shower and change clothes when my own smell bothers me, which has been 3 days ago now and I haven't bought any new clothes for ages now.
I also have a Facebook, but no one needs to hang out with me to socialise on that (thank God).

 

[Nickolai77]

I can't say i buy new clothes regularly for the sake of a social life, i mean the trousers i'm wearing now i've had for about four years...Maybe it's true for girls but not so much guy's.

Things for a social life: All you need to do is be nice and friendly to people around you, ask how they are and find what interests them and such. Make interesting conversation, and if they invite you anywhere, unless you have a very good reason not to, go along and never turn the offer down.

 

[Bajinga]

When I read that people do things to fit in.

I thought of people that go to gym's on a regular basis.
Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with people who go because it brings joy to them.
I'm talking about the people who can't stand anyone who doesn't go, and does it so that they fit in with the "cool kids". I remember trying to fit in with a group of people, and they were talking about how much they were lifting. They were also touching each other and me because they wanted to check each others progress and show off.


Socializing is rubbish.

 

[Eggsnham]

Oh, wow. This is possibly the nerdiest thing I've read on these forums.

Are you meaning nerdy or realistic?

Honestly, what's the hang up with clothing and hygiene.

I'm not saying that you should completely disregard your personal hygiene and let yourself smell every day, I'm saying that if you can go an extra day without showering, then it shouldn't be a big problem to other people as long as you smell decent.

And with clothing, what's the big fucking deal with that? Why should one need to spend ridiculous amounts of time and money on pieces of fabric that are worth 100x less than the amount they're sold for.

I'm just questioning why people do so much to please others when we really shouldn't need to.

 

[Tim Mazzola]

Take certain views to fit in with certain groups (literally everyone does this, even if you think you don't)

This is not only wrong but conceited and offensive. Just because you may do something doesn't mean everyone else does. I won't be hostile towards you for it, but don't try to justify yourself by claiming that it's something "everyone" does, because that excuse just doesn't work.

You can't tell me that you've never ever said or agreed with something for the express cause of trying to get on someone's good side.

I'd be willing to bet that everybody with the ability to communicate with others has done this before.

The reason is simple, we all want to be liked.

Don't try and tell me that I'm a part of a certain group who is specially flawed because of this, unless you're going to call that group the entire human race.

And also don't try and tell me that you're a part of a special group who doesn't and hasn't done this either.

It's like masturbation, everybody does it, but for some reason a massive amount of people have a huge problem admitting it.

Oh, sorry dude XD I misunderstood what you were talking about.

Yeah, I have SAID that I've liked certain things or had certain views in order to fit in. I'm quite ashamed of doing so, and stopped doing so when I was like 9, with maybe a few slip-ups here and there until I was like 14, but I can't say I've never done it. I thought you were saying everybody legitimately and actually changes their views and ideas solely for the purpose of fitting in, which would be false. I don't change who I am unless I have a damn good reason for doing so, and fitting in doesn't fall under that category.

 

[ChildishLegacy]

Buy new clothes frequently

Take certain views to fit in with certain groups (literally everyone does this, even if you think you don't)

Don't talk about certain things

I don't do the 1st and 3rd here, and try not to do the 2nd if you insist that everybody does this, but I like to think I'm my own person considering I'm a loner at heart. (even if it comes to having to stand my ground to apparent 'friends')

I agree with you though, it's pretty pathetic that people can't just be friends with each other for purposes such as conversation, and care about each others fashion sense/way of life. I hate having to impress or doing anything with people other than talking/pissing about.

 

[EightGaugeHippo]

I shower and change clothes daily, because if I don't, I smell.
Maybe it's just me, but personally I don't like the smell of stewing, festering underarm and crotch sweat.

(although funnily enough, I haven't change the pair of Jeans I've been wearing for 3 months now, because I like these jeans and I don't have any others.)

I got my Mohawk because I wanted one.
Not to fit in, I'm not a punk or non-conformist anything.

I don't really watch what I say around people.

I'd don't need to alter anything about myself in order to fit in with my group of friends.