Things you dont say or do at a funeral

[ForensicYOYO]

I just got back from having my grandmothers funeral and as crazy as it sounds the entire time my mind kept coming up with bad funeral jokes. For example: The owner of the funeral home was telling us how well renown there funeral home is, and I had to fight myself from saying, I guess people are just dieing to get in here. See! so not appropriate lol.

So tell me what else you should never say or do at a funeral.

EDIT: When I die I want to go out with a bang. So burn my ashes and put me in a fire work! LOL

 

[Sinspiration]

"Wow! You're all acting like he died!"

 

[Nouw]

Never laugh loudly. Never.

 

[Kevonovitch]

spoon the widow in the open casket.

"guess payback was killer, wheres my 5$?"

 

[Lust]

Never show up drunk........

 

[ForensicYOYO]

"Wow! You're all acting like he died!"

... Wait are you saying thats what you dont say? Or is there something else going on im missing?
EDIT: I get it lol. Just had a blond moment.

 

[ZeFrenchGhost]

Never act like the deceased is your ventriloquist dummy or if they want to talk about taxidermy.

 

[AroLombardi]

I don't need to be here. I'll be here again later tonight.

 

[khaimera]

Do not try and dance with the deceased or the priest

 

[The Salty Vulcan]

Never admit to having slept with the deceased...or that they were awesome in bed.

It doesn't end well.

 

[Berethond]

"Ba ba dum, dum, dum, another bites the dust..."

 

[ForensicYOYO]

Never admit to having slept with the deceased...or that they were awesome in bed.

It doesn't end well.

No. No it does not

 

[ForensicYOYO]

"Ba ba dum, dum, dum, another bites the dust..."

Lol nearly shit myself!

 

[kuyo]

what's with the old man smell?

 

[fluffybunny937]

Never tell the widow that they'll be reunited very soon.

This example, of course, requires the couple to have been religious

 

[The Salty Vulcan]

Never admit to having slept with the deceased...or that they were awesome in bed.

It doesn't end well.

No. No it does not

Yeah...Doesn't help that his wife overheard.

 

[Omikron009]

Performing or receiving oral sex at a funeral is probably frowned upon. Dead baby jokes are tasteless any time, but telling them at a child's funeral is definitely out.

 

[Mr. Omega]

Walk in, sniff and go "Jeez, what's that smell? Did something die in here?"

 

[Mr. Grey]

Never take the hat.

No matter how nice it may be or the fact it looks better on you. Leave it on the chest of the deceased.