Think I might be falling for my best friend.

[thirion1850]

You don't risk, you don't win. Go for it, but don't leap on her with "I love you's", that usually chases a girl away. Not that I'd know anything about that.

*cough*

 

[jaketaz]

You must never avoid doing something because of the possibility of it going badly. What if you never go for it? Then it is GUARANTEED to go badly, because you will wonder "what if?" for the rest of your life. I have been down that road, my friend, and I assure you it is a painful one. Go for it. If you are really best friends, she will understand.

 

[Hollock]

Sounds to me like you are in high school. I had the biggest crush on this girl since the first day I met her. We stayed good friends all through school. When it came time to graduate, we walked together and we confessed to each other.

Skip ahead 17 months. We've grown so apart, neither of us know who each other is. I'm sorry, but at this time in your life, you still have no idea who YOU are, let alone somebody you love. I'm not talking out of hurt, or because I'm jaded, but it's true. You are still too young to handle a serious relationship. If she just wants to take things slow and easy, then that's fine, but honestly, don't expect anything to come of it.

And if I'm completely wrong, then I'm sorry to have doubted how much you care for each other. If you expect a solid answer, then there is none. There never is with love, and there certainly never is with people. Just try your best, and if you always know who you are, then the people who really matter will always be with you.

honestly this is what I've always thought throughout high school(I'm a seinor now), and I've never done anything (save for the one thing I posted earlier and even then I was just throwing up my arms and saying "fuck it, might as well"), never dated anyone, done anything. But were you like this in high school, or did you find this out later on?

 

[Tdc2182]

Don't go all out with the "I LOVE YOU!" stuff straight away, that can freak a girl out if you come off too strong. Just casually ask her out on a date, like a movie or a dinner or something, and see where you go from there. Make sure you establish that it's a date though, and not just a friends day out. "So you wanna go out on a date next saturday?" Or something like that.


Just don't get all dramatic about it is the important thing.

Also good advice.

This honestly only ever works if the girl is madly in love with you. Tell her that you've had feelings for her a while now and want to get it off your chest. Be perfectly normal no matter what the outcome is.

 

[Dark Prophet]

There was a girl not my best friend but a good friend, after some time I developed some wierd feelings, that I thought were love, towards her. I told her that I loved her, she laughed at me and our paths parted. Almost a year later she calls me and wants to meet up with me for old times sake. We meet and she is all serious and I think shit she still remembers that "I love you" thing. Then she says that she has thought about what I said, I'm turning red and trying to turn it to a joke ask "You thought a whole year about it?" She replies "It was actually ten months and nine days ago when you said you love me." I just stand there speechless. She asks "Do you still love me." I don't know what to answer. She kisses me, we spent the most wonderful summer together.

 

[thevillageidiot13]

Seriously, just ask her out. It's clear that you want to.

Also, don't buy into that "jeopardizing friendship by asking her out" shit. I've seen friendships survive much worse than that, and, as long as you don't turn into an epic creeper (if) she turns you down, there's no reason the friendship shouldn't last as long as you're prepared to take rejection in a mature way and put it behind you. If she's a good friend, and you're not an idiot, then even if you get rejected, the two of you will be able to move past that.

Ultimately, though, I've learned, both from firsthand and secondhand experience, that the best and most stable relationships are ones with a strong foundation of friendship, which is what you have.

Good luck.

 

[Nouw]

Forget all that "don't want to ruin a good friendship" stuff. Trust me when I say this, you'll be even more torn up if you don't do anything and she starts dating someone else.

Oh god this! THIS!

Get her when you can! Now! And don't start out with an 'I love you' because it won't really work.

 

[Dragon609]

Okay, this same thing happened to me execpt the other way around, my best friend say that she loved me and I told her that I did not feel the same way. She is now the closest friend that I have ever had and if anything, what happened helped this happen. Always remember, it's better to regret something you've done than regret something you havn't.

And if you decide to do it and you get cold feet just look at some courage wolf, that's what I did when I asked a friend I knew for three years out.

 

[BlindMessiah94]

In before BonsaiK

OT: I'm assuming you are in high school based on the "drama class" sentence, but in all honesty you probably won't know who your real friends are let alone "best" friends until you graduate and relationships start being tested since you don't see each other every day. As far as your feelings go, if you never try you will never know. If she truly is a friend she won't hold it against you and you can still be friends after you tell her how you feel. That is my opinion, but I'm not exactly a ladies man.

 

[Spectre4802]

snip, slash, eviscerate

I was going to put something here, but I came across this guy's post.

Forget all that "don't want to ruin a good friendship" stuff. Trust me when I say this, you'll be even more torn up if you don't do anything and she starts dating someone else.

So, pretty much this.

If you don't do anything, you'll hate yourself for it. Even if it ruins everything, if you don't do it, that question of "what if" will haunt you forever.

In short: DO IIIIT *madly waves arms around*

 

[Doctor What]

You are still too young to handle a serious relationship. If she just wants to take things slow and easy, then that's fine, but honestly, don't expect anything to come of it.

No he isn't.
Love is love no matter what age you may have.
Just because you're 70 year old doesn't make you any more qualified to speak about love than someone who is 14.
It varies for all people so don't say such blantant cynical pessimistic cr*p that isn't true for a nickle.[/quote]

Taken out of context. He's young in the sense that he still doesn't know who he is. Only people who are completely comfortable in who they are will do good in a relationship. Juvenile people will never last. You can be 70 and juvenile, or 14 and juvenile.

 

[Velveteen]

First post. Signed up to say this.

Watch American Beauty with her right away. In the dark.

That's what to do.

 

[Zaik]

You're already friend zoned so give up or waste a lot of time and effort on nothing.

 

[OrokuSaki]

Well I'm probably like the worst authority on this subject, but trust me, ask her out. You're doing more damage to your relationship in NOT seeing where it goes then if you were to make a total ass out of yourself.
Just tell her that you think that she's amazing and that even if she rejects you that you just had to give it a shot for your own peace of mind.

 

[OrokuSaki]

You are still too young to handle a serious relationship. If she just wants to take things slow and easy, then that's fine, but honestly, don't expect anything to come of it.

No he isn't.
Love is love no matter what age you may have.
Just because you're 70 year old doesn't make you any more qualified to speak about love than someone who is 14.
It varies for all people so don't say such blantant cynical pessimistic cr*p that isn't true for a nickle.

Taken out of context. He's young in the sense that he still doesn't know who he is. Only people who are completely comfortable in who they are will do good in a relationship. Juvenile people will never last. You can be 70 and juvenile, or 14 and juvenile.

Disagreeeeeeeee!

You can't understand something as complicated as real human bonding until you've experienced it. And I will go on record stating that no 14 year old is mature enough and experienced enough to be able to enter a real relationship as one would in their 20's or something.

That doesn't mean that something could never come of a young relationship.

But until you've experienced the world how can you presume to understand it?

/metaphor

I disagree with your disagreement, being nerdy enough to have had only 2 girlfriends in highschool, I am a 20 year old man with LESS understanding of love then your average 14 year-old.

 

[adam352]

I was in this situation, and after a few rough months (ex boyfriend and rebound and such) it all worked out with her and I'm happier than ever. Trust me, the worst bit is not knowing, it's a great feeling knowing where everything stands so you can move on.

Hope that helps