Useless superpowers and Situations to use them

[Laser Priest]

The ability to grow and/or retract facial hair at will.

Situation: Need to hide from someone. They could have sworn you had a long, orange beard earlier. There's no way you shaved that quickly. Hmm. Must have been someone else then.

 

[ZombieGenesis]

To steal a joke from Russel Howard, the ability to make anyone orgasm by poking them.

Otherwise, the ability to stack chairs at ridiculous angles.
Useful situation; stuck at the bottom of a pit? Just happens to be a pile of folding chairs? But oh no! The hole is more like a slide and doesn't go straight up... no problem.

 

[Fitzie94]

The power to control lactose food items =D

I guess someone likes misfits ^-^

 

[La Barata]

The ability to make this sound at will.

http://people.rit.edu/~bss6378/instantCSI/

Usless? Yes.

Awesome in the right situations?


Hell yes.

You just like posting that link dont you?

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

He does.

 

[Scarim Coral]

How about having a rock skin like The Thing from the Fantastic Four however you part of your skin is rock like so you are still vulnerable.

As for a useful situation of be in a place of danger and when you would of got injury from it actually you were save from that patch of rock skin (e.g. a metal pole would of stab you in the chest but your chest can become a rock skin and thus the pole didn't pierce through it).

 

[Cold Blue]

another one: you can make an apple appear at any time...anywhere...
your enemy now has half of their brain space being taken up by a friggin' apple

 

[CheesyGrin1992]

The power to control lactose food items =D

I think Misfits proved just how useful and psychotically deadly a power like that can be

OT, the power to make inanimate objects speak. Because that could just be such a great distraction tool for getting out of all kinds of situations. Especially on drunk people. Drunk people bugging you too much. "Well, I would listen to your ramblings, but I believe your pint would like to have a word with you..."

 

[Erja_Perttu]

The power to control lactose food items =D

I guess someone likes misfits ^-^

The power to control lactose food items =D

I think Misfits proved just how useful and psychotically deadly a power like that can be

OT, the power to make inanimate objects speak. Because that could just be such a great distraction tool for getting out of all kinds of situations. Especially on drunk people. Drunk people bugging you too much. "Well, I would listen to your ramblings, but I believe your pint would like to have a word with you..."

Hey, do I sense a misfits fa-

Damn ninjas!

Well, guess I'll just go for the power to make people think they're falling down a big hole when I blink at them in a very specific way.

 

[PneumaticSuicide]

Every time you die, you go back to the last time you ate cheese.

I just pissed myself at work after reading this, best power ever!!!11

 

[Giest4life]

power
the ability to make people get you toast, whoever, wherever and whenever...
Situations to use them
getting out of an argument:
person:"If you dont clear your mess now i will..."
you:"make me toast"
person:"I will be right back"

Can't this be applied to virtually every situation involving a sentient being? It's an aweome power and you are far, far underestimating it.

Darth Vader: "... Together we will rule the universe as father and son"
Luke: "I'll never join you."
Darth Vader: "But Iam--"
Luke: "Get me toast."

See what I mean?

 

[PneumaticSuicide]

The mad powers to corrode elastic in clothing/underwear.

Eg. a thousand people lining up for tickets for a couple of days, finally everyone gets up to move 50 meters and BAM! everyone simultaneously drops dacks!

 

[StellarViking]

The ability to make a group of people act out a random scene from any Monty Python movie/episode, and not regain control until the scene is complete.

This would be useful in, say, a hold-up. As soon as the would-be criminal pulled out his gun, it would become a parrot and he would simply say "THIS PARROT IS NO MORE. IT HAS CEASED TO BE." Alternately, his only form of escape would be silly walks.

 

[AgentNein]

How about the ability to projectile vomit Alphabetty-Spaghetti?

Sounds bad right? WRONG.

I couldn't read past this point for a couple of minutes I was laughing so hard.

 

[.No.]

The power to turn people into bunnies. The only problem would be that they would be indestructible bunnies, which would actually be good at times though.