Victim of a failed mugging, looking for Options for learning self defense.

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Fieldy409_v1legacy

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Oct 9, 2008
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So my friend and I were walking in town at night after a mad night of dancing and drinking to celebrate new years, looking for a taxi to find our way home. When this guy goes up to us, asks us how we are going and then says we need to empty our wallets or hed call "The boys"

I looked around and said "Where are your boys?" He didnt answer me and I honestly dont think there were any. He was this skinny bloke who clearly didnt lift about half my size so I wasnt Now im a bit crazy when Im drunk, im not a drunken brawler or anything but I just never get intimidated.

Thats when he started to ignore me and start trying to intimidate my friend who was trying to talk him into walking away. He wasnt having any of that and pulled his hands out of his pockets revealing only clenched fists and he had put himself between my friend and I. So I figured Id have to grab the guy, Ive been taught a few things about using their head to control their body with grabs but its basic, I was more muscular though I dont look it as a big fat powerlifter but thinking about it now it could have gone south if this guy really knew how to fight.

Luckily a bloke stuck his head out of his apartment window and asked if we were right, I quickly yelled that the guy was trying to mug us and the mugger was off like a flash as the stranger threw abuse at him. We shouted up to him thanks and called him a legend and I intend to meet that guy later and give him a bottle of something expensive as a reward.

But without that stranger it could have been bad. Possibly not as the guy didnt seem like a challenge, but he could have hurt my friend and I dont want that to happen again.

So I want to learn to fight, next time somebody like that turns their back on me I want them to not know what hit them. What would be a good discipline for quickly putting somebody down on the street so I can walk away? I never want to see my friends threatened like that again.
 

Glongpre

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First, fighting should be a last resort, it is no picnic.

If you want to be able to defend yourself, then any martial art will do. Judo, Ju Jitsu, Muay Thai, Karate, Tae Kwon Do, Boxing. Whatever. But the biggest contributor to the victory will be your own determination. The will to act, if I may steal a line from Batman.

But seriously, don't try and fight people on the street, they might have a knife or something.

If you have to fight, then make sure it is absolutely necessary.
 

nariette

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It's not a great idea to initiate a fight indeed, the mugger could carry a weapon even though he's skinnier than you are.

It sounds cheesy but your attitude can help you a lot in these things. You can be really tall and muscular but if you look scared the risk of getting mugged is way bigger than if you are a short guy with an attitude of "you don't mess with me idiots". On the other hand, you can gain this confidence by learning martial arts. I'd recommend a defensive one, your goal is to defend, not to beat someone up. Jiu Jitsu will be too aggressive for that, but Taekwondo or Judo will probably be fine.

Growing up I was taught several things to really slow someone down when you are mugged (I think all girls are taught those things when they hit puberty though). A kick below the belt always does the trick when somebody is coming straight at you. Sticking your thumb in his eye is a lot more aggressive but also a lot more effective. If someone grabs you from behind, smash your head in his nose or twist his thumb. These are more offensive tactics though, here you can get prosecuted if you use excessive self-defence if the situation doesn't call for it and the mugger sues you.
 

Wyes

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I had this big long post which apparently just didn't want to turn up.

To make a long story short;

- Beware that martial arts can make you worse in a street situation, because you get too used to fighting in a systematic way, against people who do the same art. To this effect, probably best to avoid the popular, 'sportified' arts, like taekwondo and karate.

- Striking is not usually very relevant in a self-defense situation. Learn an art that has some focus on grappling, or one that does only grappling and supplement with boxing or kickboxing (because they're easy to pick up in about 6 months). This is arts like jujutsu (Japanese, not Brazilian, for reasons I'll mention below), judo, aikido, or just in general stand up wrestling arts.

- Don't learn a groundfighting art like Brazilian jujutsu. This art is very good one on one, but as soon as there's the potential for somebody to stomp on your head while you're wrestling with his mate on the ground, it loses its efficacy.

- Avoid pain-compliance techniques, they are not reliable.

- If anybody tells you that they can teach you how to defend yourself against weapons reliably, they're either lying or overstating their case. Even in a controlled situation, when doing knife defense, I can throw a simple overhead stab at somebody's temple and hit them six times out of ten, even when they know exactly what I'm going to do. I'm by no means an expert with weapons, either. If somebody has a weapon, you run (unless you're defending somebody else). This is especially true of knives - there is no safe way to knife fight, so it doesn't matter if you have your own knife.
 

Fieldy409_v1legacy

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See Ive been thinking about this some more. My original post was about 2 hours after the incident. We laugh about it now. The guy had no chance against us unarmed with his back to me and now I know my mate wasnt the slightest bit worried either im not upset at all because that was the main problem I had, my mate being threatened.

I still think this is a good idea because it could have been a bigger guy, multiple people or somebody who was armed and Id like to protect my more steryotypically nerdy friends and feel safe when we party. Ever since getting my licence Ive had a lot of free time that I was putting into learning how to drive, I could spend it playing videogames or I could use some of it to better myself.

Thing is though, before this incident I was thinking of getting into yoga with that time, something a bit spiritual and relaxing with lots of stretching as a counter to the 'hardcore' sorty of 'angry' stuff like weightlifting and crossfit I do. So now im thinking back to my old days in karate and yeah that was kinda like that. I think I remember us meditating and stuff like that? I was young.

But im thinking I am more built to grapple like the above mentioned, so maybe I should get into something with a more spiritual mind and body connection type of thing, Im sure theres plenty of that in martial arts.

Or I could say fuck that I guess and join the korean MMA club ive heard about lol.

edit: Oh and we ended up meeting that guy who helped us by knocking on the door and gave him a carton of boags Red beer to thank him, Apparently he had been watching out his window all night because of a party happening in one of his neighbours houses full of dodgy cunts lol. We were telling everyone when we told the story that the guy was black! He was white as you or me lol.
 

Batou667

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These "recommend me a martial art" threads sometimes devolve into people making impassioned and very inflated claims about the superiority of *their* style. I don't want to do that. But my tips are:

- Shop around. Never mind grappling vs striking, internal vs external, Crane style vs Tiger style or whatever, the best martial art you can learn is the one that works for you and is taught by an instructor who is skilled in teaching, not just fighting.

- Like somebody else said, some martial arts will put you at a disadvantage - either through an inflated and unrealistic belief in your own abilities (I've met certified black belts who couldn't punch their way out of a paper bag), or through choreographed drills where you're told that an attacker will be holding a knife like *this*, and you should block like *this*, then he'll allow you to disarm him by doing *this*, and then...

- Without wanting to get into a style vs style pissing match, bear in mind that many martial arts will be useless for realistic street and weapons defence scenarios, and "ground and pound" only works if you're fighting one-on-one. For street defence, maybe look to what bouncers and security staff do - striking and holds combined with lots of threat assessment/avoidance, assertiveness and communication skills. Being in good physical shape is always a plus too.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
 

Wyes

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MarsAtlas said:
I recommend the whole episode, btw, it goes through many good points, particularly about what constitutes as "self-defense", since a lot of people have a really funny idea of what that is. If you're willing to fight a person in the name of self defense, you had better be willing to outright kill them, because thats sometimes what self-defense necessitates. Buy a fucking gun. Get a CCW permit. Practice at the range. Don't use it unless you can't run, and your life absolutely depends on it.
Depending what country the OP is from, guns may not be an option. In countries such as the UK (okay, not 'a' country) and Australia CCW permits are for all intents and purposes impossible to get. Also, the effectiveness of guns for self-defense is over-stated.
There's a few really horrible videos out there of people getting stabbed because they tried to pull a gun on somebody with a knife - the rule of thumb is that if the person is closer than like 10-15 metres, then the gun isn't going to help you. One of the worst cases I've heard of was a ring of cops surrounding a guy with a knife, and they're all standing about 30 feet from the guy and he just runs up and stabs them one by one before they can draw their guns. Unfortunately I can't find the video at the moment, but I believe it was in South Africa. If I find it again I'll post it.
Guns can work for self-defense, but they're really situational. In most self-defense situations you're not going to have time to draw.

EDIT: There is one nasty example here [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75RTkGbiJpk] (be warned, graphic content ahead).

EDIT2: Definitely recommend the 'run' advice though. Usually the best thing you can do.
 

ecoho

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Fieldy409 said:
So my friend and I were walking in town at night after a mad night of dancing and drinking to celebrate new years, looking for a taxi to find our way home. When this guy goes up to us, asks us how we are going and then says we need to empty our wallets or hed call "The boys"

I looked around and said "Where are your boys?" He didnt answer me and I honestly dont think there were any. He was this skinny bloke who clearly didnt lift about half my size so I wasnt Now im a bit crazy when Im drunk, im not a drunken brawler or anything but I just never get intimidated.

Thats when he started to ignore me and start trying to intimidate my friend who was trying to talk him into walking away. He wasnt having any of that and pulled his hands out of his pockets revealing only clenched fists and he had put himself between my friend and I. So I figured Id have to grab the guy, Ive been taught a few things about using their head to control their body with grabs but its basic, I was more muscular though I dont look it as a big fat powerlifter but thinking about it now it could have gone south if this guy really knew how to fight.

Luckily a bloke stuck his head out of his apartment window and asked if we were right, I quickly yelled that the guy was trying to mug us and the mugger was off like a flash as the stranger threw abuse at him. We shouted up to him thanks and called him a legend and I intend to meet that guy later and give him a bottle of something expensive as a reward.

But without that stranger it could have been bad. Possibly not as the guy didnt seem like a challenge, but he could have hurt my friend and I dont want that to happen again.

So I want to learn to fight, next time somebody like that turns their back on me I want them to not know what hit them. What would be a good discipline for quickly putting somebody down on the street so I can walk away? I never want to see my friends threatened like that again.
contact your local police department they tend to hold self defense courses for everyone. all else fails remember groin, collar bone, throat, and eyes should always be your first target, there is no such thing as a fair fight only a winner and a loser.
 

Scolar Visari

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MarsAtlas said:
Best method of self-defense #3: A gun. Honest to goodness truth. There's a clip from a show, Penn and Teller's Bullshit, which puts it pretty aptly.

Do understand that the presence of a firearm is not a be all solution to defense. Hardware can never make up for lack of software.

Good honest training and proper planning will do more for you than simply carrying a weapon.
 

A.A.K

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Fieldy409 said:
Well, I only have 3 things to say.
1. Any martial art or fighting system will do if you're good enough.
If you strictly want self defense applications, pick kung fu (or another oriental art) and study it like a psychopath so you don't get killed, or pick a military art. Combatives, Krav Maga, Systema, McMap, doesn't matter. They're all the same as far as I'm concerned. "How to maim people asap."
2. You're not gonna become some hectic fighter any time soon. Don't do a month of classes and expect to beat up street thugs.
Huge misconception that they're all untrained goons. True many are shit fighters, but they still more 'fighter' than you're average man :p and it's not uncommon now to do a little bit of boxing, muay thai, mma, whatever. So they at least punch straight.
3. Size doesn't matter. It affects reach, but if you're sadistic or trained enough, size doesn't determine victory.
Not just "what if he's palming a blade?" but "You're 15kg's heavier than me, overconfident and I'm gonna dedicate myself to crushing your calves/knees. Then you're going to eat my knee until you're blind or out of teeth."
 

A.A.K

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MarsAtlas said:
Scolar Visari said:
MarsAtlas said:
Best method of self-defense #3: A gun. Honest to goodness truth. There's a clip from a show, Penn and Teller's Bullshit, which puts it pretty aptly.

Do understand that the presence of a firearm is not a be all solution to defense. Hardware can never make up for lack of software.

Good honest training and proper planning will do more for you than simply carrying a weapon.
I understand, but there's a lot of reasons why guns are preferred to hands and feet.

1. Less time sink into the skill. A lot of people learn self-defense techniques right after they're assaulted and an attempt to assault them is made.

2. Less cost. Buying a gun is often cheaper. For example, this[footnote]http://www.sigsauer.com/CatalogProductDetails/p290rs.aspx[/footnote] is six rounds, 9mm, compact, reliable, and less than $600. Any other training class I've been made aware of would exceed that in less than twelve months.

3. Age and able-body restrictions. Lots of people are either too old, or otherwise unable to realistically fight with their arms and legs, whether they have some sort of handicap, be regnant, etc. My grandfather carries a concealed firearm because he's just too slow and vulnerable. The only area he isn't slow in is when he draws his weapon.

4. If you're willing to use lethal force in self-defense, you're better off using a damn gun to achieve those means. Its not something I advocate, I'm just being realistic, because as long as you're mindful of when to use it (when option #1 and #2 fail), you put yourself at less personal risk.

5. Its not the be-all, end-all defense. Avoiding conflict and running away from conflict is. There's a reason its my #3. I've been jumped a lot, been in a ton of fights, but out of dozens and dozens of conflicts, there was only ever one where a weapon would've been suitable, and that was when a pistol was at my temple. Being smart and bouncing are the best ways to protect yourself, period, I never said anything otherwise.
You're both right.
Pistols are fantastic, but fall into the same category as bladed weapons for self defense.
Most knife injuries are caused by the dude who brought them. I would teach people "Carry a knife, sure, but you need to be skilled enough not to lose it and you need to be mentally ready, able, and willing to kill with it - and by extension die. If not? A knife is just a liability."
Pistols are the same, if you're ready to draw, you better be ready and able to pull the trigger.
You do need some sort of hand to hand training though, if you get disarmed - the other person isn't going to forget that you DID just pull a gun on him/her.

Last August I had someone sick an angry russian kid with a bowie knife (He was 20; I'm just insulting him) on me. I had 6 stitches (one of them internal - to hold the other 5 together) on my right forearm and a "shaving cut" on my face that went from my eye to my jaw and took 2 months to heal without a scar. Then spent 3 weeks in and out of police stations. I survived due to...my training and my EDC that I don't go anywhere without.
 

Fieldy409_v1legacy

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No guns or knives for me thanks. I live in Australia and guns are out of the question and any knife I bring could just end up lodged in my guts.

I've discovered there's a Brazilian Jujitsu and mixed martial arts class going on at my gym. I get a discount there because of the membership I already have and the classes are nicely placed so that I can go straight from that to weightlifting with my workout buddie without worrying about changing his schedule for spotting him and vice versa(Whether I can manage that workload will depend on the intensity of the class I guess)

I assume conditioning is a big part of martial arts classes?