What are the weirdest song lyrics you've ever heard?

[BrownGaijin]

Does Revolution 9 from the Beatles count?


Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine, number...
...Then there's this Welsh Rarebit wearing some brown underpants
...About the stortage of grain in Hertfordshire
Everyone of them knew that as time went by they'd
Get a little bit older and a little bit slower but...
It's all the same thing, in this case manufactured by
Someone who's always umpteen (...)
Your father's giving it diddly-i-dee district was leaving...
Intended to die (...) Ottoman...
(...)...Long gone through...(...)
I've got to say irritably and...
(...) Floors, hard enough to put on (...) Per day's md in our district
There was not really enough light to get down,
And ultimately (...) Slumped down
Suddenly...
They may stop the funding...
Place your bets
The original
Afraid she'll die (...)
Great colours for the season
Number nine, number nine
Who's to know?
Who was to know?
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
I sustained nothing worse than (...)
Also, for example
Whatever you're doing
A business deal falls through
I informed him on the third night, when fortune gives...
Be alright, be alright
Right, right, right, right
Right
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Ri-i-i-i-ight
Ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ight
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
(...) I've missed all of that
It makes me a few day's late
Compared with, like, wow!
And wierd stuff like that...
(...) Taking our sides sometimes
(...) Floral bark
Rouge doctors have brought this specimen
I have nobody's short-cuts, aha...
Nine, number nine
(...) With the situation
They are standing still
The plan, the telegram...
(Hubbbbba, hubbbbba, hubbbbbba, hubbbbba, hubbbbba
Number nine, number Hubbba)
A man without terrors from beard to false
As the headmaster reported to my son
He really can try, as they do, to find function...
Tell what he was saying, and his voice was low and his hive high,
And his eyes were low...
Alright!
It was on fire and his glasses were the same
This thing know if it was tinted,
But you know it isn't
To me it is...
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine, number nine
So the wife called me and we'd better go to see a surgeon
to price it (...) Yellow underclothes
So, any road, we went to see a dentist instead
That gave her a pair of teeth which wasn't any good at all
So I said I'd marry, join the fucking navy and went to sea
Block that kick, block that kick
In my broken chair, my wings are broken and so is my hair
I'm not in the mood for whirling
How?
Dogs for dogging, hands for clapping
Bird's for birding, and fish for fishing
Them for themming and when for whemming
...Only to find the night-watchman
Unaware of his presence in the building
Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine
Number nine, number nine
Industry allows financial imbalance
Thrusting it bewteen his shoulder blades
The watusi, the twist
Eldorado
Take this, brother, may it serve you well
Maybe it's nothing
What, what oh...
Maybe, even then, impervious in London
...Could be difficult thing...
It's quick like rush for peace because it's so much
Like being naked
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright
It's alright
If, you've become naked
Block that kick, block that kick, block that kick, block that kick
Block that kick, block that kick, block that kick, block that kick
Block that kick, block that kick, block that kick, block that kick
Block that kick, block that kick, block that kick, block that nixon

 

[socialtangent]

The dark dark Sunday, the blood stains
You can't save yourself
The dark dark Sunday, the blood stains
ONE DAY I WILL FUCK YOUR PARENTS

- Clever Sleazoid by Dir en Grey

 

[Hollock]

I can see through mountains watch me disappear
I can even touch the sky
Swallowing colors of the sound I hear
Am I just a crazy guy? You bet

 

[Pegghead]

YELLOW MATTER CUSTARD DRIPPING FROM A DEAD DOGS EYE!

 

[RanD00M]

<spoiler=One fucked up song.Coming up>We are your sex toys
Plastic cunts and rubber dongs
Helping your imagination to grow nice and strong
Give you a ticket to the possibilities
Cuz society would rather you hide your fantasies
We are your sex toys
We listen and respond
We?re here to teach you that creative sex is not wrong
We will tell you all about yourself
Extremely personal and deeply intimate
Sometimes moving, sometimes surprising,
always fascinating, you should listen
We are without bias or judgment
Learn, explore, connect, and grow
Don?t compromise your passion
Don?t deny what turns you on
Pumps and dildos, vibes and lubricants,
condoms, buttplugs and blindfolds,
anal beads, cockrings, and paddles,
nipple clamps, and adult videos
We are your sex toys
The keys to your repressive cage
Crossing boundaries of race, gender, class and age
We can help you learn all about yourself
Extremely personal and deeply intimate
Sometimes moving, sometimes surprising,
always fascinating, you should listen
We are your sex toys
The ridiculed and despised
So ignore any feeling down between your thighs
You?ve been trained to feel ashamed
It must remain decent above all the same
Sex for pleasure, not just birth
Science and religion try to deny its worth.
Sex for pleasure, not just birth
Science and religion try to deny its worth.
We are your sex toys
The ridiculed and despised
So ignore any feeling down between your thighs
You?ve been trained to feel ashamed
It must remain decent above all the same
Sex for pleasure, not just birth
Science and religion try to deny its worth.
Sex for pleasure, not just birth
Science and religion try to deny its worth.

 

[Wadders]

Dude! Clutch are awesome. I dont think they've written a single song that didnt have weird lyrics

Quoted for truth on both statements. Sir, you have just been double-QFT'd.

Woop!

*does a dance*

I just thought of another one too. I Got Erection by Turbonegro, covered by Satyricon:

Spoiler

ARGHHHHH

Everytime I walk down the street - Erection
When I see a woman that I'd like to beat - Erection
When I think of blood I think of love - Erection
When I think of blood I think of love - Erection

Oh, I got Erection
Oh, I got Erection
Oh, I got Erection
Oh, I got Erection

When I set a house on fire - Erection
Once a liver, now she's a dier - Erection
When I dig a hole in the ground - Erection
When I hear that death punk sound- Erection

Oh, I got Erection
Oh, I got Erection
Oh, I got Erection
Oh, I got Erection

Dude! Clutch are awesome. I dont think they've written a single song that didnt have weird lyrics

Quoted for truth on both statements. Sir, you have just been double-QFT'd.

Yay! Another Clutch fan!

*points at username*

I found another one on here somewhere too. That makes 4 of us! A veritable hoard of Clutch fans

 

[Ignignoct]

"I'll battle any sex or any race--
You beatin' me is like Billy Crystal playin' Scarface,
I can't see it,
Blind through da eyes,
I came up in your face--
OOPS-POW-SURPRISE!!!

OHHHHH!!! [edit: Expletive-- deleted]!

I'm dope, [edit: impoverished urban black man], I'm dope!"

Dave Chappelle mocking a random extra in a skit. Season 2.

 

[dietpeachsnapple]

A recent song...

"shush girl,
Shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller,
And talk with your hips."

...

-.-

She want's to touch me (Woah)
She'll never leave me (Woah)
Woah-oh-oh xD
OT: Chop Suey! has random lyrics. It's like they just found a random word generator, and used it to write the song. I mean, it's not even about the food... it's just random xD

*shakes his head*

I maintain that when I am trying to get rid of a boner, Hellen Keller is what I think about.

Horrible song lyrics...

(And my dorm mates don't mind rubbing it in.)

That song is ass. Super ass.

Ass has variable definitions, among which is the foul stench of unhygienic bodies.