What do you really know about Australia?
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Well, I read something along those lines.LetoTheTyrant said:
I read it a year or two ago, and the book was a little out of date, so I really can't say.
It's just what I remember.
Here's some stuff any would-be visitors should know-
*In the various suburbs around the city, racism and homophobia are basically the status quo- in fact, I believe it could be mapped on a chart, the proximity to Major City vs dickishness of local populace.
*On that note, try not to stay in the suburbs, and don't try staying in a place remote enough to receive no signals- you will be mobbed by insects and you will cry. Again, can be mapped on proximity to city.
*It's apparently Australia day today. I did not know that.
*We aren't all painfully idiotic- though most of the smart ones are willing enough to play the fool, so we can make fun of ignorant tourists. I am OK with this.
Finally:
*Don't come here- New Zealand is prettier, with a friendlier population, and it has Wellington. You know what Wellington has? Cuba Mall.
*In the various suburbs around the city, racism and homophobia are basically the status quo- in fact, I believe it could be mapped on a chart, the proximity to Major City vs dickishness of local populace.
*On that note, try not to stay in the suburbs, and don't try staying in a place remote enough to receive no signals- you will be mobbed by insects and you will cry. Again, can be mapped on proximity to city.
*It's apparently Australia day today. I did not know that.
*We aren't all painfully idiotic- though most of the smart ones are willing enough to play the fool, so we can make fun of ignorant tourists. I am OK with this.
Finally:
*Don't come here- New Zealand is prettier, with a friendlier population, and it has Wellington. You know what Wellington has? Cuba Mall.
Two words: Vegemite Sandwich.
In all seriousness though, I obviously know a bit more than that... but I'm too lazy to write stuff out
In all seriousness though, I obviously know a bit more than that... but I'm too lazy to write stuff out
Did you just pull a Dylan Moran? I think you did!Lexodus said:And the sea is inhabited almost exclusively by things designed to kill you; sharks, jellyfish, swimming knives, they're all in there.brainless_fps_player said:
Well i live in Australia and it's ok, i guess. Way too hot though.
You might also need to know the nearest location of a padded room with enough rape whistles and printed articles from Cracked to sustain you because you are clearly a misinformed baby...want a nice bottle baby? In all seriousness when it comes to dangerous animals they're mostly out in the bush (and despite countless hikes and camps through bushland I've never seen anything more threatening than the odd blue-tongue or fly, and I've seen more of the harmless buggers in my backyard) and things which Cracked would have you believe (for humour) breed like rabbits and hunt us coast-huggers like funnel-webs and blue-ringed octopuses are fairly uncommon, you're probably only going to get injured severely if you're deaf to the odd shark alarm, blind to the animals minding their own damned business or too slow to ring 000 and get some anti-venom if you do get bitten or stung, hell, the most dangerous creature I've ever had a brush with at the beach is a blue-bottle, just leaves you with a sting that dies down with salt-water.brainless_fps_player said:
As an Australian we're a good nation with a bad (undeserved) rep and an uninteresting history. When it comes to games I honestly think we're better as gamers than most of the world, nonono, that's better in the sense that we never ***** as much as you Yanks when we're paying around $100 for a new-release and you guys have the hide to moan when a new AAA title costs you a mere $60, not to mention playing online with an Aussie is a humourous time.
Edit: It sure is nice to see the amount of Australians saying nice things about this pla-oh wait, no...Aussie aussie aussie?
1. everyone has a healthy moustache (even the women)
2. failure to eat vegamite for every meal is punishable by law
3. boomerangs are used by the police in lieu of guns
4. dingos are a constant threat to infants and toddlers
5. P. Sherman lives at 42 Wallaby Way,Sidney
6. knifey-spooney is a national pastime
7. Foster's is Australian for beer
8. kangaroos are the regional heavyweight champions
9. crocodilesare effing everywhere
10. according to the government, all Australian gamers are serial rapists waiting to happen (and can be set off by the slightest drop of fake virtual blood)
u mad mate?
*trollface*
2. failure to eat vegamite for every meal is punishable by law
3. boomerangs are used by the police in lieu of guns
4. dingos are a constant threat to infants and toddlers
5. P. Sherman lives at 42 Wallaby Way,Sidney
6. knifey-spooney is a national pastime
7. Foster's is Australian for beer
8. kangaroos are the regional heavyweight champions
9. crocodilesare effing everywhere
10. according to the government, all Australian gamers are serial rapists waiting to happen (and can be set off by the slightest drop of fake virtual blood)
u mad mate?
*trollface*