What is the drunkest you have ever been?

[the abyss gazes also]

So, I had a friend that I used to work with in a high stress, low pay job finally get his chance to escape like I finally did. So what did everyone do for his final day? We went to a hole in the wall bar and set him off in such a way that he will never forget... except he might. He was slurring his words and didn't make it past 7 o'clock. (We walked him home, like three blocks from the bar so no worries about sending drunken folk on to the roads.)

So, my fellow escapists, What is the drunkest you have ever been?

Mine was at a friends bachelor party. Since we were all geeks and this wedding was in Chicago, we went to this bar that had a Xbox in the back and a bracelet for $25 dollars with unlimited well drinks. After a bit of this and that I found screw drivers made with pineapple infused vodka. (After that I was DONE.) While I didn't black out or puke I was sure glad that I was in a city with public transportation. I wasn't like wearing a lampshade on my head or anything but I did even have trouble walking to the train station and I knew I was loud, but I never felt like I was even ever considering getting into a car.

So yeah, I'm a boring drunk. I talk philosophy and economics.

 

[DarkishFriend]

I got so drunk that I spent 2 - 3 hours in the bathroom thinking that I could possibly die. I had 12 shots of whiskey with only a salad in my stomach. I was freezing cold to the touch but I felt incredibly hot, so I poured cold water on my face and that was worse. My friends draped a towel around me, and while attempting to eat bread and drink water I dropped a glass on my head and it broke. I slept in the bathroom that night.

 

[Rose and Thorn]

I can tell you the sickest I have ever been, I puked 37 times in one hour....

Though I blame pizza hut, not the whisky. For one, I wasn't even super drunk, I am drunk like that ALL the time. Secondly, I have a strong stomach and rarely get sick. Thirdly, after the ordeal was over, it was pizza hut I got a sick feeling everytime I thought about it, not whisky, shit I drank some whisky two days after the event.

Uhg, the next day after, my family and I went to an island and we took a ferry boat...worst boat ride ever.

Moral of the story, don't eat pizza hut and I have been drunk way to many times to recall the worst, just the most sick.

 

[wintercoat]

Not very. A medium bottle of Brandy, assorted wine coolers(bout 5), some rum and coke, and some shots of Schnapps barely got me buzzed, and that's the most I've ever drank in one go.

 

[FilipJPhry]

Had a bottle of tequila and another bottle of vodka in one night. I blacked out and my friend told me I was in 2 fights, took a shit in a sink, broke up with my girlfriend, and was throwing rocks at some hipster saying something like "It's a pokemon!" I woke up in a bathroom too.

 

[Wolfram23]

Hmm... let' see.

18th bday, went to bar with family (sisters and cousins mostly). Seeing as they're all older and with jobs, they just kept feeding me drink after shot after drink. I know at some point I was dancing with some older ladies, and then my sisters decided I had to leave. On the ride home (in a cab) I suddenly woke up and spewed all over myself, wrecking my hockey team jacket. Puked again before we got home (managed to pull over and puke out the door this time).

Got home, went straight for the shower since I felt gross and pukey. Got naked, got into shower, and sat down. Proceeded to let rip the biggest and loudest fart ever, which was amplified many times over by both the water under my ass and the fact that I was in a bath/shower so it was like a big horn.

Anyway, then I puked out my pizza dinner some more, in the shower, stood up, I guess I dried off or something. I know my mom was all "are you ok???" at the door. Oh and my sister's boyfriend was laughing his ass off at my mega fart... anyway, I made it to bed, and woke up with towels on my pillows, a bit of puke stains, and a killer hang over. Apparently I puked in my sleep and my mom thought I was dying.

I have another story.

New years. I was... 19 or 20. Probably 19. Went to cousin's girlfriend's big huge house party. I brought some Captain Morgans and proceeded to drink it with coke like it was nothing. Had plenty of fun, all that good stuff. I remember at midnight we went outside and I ended up with 2 roman candles, lit, in my hands which I shot wherever.

Anyway, around 2 am I guess the full on drunkeness hit so I went for the bathroom. I don't know exactly what happened, but I do know I ended up sitting on the toilet pooping and puking between my legs, and somewhat passing out but trying hard not to. The miracle is that apparently my puke was pretty well projected as I wasn't covered in it.

Terrible, terrible headache the next day.

I have another story.

I was at my cousin's house (same cousin) with my girlfriend of the time (she was 17) and I also brought a good friend of mine, since elementary. It was a poker game tourney and we brought a 26oz of rum. I suck at poker so I was out after however many rounds, but more importantly our rum was gone. So I've drank half a 26... and we get this brilliant idea that we need more! Obviously I was already trashed, but I got in a car with a friend who was sober (I hope) and we did a liquor run. FYI, liquor run was happening anyway, I just wanted to make sure I got my stuff.

Anyway, bought another 26... got my friend to pour our cups. Well after we finish 1 drink each I hand him back my cup for another. Maybe halfway through that I catch a glimpse of our bottle - it was empty. This crazy fuckin guy poured 1/4 of a 26 per cup! Teeth were already numb so it's not like I could taste it, so yeah, wow, drank a full 26 to myself basically.

Needless to say, puking occured. So did some other crap about getting my gf home on time (taxi didn't show up). I don't quite remember how we got home, but my friend apparently spent the night in the bathroom in a pool of his own puke. Oh and queue massive hang over.

So. Kids. Drink responsibly. When your teeth are numb, you are already too drunk - start chugging water!!!!

I honestly barely drink anymore, and when I do it's just a few beers. Haven't been good and drunk in probably 2 years. I'm 26, btw.

EDIT: I have another story.

Went to the bar with some friends. We pre drank vodka and 7up at my place. I think there was 3 or 4 or us guys. Anyway get to the bar, head upstairs and chill. I order a 7up and dump an entire flask into it. Drank it down pretty quick and... don't remember. Blacked out. Next thing I know It's like 1am and I'm in line at this bar called Wooly Bullies where I think I was supposed to meet people. Suddenly a bunch of guys spill out of the bar and have this big brawl on the street. I'm just like "DAFUQ!?", turn and walk away. I think I just hopped a cab home, never saw my friends, and no idea what happened most of the night. I vaguely remember walking down the ave with some other friends and stopping at a liquor store. And punching lamp posts. That's about it.

 

[Eddie the head]

I hate drunk people they think they are funny when they are not. Consequently I don't drink. Never have never will.

 

[Dirty Hipsters]

The drunkest I've ever been was probably when my friends and I drove to Vegas over spring break. I got on a real hot streak when I was playing Craps at the Wynn casino, so we were standing at the table for about 3 hours, during which time I consumed a rum and coke about ever 10-15 minutes. Then when we were walking back to our hotel we began to sober up in the night air, and it began to register how much our legs hurt from standing so much. We realized that the best way to deal with this was definitely more alcohol, so we stopped at this outdoor bar on the stripe, and all ordered the biggest drink they give you a, 3 foot tall drink that looks like this [http://a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/55/9f35d33b799a47a982275e2ab1e18125/l.jpg] (note, I am not the guy in that pic, that's just a size reference). We continued to drink those as we made our way back to the hotel, finishing them over the course of about another 45 minutes. The next day I experienced a pretty bad hangover.

 

[Rawne1980]

I got dentist chaired on my 21st and spent 2 days in a drunken coma in a hospital..

 

[Reginald]

Three quarters of a bottle of rum, on an empty stomach. Passed out for a little while, then woke up feeling like a million bucks, strangely enough.

 

[Aris Khandr]

Playing Dungeons and Dragons on a hot summer day. The DM brought in a serving tray filled with paper cups of water, about the size of a shot glass. He didn't bother to inform us that they were props for the game, so I downed two or three before we found out. They were supposed to be Dwarven Ale. My character at the time was a Half-Elf, so by all rights I should have probably been dead, but I got good rolls on my Con check, so I had to RP as drunk the entire game. I'm told I did very well, considering that I have never had so much as a drop of alcohol in my life.

 

[Alternative]

last saturday night actually at my best friends 18th party (in Australia where the legal age is 18)
started partying at 6:30 pm and ended it at 4 am, so much drinking ivolved it was crazy
things i remember from the night include

-having a gay guy ask me to slap him on the ass
-talking about music with a overly flirtacious older woman, while her boyfriend stared at us
-taking shots with my friends father
-waking up in the morning in my friends bed next to him and his girlfriend

the most drunk ive ever been.
crazy nights like this help make up for the fact that i rarly drink

 

[BathorysGraveland]

Well, the drunkest I've ever been was at the aftermath of a funeral, where I ended up spending most of the night throwing up in the toilet. Now that I think about it, it was the only time I've ever been completely intoxicated. It was enough to drive me from drinking alcohol ever again xD

 

[Eddie the head]

I hate drunk people they think they are funny when they are not. Consequently I don't drink. Never have never will.

what a great story for a "drunkest you've ever been" thread :/
just because you dont drink doesnt mean you have to go round being a morally uptight twat

Well that was a little passive aggressive. Not sure how that was "morally uptight" morals don't have anything to do with why I don't drink, so I have no idea what you mean. If you want to drink fine but I don't like to, and don't expect me to hang around if there are a bunch of drunk people.

 

[Radoh]

Round about a half a bottle of Vodka and a shot of Whiskey. So drunk that I don't remember any of the conversation I had except for the bits I was told about the next morning, and that I apparently lost balance on a dime and kept falling out of my chair (Skype call).

Still didn't get a hangover though, just got very skittish, I don't get hangovers.
How do you like them apples? Sour, aren't they?

 

[elvor0]

ugh, family wedding, first taste of a free bar. Give me EVERYTHING! Even the things I don't like! Beer, Cider, Vodka, Whiskey, Jagermister, Red Wine, White Wine, and Champaign do not a good combo make. Violently, violently sick for a good few hours. Although saying that, I can pretty much just shrug off being sick and continue drinking without feeling any impact, "blughhh! yeah over now, on with the drinking!", purely because nothing will ever compare to how sick I was that night.

Captcha: Kiss me. Yeah I don't think so after that.

I hate drunk people they think they are funny when they are not. Consequently I don't drink. Never have never will.

I hate people who don't drink, who come into a thread about getting drunk purely to state that they hate drunk people. Maybe you should loosen up a little.

 

[Evil the White]

Friend's 18th party and we went out clubbing to celebrate. The drinks were very cheap, so I was able to get a lot more booze for my money. Spent the entire night drinking vodka, had many cases of talking to strangers thinking they were with us, cried a lot, ate pizza with mayo and shared a bed with a gay friend (resulting in many future jokes). No hangover though, so I was clearly doing something right.

 

[Sansha]

The one and only time I've been truly drunk, I just had fun. I got friendly and flirty. I had like seven cocktails and a Long Island Iced Tea.

The one negative thing I THINK I did was, before I started drinking I complimented a lady I liked on her gorgeous red dress.

After some drinks, I might have - don't remember - said "Your tits look great in that frock."

Good times.