What is the pettiest reason you wouldn't go out with someone or cause you to break up with someone?
- Thread starter Paragon Fury
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Though I would never make friends via the same standards, I guess that I'd end pursuing a romantic relationship if she exhibited traits I hold as masculine, or at least more masculine than myself. Just don't find it attractive. But, I can openly acknowledge that, since the definition of masculine can be personal as well as fickle, my reasoning could be quite petty.
I never really shied away from going on a date with someone as long as there was some sort of initial attraction. People can really surprise you if you just give them a chance.
I don't feel like I have a petty reason not to date someone. Almost all of them dealt with ways we just didn't seem to work together which sounds like the exact reason to not continue the relationship or not start the relationship. Like witnessing the person be a total asshole/***** to someone else who wasn't deserving of it. I guess the closest thing would be an utter lack of attraction to a person, but that usually includes their personality being iffy since personality plays such a large role in my attraction-scale.
I do have a friend who recently told us he would not date a girl with curly hair though (the tightly curled perm-like hairdo). We gave him a good ribbing on that one and he still wouldn't budge. I found that so remarkable since he is really interested in dating girls but lacks so much confidence that we've had to set him up on dates with likewise meek girls and even then he's too nervous to present himself well with girls. I simply don't understand.
I don't feel like I have a petty reason not to date someone. Almost all of them dealt with ways we just didn't seem to work together which sounds like the exact reason to not continue the relationship or not start the relationship. Like witnessing the person be a total asshole/***** to someone else who wasn't deserving of it. I guess the closest thing would be an utter lack of attraction to a person, but that usually includes their personality being iffy since personality plays such a large role in my attraction-scale.
I do have a friend who recently told us he would not date a girl with curly hair though (the tightly curled perm-like hairdo). We gave him a good ribbing on that one and he still wouldn't budge. I found that so remarkable since he is really interested in dating girls but lacks so much confidence that we've had to set him up on dates with likewise meek girls and even then he's too nervous to present himself well with girls. I simply don't understand.
I went on a date with this girl I really liked in highschool. I mean man she was hot, and she was apparently really into me as well. We went to go see Pulp Fiction when it came out in theaters, and I was blown away with how awesome the movie was. Once the credits rolled, I looked over at her, eager to discuss the movie. She said "...I don't get it." I realized that she and I just weren't going to have anything in common, and didn't date her again. Not really sure if that's "petty", or just realizing we didn't have anything in common other than sexual attraction.
Another girl, who was really into me, though I wasn't really into her. It was pretty well known that she had a crush on me, but at one point, another girl told me that she had built a little "shrine" to me, after getting hold of a photo booth set of photos with me (I bumped into her and a mutual friend at the mall, and they asked me to join them in the booth for those quick photos you can take with friends.) After hearing about this "shrine" I asked our mutual friend, who was also in the photo. She had a look of "oh shit, how did he find out?" and then proceeded to plead the 5th "I can neither confirm nor deny that information". So I didn't ever go out with her. Wasn't really planning on it anyway really, but it was a "maybe" kind of thing.
Another girl, who was really into me, though I wasn't really into her. It was pretty well known that she had a crush on me, but at one point, another girl told me that she had built a little "shrine" to me, after getting hold of a photo booth set of photos with me (I bumped into her and a mutual friend at the mall, and they asked me to join them in the booth for those quick photos you can take with friends.) After hearing about this "shrine" I asked our mutual friend, who was also in the photo. She had a look of "oh shit, how did he find out?" and then proceeded to plead the 5th "I can neither confirm nor deny that information". So I didn't ever go out with her. Wasn't really planning on it anyway really, but it was a "maybe" kind of thing.
Someone who's out of shape.
I'm no Mr. Universe, but I like to stay active (martial arts, parkour, bicycling, etc). And I simply can't be around a girl who doesn't.
One time I met a girl on a dating website and her picture and profile were just stunning. We talked on the phone and hit it off. But when we met in person she had...shall we say..."let herself go". Add to that, she said she became "anti-exercise" because she was tired of staying fit for other people. She also didn't care about their opinions on her appearance or physique.
That was an instant "nope". One, I like to stay in shape for myself. I feel better and I get to stave off all those health hazards that run in my family (high cholesterol, high blood pressure, etc...). Two, I like doing outdoorsy things on dates, so someone who's not into that wouldn't be a good fit for me.
And three...I'll admit it. I'm shallow.
I'm no Mr. Universe, but I like to stay active (martial arts, parkour, bicycling, etc). And I simply can't be around a girl who doesn't.
One time I met a girl on a dating website and her picture and profile were just stunning. We talked on the phone and hit it off. But when we met in person she had...shall we say..."let herself go". Add to that, she said she became "anti-exercise" because she was tired of staying fit for other people. She also didn't care about their opinions on her appearance or physique.
That was an instant "nope". One, I like to stay in shape for myself. I feel better and I get to stave off all those health hazards that run in my family (high cholesterol, high blood pressure, etc...). Two, I like doing outdoorsy things on dates, so someone who's not into that wouldn't be a good fit for me.
And three...I'll admit it. I'm shallow.
Whoo, this is an interesting one. My ex used to work out when she was younger, but she had pretty much dropped all exercise when we were dating. There was not a single part of her body that was firm, but she looked... ahem... shapely. Very.Zen Bard said:
I'm curious, would that also be a problem for you? I mean, not working out, but not having let yourself go entirely either. Being 'floppy', but looking great. I mean, is it just about the look, or is it taking a shared interest in athleticism?
I'm generally pretty open to anyone as long as they look human and don't stink (personality>looks) but I can't stand muscled bodies on women, at all. If they've got a 6 pack, I've got erectile dysfunction. Skinny or slightly toned is ok but I much prefer my women soft and squishy.
On the flip side, a girl I used to work with said she wouldn't date me because I bite my nails and it drove her crazy.
On the flip side, a girl I used to work with said she wouldn't date me because I bite my nails and it drove her crazy.
I really don't know. I guess, if I wasn't attracted to them or if they have values or morals that conflicted badly with mine (and I mean really badly).
Do you want actual reasons, or hypothetical reasons? I can give you actual reasons. Hypotheticals are boring and usually extreme.Paragon Fury said:
#3: She was a terrible kisser. Attractive, intelligent woman (lawyer, even) who was really into me, but she kissed like a dead fish. Literally just sat there with her mouth open.
#2: She had man hands, full Seinfeld style. Pretty girl, but big beefy man paws. Rough palms, too. Didn't stop me from sleeping with her (twice) which pretty much earned me my lifetime "asshole" badge, but hey...I was young, we all do stupid/selfish things when we're young.
#1: She was a type one diabetic, which resulted in incredibly poor circulation. She was very cold/clammy to the touch. Cold hands, cold skin, cold lips. SUPER sweet girl. Extremely kind, gentle and intelligent. We had a couple dates and I "it's not you, it's me'd" her. I'm a terrible person.
#3 is a bad one, no doubt, had 2 of those myself. Trained the first one and she became one of the best but the second one refused to learn so that was over within a couple of weeks.BloatedGuppy said:
#1....you're a monster.
I broke up with someone after less than a month because she was alot more energetic than I could handle. Does that count?
I really can't handle energetic people.
I really can't handle energetic people.
I just couldn't. It's one of my life's biggest regrets, too, that woman made a six figure salary.Street Halo said:
It was almost 20 years ago! I'm sorry!Street Halo said:
I've been in enough relationships to know that "similar energy levels" is almost as important as "similar values" or "similar interests" on the "essential compatibility" scale. Possibly even moreso. Put a low energy person with a high energy person who have everything else in common and they'll hate one another inside of a fortnight.Poetic Nova said:
Being straight. Look, I know some people just can't help themselves, but it's just such a deal-breaker for me. I'm not against straight people - my best friend is straight - but I just never could bring myself to date a straight guy. It'd just never work out.
...also, not cutting your fingernails regularly. God damn, I am way too anal about people having neat fingernails.
...also, not cutting your fingernails regularly. God damn, I am way too anal about people having neat fingernails.
THIS... I fucking hate it when people just try to talk to you and give you nothing to go on. They just text you 'hey,' then usually ask what you're up to. What do they usually reply? 'Nothing.' Seriously? Literally nothing? Nothing at ALL? I then have to imagine they're just sitting there staring at a wall and waiting on my responses. Suddenly, that means that talking to you is the only thing they're doing. It feels insanely needy.Chanticoblues said:
I'm all for having a conversation, but people who just text you one word initiations and responses aren't looking to have a conversation. They're just bored and feel it's your job to amuse them. I'll cut anyone out of my life who does this, dating or not. I even tell people that I don't like being texted just 'hey' and some people will still do it anyway. =/ Again... needy.
I should clarify that I don't find this to be petty at all, but others probably would.
What is the measurements for "petty?" Too many variables, so I will just narcissistically run off some deal breakers;
Intelligence is a must, cannot stand airheaded company...the conversations are dreary. But I don't mean IQ, I mean a more general understanding of the world, people, not loving and watching the kardashians and not being a complete idiot. Once, I strayed from this, it was a silly choice.
Holding any particularly ignorant views while not willing to try and understand things from a wider perspective. Is that petty? I don't know.
If they have no love for animals but adore human baby cubs. I find that type of mind worrying and distracting, attempting to understand it only brings shivers and nightmares. I am not a furry object!
Umm, I find great distaste (pardon the pun) in people that eat with tbeir mouth open noisily sloshing and smacking their lips. It does something weird to me, the sound seems to strongly trigger psychotic murdering sprees in my brain, illogically, like the well known fingers scraping down chalk boards reaction. Though this can easily be reasoned with a compromise reached by merely talking to them like a real person, so as long as it isn't a personal choice to continue, and if they are indeed real, then we may still be joyful friends. In fact, a previous partner did do it a while ago, but I felt too dickish to bring it up. Luckily it was only a rare occurrence for whatever reason, but it didn't stop that little cunty psycho mind within, screaming "whhhhyyyyyy???"
Cockney accents...though that isn't set in stone, it may change in the future, but currently they are abrasive against the ear judges. Also it is usually something that isn't only discovered mid-relationship unless you're into kidnapping your future partners.
There are probably more, the pickiness with personalities is a deep old well to mine.
Intelligence is a must, cannot stand airheaded company...the conversations are dreary. But I don't mean IQ, I mean a more general understanding of the world, people, not loving and watching the kardashians and not being a complete idiot. Once, I strayed from this, it was a silly choice.
Holding any particularly ignorant views while not willing to try and understand things from a wider perspective. Is that petty? I don't know.
If they have no love for animals but adore human baby cubs. I find that type of mind worrying and distracting, attempting to understand it only brings shivers and nightmares. I am not a furry object!
Umm, I find great distaste (pardon the pun) in people that eat with tbeir mouth open noisily sloshing and smacking their lips. It does something weird to me, the sound seems to strongly trigger psychotic murdering sprees in my brain, illogically, like the well known fingers scraping down chalk boards reaction. Though this can easily be reasoned with a compromise reached by merely talking to them like a real person, so as long as it isn't a personal choice to continue, and if they are indeed real, then we may still be joyful friends. In fact, a previous partner did do it a while ago, but I felt too dickish to bring it up. Luckily it was only a rare occurrence for whatever reason, but it didn't stop that little cunty psycho mind within, screaming "whhhhyyyyyy???"
Cockney accents...though that isn't set in stone, it may change in the future, but currently they are abrasive against the ear judges. Also it is usually something that isn't only discovered mid-relationship unless you're into kidnapping your future partners.
There are probably more, the pickiness with personalities is a deep old well to mine.