What is the weirdest thing a game has suggested you do?

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jamail77

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So, here I am rewatching the ending to the 2002 Spider-Man movie tie-in video game. And, it reminded me of something: Wow, this is 1 of the first games I played when I was a kid to tell me to do something completely against what I'm doing.

You want me to go outside? You don't want me to play more Activision published games? What is this outside you speak of? There are no games there! What is something a game has suggested you do that you found strange, whether it has to do with your real life by breaking the 4th wall or just something in-game?
 

Aeshi

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The "Offices" map in Killing Floor has a hilariously bad GPS/Pathfinder, and will commonly advise you to jump out the building because it'd get you to the ground floor quicker than the stairs.
 

Kopikatsu

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There was a mission in Borderlands 2 where Handsome Jack calls you and just asks you to kill yourself. And then you're given that objective. He even pays you for doing it.

Same game, a guy screams for you to shoot him in the face. And then you get a mission prompt to shoot him in the face.

One of the DLC has you mopping up Skag piss from rocks.

I think those are about tied.
 

jamail77

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Aeshi said:
The "Offices" map in Killing Floor has a hilariously bad GPS/Pathfinder, and will commonly advise you to jump out the building because it'd get you to the ground floor quicker than the stairs.
Sounds like what Apple Maps was like at launch. *Ba dum tss*

Kopikatsu said:
There was a mission in Borderlands 2 where Handsome Jack calls you and just asks you to kill yourself. And then you're given that objective. He even pays you for doing it.
So, wait. You can kill yourself, respawn, and then collect the money for doing it? What does Jack say to the respawned you because I'd be like "WTF is going on? You're dead. Dead things usually stay D.E.A.D."
 

Aeshi

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jamail77 said:
So, wait. You can kill yourself, respawn, and then collect the money for doing it? What does Jack say to the respawned you because I'd be like "WTF is going on? You're dead. Dead things usually stay D.E.A.D."
He knows how you respawn, he OWNS the Devices (the New-U's) that respawn you. He's basically just making you humiliate yourself for money.
 

jamail77

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Aeshi said:
He knows how you respawn, he OWNS the Devices (the New-U's) that respawn you. He's basically just making you humiliate yourself for money.
Oh. Honestly, of what little I know of that universe, sounds worth it if it gets you money so easily. It's a hellhole, isn't it? That's why pretty much everyone is a psychopath, right?
 

Bad Jim

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jamail77 said:
You want me to go outside? You don't want me to play more Activision published games? What is this outside you speak of?
When you finish The Secret of Monkey Island, you get told to turn your computer off and go to sleep. When you finish Monkey Island 2, you get a whole laundry list of things you could be doing instead of sitting at your computer playing.

http://youtu.be/_3yKyJI0U1c?t=2h38m55s
 

Kopikatsu

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jamail77 said:
Kopikatsu said:
There was a mission in Borderlands 2 where Handsome Jack calls you and just asks you to kill yourself. And then you're given that objective. He even pays you for doing it.
So, wait. You can kill yourself, respawn, and then collect the money for doing it? What does Jack say to the respawned you because I'd be like "WTF is going on? You're dead. Dead things usually stay D.E.A.D."
"Hahahahahaha... ah. I guess you just killed yourself. But uh, one second. No matter what happens... I just want you to remember one thing. You're a sellout. You killed yourself because I paid you to. You're my *****. Alright! Off you go."

If you choose to not kill yourself by calling the suicide hotline, the message is "Thank you for calling the Hyperion Suicide Prevention Hotline. Handsome Jack regrets to inform you that you are a coward." "Enjoy your nothing, you IDIOT!"
 

ExiledCreature

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Simon the Sorcerer 3D:

You get a CD in the game that you have to put into a computer. But that computer doesn't have a CD drive. To insert the CD, you need to open your physical CD drive (which is holding the CD you're currently playing on), then the virtual drive will open in the game.
 

lacktheknack

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Batman: Arkham Asylum got a good mindscrew in on me. At the scene where... ah, spoilers.

At the scene where Scarecrow gets you for a third time and you redo the opening scene with reversed roles, Joker shoots you in the face. The game over tip suggests that you dodge the bullet by tilting the controller (it's fake, of course).

Since I was on PC, if I remember right, the prompt told me to tilt my keyboard.

I triple-taked.

In Day of the Tentacle, there's a fourth-wall shattering moment where Laverne puts an ice cube with a hamster in it (I swear this makes sense) in a microwave to thaw it. The hamster barely survives. Laverne then turns to the player and says something to the effect of "So yeah, that thing I just did will get you taken away from your parents. PLEASE NEVER DO WHAT I JUST DID." Never before or since has a game told me to never copy it IRL.

Also, minor shout out to Portal 2's "Say Apple!" scene.
 

LaoJim

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Ignoring practically every puzzle in the Monkey Island games I'm going to go with

"Climb to the top of Wayne Tower as a female character riding a Gorrilla" from Lego Batman 2.
 

jamail77

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Bad Jim said:
When you finish The Secret of Monkey Island, you get told to turn your computer off and go to sleep. When you finish Monkey Island 2, you get a whole laundry list of things you could be doing instead of sitting at your computer playing.

http://youtu.be/_3yKyJI0U1c?t=2h38m55s
Wow, they took the time to write all of that. Also, "Or talk to a member of the opposite sex". Really, Monkey Island 2? Really? That's so insulting, but so lovably so. All the more reason I'm glad I put that series on my wishlist.

Kopikatsu said:
"Hahahahahaha... ah. I guess you just killed yourself. But uh, one second. No matter what happens... I just want you to remember one thing. You're a sellout. You killed yourself because I paid you to. You're my *****. Alright! Off you go."

If you choose to not kill yourself by calling the suicide hotline, the message is "Thank you for calling the Hyperion Suicide Prevention Hotline. Handsome Jack regrets to inform you that you are a coward." "Enjoy your nothing, you IDIOT!"
So, basically no matter what you do you're pathetic. I kind of like that actually. Games usually give you a power fantasy; here's a scenario in which you're humiliated. I might have to get that game.

ExiledCreature said:
This is your first post and I got too many quotes so I'm snipping you
If you do that though won't the game stop working? That tends to happen when you open the CD drive unless you're putting in a second disk related to the game. It sounds like an older game too, so how would it prevent that?

Rezalon said:
Why you little! I didn't see that coming in this thread! You know how long it has been since I lost that?!?!! All I can do to get back at you is snip your quote. Grrr.

lacktheknack said:
Batman: Arkham Asylum got a good mindscrew in on me. At the scene where... ah, spoilers.
Yeah, I like how they did that. However, I thought the
"static"
was overdoing it. It made a lot of people think their game crashed and frankly, took me out of the experience. I never thought my game crashed though. Games don't crash like that anymore AND I had the patience to wait it out to see what happens whereas everyone else freaked out and turned off their console/PC in 3 seconds. I could not help wondering how people could think that let alone give it no time to recover at all. I have to assume my Computer Science background gives me some sort of advantage.

lacktheknack said:
Laverne then turns to the player and says something to the effect of "So yeah, that thing I just did will get you taken away from your parents. PLEASE NEVER DO WHAT I JUST DID." Never before or since has a game told me to never copy it IRL.
Annnnnnd, there's a reason that game is also on my wishlist :D
 

DementedSheep

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Guild wars 2 has such riveting quests as:
catch frogs, put then thu a juicer and then take the vials of frog juice and throw them at poachers.
Disguise yourself as cow in order to teach other cows tricks.
Protect an experiential cattlepult (a cow firing catapult) and you can bet on where each cow will land.
Save chickens from the chikenado (a tornado that has picked up a bunch of chickens).
 

Pyrian

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In Far Cry 2, you're sick with malaria, and given an unskippable quest to destroy the malaria medicine kiln for a few diamonds. Uh... No thanks? But if you refuse, you can wander the sandbox all you like, but the game simply doesn't continue.
And if you do it, your condition deteriorates until you're dying.
 

Sniper Team 4

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lacktheknack said:
Batman: Arkham Asylum got a good mindscrew in on me. At the scene where... ah, spoilers.

At the scene where Scarecrow gets you for a third time and you redo the opening scene with reversed roles, Joker shoots you in the face. The game over tip suggests that you dodge the bullet by tilting the controller (it's fake, of course).

Since I was on PC, if I remember right, the prompt told me to tilt my keyboard.

I triple-taked.

In Day of the Tentacle, there's a fourth-wall shattering moment where Laverne puts an ice cube with a hamster in it (I swear this makes sense) in a microwave to thaw it. The hamster barely survives. Laverne then turns to the player and says something to the effect of "So yeah, that thing I just did will get you taken away from your parents. PLEASE NEVER DO WHAT I JUST DID." Never before or since has a game told me to never copy it IRL.

Also, minor shout out to Portal 2's "Say Apple!" scene.
Argh, you beat me to it! On the PS3 is says "Use the middle stick to dodge bullets." When it happened to my brother he looked at me like he was losing his mind because he had no idea what that meant. I just chuckled and told him to hit continue.

Metal Gear Solid. There are a lot of moments, but when you finally get that call during the Mantis fight that tells you how to beat him. "Wait...what? That's a joke, right? You can't really mean...oh. I guess you do."
 

Signa

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Having Phantom Hourglass tell me to close my DS probably was the dumbest thing I've been told to do by a game.
 

Moonmover

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During the tutorial for "Zoo Tycoon," the game tells you how to delete objects and then tells you to delete part of the fence surrounding your lion exhibit. When you do, the lion steps out and starts chasing your guests. The game then reprimands you, asking "Do you always do everything people tell you?" Then it helpfully highlights the "undo action " button.