What Should I/What would you do in this situation? (Winter related)

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tj236

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Oct 6, 2010
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My area got hit with a rather large winter storm last night and when I got home today, the driveway needed to be shovelled.

A little background before I get to the issue. I have a townhome and my driveway is shared with my neighbour. He is about 65-70 and lives with his wife. I have only been living here for a year, so this is the first winter I've lived next door to this person (also my first year with a shared driveway). It has snowed about four times this winter, and I have shovelled the entire driveway (both sides) every single one of those four times. I do it to be nice, and also because it's easier than just doing half (going back and forth). I rarely ever talk to this neighbour, and he always looks like a grumpy asshole whenever I see him. Regardless, I still do it.

Today, I arrived home to find his half of the driveway shovelled. Instantly, my mind starts thinking horrible things. I have nothing but contempt for this dick for about 5 minutes. Afterwards, I justify the situation, telling myself "He's old. I wont hold it against him".

So, I shovel the driveway (which took about 30 minutes) and clear away the excess left by the plow on both sides. Then I put salt down. It's the first snow fall where I think it was necessary to put salt down, so I did. BUT, earlier contempt creeps into my head and I only salt MY half. I didn't feel the need to do that for this guy, because that process doesn't require a lot of physical effort. And let him buy his own damn salt.

I go inside and about 20 minutes later I catch a glimpse of him through my front window, with a broom in his hand. This cheap bastard is sweeping the salt I put down to cover his half of the driveway.

After that, nothing but rage. How incredibly petty and cheap can you be? This happened about 30 minutes ago, and I am still upset about this.

What should I do? Confront him? Do something spiteful? Buy a giant 4x4 so I never have to shovel again?
 

Broady Brio

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Jun 28, 2009
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He expects you to shovel his snow and salt his drive?

Fuck. That. It wouldn't be so bad if he, you know? Asked.

I really don't know, maybe if possible (Probably not) walk to your workplace?
 

Mekado

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Mar 20, 2009
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Next time you see him out with a broom a "excuse me, what are you doing?" will start the conversation.Try to justify "stealing" salt now hehe...

He seems like a pretty egoistical asshole.
 

Chappy

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May 17, 2010
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He will probably deny it, if your going to confront him try to get proof to counter the age old arguement of 'why don't you prove it'.

Alternatively being me I'd be overcomplicated and instead of salt use sugar for a day to mindscrew him in the morning.

Is there per chance a time when he will not be awake or at home when you can salt the drive way without him noticing? I would suggest it better not to start a confrontation as if he manages to make you seem aggresive towards him it could affect how the rest of your neighbours interact with you.
 

zfactor

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Jan 16, 2010
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Well, I would have salted his driveway to begin with, thus avoiding rage.

You didn't salt his driveway because he didn't shovel yours? He's 70 years old, he only had the stamina to shovel one driveway (my grandfather would cut his grass in about 4 intervals, stopping to rest every half hour or so). Maybe he was going in for a break when you came home. Maybe he was going to shovel your half, but you interrupted him. Maybe his grandsons came over and only shoveled his half.

If you salted both driveways, it would have showed you had no hard feelings (even though you didn't) about whatever occured that prevented him from shoveling your half (even if it was you neighbor's mind). He might have come over and thanked you. It could have been the start of a beautiful friendship.

So next time, be more forgiving. It's better in the long run.
 

BE4T

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Jan 8, 2011
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El Poncho said:
Pull him up for it.

He will keep doing it if you don't.
This. You need to talk to the guy about it, preferably WHILE he is doing it so he cannot just deny the whole thing.

Maybe try and work out some kind of deal with him? Compensation on his part for your physical labor and salt materials.
 

Infinatex

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May 19, 2009
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tj236 said:
Next time just shovel your snow onto his side of the driveway! That'll teach the old bastard a lesson.

Also what does the salt do?
 

burningdragoon

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Jul 27, 2009
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I say be the bigger person and just let it go and next time you out salt down put it on both halves. If you must confront him, just offer to do it next time and say something along the lines of "sorry for the misunderstanding". Seeing how you are neighbors, you should try to come to agreement/understanding with each other.
 

Hader

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Jul 7, 2010
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Confront him about it. Nicely though.

However, I wouldn't use salt in the first place. Not on my driveway. At least where I live, it's useless to waste money on salt when it's just going to be shitty snowy weather no matter what. It's just a little bit of ice too...nothing my 10 years of hockey experience can't help me handle.
 

Hero in a half shell

It's not easy being green
Dec 30, 2009
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He is your neighbour, and if he wanted to could easily make your life very hard, you may regret it later if you do annoy him. We have neighbours who refuse to let anyone park in front of their houses despite us living in a very narrow street with no parking facilities, one guy got his car keyed for parking there overnight. They are just spiteful so we ignore them, it makes life much easier than getting into a feud with them. I say let it slide, although shovelling snow is very annoying, especially if it has hard-packed ice. Just be nice, even go the extra mile so he has nothing to be annoyed about. In the long run it will pay off.
 

Dags90

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Oct 27, 2009
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XinfiniteX said:
Wow I never knew that. Probably because I have never even seen snow!
To be pedantic, salt doesn't "dissolve" ice. It's melts it by lowering the freezing point of water, as a colligative property. If anything, the salt is dissolved into water by the ice.

You could just ignore it. Winter doesn't come up very often. Or to be passive aggressive, you can lay down a brine instead of salt crystals. Try to see him sweep that up.
 

ghiacciato

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Sep 28, 2010
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zfactor said:
Well, I would have salted his driveway to begin with, thus avoiding rage.

You didn't salt his driveway because he didn't shovel yours? He's 70 years old, he only had the stamina to shovel one driveway (my grandfather would cut his grass in about 4 intervals, stopping to rest every half hour or so). Maybe he was going in for a break when you came home. Maybe he was going to shovel your half, but you interrupted him. Maybe his grandsons came over and only shoveled his half.

If you salted both driveways, it would have showed you had no hard feelings (even though you didn't) about whatever occured that prevented him from shoveling your half (even if it was you neighbor's mind). He might have come over and thanked you. It could have been the start of a beautiful friendship.

So next time, be more forgiving. It's better in the long run.
My hat off to you.
OP, what do you really expected of a 70 year old guy? It's easy to see bad in other people if you're after it from the beginning, and I could think of a dozen scenarios where he wasn't trying to be an ass, but just catched some interuption, or something else that prevented him from doing your half. As you said yourself, the process of salting wasn't challenging at all, so why not throw two, three, four hands of salt over on his side, too? He's 70 years old and still fit enough to broom his driveway, that's an achievement in itself.
 

Mekado

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Mar 20, 2009
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Hader said:
Confront him about it. Nicely though.

However, I wouldn't use salt in the first place. Not on my driveway. At least where I live, it's useless to waste money on salt when it's just going to be shitty snowy weather no matter what. It's just a little bit of ice too...nothing my 10 years of hockey experience can't help me handle.
De-icing salt costs like 3$ for 20 pounds, it's not like it's very expensive...
 

Radeonx

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Apr 26, 2009
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Just be a good person and salt his side. That's what I'd do. He is a grumpy old man, is it really that big of a deal to shovel some snow and pour some salt?
Or I suppose you could be like him and continue to ignore his side.
 

Trivun

Stabat mater dolorosa
Dec 13, 2008
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Wait until he does it a few more times. If he keeps on doing it every time, or most times, when you salt or shovel your side of the driveway, then confront him about it. People like that should be held to account for their actions, and shouldn't be allowed to be so selfish and nasty.

However, if you do confront him, do it in a fairly subtle, polite way. Don't be confrontational, if that makes sense. Try and be friendly yet firm with him, and make sure he answers you, so you can get a straight answer and hopefully either a proper justification or an end to the problem without potentially making your relationship with the guy any worse.
 

Hader

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Jul 7, 2010
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Mekado said:
De-icing salt costs like 3$ for 20 pounds, it's not like it's very expensive...
I still view it as a hassle. And not entirely worth it. Price aside.