its my opinion and i make it a point to tell people my opinion in full, your concept from your description is what you asked everyone here to comment on not your full body of work and i commented on what i was given and was not impressed, nor did it seem all that well thought out in its presentation, a mish-mash of ancient(and well established at least in concept)creatures from myth being thrown together in a science fiction/fantasy thriller, mystery(cover up), ancient alien, horror story, it lacks focus and I was suggesting if you wanted to publish it as it was from your description to change it radically or scrap it completely and start anew, it reminded me of the blood ocean episode of dethklok.Torkuda said:Wow... I don't even know what to say... do you regularly pass severe judgement in friendly conversations about things you know almost nothing about? What makes a scene creepy is it's presentation really, if you want to go into it, not just whether it's been done before.4ged said:as to the subject of vampires in popular culture, everything has been laid out quite nice as to what qualifies as a vampire in any story/context so if your writing is going to be published and you want to sell books take notes on what was freely given to you on this thread, if its for your personal cannon they can be barney the bloodsucking dinosaur for all it matters. as to your story being scary because blah blah (insert generic OC from a middle-schooler name here) pumped some clueless twats house with blood, sorry dude your 4 decades late on the walls bleeding being scary. take queues from Hannibal Lector, that guy is human and old and is one thousand times scarier then your bath salts sniffing alien dinosaurs.
let me show you context in which my lazy boy chair has similarity's to a pit bull
both are comfy to lay on
both have interesting smells emanating from them constantly
both seem to be water resistant
both hurt me when i kick them
seriously repeating this form of logical fallacy makes you sound really unintelligent/trolly
all in all your story so far described needs a lot of work in its base concept and using a popular label to sell your tripe is deplorable.
take my opinion at face value $0.00 because that's what its worth but i'm sure its widely shared, not trying to down on your creation but just telling you what you need to hear before you sink more time and energy into it and get told its shit.
But seriously, what did I do to you that I get this kind of hate? Actually Finders and Societies in the Shadows generally impresses people when I show them.
Take a look if you want.
http://torkuda.deviantart.com/art/0-Hound-of-Rebirth-177933076
Read it or not, you're going to call it tripe, I know this because from the looks of your post that's just what guys like you do. I've given you a basic description of an element from a story with no context and you're telling me you can understand it's quality... just wow.
creepy is a subjective term, one that plays on the mind through the senses, a thesaurus in invaluable.
its an opinion guy, a rough one but i don't sugar coat it so that you could be successful rather then be the tone def girl that's tolled she can sing only to be later insulted into an assisted suicide by Simon coulee because her family and friends wanted to spare her feelings, I would rather you succeed then fail in that respect because good righting is something humanity needs more and if you are not publishing this and handing it out feel free to ignore this opinion as im just a dude behind a keyboard and screen.