What would be the most absurd 'gritty reboot' imaginable?

[alittlepepper]

The smurfs

Seriously imagine that

Ninja'ed. This or the Snorks.

 

[Scout Tactical]

I'd have to say one for Minecraft where every texture is some shade of gray, the main character now monologues to him/herself in a voice like they just ate an entire gravel pit, and slicing up zombies and creepers produces graphic showers of blood and dismemberment.

So, your candidates? Providing details on it is always a plus!

Minecraft already has roving undead and horror stories. I don't think it's that absurd.

On the other hand, Dog Sees God is an excellent reboot of the Peanuts comics in a dark, gritty world where most of the old gang are teenagers on drugs or have their lives spiraling into the ditch.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dog_Sees_God:_Confessions_of_a_Teenage_Blockhead

 

[The Mehster]

I thought of one.
Wii sports.

 

[Arkley]

You know what?

Batman.

Yeah. The very idea of making a dark, edgy, gritty reboot of a franchise about a guy who fights crime with gadgets while dressed as a bat is fucking retarded. No, stop right there - I don't care how much you like it or how well you think it works. I don't care how popular it is and how wrong you think I am.

It is a fucking atrocious idea that should never have happened and its popularity only serves to prove the idiocy of the Western public. Take something we already know (so it's familiar!) and give it a lick of "gritty" paint (also familiar!) and our moronic minds will convince ourselves that it's a fresh new take on a beloved franchise, and we'll flock to see it in droves.

Fuck you, everyone who likes the edgy Batman. You're no better than the CoD/Halo fanboys you no doubt look down your nose at.

At least Batman was fucking original when it was about a camp guy in a skintight outfit fighting crime by dancing with an underage boy.

 

[DocMcCray]

Contra done live action.

Murder done pure and simple.

There would be more bullets fired than words of dialogue spoken....if done correctly.

 

[Varanfan9]

The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.
Haruhi is a goth who uses her powers to bring forth all sorts of unspeakable Lovecraftian horrors into the world to seek revenge on her fellow students who mocked her ways.

 

[Sir Thomas Sean Connery]

Oooh! How about about a dark gritty Sonic reboot about a side character?
And you would use guns and stuff! Boy, I'm glad no studio is THAT stupid.

Spoiler: Oh wait

[image/]http://www.dan-dare.org/Dan%20Sonic/ShadowTheHedgehogWallpaper800.jpg[/IMG]

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

Little Big Plan-oh wait, they already made Limbo. Howw about Zelda: Wind Waker then? A lot of potential there for grizzly infaticide anmd to turn Ganondorf into some kind of Freddy Krueger esque pedophile, giving him an even more insidious motive for kidnapping Zelda. I know, even as I right this some moron has probably already thought of this idea, and thinks its brilliant.

 

[DuctTapeJedi]

"Veggie Tales"

I don't even know how it would be done, but I kind of want some one to try now...

 

[captaincabbage]

The Mario Brothers, and after seeing this GTA4 machinima, I reckon it'd work.

 

[RatRace123]

[HEADING=1]kirby[/HEADING]
I think this wins the thread.

My friend, Kirby is already gritty.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AmericanKirbyIsHardcore

Side Note: Very very sorry for linking to Tvtropes, hope you don't have to do anything for the next few hours.

 

[AnthonTheSkabot]

Sponge Bob, that would be ridiculously amazing.

 

[Professor James]

Phineas and Ferb.

The titular characters would be mad inventors who constantly unleash reality-warping abominations upon the populace, all the while maintaining a carefully constructed false innocence. Candice is a completely ignored, constantly arrested protagonist slowly being driven insane by her futile efforts to convince the people that P&F are evil. Isabella and the Fireside girls would be P&F's logistics team (thieves essentially), Bufort would by the bodyguard and Baljeet would be the twisted messwork guy. Stacy would be a cop sympathetic to Candice's cause, even if she doesn't quite believe her, and is the one who is always bringing Candice in.

what about perry the platypus and Dr. Doofensmirtz(not sure if I spelled that right.)

 

[Toriver]

Toy story: Woody as an old retired cowboy, Buzz as the new tough guy in town. I don't even want to imagine the rest.

I can see it now: No Country for Old Toys

Buzz gets a little out of control with some air-pump action...

As for mine,
Scribblenauts: In a dark and dystopian future, a team of ordinary Joe-shmoes must take on the brutal dictator Max, who has the power to summon anything or anyone he can think of at will.

 

[zfactor]

I'd have to say one for Minecraft where every texture is some shade of gray, the main character now monologues to him/herself in a voice like they just ate an entire gravel pit, and slicing up zombies and creepers produces graphic showers of blood and dismemberment.

So, your candidates? Providing details on it is always a plus!

But Minecraft hasn't even come out yet, so it wouldn't be a reboot, but a pre-release-knock-off.

 

[RatRace123]

EDIT: I remembered this little video after writing this. It's fake, of course:

Is it sacrelige to say that that would be cool? You know just as a one off thing.

 

[Ultraman950]

The Power Rangers.

... Just... the Power Rangers.

 

[shogunblade]

Contra done live action.

Murder done pure and simple.

There would be more bullets fired than words of dialogue spoken....if done correctly.

...There are trailers of Contra...


And if there was any way to create something in an awesome gritty reboot way, I would definitely say Mega Man X. No, not Mega Man, I'm talking Mega Man X.

 

[EightGaugeHippo]

Pac-Man Noir.