What would you bring to the aliens?

[Hey Joe]

Possibly belonging in Forum Games, but I'll give it a shot out here anyhow.

Okay, here it is.

Say one day you're in your cornfields in Nebraska...or Winsconsin orone of those dreary towns. You're just admiring the corn, thinking about Betty from across the way when HOLY SHIT ALIENS!

The aliens have come, and they point their probulators straight at you. They finally speak in low tones. It seems they have a request of you. They want you to bring five items to them that typyfy the human race. Or they'll PROBE YOU RIGHT IN THE ANUS.

So, what would you bring to the little green men and why?

What is with me copying threads today?

 

[DannyDamage]

Money, Big Mac, Beer, a Japanese School-Girl wank-mag and a Baby.

Rather cynical attempt on my behalf. If I feel up to it later I may make more of a positive contribution

 

[Frybird]

I'll let them probe me if, in exchange, i can give them a list of People that should be zapped with a Ray Gun.
Just doing my part to make the world a better place.


If they don't get into that deal, Money, Big Mac, a newspaper, Porn and the loudest, most gas-guzzling sportscar i can find.

Yes, most of that stuff has Danny already, but yeah, it defines the current state of humanity well.

 

[Combined]

I'll exchange porn for alien porn. Then sell that on Ebay. Other than that - Whiskey. The best drink ever. I Love You, Whiskey.

And I'd give them the secret to deep frying shoes. Always helps.

 

[notyouraveragejoe]

So, what would you bring to the little green men and why?]

What would you bring? (sorry but I think you should join in the random fun as well )

I would bring:

The entire first season of American Idol to show what the masses love.

The movie Jarhead to show them that war isn't as epic as people think.

A video game system plus game (any of the good ones) to show what people like to do.

Batman The First 50 Comics collection just because it is so freaking awesome! (Yeah I am a bit of a nerd...)

Master of Puppets original record so that they can experience something that I personally love.

If I had a six it would be a case of vodka so we could get them drunk and avoid anal probing.

 

[rossatdi]

Hmmm....

That's a tough one. Right.

16 year old single malt scotch - "Drink this, it may prepare you for the rest of us".

Gun - "If there's one thing we do, it's kill each other. This is good example of a tool we use."

Stretcher - "But that brutality does give way to decency. If there's two things we do, the second is carry each other." [Might be necessary to explain the symbolism.]

Copy of the Geneva Convention - "But we have potential, we are striving to make things better despite our nature. Every now and again we do make great leaps forward, incidentally don't look up the Great Leap Forward."

Copies of Macbeth, Oedipus Rex and The Once & Future King. - "We like telling stories, here are three good ones to get you going."

 

[Hey Joe]

I would bring the following things.

1. A record of Mozart's works in a sign of the human race's creativity

2. A wheel to signify our inventiveness

3. A fat man to signify our greediness

4. An empty beer can to signify our wastefulness

5. A smiling child to show our hope

 

[jessehalljrw]

a fucking rocket loncher

 

[creaney]

an internet connection and a netbook.

 

[DannyDamage]

If I had a six it would be a case of vodka so we could get them drunk and avoid anal probing.

.....Or just make it less of a problem for you.

 

[Hevoo]

I would bring the following things.

1. A record of Mozart's works in a sign of the human race's creativity

2. A wheel to signify our inventiveness

3. A fat man to signify our greediness

4. An empty beer can to signify our wastefulness

5. A smiling child to show our hope

To deep for this forum.

But..

1. A computer with internet, for what we know,
2. US constitution, showing our best form of government we have.
3. A book of each major religion, for what we believe,
4. A book "All quiet on the western front" Show them war, but also the human spirit.
5. Picture of our world. Because this is our home.