What's the dumbest thing you've ever heard or overheard someone say?

[Josh123914]

In a Geography exam the class was marking one of the questions was ''How many states are there in the USA?'', I put my hand up and said 50 but nearly half of my class started yelling that I was wrong and that there was apparently 52.
I wish I was making this up (although being 14 in an all Boys school might have something to do with it).

 

[Berenzen]

I'm pretty sure I'm about to /thread this, but this was an argument that was presented towards me that god existed(I was pretty open about my atheism and some people, such as this person, took offence to it and tried to convert me, without success). I'm not singling out religious groups here, as I'm pretty sure that even the most fundamental religious types will facepalm at this. Anyways, here it is:

The reason the sky is blue is because there was once water in a shell around the Earth, but a hole was formed- which we now think is the ozone layer- and as a result, the earth flooded, and that caused Noah's flood. But the water has been evaporating and returning up and reforming the shell so that's why the world isn't flooded anymore. And because water is blue, and we can see it in the sky, that's why the sky is blue. But nothing could have created that hole except for a God, so therefore god exists.

That was the gist of it but it was several years ago, so I can't remember the exact words and logic he used- it's probably a repressed memory due to the pain that it caused to my brain- but that night I cried for the future of humanity. The same guy presented me with other stuff that was almost as bad, but nothing that sticks out like this did.

 

[WorriedSandwich]

'If you would develop a pneumothorax (bubble of air between lungs, dangerous), why not just continue breathing via your nose?'

In 5th grade on a pretty prestigious school. Heh.

 

[Daget Sparrow]

My niece, berating my nephew for being a "stupid idiot".

I've heard better ones, but that's the only one in recent memory I've got to share.

 

[vrbtny]

Are you sure your sister was just not being utterly awesome?.... or developing a army of triffid eating ladybirds.

It's entirely possible knowing my sister.

Well, if she is, get a warning out! The world will need to develop a weapon to defend our fictional trees.... also defend ourselves from enormous great big ladybirds!

It's okay, according to smokeyninjas friend, trees aren't alive so we should be good!

Yes! But this is your sister! If she can make Ladybirds big enough they are capable of eating Triffids, she must be more than capable than making trees live.... you haven't ever shown her lord of the rings have you? We don't want to give her any ideas.

"What's the capital of London" comes up fairly often

I...Wait, what? Does not compute.

 

[Darkmantle]

girl in my history class

"what happened first, world war ONE or world war TWO"

facepalm facepalm facepalm

 

[NinjaCatStudios]

"What's the capital of London" comes up fairly often.

Once, a few years ago in PE my class had to watch a film because we couldnt do PE for some reason (hurray!), we watched "Space Jam"
Just as it got the the animated bit near the start, someone asked "Is this a true story!?"

A friend of mine who doesnt celebrate christmas tried to convince me that santa wasn't real, somehow he thought that you had to believe in santa to celebrate christmas, he knew that I am atheist. WTF somehow I believe in Santa yet not God?

Once in the changing rooms of PE, when people where doing their usual chanting about me and started taking it a bit too far, once one person took sympathy this other person immediantly followed, blatantly copying him.

 

[Rikomag132]

Any kind of religious or historically/scientifically inaccurate bullshit just brings my piss to a boil. Also, people accepting gays way too much. It's like, ffs. When you think about it, it's really a mental condition and not a "choice of life" or "personality trait" as many describe it. And yeah, whatever, if they wanna get married so fucking much just let them, but BY FUCK, don't let them adopt children (mindfuck).

You've got to be kidding me.. That's terrible, just like you. Being gay isn't a "mental condition".. It's something that's perfectly normal, however, believing that being gay is wrong, that should be considered a mental condition.
/Progay rant end.

 

[Filip Bosnjak]

I am only in grade eight but half my class didn't now what the holocaust was . Six million people died and you have never heard of it. They also thought that their is a drug called Mexican speed ball and so did my teacher. We Googled it and found out it was a paint ball place. And everyone makes stupid comments like "humans used to ride dinosaurs". They also believe that such comments are extremely witty.

 

[HalfTangible]

Anytime people use the phrase 'just kidding' when they're just WRONG WRONG WRONG!! Like this:

"I thought Europe was a country?...It's not? Oh. Just kidding! =D"

Oh, and this one:

"But how did you FUCK the seagull?"

And this one, a conversation between a black woman and a white guy that i walked in on while pushing carts in at a grocery store:
"What, you think cuz i'm black i have a gun?!"
"You just finished threatening to shoot me. I assume that means you have a gun."
"You racist asshole. I'm gonna take the moral high road and walk away." *walks away, looking thoroughly pleased with herself*
"Whatever ma'am."
*beat*
"Hmph. Aetheist!" (still the woman)

One I heard in class, when talking about how a utopia project, was

"Money doesn't grow, it's value doesn't change".

Of course that's how it works. That's why inflation is a lie and coke still costs five cents

Representative Money (such as paper) has, from it's very inception, been the exact same value it always has been: Zero. Nada. Squat. The things we back it up with have value but never the money itself.

 

[Anthony Wells]

Someone in Spanish class asked if a beach had to be connected to the ocean. I find it quite sad that she lacks common knowledge yet spends much of her time on facebook. But you can't live life without being happy right?

it has to be connected to a body of water but as far as i know a beach can be at a lake as well.



OT: my little sister: the earth is less then 200 years old and all the stuff ins school is wrong. god created everything 200 years ago. or something along those lines....no facepalms in the world large enough. she was 10 when she said it. she's fifteen now. she denies ever saying it.

 

[TheNaut131]

My high school science teacher, while teaching us about fossils: Approximately 65 million years ago.... *blah blah blah*. no, that must be wrong the earth is only 6 thousand years old.

Me: *smashes head on desk*

You see, that's the part where someone should've stood up, pointed at the door, and said "Get the fuck out of here."

OT: This is perhaps one of the dumbest moments that truly sticks out in my mind. Okay, so a friend of the family was helping us during the Summer. My father was overseas and my mother was at work, so she'd occasionally drop in, make sure we were okay, etc, etc. She was about 20 something, in college, you know the rest.

We were watching TV and they were talking about the Space Shuttle (Don't remember which one) going to the International Space Station. I can't exactly remember what happened but at some point, she said the Space Shuttle was going to the Moon. I explained to her how she was wrong and that it was going to the International Space Station. She tells me I'm wrong and laughs the most annoying condescending laugh I have ever heard. I then go through the motions explaining to her how the Space Shuttle can is incapable of even attempting to land on the Moon at this time, if ever. She then tells me I'm wrong again, chuckling like an annoying *****. I get irritated, raise my voice a bit, and then motion towards the TV, which actually says something along the lines of "Space Shuttle on way to ISS" in bold fucking letters at the bottom of the screen! The thing the reporters have been actually fucking talking about for the last 15 minutes!

That ***** has the nerve to tell me I'm being an idiot and that I'm wrong. Mother of God. I was ready to lose it. Luckily, my brother changed the channel and we dropped it. A few months later, she says something like, "Ready to admit you were wrong and that the Space Shuttle went to the Moon?" I try to explain to her again, but I get the same annoying reaction...

Funny thing, I haven't seen her in a few years, but something tells me she still thinks shes right.

...ALL OF MY HATRED.

 

[Clive Howlitzer]

If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.

 

[bruggs]

"Can blind people, like, drive? Cause they can hear and stuff"

"I thought every country had its own sun..."

 

[Mycroft Holmes]

Lots of obvious ones that I'm sure everyone has heard. Like "If evolution is true why are there still monkeys." Tons of failure to understand evolution actually, like people who thinks its a ladder from worse to better. People who think we can't accept that different races evolved differently because then we have to say that one is better, which is not how evolution freaking works. Then there's people who say things like "wait isn't Alaska an island?" Then there's people who try to appear authoritative and informed on subjects they know nothing about.

And when pressed on it will just keep repeating the same thing over. Like when an acquaintance of mine said that 'gold standard was stupid and outdated' and when I asked him what economically speaking about it is stupid, because I'm a big fan of the gold standard as it prevents the government from forcibly devaluing currency. And he just kind of sputtered and kept saying the same thing over and over like it was somehow inherent, because he heard an economist say it before. For another example of that:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YK0d8ENS__c&feature=player_detailpage#t=246s

That is all somewhat forgivable though, even smart people have giant holes in their knowledge(the fictional character of Sherlock Holmes was even written as not knowing that the Earth went around the sun.) But to add an actual terrible story.

I'm a pretty big history buff and in my opinion in order to teach a class you should actually know what the hell you are talking about. A professor for a class on revolutions and revolts asserted that Chernov was a Menshevik. I pointed out that he was wrong and he just flat out said no. I pointed out that the source material he had just passed out literally proved him wrong. He said that the SRs and the Mensheviks were the same party. Which is blatantly untrue, even when they finally broke down and helped each other under the banner of the White Army, they still hated each other and were politically distinct groups. I backed off on it, because I'm not going to shout the professor down in his own class, but I verified my opinion with an honest-to-God Sovietologist who was a little O.O that a professor would blatantly say something so stupid.

I am only in grade eight but half my class didn't now what the holocaust was . Six million people died and you have never heard of it.

11 million people died in the holocaust. People think its six million because the Jews get all the attention from it. Which is not intended in anyway to marginalize what they went through, but to point out that another 5 million people were put to death. The Elderly, gypsies, homosexuals, political dissidents, pacifists, Slavs and Russians were all put to death in concentration camps.

 

[mysecondlife]

"I don't think the acting in Star Wars original trilogy was good. The acting in prequel series were lot better"

That was kind of dumb I guess.

 

[Nouw]

Someone in Spanish class asked if a beach had to be connected to the ocean. I find it quite sad that she lacks common knowledge yet spends much of her time on facebook. But you can't live life without being happy right?

it has to be connected to a body of water but as far as i know a beach can be at a lake as well.

My memory is shaky but I think you're onto something here. Miscommunication and ambiguity can be a cause of dumb statements.

 

[AmrasCalmacil]

'Katanas can cut through tanks'
On this very website.
I wept inside.

 

[museofdoom]

Adding one I saw on Facebook today: "OMG everyone stop saying that Justin Bieber ruined a Beatles song or whatever.. HE WROTE IT HIMSELF STOP HATING." I shit you not. I hate Justin Bieber more than ever. One does not simply cover a Beatles song, especially not Let It Be.