When do you become an adult?

[tippy2k2]

I was listening to my local radio morning show (Dave Ryan if you are interested) and they had a most fascinating discussion. I determined that it would be a great idea to steal and thought I'd bring it into the thread.

As most of us would understand, becoming an adult is not necessarily an age thing but more specific events and experiences that shape you into the man/woman that you are (or will become).

The morning show had one serious entry and one not so serious entry:

Serious entry stated that when you are completely financially independent (so no borrowing money from mom and dad). You can have roommates and whatnot but your life is paid for by you.

Less serious entry was when you get a headboard for your bed. You decided that you needed a headboard for your bed and you went out and purchased one (so no, kids who had a headboard growing up do not count since your parents bought it).

Is it a silly "rite of passage" that puts you in adulthood or is it a serious "Has to be done" type thing? When you move out? When you hit 21? Buying a car? When you realize that waking up covered in vomit and barely remembering last night is not something you want to keep doing? When do you think you become an adult (serious answer or less-serious fun answer is acceptable)?

 

[Vegosiux]

Well, no, there's no "rite pf passage", and there's no "has to be done" thing. I also think the proces is gradual, but you're an adult when you can be accountable for your life. That doesn't mean you have to be independent or live on your own, sometimes that's not possible, but you need to do your part anywhere. It also comes down to some paradigm shifts in your thought process, such as realizing and understanding that life isn't a party, but

A bit cynically, you know you're an adult when you look back and start wishing the worst of your worries were what used to be the worst possible thing a decade ago.

 

[Bassik]

Nobody ever becomes an adult, ever. Just very tall children.

 

[Scarim Coral]

I see it more as a realise type of thing and then acting according to being an adult which is a gradual effect.

 

[Heronblade]

Responsibility in thought and deed is the key hallmark of an adult, there's no specific event or status that determines it, and it is entirely possible to lose adult status by that standard. I've known financially independent college graduates that were less capable of being responsible than some 10-12 year old children I know.

 

[isometry]

When the frontal lobe of your brain is fully formed (it varies, age 20-30).

 

[DANEgerous]

Hopefully never, i wish to remain a child that can pay his own bills and function (somewhat) normal with in a society.

To me being an adult is when you assume responsibility for pointless shit like how nice your yard looks, your wardrobe, what your boss thinks of you basically you "Keeping up with the Jones" make you an adult as does working a job you despise to make money so you can buy things to impress others.

This is no to say you need to neglect actual responsibility that you truly have if you have people who depend on you you need to keep them well and you actions should not harm people other than yourself, but as far as needing acceptance from the world that you are do good that is what ages you, the rat race.

 

[Spinozaad]

The moment you realise that you knew nothing 'back then', and infer from that realisation that you still know nothing.

 

[Toasty Virus]

When you stop having to rely on other people and are responsible enough to have people rely on you.

 

[triggrhappy94]

Legally, this September. I plan on buying a gun and using it to shoot holes in my absenty ballot. I plan on buying a porn mag and some tabaco, and using some of the pages out of the mag to roll and smoke the tabaco. Then, I'm going to use a slot machine (gambling) to chose which tatoo I get.

OT:
I kind of liked the Headboard responce. It's not necessarily serious, but it brings up a good point. It marks the point where you feel it's neccessary to buy a completely pointless decoration that most people in your house aren't going to see.

 

[Queen Michael]

When you stop doing the kind of stupid things that aren't all that stupid.

 

[tippy2k2]

OT:
I kind of liked the Headboard responce. It's not necessarily serious, but it brings up a good point. It marks the point where you feel it's neccessary to buy a completely pointless decoration that most people in your house aren't going to see.

That's kind of what I was thinking. I'm at the point in my life where I can't spend really any money on anything but I'm looking into purchasing a place of my own (been renting for years). I'm genuinely excited to be able to start the "home" stuff...

With that, I loved:

Hopefully never, i wish to remain a child that can pay his own bills and function (somewhat) normal with in a society.

To me being an adult is when you assume responsibility for pointless shit like how nice your yard looks, your wardrobe, what your boss thinks of you basically you "Keeping up with the Jones" make you an adult as does working a job you despise to make money so you can buy things to impress others.

This is no to say you need to neglect actual responsibility that you truly have if you have people who depend on you you need to keep them well and you actions should not harm people other than yourself, but as far as needing acceptance from the world that you are do good that is what ages you, the rat race.

I can be excited about the "boring adult life" while still being able to do the fun "child" stuff. I still intend to play Magic the Gathering. I still intend to play my video games. I still intend to play sports. I can do the boring stuff while keeping the fun stuff!

 

[Rawne1980]

I didn't become an "adult" until my first child was born and I stopped acting like a moron.

Age had sod all to do with it considering I was in my mid 20's then.

Joining the army should have "matured" me but we all still acted like bloody kids on our time off.

 

[DoPo]

Well, no, there's no "rite pf passage", and there's no "has to be done" thing. I also think the proces is gradual, but you're an adult when you can be accountable for your life. That doesn't mean you have to be independent or live on your own, sometimes that's not possible, but you need to do your part anywhere. It also comes down to some paradigm shifts in your thought process, such as realizing and understanding that life isn't a party, but

A bit cynically, you know you're an adult when you look back and start wishing the worst of your worries were what used to be the worst possible thing a decade ago.

A bit of what he said. There isn't something you have to do to become an adult, there are a series of small things that gradually make you one. Perhaps the closest thing to "rite of passage" is when you find yourself do something and realise "Hey, children don't do that shit. That must mean I'm an adult."

That happened to me a couple of years ago, I was looking at the gas and electricity bills and discussed them with my flatmate when it suddenly hit me - children don't pay bills! Fuck, and those weren't the first bills, either - we had lived there for close to half a year already. Then I took a sip from my beer because adults could have a beer just for the sake of the beer and that's what we were doing.

 

[Just_A_Glitch]

I don't think anyone is completely an adult until they have a child. And even then, its debatable.

Disclaimer: I do not have a child, nor do I intend on having one anytime soon. Just something I've kind of thought for years.

 

[deehadley]

As soon as you see a penis drawn (be it graffiti, condensation on a bus, in snow etc) and don't smile you are an adult, thus, I will never be considered adult.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

When you stop doing the kind of stupid things that aren't all that stupid.

And start doing the really stupid things.

OT: Before we can properly answer that we must first define what it means to be an adult.

 

[Loner Jo Jo]

I guess it depends on how you define adult. There is a biological definiton of the end of puberty, being able to reproduce and being physically mature. However, most people don't buy that definition, and I certainly don't either.

There's the being able to take care of yourself, so financial independence would be the obvious hallmark. This is probably the one I agree with most because this is the one I'm closest to achieving. (College senior)

There's the idea that you are an adult when other people view you as an adult. Of course this varies, but the headboard crack would fit here. A person who wants to be perceived as an adult will act in accordance to that ideal, both in the positive sense of becoming independent but also in the negative sense of "keeping up with the Jones'".

However, I think there is also the definition of you are an adult when you don't think of yourself first. I don't think this happens for most people until they have a child of their own or a dependent of some sort. Suddenly, the world is not about you anymore; it's about taking care of another person who utterly cannot take care of themselves. Of course, mind you, there are those rare individuals who achieve this without having children -- those people who dedicate their lives to charity or something along those lives.

Of course, this is all coming out of the mouth of a child since I am nowhere near becoming a true adult yet in any sense of the word excluding the biological sense.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

I kind of liked the Headboard responce. It's not necessarily serious, but it brings up a good point. It marks the point where you feel it's neccessary to buy a completely pointless decoration that most people in your house aren't going to see.

Um, not necessarily.

My spouse and I went out to buy a headboard so we'd have something to attach our hand-cuffs and other bondage equipment to, and so that in certain positions, I would have something solid to grab on to.

So headboards DO serve a function. They are sexual accessories.

Edit: Not that the headboard isn't stylish and pretty. It is, and it matches the room decor (and my beautifully framed limited edition Xenogears poster) wonderfully.

 

[NathLines]

Nobody ever becomes an adult, ever. Just very tall children.

Pretty much this. Your priorities in life may change over time, but part of you will probably still be the same kid you've always been no matter how old you are. LEGO fo' life, yo.

Captcha: men in suits... Ominous.