When there's a tragedy there's also "those people"

[hoboman29]

I don't give a fuck not because I'm totally apathetic but rather because I get so tired of hearing it on the news that I find it hard to care. Yeah that guy in Connecticut was crazy and this was terrible for happening but if I have to sit through another moment of silence or be asked to pray or donate money to the victims then I will snap. It's like they're begging for pity and such. To be honest its really tiring to hear this and there are still weeks of coverage to go.

 

[runic knight]

A lot of people seemed to have missed the point. The complaint here seems to be not about people who don't feel something. Instead, it is about the ones who's only committed response in any discussion on the topic is a pointless waste of space declaring their own lack of caring on the subject. Not only is the post itself useless, both in a discussion and in terms of, well, no one gives a shit if you care or not, but it also both shows an underlying need to get attention out of the event itself (a subtle hint that some shits were indeed given, thus making the poster full of shit even if only because they care in how to get attention from the events) and a disregard for any meaningful or even worthwhile discussion outside of their own self validation that they don't care.


Or in short, no one gives a shit if you don't care. Save yourself and everyone else the time and stop posting that garbage you arrogant twats.

 

[Laughing Man]

I am one of those people, I am sure somewhere I am meant to care about these people but I really don't, I am sorry if that makes me a bad person but that's just the way it is...


...however, while I may not care about such and such a person has died or so and so many people killed by event x I won't post about it in a topic created about it. The fact is if I don't care about the event the chances that anyone posting in a topic about it is going to care that I don't care, well it just ain't worth the hassle.

 

[manic_depressive13]

So you don't care that people feel that way as long as they don't say it aloud? That's a bit arbitrary. I'm glad that people like that exist if only because they annoy you.

Hey, the first post was by one of Those people, Nice!

No. 'Those people', according to the OP, are people who post in threads about tragedy saying they don't care. I haven't done that in any of the Connecticut threads and I didn't do it in this thread. Please don't make baseless accusations. It makes you look pathetic.

 

[Lugbzurg]

So you don't care that people feel that way as long as they don't say it aloud? That's a bit arbitrary. I'm glad that people like that exist if only because they annoy you.

Congratulations on missing the point in its entirety!

Unless of course, you're one of "those people" that Vault101 was just talking about.

 

[manic_depressive13]

Congratulations on missing the point in its entirety!

Unless of course, you're one of "those people" that Vault101 was just talking about.

I got the point perfectly. Vault is saying "It's fine if you're an asshole as long as you don't vocalise it" and I think that's a pointless and unhelpful stipulation. Whether or not their feelings are vocalised, the result is exactly the same. Furthermore, Those people aren't just found during major tragedies. They're found in discussions about the morality of killing animals or the ethics of our current foreign policy. I find it precious that Vault is complaining about Those people in relation to school shootings when she herself has been one of Those people in threads about vegetarianism, saying things like "I just don't care about animals". And that's fine. It's her right to say it and it gives others an overview of how different people respond to particular situations. These are just things you have to learn to fucking deal with, and complaining about it is petty. I can understand saying "you shouldn't feel this way" but I can't understand "you shouldn't admit that you feel this way". That's as unconducive to discussion as she claims these people's comments are.

 

[teebeeohh]

Everyone I personally know who has that attitude actually does care about the dead but the amount of media coverage just makes them sick. I mean there are significant parts of my age group for whom being famous/acknowledged is more important than anything else and we show them how to get a month worth of total media coverage.
And the hypocrisy that this gets so much attention but more people die in Syria every day and at most that's a side note.
We only care about people we feel are like us dying but we like to pretend we care about everyone.

Edit: It's also the thing that if they don't post something a few month down the line people will look at the discussion and be like"everybody cared so much" when that simply isn't true. Now, just saying "I don't care" without any form of context is not the most eloquent way to express your opinion but its valid nonetheless

 

[Vault101]

[spoiler/]A lot of people seemed to have missed the point. The complaint here seems to be not about people who don't feel something. Instead, it is about the ones who's only committed response in any discussion on the topic is a pointless waste of space declaring their own lack of caring on the subject. Not only is the post itself useless, both in a discussion and in terms of, well, no one gives a shit if you care or not, but it also both shows an underlying need to get attention out of the event itself (a subtle hint that some shits were indeed given, thus making the poster full of shit even if only because they care in how to get attention from the events) and a disregard for any meaningful or even worthwhile discussion outside of their own self validation that they don't care.


Or in short, no one gives a shit if you don't care. Save yourself and everyone else the time and stop posting that garbage you arrogant twats.[/spoiler]

bingo! we have a winner....

I got the point perfectly. Vault is saying "It's fine if you're an asshole as long as you don't vocalise it" and I think that's a pointless and unhelpful stipulation.

I don't advocate being an asshole...it doesnt make you an asshole if you "don't care" about the tradgedy within reason (I'd be rasing my eyebrows at somone doesnt find the idea of all those kinds sad AT ALL)

[quote/]Whether or not their feelings are vocalised, the result is exactly the same.[/quote]
perhaps its too much to expect people to not act like dicks in an internet forum (and I say acts like dicks because such statments contribute nothing, there is a difference) perhaps in not in a forum but there are times people need to STFU...I guess thats what real life is for

[quote/]Furthermore, Those people aren't just found during major tragedies. They're found in discussions about the morality of killing animals or the ethics of our current foreign policy. I find it precious that Vault is complaining about Those people in relation to school shootings when she herself has been one of Those people in threads about vegetarianism, saying things like "I just don't care about animals". And that's fine. It's her right to say it and it gives others an overview of how different people respond to particular situations. These are just things you have to learn to fucking deal with, and complaining about it is petty. I can understand saying "you shouldn't feel this way" but I can't understand "you shouldn't admit that you feel this way". That's as unconducive to discussion as she claims these people's comments are.[/quote]
you got you jimmies rustled over the animal thing...and yet you act dissmissive when I say I have a problem with attention seeking "I don't care" people?

if I did say somthing along the lines of "I don't care about animals" I probably didn't say that and only that (and add in some joke about hamburgers) I would have explained my stance and reasons as in contributing somthing to the discussion

and off topic but I do care about animals, to a certain extent that is

 

[DaKiller]

I think the problem with ''those people'' is they don't care about the people who died but they care that other people care. It's like "Why do you care? Your opinion on this is stupid!" I may not care as much about these things as I should, but at least I don't log on to chastise the rest of you for it!

 

[Hagi]

To chip in a bit more, I can somewhat understand these replies coming from people who actually did care at some point and cared very much. Cared enough to take action at which point they were abandoned by all the people claiming to care as well.

And now this is a way for them to call out others on what they see as hypocrisy and lies, because for them caring isn't just in saying it but also in acting like it.

And the sad truth is that whilst many people say they care, and may very well do so, they often don't act like it. And, to them, someone who doesn't act upon his/her proclaimed caring doesn't actually care at all.

Personally I'd say it's possible to care without feeling you have to act on it, but I do doubt the sincerity of some of the depth of caring others proclaim.

 

[manic_depressive13]

you got you jimmies rustled over the animal thing...and yet you act dissmissive when I say I have a problem with attention seeking "I don't care" people?

if I did say somthing along the lines of "I don't care about animals" I probably didn't say that and only that (and add in some joke about hamburgers) I would have explained my stance and reasons as in contributing somthing to the discussion

and off topic but I do care about animals, to a certain extent that is

You're missing my point. I didn't get my jimmies rustled. I said it is useful for people to voice opinions I don't like or disagree with so I can establish:

1. Stastically, how many people in my community value (or don't value) certain conventions/ideas/behaviours.
2. Why do they feel that way? (eg, Are they emotionally exhausted by the frequency of such occurences? Are they angry at the imbalanced reporting or apparent hypocricy? Do they perceive emotional distance as something cool or desireable?)

If they don't immediately specify why you can always ask.

I think all of these are interesting questions, and I used my animal rights example to illustrate that just because I am personally offended or annoyed by certain attitudes, sweeping them under the rug instead of addressing them or seeking to understand them is pointless.

I sincerely doubt that anyone who has been personally affected by the Connecticut tragedy is on the internet reading the comments of strangers so I don't see why commenting negatively is a huge issue. Besides, if you have lost your own child I doubt anything anyone has to say, whether positive or negative, will change how shit you feel.

Edit: And yeah, the gist of your post was "Sorry, but while I don't think they should be tortured I just don't care that we exploit them". Which again is fine. I've gotten used to stuff like that and I think you should too. I would never want people to just shut up about animal rights issues. What good is it to me if they never say a word but keep buying factory farmed meat every week? No good. Demanding silence isn't the answer. At least if I can identify them I can choose to strike up a discussion.

 

[Vault101]

1. Stastically, how many people in my community value (or don't value) certain conventions/ideas/behaviours.
2. Why do they feel that way? (eg, Are they emotionally exhausted by the frequency of such occurences? Are they angry at the imbalanced reporting or apparent hypocricy? Do they perceive emotional distance as something cool or desireable?)

but such statements don't address number 2. and as for number 1. we already know generally how people probably feel

 

[manic_depressive13]

1. Stastically, how many people in my community value (or don't value) certain conventions/ideas/behaviours.
2. Why do they feel that way? (eg, Are they emotionally exhausted by the frequency of such occurences? Are they angry at the imbalanced reporting or apparent hypocricy? Do they perceive emotional distance as something cool or desireable?)

but such statements don't address number 2. and as for number 1. we already know generally how people probably feel

You use the word "probably" meaning no, we don't really know. As for 2. I think one can often extrapolate people's motivation for commenting as they did, and as I said you can always ask them.

And since you keep cutting out and ignoring the parts where I say this, I will repeat myself yet again: Asking for people to censor themselves doesn't help anyone. Yes, ideally people should be more caring and hearing of tragedies should motivate them to prevent such things in future. But if they don't feel that way they are entitled to say so, and if you let yourself get upset by a stated opinion despite KNOWING that there are people who hold those same opinions and don't state them, you're advocating meaningless courtesies and social rules which not only do nothing to address the problem of apathy, but which incentivises the type of people who post such comments because they think they are heroes for breaking social taboos.

 

[Oly J]

I think the OP's issue can be reasonably summed up in the sentence "if you can't say something nice, say nothing at all" and I happen to agree, if you don't care about something just don't tslk about it

 

[runic knight]

[spoiler/]A lot of people seemed to have missed the point. The complaint here seems to be not about people who don't feel something. Instead, it is about the ones who's only committed response in any discussion on the topic is a pointless waste of space declaring their own lack of caring on the subject. Not only is the post itself useless, both in a discussion and in terms of, well, no one gives a shit if you care or not, but it also both shows an underlying need to get attention out of the event itself (a subtle hint that some shits were indeed given, thus making the poster full of shit even if only because they care in how to get attention from the events) and a disregard for any meaningful or even worthwhile discussion outside of their own self validation that they don't care.


Or in short, no one gives a shit if you don't care. Save yourself and everyone else the time and stop posting that garbage you arrogant twats.[/spoiler]

bingo! we have a winner....

How.... do people miss the point of this thread so badly?

 

[Smeatza]

They might have a pragmatic point?
I mean 5000 children under the age of 5 die every hour from preventable causes (or at least UNICEF say so, I'm inclined to believe them).
So if you spend most of your time helping people afflicted by extreme poverty, witnessing death, famine, violence and murder etc. on a daily basis. And noting the general apathy towards it from the west, you might want to express how little you care about some American nationals experiencing what is a daily occurrence for Somalians etc.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Oh for fucks sake, what does saying these things even accomplish? If they are so apathetic and don't care, why reply? Just ignore it and move on like any other person.

We like to point out and stare at people who we can't really understand. Why don't you care about the deaths of children? Why don't you think this tragedy is horrible, etc, etc. And then we get angry and upset when they don't give us a reason we don't like.

Ignoring it and moving on is something I've advocated for a long time. We can't change the assholes. We can only take away the attention they want. If they didn't want attention, they wouldn't post their 'I don't care' attitudes loudly and proudly in the middle of others discussing how terrible a tragedy was.

In the end, I guess I end up judging a person who lacks empathy for fellow humans. Hard to say but true. When I hear about deaths in the Gaza Strip, shootings in elementary schools or fatalities due to Hurricanes I consider how I'd feel if that happened to someone within my "Monkeysphere". I end up caring to a degree and I always hope that positive change will come out of such events so that they won't happen again or won't be nearly as bad next time. I am optimistic about how we can change for the better if we really try. I'm cynical about how many people are actually willing to try.

As it applies to the internet however, I just move on and ignore such comments. I would challenge a person as to why they feel like that if they were in the same room as me. Through the medium of moving our fingers over a bunch of buttons to communicate I can't tell how genuine a response is or not. So I don't bother.

 

[SpectacularWebHead]

So you don't care that people feel that way as long as they don't say it aloud? That's a bit arbitrary. I'm glad that people like that exist if only because they annoy you.

Hey, the first post was by one of Those people, Nice!

No. 'Those people', according to the OP, are people who post in threads about tragedy saying they don't care. I haven't done that in any of the Connecticut threads and I didn't do it in this thread. Please don't make baseless accusations. It makes you look pathetic.

Nope, You said "I am glad those people exist just because they annoy you". And you missed the point of the enitre thread. You are therefore, as part of wider blanket term, one of 'those people'.