Where would you hide a body?

[Snor]

pig farm, swamp, the zoo (omg she/he fell into the lion pen yesterday!), just chuck em into the sea small chance they will find it back and any traces to you, burn, dissolve with some chemical things, open an old grave in the graveyard and put it there?

or just hire a plain and drop the body out of it above a Belgian prison, they will be so confused that it'll take them 50 years and half a ton of Flemish fries to solve it

 

[Caliostro]

Alot of people burn the bodies. I'm pretty sure you'd get caught.

Indeed. Fires have the inconvenience of leading to a lot of very visible smoke...

I have a... Pretty much perfect way of disposing of bodies... But I can't tell you, or I'd have to do a live demonstration, and that's just inconvenient.

I'll give a hint though. There are 2 ways to dispose of something: either make it disappear completely, or make sure nobody finds it. If nobody finds it, it's as good as gone.

 

[Shemming]

Down the back of the sofa- no one checks there.

 

[Zorg Machine]

I live right by a forest. Drag it in, dig a hole and put a rock or something over it to hide the mound.

Or I would make a hollow tube of concrete, put the body inside and throw it into the ocean. the body would stay put and the salt water would remove any evidence.

 

[elvor0]

I'd eat it. No chance of finding it at all then, then make a broth stock out of the bones.

 

[Kouen]

I'd eat it. No chance of finding it at all then, then make a broth stock out of the bones.

om nom nom nom?

Well i spose if you become a murderer might as well go for the cannibal package too

 

[zerzxes]

Feed it to my cat.

Or mix the blood in the tomato-sauce, and cut flesh as pepperoni slices and make a giant ass pizza and throw a "party" with my friends

 

[Shifty Tortoise]

You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.

And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it?

Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead.

You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter.

You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

 

[elvor0]

I'd eat it. No chance of finding it at all then, then make a broth stock out of the bones.

om nom nom nom?

Well i spose if you become a murderer might as well go for the cannibal package too

In all honesty, I don't think I'd have qualms about eating human anyway, all other meats taste nice, right?

 

[z3rostr1fe]

Feed it to a meat grinder... Then make it into patties!

EDIT:

Easy as pie i would hide it in a pie [that rhymed]

Something like Sweeney Todd did? Niiiiice....

 

[Sark]

I would place it in a gutter in the next town over. Nobody would suspect a thing.

 

[Daniel_Rosamilia]

I'd chop it to pieces. Then I'd burn them. Then I'd build up a stack of firewood with the ashes in the center, and burn them again. Then, I'd mix the ashes (wood ashes too) in with cement into a 2X8 brick. Then I'd toss the brick into a heavily polluted public waterway in another country.

Good luck findin' that, suckers.

For some reason, I'm compelled to find you, just to see if you're in an insane asylum...
But I like it, just add something else:
I'd chop it to pieces. Then I'd burn them. Then I'd build up a stack of firewood with the ashes in the center, and burn them again. Then, I'd mix the ashes (wood ashes too) in with some slops and feed it to a pig. Then I'd burn the pig, melt t into a 2x8 brick, and throw the brick into a heavily polluted public waterway in another country.

There, I like it.

 

[Mjolnir36]

Go to the cemetary and put it UNDER theone of the new grave sites.

 

[similar.squirrel]

A lake, I guess. Never really thought about it. Is this normal?

 

[jopomeister]

In a car park under the police station!
Where they least expect it mwahaha.

 

[Ldude893]

Wait a minute, you're no innocent individual with a query OR an undercover cop. You're a crook attempting to get some ideas!

I don't have a trace on your IP Address, but that won't keep me from stopping you.


/dramatica]

 

[GrinningManiac]

Anyone know that story about the woman who killed her husband with a frozen ham, then fed the ham to the investigators that came to look for him? They ate all the evidence without realising.

Yeah.

Travel to New York, have holiday. On the last day, whilst heading to the airport, randomly kill a hooker in an alleyway. Board plane, return to Britain

Don't need disposal, only a few hours to get away

 

[Jezzascmezza]

Nom nom nom.
That's all.

 

[Vrex360]

The crocodile enclosure at my local Zoo. Simmo, the resident male saltwater crocodile at the Perth City Zoo is two tonnes of insatiable apetite and given that crocodiles can eat skin, hair, clothes and bone there would be literally nothing left.

I get rid of evidence and he gets a feed, everyone wins.... except for the person I killed obviously.

 

[bam13302]

I would put it in my inventory