why do some peoplel insist you'll want children?

[Wounded Melody]

Have you ever come across someone who insists you'll want to have children in the future, even if you are currently dead set against it? Recently a nurse came to our home and somehow the discussion got to children (she has 4 and 2 jobs). I said there was NO WAY I wanted children (I've contemplated surgery, but it's too expensive) but she kept insisting I'd change my mind. She even said her sister was like me and now has 2 kids. She isn't the first person I've met with this mindset. WHY are people like this? Have you ever come across people like this? What do you usually say to them?

 

[Pimppeter2]

Children give people purpose.

They all insist.

Until they get to know me.

 

[Paragon Fury]

I'd would've put it simply, as I tend to do:

In the choice between children and castration, I'll get a little lighter.

 

[Rutskarn]

Well, the urge to reproduce is a fairly strong one, and usually doesn't manifest until a person reaches a certain level of maturity. There's some truth in what she says; most people who say they don't want children will, eventually, feel the compulsion.

This isn't to say you definitely will want children, and she's being a bit rude and presumptuous, but she isn't coming from nowhere.

EDIT: Now, if your profile info is correct, it's probably safe to say that your disinterest in having children is concrete. She is being rude in assuming you don't know what you want by now.

 

[Sprogus]

Some people see it as an achievement to squeeze out a baby. Or maybe they just want you to be as miserable as they are. Personally I don't want to have kids either. The world is already over populated, why would I want to add to that?

 

[Allan53]

People who say that universally have children. Apart from the instinctual drive to propogate (not sure that's as common as people think, or if it is partially socially created), it's a simple case of cognitive dissonance.

Raising kids is hard, expensive, and quite frequently massively inconvenient. So, given that, why in the name of god would any sane person have kids? Very simple. We pretend to ourselves that we in fact want kids, and get some (conveniently vague) reward out of doing so. But if, having gone down this psychological pathway, the parent sees someone who chooses not to, this threatens their carefully constructed mindset. So how does any person react when we see something deviant? We either distance ourselves from it (often through disapproval, but not always), or we attempt to change it so it agrees with our norms.

That's my theory, anyway.

 

[Wounded Melody]

Well, the urge to reproduce is a fairly strong one, and usually doesn't manifest until a person reaches a certain level of maturity. There's some truth in what she says; most people who say they don't want children will, eventually, feel the compulsion.

This isn't to say you definitely will want children, and she's being a bit rude and presumptuous, but she isn't coming from nowhere.

EDIT: Now, if your profile info is correct, it's probably safe to say that your disinterest in having children is concrete. She is being rude in assuming you don't know what you want by now.

Yes, that's my real info.
She probably thinks you can change your mind at any point in life--her 50 year old sister is going to adopt, unless she can actually still conceive.
(gah why do strangers even discuss such things with me???)

 

[TheTim]

its probably in human nature to want children to carry your bloodline

 

[Generator]

I think it has something to do with "happy couple syndrome". You know, like when two people who have just entered a relationship like to act like it's the greatest thing in the world and like they know everything? Yeah, seems to be basically the same thing with babies.

Although, I've never really had to deal with people like this as I've decided I want kids: Since my parents were generally pretty good, I don't get to "be a better parent," so instead I'm going to be a hell of a lot worse so that I can tell my kids to be better parents to their kids. It sounds cold and heartless, but they'll thank me when they're older and don't have to be mean to their kids... or something like that.

 

[jamesworkshop]

I haven't met anyone like that but I want to have kids someday anyway.

 

[Juven Ignus]

I guess they just really want the human race to continue, but I want kids, so I don't really mind those kinda people.

I'm planning on going old school on them and hitting them.

 

[TheEggplant]

How can someone refuse to admit the best movie EVAR is in fact the best movie ever?
"Walk a mile in my shoes" is a phrase most people can't wrap their heads around.
Because then they would be forced to admit that everyone is different.
Then they would have to accept that they truly are alone.

 

[Cody211282]

Because most people between the ages of 15-30 don't really want kids but most change their mind at some point. I know right now I don't want any I also know that human biology will push me to want some at some point.

 

[Flight]

To some people, having children is just something one does, regardless of money issues, overpopulation worries or maturity levels. They don't seem to think about the repercussions of having children when one doesn't want to or when one isn't ready. Personally, I don't ever want children.

 

[Paragon Fury]

Because most people between the ages of 15-30 don't really want kids but most change their mind at some point. I know right now I don't want any I also know that human biology will push me to want some at some point.

Then you best be kicking biology in the testes before that point boy.

To the tube-cutters with you! Away!

 

[Cody211282]

Because most people between the ages of 15-30 don't really want kids but most change their mind at some point. I know right now I don't want any I also know that human biology will push me to want some at some point.

Then you best be kicking biology in the testes before that point boy.

To the tube-cutters with you! Away!

Eh I see no big deal about it if I can afford it and my wife wants one to, I just want a stable situation before I even have to talk about having any.

 

[blankedboy]

They're a pain, but they're necessary.