Why me?

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kittii-chan 300

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Feb 27, 2011
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i hate smoke and it was going into my face so i changed seats and it followed me. so i moved back and it followed me again. i continued until i made a trail of smoke by running around the table...
 

TonyVonTonyus

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Dec 4, 2010
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I saw a glitch in the game I was playing where the area in front of me hadn't been rendered, I went into it anyways...my disk drive broke.
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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vending machine ripped me off

the packet of delicious sour cream and sweet chili chips feel exactally in a way that ment I couldnt get at them from the door at the bottom

and I was really hungry too
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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TonyCapa said:
I saw a glitch in the game I was playing where the area in front of me hadn't been rendered, I went into it anyways...my disk drive broke.
really? that kind of stuff can happen? I didnt know....
 

emeraldrafael

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Jul 17, 2010
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I get a lot of moments like that.

I will quote myself here if I do not mind (and I dont think I do) just to prove it Thsi was back in 2008 when all thsi happened.

emeraldrafael said:
The Man With the Soap said:
emeraldrafael said:
<spoiler=Snip>Without being injured? that narrows it down quite a bit, but alright.

This all happened in 2008, but that sjust one month of one year.

April 10 - Anniversary of my gf's death. Go to the cemetery she's buried at to spend the day (like I always do, though this year I wont be able to), go to walk home, fall in empty grave (wasnt paying attention) Storm comes and plot starts to fill. (Not really life threatening, but if I had fell and passed out I could have drowned I guess).

April 13th (A friday that year) - Through what can only be described as an act of god, lightning strikes just behind where I had stepped.

April 29th - Death pulls out all the stops. Driving (Illegally, but meh, the cops in my town dont have enough time to chase me) and an SUV almost t-bones me on the driver's side. I swerve, hits the back, sends me spinning and I stall out near train tracks. Open the door (not paying attention, go to step out, then remembers hat so bends to get it, train rips off door). Safely get out on the otherside of the car, car almost hits me. Flip over the hood, car rips off that door. Sit and sigh, figuring I need to just stay put, and someone drives into the back, knocking me off hood of car and the car over me, spend 40 minutes under it while the tow truck comes to get it off. Finally go home, think i'm safe, Carbon Monoxide leak.

You wanna talk about luck.
April just ain't your month, huh?
never has been. The rest of the month went like this (and the only reason I didnt post itbefore was because I was injured, so it wouldnt have counted in accordance to the rules):

April 1st - April Fools Day, my friend Jake thinks it would be funny to get me bitten by something venomous. Makes me stick my hand into a Brown Recluse nest.

April 1-5th - Spend time in hospital on life and death.

April 8th - Go out hunting with bow, because I felt in the mood for deer jerky and a family friend wanted some to. See a 14 point buck and take aim. Hit it, kill it, go to get it ready to take home, 11 point buck gores me in my shoulder. Lay in the forest bleeding out for three hours after having to kill it with Tomahawk (I know, I channeled my inner rambo) before my uncle finds me.

April 20 - Burglar strikes my house, steals about $2500 of stuff, but we get it back all except my savings of $650.

April 26 - In car with my friend Ryan, car flips over. Ryan goes to hospital with Broken arm and fractured ankle. I go to hospital for a branch sticking through my left shoulder (cause the universe likes to keep it even I suppose).

Awful lot of shoulder reconstruction that year. I'm rather surprised I dont just have steel shoulders and be done with it.
 

M Rotter

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Dec 18, 2010
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i was carrying a mop while trying to hurry, got it caught on a low hanging ceiling and smashed my face into it, bending my already bent glasses. Regular happening for me is to misjudge a corner and slam my face/shoulder/knee/other painful part of body into it. I get told its hilarious and cute but that makes it worse-its a fml that everyone thinks is so awdorwable
 

Johnny Impact

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Aug 6, 2008
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Dealing with hypocrisy at work is the most exhausting thing I've ever done. I'm tired of being the only one with "a problem. "

I misunderstood a rule at work the other day and did something I wasn't supposed to. I was told I should have known better, that I "had a problem." Less than five minutes after this, someone tried to break the very rule I was yelled at for breaking. I tried to stop him...and my boss overruled me and gave the other guy permission. A couple days later I caught my boss breaking the same rule. This rule comes from over his head, he does not have the power to let anyone break it. He was completely unapologetic and saw no hypocrisy in his actions whatsoever.

Another person who's half my boss and half not talks down to me like I'm a first-day rookie (I've been there thirteen years, as long as she has). She explains things a child of six should already know. I began to give her only half an ear when she spoke until I knew whether I needed to hear what she was saying or not. She must have complained to her boss because he took me aside and told me I'm "the one with the problem" because I don't show her enough respect. Not only is it okay for her to insult me this way, it's NOT okay for me to turn away and give her insult the attention it deserves, i.e. none.

Another boss lets people get away with anything. Perfect example: We had this girl on staff a couple years ago who would stroll in twenty minutes late every day, had three unexcused absences in her first month, and probably did about forty-five minutes of real work in a week. She had the worst work ethic of anyone I've ever encountered -- and I've seen some champion loafers in my day. Think Peter from Office Space only for real. Anyway, I told my boss repeatedly this person wasn't working out. He said I was imagining it, making a mountain out of a molehill. (She and he had a rapport, and by "rapport" I mean "she had a nice ass") The entire staff was pissed off at this girl. On the third unexcused absence, I said screw this, stepped up to do the job my boss should have done, and fired the fool girl. I'm supposed to have that authority, but apparently I don't, because the boss went over my head, and gave her another chance (her 18th, by my count). When I protested he told me I "had a problem."
 

staika

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Aug 3, 2009
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At my work place my boss refers to me as "That" employee as in that employee that everything bad happens to. I've only worked there for a year now and I've had to deal with....

-An asian lady calls from yellowbook.com because my boss wanted to take down the advertisement, now when I work I work alone and I couldn't handle that and I told her multiple times that I couldn't do it, so she MAKES me call my boss and he basically reiterates what I told her and after she called back and I told her that I couldn't do it she insisted I could and wouldn't let up and it dragged on for an hour until I finally persuaded her I couldn't take down the GOD DAMNED ADVERTISEMENT.

-One day I was on my way home from school and I'm on the highway and I get a call, it's my boss and he asks me if I could cover for my co-worker and during this conversation a jack-ass driver almost runs into me. so I'm pissed the moment I get to work and I'm only supposed to work for about 2 hrs and after 1 hr I hear flapping, but a customer came in at the moment so I head from the back office to the front of the store (its not that big of a store it is basically has the front area with two coolers for the beer (PS its a beer distributor) and the back area has a storage area and the office is connected by a door) and once I tend to the customer I head back to the office and LO AND BEHOLD a Pigeon somehow got into the store and made its way into the office and I had to catch it to get it away. So I'm forced to literally catch the Pigeon BARE HANDED and once I caught it, it was basically killing my hand. and after that happened my boss calls and he asked why I was short of breath and I tell him to which he responds "Oh cool, well (co-workers name) got stopped by the cops for speeding and he was driving with a suspended license so your gonna have to stay there till closing." Lets just say I was surprised I didn't verbally kill him because at that point I was really pissed.
 

ScoopMeister

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Mar 12, 2011
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I lost my phone and my key at the same time last month, then my Xbox died on my birthday a week or so later. This morning I lost my left contact lens. I swear I'm cursed with trivial but infuriating happenings and accidents.
 

Super Toast

Supreme Overlord of the Basement
Dec 10, 2009
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Forlorn Guardian said:
Laptop, PS3 and TV were stolen from my room after someone broke in through the window. I stay in a dorm, and on the THIRD FLOOR at that! Why not one of the ground floor rooms like a sane burglar!?
There's a perfectly rational explanation. You were robbed by Spider-man.

OT: I trip over a lot. That's about it.
 

theloneassassin

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Jan 1, 2011
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Forlorn Guardian said:
Laptop, PS3 and TV were stolen from my room after someone broke in through the window. I stay in a dorm, and on the THIRD FLOOR at that! Why not one of the ground floor rooms like a sane burglar!?
Yup, I have seen many dumb things like this, people almost seeming to go out of their way to fuck up your life.
 

artanis_neravar

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Apr 18, 2011
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Ladette said:
Well i'm considered to be the insane black sheep of the family.
95% of my co-workers are lazy fucks.
My boss is a lazy fuck and a complete pussy who won't do anything about the other lazy fucks at my job.
I can't take a day off because the guy who fills in for me fucks everything off and makes my job 10 times harder when I get back.
The wind blows pretty much every day where I live and not only ruins my hair, it gives me awful headaches.
I also just realized i'm out swiss roles.

If I wasn't so laid back i'd probably go on a work place shooting spree.
Mental Note give you some candy everyday.....

No real Why me moments but some oh Shit moments
1. Was hanging out with a friend and he decided he wanted to make a torch, so he soaked a sock in gas, wrapped it around a metal pole and lit it on fire (ignoring my objections) looks at it then goes "Oh...hot" and drops it on to the grass, I had to grab the hose and put it out because he wasn't reacting
2. In high school Calculus class, there were two girls in the class, one a really good friend of mine, the other an acquaintance. For a week and a half the acquaintance was out sick and every my friend complained about being the only girl in class. So the day the acquaintance came back to class without thinking I say "Wow it must be hard on her(acquaintance) being the only girl in class" Immediately I remember my friend sits right behind me and enjoys causing me physical pain when I don't do anything to deserve it. Needless to say that the fastest I have ever gone from one side of a classroom to another, over desks, but I still managed to get hit by a flying shoe.
 

artanis_neravar

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Apr 18, 2011
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No I lied one real Why Me moment
The Tuesday before Thanksgiving(the American one) we are supposed to go home(from college) for break. That day my best friends breaks fail, so I stay with him, until Wednesday when they can fix it. Heading home Wednesday, I'm maybe half an hour into my 3 hour trip, at night in the ran and my alternator dies, now for those of you who don't know the alternator is what keeps the battery charged, no alternator the battery starts to run out of juice. So driving with my wipers, and headlights on, and listen to the radio my battery dies pretty quickly, so now I'm stuck on the side of the Mass Pike, at night and in the rain, two and a half hours from anyone who can come get me. and to top it off I had to pee soooo bad. it was not a fun experience. And trying to explain where I was to AAA and the Staties, "Sir where exactly are you one the Mass pike it's a big place? Can you see any signs?" "I don't know it's dark and fucking raining I can't see anything"
I feel like god is trying to tell me not to help other people
 

Blobpie

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May 20, 2009
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When your by the camp fire and no matter WHERE you go the freakin smoke follows you... EVERYWHERE.
 

Yokai

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Oct 31, 2008
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Last week, I had a math assignment due. The night before the deadline, I had it all finished and set it on my desk, and went to sleep. My cat, tweaking little ***** that she is, had her nightly seizure, pulled the paper down from my desk and got mud and claw marks all over it.

Finding the mutilated sheet the next day, I raged for a bit, then remembered I could just copy the answers to a new sheet at lunch. So I printed another copy of the worksheet out at school, recopied everything(and fixed a few mistakes I'd made the first time around) and had it all ready to go. When I pulled it out in my math class, however, the first page appeared to be missing. It had the highest-worth problems on it, and I wanted to get as much credit as I could, so I was forced to turn in the original, bedraggled, partially incorrect mess, scribbling a hasty apology in the margin as I did so. I could not for the life of me figure out where the first page had gone--it seemed to have disappeared inside my bag.

But wait, that's not all! When I got home, I sorted out my papers, only to come to a surprising conclusion: the school printer printed double-sided sheets. I had been looking for three sheets of paper when there were only two, and the only reason I couldn't tell was because I never bothered to turn the first sheet over.

I lost it a little bit.
 

Vesaldius

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Mar 11, 2011
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Katana314 said:
Woodsey said:
Whenever and wherever I walk, the wind is always blowing in my direction. I once turned right around and it fucking continued blowing in my face!
Look on the bright side; at least you control the wind.

Woodsey: The Wind Waker


Yeah, just don't let him on your sail boat...

edit
Unless he faces the other way!
 

Daniel_Rosamilia

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Jan 17, 2008
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kman123 said:
I got diabetes.

Pretty much a 'why me' moment.

But hey, 11 years down the track and I'm still alive.


I was only eight, so I was just like 'What's going on?' What made it worse was the fact I was in hospital right before Christmas (December 23rd), but I went home on Christmas Day for a few hours, then went back.

It's been eight years and I have gotten used to it, but I still get people giving me weird looks when I do the sugar tests.
 

Womplord

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Feb 14, 2010
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I can't stand the FML site. It's just a bunch of sooks complaining about totally trivial and mundane things and it makes it obvious how privileged they really are (mostly).